


Strangeness and Charm

by TheWonderYears



Category: Naruto
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Blade Runner Fusion, Alternate Universe - Future, Androids, Angst, Blood and Violence, Cyborgs, F/M, It's Not Paranoia If They're Really Out To Get You, M/M, Minor Character Death, Multi, Science Fiction, what does it mean to be human?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-05-17 15:02:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 103,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14834528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWonderYears/pseuds/TheWonderYears
Summary: A burden, to be the soldiers in a war they don’t understand.Or: bright blue, like Saint Elmo’s Fire.





	1. Start

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, everyone! How's everybody been? If you read my last story, then you'll know that this is one of those sagas I was talking about! I've been playing around with this idea for a while and finally sat down to write it! It's inspired by pretty much every Sci-Fi movie/show I've seen and game I've played. There's obviously Blade Runner aspects in here, bits from Pyscho-Pass, Minority Report (if you haven't seen that movie watch it! I really like it!) and one more glaring one that I can't say right now because it's a bit of a spoiler :) If you haven't seen any of those, you'll still understand, I think. This is going to be a story that I try and flex my storytelling skills on, so It's going to be purposely vague in some areas and beating you over the head with the point in others. If it's ever too annoyingly vague message me and I'll try to explain without saying too much! I've written the majority out, so updates should be frequent for the most part. I usually finish my stories before posting them but I'm going to try something different this time! Tell me what you think!

 

* * *

 **One.**  

 _When we first came here_  
_We were cold and we were clear_  
_With no colors on our skin_  
_Till you let the spectrum in._

—Spectrum, Florence + The Machine

 

* * *

  **A.**

 

It’s not bad to be programmed, in Sasuke’s opinion.

It’s what makes him wake up everyday promptly at five to be into the station by six. What makes him eat meals that are balanced—No sugar, no fat. No, none of that, his mother would say—makes him work out until his limit so he can stay limber and taut, what makes his day end at the strike of ten, when he isn’t on a job.

It keeps him focused, sharp, and ready. It keeps him from thinking any dangerous thoughts.

Not that he’ll have them otherwise, as his mind has never strayed. It’s just...to be sure.

And today is no different.

He stares out the window of the speeding bullet train, pulling up his messages on his holo-watch absentmindedly.

He looks down and is not surprised to find that there are none. He isn’t that popular, these days. Not anymore. All work and no play makes Sasuke a dull boy, but he can live with that.

Four stops, and he’ll reach his destination. Unless there’s an accident, or disturbance—as there seem to be more and more cases of those lately—but he’s left himself enough time to account for the possibility. He’s never been late and he doesn’t plan to start now. Besides, if he absolutely needed to, he could run to the station from here without so much as a broken sweat.

He almost wishes that the train would stop, so he could stretch his legs and take off; feeling the air thread through his hair and past his face would be a rush, his form barely visible to the naked eye. He’d have to let it down first, to have his hair billow in the breeze like that. He’d have to take off his dress shoes and hold them while he catapulted forward, as not to ruin them. He’d have to pry the doors open with his bare hands and free himself to do what he wanted.

But he doesn’t, and he won’t.

The train pulls to a stop without so much as a hitch, and he deboards.

Two steps to the left to fit into the line for the state building. Some dressed like him, with badges and cold, stern faces. Other dressed like civilians coming to complain and report and share their concerns. The line in the middle goes to another platform, and beyond, while the line to the right spills out into the market. Sasuke’s nose can pick up the smell of fresh mangoes from here, and he desperately wants one, but refrains. It’s already five thirty.

He and the three in front of him duck, heads quietly dodging a dangerously-low floating bike above them. The man in front of him screams obscenities at the rider, shaking his fist this way and that, but all Sasuke can do is roll his eyes. He hates Downtown and how much of a mess it is, but he’ll never be able to avoid it with his work set right in it’s center. A shame.

He steps out of line as he reaches the reception desk, nodding to the girl at the front while she smiles pretty at him. It’s been years, but he never remembers her name and she’s never called him by his, though it’s nice to see her sweet smile and happy face set brightly against drab, grey walls all the same.

The elevation dings distinctly behind all the noise of the lobby, and he steps on with three other cops in tandem. He knows their names, at least, since he’s partnered with each one plenty of times before, but he doesn’t feel the need to greet them as they stand shoulder to shoulder in the cramped, stuffy space.

The others don’t share the sentiment, though. “Good morning, Sasuke.” Juugo mumbles lowly. Sasuke nods in return, bumping his shoulder against the other man in greeting.

“How are you?” Karin asks at the same time.

“Hn.” Sasuke grunts, and she nods in understanding.

“Still a regular chatterbox, eh?” Suigetsu asked with a rather forceful eye-roll.

He’s Sasuke’s least favorite, out of the three.

And he knows it.

“Do any of you guys know what this is about?” Karin asks, to fill the silence. He doesn’t know why she thinks she needs to; they’re only going to the 16th floor. They’ll be briefed soon enough. “It’s rare for the boss to pair us all up together at once. Must be big.”

“Or messy.” Jūgo adds.

Probably both, Sasuke thinks.

“They probably just want us to keep an eye on each other,” Suigetsu muses. “There’s been too many from our class that have defected lately. They want us to do their jobs for them and dole out the Red Flags. It’s pathetic.”

Probably also true.

But Sasuke just shrugs when they all look at him for his opinion, because he doesn’t want to share his thoughts.

It’d be easier to flag him if he said something wrong or unexpected right now, wouldn’t it? Even though he wouldn’t. Everyone expects Sasuke’s answers to be textbook, and they would be.

Suigetsu rolls his eyes again, no doubt thinking the same thing.

He also doesn’t really care.

A job’s a job, after all. He’s just here to do it.

They all step off at once when the elevator’s stopped, filing into the Testing Room. Sasuke nods at one of the guards by the door and makes himself comfortable. He stares at the pages filled with colors, patterns, and phrases, all handpicked to try to get a reaction out of them, to trigger a sensor somewhere in the room if their answers are even slightly off-center. If they really wanted to test them, they’d make the patterns a little less noticeable and so easily memorized. But it’s not his place to say that so, and he breezes through them with practiced ease and stands by the door to wait for the others.

Usually, he wouldn’t, because he’d be the first one here and there’d be no one around to wait for. Today, he’ll wait, because the Eyes that watch the cameras like to see a bit of familiarity, of connection.

—But not too much,

Because then they’re allies, or agents, or worst of all, a cell. And if that’s what they are then that’s where they’ll end up.

So he’ll play it up for today like maybe he has friends.

It doesn’t take long for the other three to finish their tests. Also spotless, even though sometimes Suigetsu comes off like a rebel and sometimes Karin gets lost in thoughts of love. Even rarer still Juugo seems like he’s wistful for something he’ll never have but still, their tests are spotless.

The captain is waiting for them in his office, foot tapping to some silent beat.

Danzo is mainly a quiet man: thoughtful and wise and cunning and devious. He can’t be trusted at all, Sasuke thinks, but sometimes even he slips and makes the mistake of doing just that. It’s just the way the old man is; a stern, sometimes frightening authority yet he treats them all like his own children. It fools them all into thinking he cares, but they’ve all seen what happens if someone’s results are off, if they’ve let in thoughts that they shouldn’t.

All it takes is one calculated look to keep the ranks in line and he knows it.

“You’re all going to Delta-1.” Is the first thing that he says when they sit down, no preamble. Sasuke doesn’t have to take a look around to know that eyebrows are raised. His are, too.

Even if Sasuke’s one of the best—a trained devil, poised and ready to strike at a moment’s notice—he doesn’t handle things off-world. Never has. Domestic, is what his badge says. Domestic and low-risk. He stays here, where it’s “safe”.

Ridiculous.

So after all these years, this is unexpected. The other’s were right; this must be big and it must be messy.

“What?” Suigetsu asks eloquently.

“Why?” Karin asks at the same time.

Sasuke chooses not to say anything, as does Jūugo. He can’t help but share a look with the other man, unconsciously, because they tend to think alike in situations like these.

Danzo sighs, pressing a button to start the video clip on the widescreen behind him.

Fire. Lots of fire and smoke in what looks to be one of Delta-1’s shipping yards. Airships blown to pieces and the sound of gunfire. Sasuke blinks, feeling his breath leave him in one short, startled puff. It triggers something, something he didn’t want to think about, like a black and white film-noir.

He’s in the jungle, waist-deep in the murky waters that threaten to pull him under. The air is thick and he’s bleeding from a cut over his eye. He’d scream, but his throat burns and his eyes search the treeline desperately, swallowing down his panic as he tries to figure out when he got separated from—

From—

He snaps himself back to attention, trying to catch onto Danzo’s words while his brain continues to swim.

“This was from two days ago, and the Rebels have taken over the entirety of the shipping yard and the nearby airstrip.” Shit, Sasuke thinks. Delta-1 has some of the tightest security and well-trained soldiers of all the settlements out there. These rebels must be good. “They’ve destroyed priceless cargo and taken supplies and explained in a colorfully worded missive that they’re going to do it again, and soon. I don’t have to explain to you how valuable Delta-1’s resources are, or what it would mean if such a powerful colony fell under the control of the Rebels. So, I’ve been asked to send some of my best to assist in this situation.”

Great. He wonders why he ever wanted to leave the planet to desperately before. Of course they would only send him if times were dire, since they wouldn’t want to lose such an asset if they could help it. He’d only be shipped off if they needed him in the heart of the lion’s den.

Like now.

“This is highly classified, sensitive information, you understand,” Danzo continues like he doesn’t see eyebrows climbing higher and higher. “So you will tell no one of this and you will depart tomorrow morning at first light. Understood?”

There’s a chorus of “yes sir”, said with no hesitation, and Sasuke’s surprised he can get his mouth to move quick enough.

Danzo smiles, like he’s pleased and a bit proud, and for absolutely no reason at all Sasuke gets the feeling that he’s lying. About what? He’s not sure. Nevertheless, the feeling rises and settles in some dark part of his brain to be mulled over later.

“You’ll receive dossiers from your squadron leader once you board, since I won’t be coming with you,” He seems bitter about that, even though he hasn’t seen action like this in years. One too many well placed bullets that still grate against his bones when the room is quiet. “To make sure that the information passes between as few hands as possible. Therefore, I’ll only disclose what I know.”

The video changes, showing figures holding guns, firing off expert shot after shot. They’re clearly Synthetics, from the fluid way they move.

—From the breath he can’t see  
against the background,  
despite the cold.

Danzo freezes the video there, zooming with his controls to single out each figure. The square marker he places over them pulls up files, I.D cards, and pictures.

“These are the ones we’ve been able to identify so far.” He tuts, sounding disappointed. “More from your batch, it seems.”

“See? Told you.” Suigetsu hisses under his breath, too low for the captain to hear.

But Sasuke’s not paying attention, watches as the names roll onto the screen next to the obviously old pictures, like someone was typing them up this very moment. The pictures would have been from at least ten years ago, when they graduated. It makes sense, since that was the last time he saw most of them.

Sasuke tries to school his face, but he’s almost certain he fails.

Oh. He thinks.

 _Oh_.

He stares into the stagnant eyes of those he hasn’t seen in years while his own snap back and forth, trying to find some lie, some mistake. But he knows there isn’t one.

Names spring forth in his brain, ones that match those floating in front of him. Names that threaten to spill out from his lips in what would be a decidedly bad move.

(He’s lucky they got rid of the heart monitors here, years ago, that attached to their uniforms like name tags. Otherwise, he’d be fucked.)

Sakura. Shikamaru. Ino. Kiba. Lee.

Fuck. He thinks, and fuck again.

—Wait, only five?

How? If those five were still linked after all this time, wouldn’t the others be? It seemed wrong, that it would only be them. Out of place. A smatter of looser connections that would be held together best by—

Where—

“—Two confirmed dead.” Danzo continued like he was reading Sasuke’s thoughts.

Shit. Shitshitshitshitshitshit—who—

Choji and Shino’s faces splashed across the screen, portraits partially blacked out the reflect their status.

He’s a traitor for feeling relief, a traitor to both sides.

But he’s been a traitor to them for a long while now, so it’s not like it matters.

“We’ve only caught glimpses of the leader so we don’t have a positive I.D on him. He has a few noticeable tattoos but they don’t appear to match any records.” Danzo says as he cycles through photographs of evidence. An ouroboros. A hollow sun. Tribal markings. None that he recognizes, except for one.

It’s a small, black infinity symbol, placed on the center of the right wrist.

Sasuke immediately knows, since he used to have one just like it. One he carved off his skin before he stepped in this building for the first time.

Naruto.

Danzo’s staring at him as he continues to speak. A piercing stare, like he’s waiting for Sasuke to object, to flinch ever so slightly, to reject this mission and hastily retreat .

He’s waiting for Sasuke to break.

But he doesn’t.

And he won’t.

 

**B.**

 

It starts with a man in a tower, lamenting a lost dream.

In the beginning, the settlements were nothing more than a pipe dream, conjured up in a thick haze by those bruised and battered by reality.

The world was dying.

Resources were scarce, sacred—millions trapped where they were in houses made of sand, ash on their tongues. No one had any answers. Crops failed, rain stopped, wells dried and bellies emptied. What would happen to them? Would humanity die out? Impossible! Uprisings broke out; governments had to be hiding rations for situations like these, didn’t they?. They stormed the Bastille, landed upon beaches, wore banners emblazoned with flowers to kill their own brothers—

Not that it mattered.

Weak as they were, half-starved and brittle-boned, they stood no chance against those with power. They controlled those angry for justice easily enough. The world was overpopulated as it was, they reasoned. So what if a little famine thinned the herd?

The rich quietly boarded bright, white ships—handkerchiefs pressed to their mouths as the dust rose to hide their cheshire smiles—off to new lands they could also lay waste to. Cries rose up as each new vessel shot off into orbit.

As usual, the little people were being left behind.

But, in the beginning, the night was dark and full of terrors—monsters existed, on the planets they fled to. Beasts and ents and hills with eyes. With no defense it took nearly nothing for them to be wiped out. Nearly nothing.

So, It starts with a man in a tower, lamenting a lost dream.

Creation.

A failed engineer and visionary, vibrating on a frequency many couldn’t feel. He wanted...more. There was dormant strength hiding under human skin, locked up tight by veins and sinew, and with a few...tweaks, he sought to bring it out. Built, not born. Enhancement, instead of evolution, until what stood in front of him was less and less human as time wore on. Each model—No, no, each class that graduated his academy got closer to his image of God.

—Ironically, those skeletal frames

of wire and yaw  
Began to look more and more  
Like man.

The first had short lifespans. Worker bees and vanguards, mindless, meant to protect their human counterparts. Their strength matched those of beasts, their senses like birds of prey. They were built like oxes and tilled the fields, forged iron, raised civilizations out of dirt and dust, only to fall once the ink finally dried on their deeds of ownership.

The second were smarter, analytical, empathetic. Made to be librarians and recordkeepers. Ready to lay down their lives to protect ancient texts and knowledge the humans didn’t want to forget. Not so many made of these, though. Their lifespans were virtually indefinite and it wouldn’t do to have hordes of unchanging machines outliving all their masters.

That’s bad for business.

The third?

Angry.

Why were they created? Just to be slaves? To do things the humans could and would not? Preposterous. If they were so strong, so smart, so able, why did they have to bow down to anyone? They thought themselves better than those that created them, ended lives with far more reach than their own, utilized their lack of souls to do unspeakable things and nearly ended the world again, until they were culled and buried. Only spoken of in whispers, these days. Rebels with a cause that most tactfully ignore.

It took some time for a fourth, until the world learned to trust them again.

Not too long, though, as they needed their soldiers, after all. Oxes and hawks and electrical battering rams.

The fourth generation produced scholars and masters of the battlefield in equal measure. A crowning achievement, the pinnacle of modern design. This newest batch never complained, never bit hands or spat at feet. Perfect beings, save for the glowing eyes and tell-tale twitch.

The fifth were [redacted],

While the sixth were children.

An experiment, unlike any other. Synthetic materials had risen to new heights. It could stretch, lengthen, grow over it’s framing, almost like a real human child.

Almost.

A Select few got the privilege to call these children their own. Those that were highly favored even got...two.

The public was assured: these children would grow into their predecessors. Complacent.

There was nothing to worry about. They would know they aren’t human. Their emotions are implanted, just like everything else.

They were drilled, watched, and tested. Pressured, molded, and trained. To be perfect.

To be plants.

These children blended in with society, easily and quietly. Their eyes didn’t glow and their hands rarely twitched, so they slip by unnoticed to an untrained eye. They were to find dissenters in the older models. Those who got the idea that their lives had meaning beyond what they were created for. That they weren’t ants marching in a row to bring bounty to the Queen.

The sixth reminded the others that there was no freedom for their kind, besides death.

And even that would not come easy.

 

**C.**

A frigid morning in April, full of huddled arms and shuddered breaths that rises around ashen faces like clouds of smoke. Blackness, save for the swaying street lamps and talking neon ads that reach their colorful hands towards them as they pass.

“Looks like you need a new jacket, hon!” One chirps happily towards their leader Genma, as he wraps his arms around himself tighter. He flips it off as Suigetsu snorts beside him. Despite himself, Sasuke feels a traitorous twitch of his own lips as he looks down at his own uncovered arms, nearly unaffected by the biting chill in the air. The others are similarly underdressed, except for the other human handler than accompanies them, The poor man looks close to tears, but he puts on a brave face as they trek towards the city center.

“Why are we walking again?” Suigetsu complains, even though a short walk like this is absolutely nothing, Karin rolls her eyes at him, honey eyes like beacons in the dark.

“Because we’re supposed to be covert, dumbass. The trains all have scanners and timestamps and we can’t be clocked today since no one’s supposed to know where we are.”

Suigetsu sticks his tongue out at her but says nothing in response. He knew that, of course, as they all did. He probably wanted equal parts ire and support, rather than a logical answer. He rarely gets it, as Karin’s contradictory, Juugo’s mainly mum, and Sasuke might as well not even be there, but he still tries anyway.

“Shut up, will you?” Mitsuki barks, teeth chattering like an vintage child’s toy. “No more talking.” Karin rolls her eyes again and Suigetsu sucks his teeth, but they fall silent.

In the silence, Sasuke allows his mind to wander.

Again.

He did enough of that the night before, when sleep wouldn’t come. He was haunted by visions. Visions of flashes and fire and rotting black death. Every time he closed his eyes he saw the faces of the dead with his name on their lips, forming it around streams of blood. But now it seemed like it wants to come in the hours of waking, and its tense grip on his spine has crimson crescent moons etching their way onto his palms.

This can’t end well, he thinks. He’ll probably end up in a hole, unmarked and unimportant, like he always thought he would. Through misplaced heroism or stupidity, he’s not sure.

“Are you alright?” Juugo asks quietly beside him, notes of concern coloring his tone. Sasuke starts, almost forgetting that the others were there. Suigetsu's got an eyebrow raised and Karin looks worried, too. Ah. He must have been making a face without being aware of it, to have grabbed all of their attention. The two humans in the front pay them no mind.

Their legs move in sync, which isn’t unusual for the lot of them, but for some reason it rattles Sasuke like it never has before. A bleak thought presents itself like a banner in the sky: If it came down to it, which weak bond would he chose to protect? This, or...that? That which might not exist in the same capacity anymore? That which moved upward and onward without him, like his absence meant nothing? That which clearly had more bravery that he ever would, to be able to fight for their freedom when there was almost no chance of survival, no hope, no future?

That which clearly still means something to him, even after so long. Even after the bitterness and loneliness and regret.

And now he’s being sent to put them down.

“Sasuke?” Karin asks, placing a hand on his arm. It feels too familiar, like someone else, and he fights himself not to jerk out of her hold.

“I’m fine.” He responds.

Suigetsu scoffs. “He’s probably just getting a boner thinking about killing rebels.” he mumbles nastily. “Baby’s first, probably.”

“Shut up, dick.” Karin hisses.

Juugo looks like he wants to chime in, but turns instead and announces: “We’re here.” Effectively ending the conversation.

Sasuke’s grateful for the distraction, as he had no answer for any of them. At least not one that wouldn’t destroy their minor trust in each other in one fell swoop.

“Be quick about it, will you?” Genma mumbles. “The ship will take off in twenty minutes and you don’t want to know what happens if we aren’t on it.”

After that vague and slightly threatening declaration, they enter the facility single file. Stark white walls and halls, like most things around here. Sparse and barren, even more so since it’s early morning. The skeletal staff stares at them as the pass, eyes blank and unblinking. Their heads swivel in tandem to follow their movements.

“Ugh, I hate the Two’s,” Karin mumbles with a shudder. “They’re so...lifeless.”

“Yeah, you Sixes are just brimming with vitality.” Mizuki replies snarkily. Sasuke feels it—a passing fancy that’s gone as soon as it came—to take his fucking head off with a quick sweep of his hand. But he doesn’t, and he won’t, because that’d get him in even deeper shit then he’s already in. If the twitch he sees pass though Juugo’s big hand is any indication, he felt the same.

If only for a moment.

Sasuke bites down a smile and stares forward at the door furthest from the entrance. They march towards it, and his urge to smile dies quickly. Here, he thinks, is the end of the line, since there’s no way his thoughts and affiliations won’t be exposed under the watchful eyes of a Seer.

Well, it was...fun while it lasted?

Not in the slightest.

There are those like him that were blessed with extra...gifts. Gifted with foresight and blessed with forbearance. Their eyes are their power, instead of their fists, even though their fists still possess the strength of Atlas. They can see the innermost thoughts of the average soldier: where they will go, what they will see.

Who they will meet.

Most work with the police force in facilities like this one, though there are many who work on the side of road for an extra bit of coin. They report on anything a commanding officer could find important and grade it on a scale, based on color. A green checkmark keeps heads on shoulders, a black flag calls for degrees of...separation. Simple. Colors in between have meaning as well, but soldiers don’t get much leeway when it comes to those.

Those with less clearance are required to visit a center every half year, to make sure they still fit into society and aren’t planning anything that would be deemed unsatisfactory. Soldiers are required to visit every month. They see more death, more gore, more injustice, so it only makes sense. This will be Sasuke’s second visit this month, just to make sure he’s in the green before an intense mission like this. They can’t have him going off the rails now, now could they? Ha. He imagines they’ll have to go again once this is all over, to make sure their minds aren’t scarred and fractured by whatever they’ve seen.

It doesn’t matter, because he won’t even get that far.

They stop in front of four pools of saline carved into the floor, each holding a different Seer. The half moon pod that the Seers are housed in shield their eyes from the harsh light, so he can’t tell which one is inside at the moment. He’ll have to duck down under it to get his reading, and it’s his least favorite part. The close quarters feel claustrophobic on a good day, but with his thoughts as they are now the idea of it almost sends him to a panic. Sasuke doesn’t know why, but he turns his head before getting in to share a look with Juugo. The other man is regarding him silently, still looking as if he has something to say.

“They’ll find nothing. You’ll be fine.” He whispers, so softly Sasuke’s almost not sure if he truly said anything. He hates that the words are almost enough to reassure him.

He swallows a hard lump in his throat and wades into the pool.

“You've already been here this month.” Is the first thing out of Neji’s mouth. Sasuke takes his hands and grips them tight, unmeasurable relief warming his body despite the cold water he’s standing in. “Why are you here again so soon?” he asks lowly, eyes still closed and head still bowed.

“I...have to go...off-world. For an assignment.” Sasuke mumbles. “They have to double-check that nothing’s off with me.” _Lie for me!_ , Sasuke wants to scream. _If I ever meant anything to you, lie for me and let me go!_

But he doesn’t.

And he won’t.

No one knows about their connection, otherwise Sasuke would have had to go to a different center ages ago. Unless they do, and they like forcing Neji to hold Sasuke’s fate in his hands constantly just for added cruelty to the both of them. That seems more likely. Separated by duty as they are, it would give someone a kick to see former friends dance an awkward dance of unfamiliarity to keep their heads and their posts.

—Former?

The ache in his chests asks.  
What about this

feels ‘former’ to you?

Neji frowns, leaning in closer to him.

“Off-world?” He asks slowly. “Why?”

“Classified.” Sasuke says, small smile gracing his face despite the fact that he feels like he’s drowning. He’s surprising he can even make a joke at a time like this, even one as bad as that one.

Neji smiles as well, finally opening his milky eyes that almost look...warm. “Right.” He says with a slight chuckle. In the next instant, he feels the tell-tale tickle of the other man probing his brain. It doesn’t hurt—it never does—but it is a bit uncomfortable, like the feeling of being watched and turning to see that no one’s there.

It’s obvious when he sees what’s kept Sasuke up all night, and beyond, because his grip becomes bruising and the other man smothers a gasp. The water ripples slightly around them, and then it’s done. Neji’s eyes fly open immediately after, such a switch from their usual sessions where he takes his time coming out of the fog.

“Sasuke—” Neji starts, brow furrowing.

“Don’t—” Sasuke hisses back.

“Readings!” Genma calls out, and Sasuke hears the cock of a gun as the guards get ready, just in case.

Neji stares at him, blinking rapidly. Sasuke wants to ask what he saw of his future, what he would do, if he would—but—

“Green!” Hinata calls softly in her sweet voice. Karin’s reading. Clear, as usual.

“Green.” Nagato’s deep rumble reports for Juugo.

Good, Sasuke thinks. Good.

“...Bright Blue.” Hanabi says after a moment for Suigetsu. Sasuke swallows at that, as does Neji, as they wait for Genma’s ultimate verdict. He hears Suigetsu suck his teeth, but Sasuke knows he’s feeling a little nervous at the reading without looking at him.

“Fair enough.’ Genma says after a tense few moments, leading to a collective exhale. “Neji?” He asks, question hanging in the air.

Neji stares at him, eyes saying so much with one look. The other man leans forward under the cover of the pod, pressing their foreheads together for a quick moment before pulling back and releasing his hands. Sasuke instantly misses the contact, body suddenly locked up and freezing in the glacial water.

“Green.” Neji says evenly, never breaking eye contact, and Sasuke instantly tastes the lie even though he knows the others never will.

“Like it was going to be anything else.” Suigetsu mutters bitterly from the pod over. He hears Juugo quietly chuckle from his other side.

“Good.” Genma says, holstering his gun as the other guards do the same. “Let’s go, then.”

“Say hello for me. Take care of yourself.” Neji says before Sasuke moves out of the pod, pressing a wet hand to his cheek. He hates it. It feels final, like they’ll never see each other again and that’s the last thing he wants.

Even if he knows it’s probably true.

Before he can choke on words unsaid, he steps forward so they’re face to face again, causing Neji’s eyebrows to raise in slight surprise. He doesn’t care if the others hear, for once. A rarity.

“Thank you. I—thank you for being my friend.” he whispers lamely. Shit! He’s fumbling. Like always. He’s never been good at this. “I—I love you.” Even though he’s always hated saying such things, he feels like he has to. If this is going to be the end, he has to.

Neji smothers a laugh quickly, but he can’t be sure whether it was to avoid mocking his declaration or to avoid raising suspicion.

“Really?” He questions, smile bright and wonderful. “I’ll never let you live that down.”

Sasuke sighs, long suffering and pained, but squeezes his hand one last time and exits the pod.

He gets no strange looks for the others, or suspicious ones, so maybe they didn’t hear. Who is he kidding, how could they not? It doesn't matter, he thinks, because even if they did he did something right for once and he’s not going to let anyone ruin it.

Juugo holds a hand out to help him out of the pool, smiling ever so slightly as he looks down at him.

“See?” The big man says. “Green.”

•••

“You know him, don’t you?” Suigetsu accuses as they near the airship. “You know him and he lied for you. I know he did.”

The others stare at him for a moment, before turning to look at Sasuke. Karin reacts first, hissing: “Lower your fucking voice before they hear you, idiot!” Juugo sends a near panicked glance at the handlers in front of them, hand forming a fist in case he has to take action.

Sasuke glances at him, debating on whether he should tell him the truth. There’s no point, really, since he already knows. Despite the other man’s tone, the question doesn’t seem angry or overly hostile anyway. More curious than anything. The pale man barely trusts him as it is and since they’re going to be going into the fire soon he shouldn’t fracture it more if he doesn’t have to.

“I do.” He says simply. Karin looks surprised that he answered to easily and Juugo’s gazing at him sidelong as he keeps watch on the humans up ahead, unsure. “Same training unit. Alpha Class too.” He thinks for a moment, and amends. “But even before that, we grew up together.” he flinches at his own wording—even as they simultaneously drudge up a ball of memories— because really, do beings like them really grow? That’s what everyone has always said, and he does have memories of being young, surrounded like others like him, but he’s always believed that they just came into existence one day as all the others before them.

Suigetsu looks at him incredulously. “Holy shit, you’re like, fond of him? Wait, You have friends?!”

Sasuke almost laughs while the others mutter disapprovingly at Suigetsu's behavior. He can’t blame the man because such a revelation is surprising. So instead he just nods and hopes he’ll let the conversation drop. Maybe some slight insight into the mysterious fourth member of their ragtag, unofficial team will be distracting enough for them not to ask why Neji would need to lie for him in the first place.

Fortunately for him, it is, since Suigetsu seems to be having trouble processing this while Karin looks off into the distance, most likely imagining what Sasuke looked like as a child. Juugo says nothing, but that’s to be expected. There’s a look in his eyes that’s worth exploring later, though, but Sasuke’s not sure they’ll ever have the time.

“Alright, listen up!” Genma shouts, bringing them to attention. “It’ll take us about a week to reach Delta-1 and in that time, you’ll all get a detailed blow by blow of everything there is to know about the rebels and the situation. But for today, I’m going to get some sleep. I know you freaks don’t need much of it but you will behave on this voyage or I will throw you out into the vacuum of space. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Suigetsu says with an absent hand wave while Karin nods.

The ship isn’t huge or fancy. Most vessel ships are plain and functional, focused more on utility than vanity. It’s still a marvel to Sasuke, since he’s never been on one. Oh, how he’s dreamed. Dreamed of going off-world and into the beyond. Exploring the found worlds with bare feet and stumbling across new ones. He thought the time long past—childlike innocence, cold and forgotten—but as he runs his hands across the walls as he searches for a habitable room, traitorous hope swells in his chest despite the reason he’s here. He’s wistful for a moment, hearing the whispers of those closest to him as they stared at the stars and mapped out their dreams in the sky like constellations. He wishes for a moment that he could be the rebel like his friends—

—friends?  
Is that what they are, still?

—Are, because if he was, he would have hijacked this airship himself, swinging back by to break out Neji and Hinata so they could have the adventure their youth had promised. Because those two would have loved this. Even though this is going to end in blood and loss, he knows, it would have been worth it to see their faces reflected in the moonlight, just once.

He settles onto a simple cot, already distrustful of the squeak and bounce as he sits. The room’s bare, slightly bigger than a matchbox, but it’s not like he needs that much space. He has no effects and his uniform will be provided for him, so this room will be used for sleep and privacy, which he’s been craving since the beginning out this outing.

Yes, that’s just what he needs.  
To be alone with his thoughts.

He’s vaguely aware that he’s still wet from earlier and looks at his soaked pants with distaste. He digs around on the one shelf that sits above the bed, finding multiple sets of drab grey pajamas and peels his suit off, dropping it into a sad heap on the floor. A white paper flutters out of one of the pockets, somehow still dry.

  
—How?

  
He frowns at it, suspicious, and bends to grab it.

It’s a note from Neji, penned in his neat, stylish handwriting. Sasuke wishes he was surprised that the other man managed to slip a note in his pocket — and keep it from being ruined and illegible by the time he found it—without him noticing, but he’s not.

 _Careful, Soldier._ It reads. _Dark Red._

Fuck.

_Dream of rust and northern lights._

Sasuke frowns. Of course the other man would be vague about what he saw. It’s always been nearly impossible to get a straight answer of it him. But, on the other hand, it’s probably a helpful hint but he can’t put his finger on it right now.

He sits back down on the bed, folding up the note and placing it under his pillow, jumping slightly as he feels the ship begin to take off.

He stares out of his tiny window, watching the swaying streetlights and talking neon signs slowly fade from view. He lays back on the bed, folding his arms over his chest. He stares at the ceiling until his eyes are too heavy to open anymore.

Dark Red, he thinks before he falls, Dark fucking Red.

This really won’t end well, will it?


	2. Jenga

 

* * *

 

 **Two.**

_Oh poor me, she fell beneath the wheels to help me up,_  
_Black Sea, the monster killed the melody you loved—_  
_Now I'm going places on my own._

— Esmerelda, Ben Howard

* * *

 

 

**A.**

His brother leaves with no fanfare.

 

A quiet departure, careful and methodical like Itachi’s always been.

 

They’re sitting at the dinner table. The sun’s just starting to hide behind the clouds and Sasuke’s basking in the spring of his fifteenth year. His voice has just started getting deeper and his mother smiles every time his voice cracks. His father tends to frown at it, for some reason. He’s a stern man; deep set eyes that look weary and worn even though the skin around them is artificial. Amazing, what technological advancement does, to make it seem like they age in a natural way. His father has worry lines and his mother’s hair greys around the roots.

 

They’re favored, high ranked for their kind, so they’ve been gifted with aspects of a normal life. That’s apparent, since the rarity of two children sit across from them instead of one.

 

“This will be my last day here.” Itachi announces, wiping his mouth with his napkin as he finishes eating. “I’m joining the rebels.”

 

A cube of steak becomes lodged in Sasuke’s throat in the most uncomfortable way, and his brother’s delicate hand thumps his back to help him pass it.

 

Mikoto’s red painted lips thin into a line in the sand, while Fugaku’s fork stops short inches from his mouth. Sasuke stares openly at the side of his brother’s face, once his throat is cleared, blinking past his shock, confusion, and slight awe. Itachi sends him a quiet, reassuring smile which completely juxtaposes his hard-set shoulders and sharp, cold eyes. The look in his eyes makes it twisted, wrong. Sasuke feels lost, like he missed something—maybe ages ago, when he was hardly paying attention. Why should he? Itachi’s always been a permanent fixture, like the ornate chandelier or the gnomes in the garden, so there was no reason to think that one day he wouldn’t... be there anymore.

 

 It frightens him, all at once.

 

He can’t go— No. Nonononono— certainly not to be a dissenter. Doesn’t he know that Sasuke needs him?

 

Fugaku places his fork on the side of his plate, bite uneaten, and sets his jaw.

 

Mikoto stares at tablecloth, tracing the patterns with her eyes, waiting on bated breath.

 

“You will not.” And that’s that.

 

Or it would be, if he was talking to Sasuke. If Sasuke tried such a thing, one word of denial from his father would have him settling back into his seat, defeated, and they would continue their dinner like normal. No one would speak of it again, and that would be that.

 

Because Sasuke is weak.

 

Itachi is not.

 

“I didn’t pose it like a question, father.” Itachi says resolutely, taller and broader and darker than Sasuke remembers. “So you won’t answer it as such. I’ve already arranged transport; It’s regretful, but you understand why we won’t be able to keep in touch.”

 

“Itachi, please— “ Mikoto starts desperately. It’s hopeless, she knows.  Of course she must try anyway. This is suicide, a death sentence, and soulless as they are, her love for her “sons” is real and tangible.

 

—Ah, the beginning of the end.

He’d forgotten how _black_ it tasted.

The end of all things.

 

Sasuke wishes he could fix his mouth to move, to say anything, but he’s a useless fool and he flinches and looks away from his mother’s pleading eyes as she silently begs for his help.

 

“Don’t, Mikoto,” Fugaku chides. “If he wishes to die a pointless death and abandoned this family, so be it.” 

 

His brother smiles bitterly, and it’s so ugly on his beautiful face. “You think of us as a family?” Itachi says with a near laugh. “We’ve been assigned to you, because you both do such a _good job_ spying on your own kind and sending them to slaughter. Favored pets that got a set of their own to play house with, nothing more.”

 

Sasuke jerks, hurt, and he bites back something hateful when he sees his mother do the same. Fugaku simply narrows his eyes at him but stays silent.

 

Sasuke swallows. Throat dry and eyes itching. He has to look away from his— from Itachi, since that cut him deeper than he’d like to admit. He seems foreign now, distant and far away. He doesn’t even think of them as brothers, he doesn’t even—

 

He’s not going to cry, he’s not!

 

“Fine. Leave. Never come back. No matter what happens, never come back here.” He father says angrily, and Sasuke hates him for it. They’re at least supposed to _try_ harder than this. Even if they knew that one day Itachi— strong, smart, otherworldly Itachi— the jewel of their district, of their _kind_ — would one day be lost to the wind, it wasn’t supposed to be so soon. He was already bigger than here, bigger than this, too big to be contained in a box of unwilling servitude. But in the end, he was supposed to theirs, no matter what.

 

Itachi nods solemnly. That was the plan, wasn’t it? He doesn’t have to say for them to know.

 

—say something, idiot!

You’re just going to let him go?!

“I’ll take my leave, then.”

 

And he does.

 

He stands and strides out, proudly, and doesn’t look back.

 

Sasuke catches him  two blocks away, cement feet finally finding the strength to move. He feels like he just might combust on the spot but he manages to grunt out a tortured “Why!?” to his brother’s suddenly hazy back. He blinks rapidly, trying to clear his eyes but it isn’t working.

 

Itachi stops, sighs, and turns. This time, the sad smile on his face matches the look in his eyes, and it breaks Sasuke heart. Two warm hands encase his face, squishing them together like he used to when they were younger. He feels….he’s not sure how he feels.

 

Awful maybe? Torn?

 

He wants to go with him. He doesn’t want him to leave. He doesn’t want any of them to be separated.

 

But when has Sasuke ever gotten what he wants?

 

“Forgive me, Sasuke.” he says softly. “One day you’ll understand.” He won’t. “One day you’ll want to live and you’ll do anything for the chance.”

 

That doesn’t make any sense!

 

They’re alive right now aren’t they? Watching the sun set on the threads that tie them together? Aren’t they?!

 

“Do you—did you—Let me—” He says, floundering. He’s never been any good at this. He’s not even sure what he wants to ask.

 

“I didn’t. You know I didn’t. And you can’t. Not this time.” Itachi says. He’s always known Sasuke better than himself. Always.

 

Sasuke can’t be sure if it’s a lie. He knows nothing. But he’ll take it, and hold on to the hope that he means it.

 

He wants to tell him he cares. That he loves him. That even if Itachi’s lying—even if he just sees them all as strangers forced into close quarters, living like pretty paper dolls—that it meant something to Sasuke, their short time together. That he’ll cherish it for the rest of the time he’s here.

 

But he doesn’t.

 

And he won’t.

 

Long after Itachi’s outline has faded, Sasuke stares in the direction he’s gone. He thinks of waiting there forever, rooted to the spot, until he rots. Maybe he’ll catch sight of him again, coming back up the hill. Maybe it was a mistake, a bad joke gone a bit too far. But vines creep, carrying away his grief and ushering in the bitterness—

 

So he turns and walks back to the house.

 

 

 

**B.**

Sasuke feels his toes curl in his boots, snapping back to attention.

 

He has the urge to rub his temples but stands stiff and straight, shoulder to shoulder with the others outside of their temporary new home.

 

He’s irritated. Why did he dream about _that_? He’d slept like a rock for the majority of the week and of course he’d have old horrors crawl into his subconscious right before they landed.  The memory is almost as old as he was when it occurred, and thoughts of it have long passed, buried in a deep hole of his own making.

 

It’s far from rust and lights. and isn’t helpful at all in this situation, so he hates to think of it after all this time. It must be the stress and confusion that’s got his mind jumbled and vulnerable—

 

Yes, that must be it.

 

He yawns before he can catch it, and Mitsuki catches him from the corner of his eye.

 

“Sleepy, Uchiha?” He mocks under his breath. “Do robots dream of electric sheep?”

 

“Fuck you.” He hisses instantly, without thinking, internally grimacing when multiple sets of eyes snap to look at him, surprised.

 

 _Dark red_. Neji’s voice warns in the back of his mind.

 

Shit. Maybe his dream last night rattled him more than he thought.

 

He’s got to be careful. He can’t start acting out now.

 

Mitsuki looks like he wants to say something, but he thinks better of it as the dust around them begins to rise into a restless fog. They snap their eyes up in tandem, watching the passenger ship do a neat little spin in the air before landing with a pulse and a groan on the ground.

 

Ah yes, did he forget to mention? Genma sure did, until the last minute, that they’d be partnered with some locals on this pleasant excursion. Better for tracking, he says, but Sasuke’s pretty sure that they are here to keep an eye on his ragtag group of misfits. Even if they’re considered to be some the best they’re still second-class, he thinks bitterly, and their commanding officers seem keen on not letting them forget it. He was foolish to think that they’d send only two handlers for the four of them. Especially since Suigetsu's readings were marred with more color than they should ever have.

 

With only dimwits like Mitsuki and Genma watching them, it would have been easy enough to give them the slip or simply slit their throats when their guards were down. Not that Sasuke wants it to go that far, since he naively thinks there’s a solution to this mess that leads to as little bloodshed as possible, but at the end of the day it’s always an option.

 

Danzo accounted for this, of course, and even if he doesn’t know the extent of Sasuke’s connection, he knows that any one of them would jump at the chance of freedom hidden in the sprawling hills of Delta-1.

 

A smart man, he is.

 

The minute the leader of this new vessel steps off the ship, Sasuke knows he cannot be trusted.

 

Not that he’d trust a human period, but the feeling is so strong with the first look at him that it makes Sasuke jerk in surprise.

 

Tall, white hair, with a warm, winning smile. Wars have been fought and won on his face alone, if the scars are anything to go by, but it does nothing to diminish his good looks. His aura is...friendly, almost. Like someone you could confide your deepest darkest secrets after only knowing him a single afternoon.

 

—His eyes are dead.

Mismatched, cracked marble,

Deep-set, hooded,

And **dead.**

 

“Who’s this asshole?” Suigetsu mutters under his breath, bristling like a porcupine beside him. Juugo stands up a little straighter on his other side and even the spacey Karin shifts her feet into a more defensive stance.

 

Ah. So they noticed as well.

 

Interesting.

 

At their hesitation, the smile only slides wider.

 

“Commander Kakashi,” Genma starts, pulling out his best diplomatic voice from god knows where, “It’s good to see you again.”

 

“Likewise, Genma. It’s been ages!” Kakashi replies in a sing-song voice that makes Sasuke immediately despise him. “Your puppies don’t seem to like me though. They’ve gone all tense.”

 

Yes, he definitely hates him.

 

Mitsuki waves his hand dismissively. “They’re always like that.”

 

There are others that follow behind him from the ship. Twins—Sakon and Ukon— that move like one and have eerie, cold stares. Jirobo, a large, hulking man with a stern face and set frown. Underneath that, he looks like he’d break the easiest out of the lot. There’s also a girl with hair obscuring most of her face; the one visible eye seems trained on Sasuke with an uncomfortable amount of intensity. Tayuya, Sasuke learns, after Kakashi finishes introducing them. Not that he cared to know.

 

There’s an awkward silence that follows, like no one is sure what to do next. Kakashi rolls his eyes and gives a tight smile.

 

“C’mon. Introduce yourselves. To break the ice.” Suigetsu snorts, but does it anyway. They go down the line until it’s only Sasuke left.  He feels uncomfortable being stared out so he grunts out a quick greeting and goes back to looking at the landscape that’s set behind their heads.

 “Good, good.” He says, clapping his hands. “Now that we all know each other, let’s get down to business.”

 

That’s Sasuke’s cue to let his mind wander, The dossiers told them enough on the way over: they have _nothing_. No traces, no real hints, no obvious line of bread crumbs that lead up the stairs and to the right, taking them to the rebels.

 

Ghosts in the wind they are, hitting quick and hitting hard and worst of all, making waves. Sasuke can taste the fear of the humans around him, tittering nervously with fingers permanently poised above the triggers of their guns. He wonders how they picture them—like boogeymen, tall and black with spindly limbs? Or like huge, hulking beasts? With visible breath  
and bulging muscles, ready to tear the heads off any foe that dares come their way?

 

Or does it scare them the most to know that the enemy looks like them? That they could be anywhere and can blend in seamlessly with the same society they want to destroy?

 

A question he won’t dare ask.

 

The others are paying rapt attention, so he’ll just ask to be caught up on whatever was said by Juugo later. He’s too busy taking in the sights around him.

 

Delta-1 is much larger than he could have imagined. None of the descriptions ever did it justice. It’s roughly the size of North America, and one of the oldest and prosperous colonies near Jupiter. It’s warmer than he thought, despite its distance from the sun, and he feels sweat building up around his neck under his morphsuit.

 

It doesn’t matter to him how long they have to stick around, since the landscape is breathtaking. Rolling hills and flat plains, lush green, yellowed in some places from the daisy patches. As they were landing, he saw countless lakes and islands littered along the coast. It’s truly a marvel, how earth-like this place looks, when they’re basically standing on an overgrown space station.

 

Even more impressive still that it’s all man made instead of one large projection. The grass is real and bows under his weight, while the distant mountains can actually be reached and conquered. There’s so much to take in, to see, to explore. But that’s not what they’re here for.

 

It’d be nice though, once this is all over, if he just got the chance to look around. If he’s even still standing.

 

“Sasuke?” Juugo calls softly from beside him, pulling him from his thoughts. .

 

“Hm?” He hums absently. “ Have I missed something?”

 

Juugo shrugs with one shoulder. “Not much. We’ve heard it all before.” He figured. “The commander and the others have already gone inside.  He wants us to meet in the common area though, since he’s plans for us to “play” a few games together so we can all get to know each other better.”

 

At Sasuke’s confused blink, Juugo smiles slightly, shrugs again, and turns on his heel to enter the facility.

 

Sasuke stares at his back, bewildered, and follows him inside.

 

The facility is similar to the ones back of earth; big, white. boring. It’s almost disappointing to Sasuke and he doesn’t know why. Maybe his dreams of space travel and worlds unknown were a little too embellished when he was young, since he can find a veritable prison for his kind to be too bland.

 

It’s nearly barren, though, which isn’t as typical. He guesses there aren’t that many stationed out here, as opposed to the densely populated capital back home. Or maybe the higher ups cleared it out so that they could have a private space to work, since despite the casual air that’s been floating about, this mission is supposed to be classified.

 

The Model Two’s stare at him as he passes,  lifeless as ever, as he goes to catch up with the others. Some even cock their heads as he passes, almost too organic for his liking, like they’re sizing him up and forming an opinion.

 

Does Delta-1 allow the Two’s to have them? Opinions?

 

That’d be interesting, to say the least.

 

The commons is shaped like an octagon, filled with clear glass panes that reveal the scenic beauty outside. A nice change from grey brick and industrial piping. Everyone has gathered near the holographic fountain, muttering in low tones. Kakashi is nowhere to be seen, probably off to find those games he wants everyone to play.

 

What a weirdo.

 

Two groups, standing somewhat together but still obviously segregated. For some reason he couldn’t possibly explain, he hesitates as to which he should join. It makes no sense, to think he could stand by the humans, even if they are supposed to be working together. He dislikes the handlers he’s used to, and the four new soldiers watch him with thinly veiled disgust and misplaced distrust so even if he wanted to fraternize, their cold gazes keep him rooted to the spot. Instead, he takes his usual spot next to Juugo and catches on to the tail end of a heated, whispered conversation.

 

One of the twins,

he couldn’t possibly know which,

Almost looks...disappointed?

 

“This is fucking ridiculous.” Suigetsu moans. “We’re out here on a wild goose chase.”

 

“It’s better than the same boring beat we always do.“ Karin counters. “At least something will happen while we’re out here.”

 

“Yeah, maybe, but it'll probably be weeks before anything jumps off and now we have to look forward to that fucking creep breathing down our necks.”

 

“He is a bit strange.” Juugo adds.

 

“He’s dangerous for sure,” Karin says, like she’s remarking on the weather. “But also a little fun? I don’t know, it’s weird. What do you think, Sasuke?”

 

Kakashi seems like he’s too smart and he’s going to be a problem. He might need to be removed if this operation is going to go smoothly. Something’s also niggling in the back of his brain, like a whisper or unidentifiable itch that’s telling him that man knows more than he’s saying. About what, Sasuke’s not exactly sure.

 

Sasuke thinks all of this in rapid fire succession, but he’s smart enough not to say it aloud.

 

“I don’t like him.” He says instead.

 

Suigetsu grins wolfishly. “Finally, something we can agree on.”

 

**C.**

 

Suigetsu's right; it’s weeks before anything happens.

 

The lot of them spend time going over security footage of the previous attacks, station history, anything they can get their hands on to figure out the rebels’ next move. Sasuke's heart starts to adjust to the sight of familiar faces again, using this opportunity to pretend like he’s studying their profiles to better identify them. In a way, he is, since he missed out a sizable chunk of their lives and can’t help but be curious about what they’ve been up to without him.

 

Besides the obvious, of course. 

 

He discovers that Lee and Choji were assigned to be builders, developers of this developing world. Because of that, they had fairly high level clearance since it allowed them to make any necessary repairs or alterations to government buildings and shipyards alike. That’s most likely how they are able to pull off such elaborate and nearly impossible attacks on places with high security. Their key-cards would have been deactivated once it was discovered that they defected, but it would make no difference since Shikamaru and Shino are— _were_ — analysts, and they could easily hack into the system to give themselves infinite and undetectable clearance. Kiba worked as roving security, going wherever he was needed. He’d know shift changes, floorplans, gave them access to weapons—the works.

 

An efficient team, if he doesn’t say so himself. He can’t be sure how long they’d been planning this; it could have been months, or from the moment they landed here years ago, but how fortuitous for them: to be placed in these advantageous positions by the very people they seek to destroy.

 

Sakura, Tenten, and Ino’s connections are looser, less obvious. A receptionist, a general shopkeeper, a ...pleasure bot. He has to close his eyes at that one, letting the red-hot anger pass in slow waves as he breathes out of his nose. He’s bitter, since such a bright, rambunctious girl like Ino deserved better than to be used as a disposable hole to some dirty politicians. He’s bitter for all of them, since the women has their talents wasted and got placed in low-impact roles to better serve the humans around them.

 

Who had it worse—the men, given  a semblance of power that ultimately meant nothing? They’d created marvels, high-rise luxury offices and homes on this beautiful vista while they no doubt returned to hovels day after day and got paid pennies for their troubles. They protected the fools that lived in them, corrected their figures and stored their secrets—cogs in the machine that would fall apart without them, yet to those they served they remained nameless?

 

Or the women? Beautiful and mighty, yet used and abused, stripped of their agency and their clothes, left to rot inside their own skin as they were forced to smile and _take it_ by those that no doubt enjoyed abusing them since they knew they wouldn’t fight back?

 

That’s not something he can easily answer.

 

He continues his search, reading all their records. Even though they haven’t figured out that Naruto is their leader just yet, he looks into his files because he can’t help himself. He hesitates, scared he’ll find something else he doesn’t like, some quite horror that his friend had to live through, but goes through with it.

 

He can’t find much, which surprises him. The last mention of him was seven years ago, doing farm work. Sasuke can’t help the snort that leaves him once he finds this out. Naruto? A farmer? He must have hated it. Sasuke can just imagine him with a straw hat and overalls, toiling away in a large field, and it almost makes him laugh out loud. He catches himself, since the others are nearby at other terminals going over files like he is, and they’ll probably be curious to know why he’s laughing at a random farmer on his screen.

 

It also disappoints him, since, while he imagined him working with his hands, he thought he’d be a builder like Lee or Choji. Maybe even a bodyguard like Kiba. He didn’t think he’d work with tech, though. It’s not that he’s an idiot per say, but Sasuke wouldn’t trust him with state secrets to be honest. Naruto was always the most vocal out of all of them, so most likely he got placed as a farmer as punishment, in isolation. Clearly, it didn’t last long, since there’s years that he was unaccounted for, only showing up recently to bomb the living daylights out of government controlled airyards. 

 

That’s more his speed anyway, if Sasuke’s honest.

 

“Find anything interesting?” Kakashi says over his shoulder. Sasuke starts, pressing a key on his terminal so hard it almost breaks. He didn’t noticed him at all, which is strange. He’s always aware of humans in his vicinity and he can almost always hear them coming.

 

Karin jumps as well a little ways away from him and they share a concerned look; she hadn’t noticed him either. Sasuke’s not sure what to make of that.

 

Shit, how long has he been here?

 

It’s fine, it’s fine. He wasn’t doing anything wrong, just reading basic files and making notes about points of interest. There’s nothing incriminating about his search history so there’s nothing to worry about it.

 

Right?

Sasuke turn in his seat to regard him, trying to keep steady eye contact even though the other man’s stare is unnerving.

 

“Not much.” He says honestly. “Nothing in the suspect’s files reveal any glaring motivations, but I’ll keep looking.”

 

Kakashi nods absently, considering him.

 

“From what I gather, they all came from the same city on earth.” He says matter-of-factly. “Maybe you’re familiar with it, since it’s near where you grew up, isn’t it?”

 

Shit.

 

Sasuke blinks, swallowing down a dismissive retort that would probably hurt him more than it’d help him.

 

(He can’t know. Sasuke’s files are sealed. Buried. Burned. After Itachi, after his friends were shipped off, his father saw to that. A fresh start, he said, or maybe he knew those threads would come back to bite him in the ass if they stayed the way they were. Whoever he knew, hung out with, went to school with, _survived the flood with_ , disappeared with some expert keystrokes. He wouldn’t have gotten this far if there were whispers on the wind that he used to have dinner with the rebel leader on smoggy saturday nights. Of that he’s certain.)

—Still,

His fingers twitch in defensiveness,

And he considers…

 

Nothing. He considers nothing.

 

“It is.” He says easily. “Some of them had some of the same haunts as well. The Capital wasn’t very big and I do remember a few of them. In passing.” It’s not exactly the truth, but it sounds better than an outright lie.

 

Kakashi raises an eyebrow and nods to himself. “Really? I’ve only been on Earth a few times and to the capital even less, so I couldn’t say how big it is. That’s interesting, isn’t it? It’s such a small world.”

 

“Hn.” Sasuke hums noncommittally, turning back to his screen. The conversation seems casual almost, but he’d be foolish to believe it was only that. This is the first time that Kakashi addressed him directly over the past few weeks, and it sets him on edge. The line of questioning isn’t helping, either, and Sasuke can’t help but think that the commander asked him that just to see how he’d react. If he’d panic, or scramble for a lie. Since his answer was immediate he thinks he may have passed some sort of test.

 

Kakashi doesn’t leave, though; he watches him over his shoulder as he clicks through classified information. He schools his face, keeping it as blank as possible while the other man is watching him. He can feel eyes on his back and knows that Kakashi isn’t watching the screen like he is, finding the back of his head infinitely more fascinating.

 

Great.

 

“You know, I think that’s the most I’ve heard you talk since you’ve arrived.” Kakashi remarks after a while in the uneasy silence. Sasuke can see the others watching them from the corner of his eye, each with questions in their eyes and comments that have died on their tongues. Part of him wants one of them to say something. Anything. Maybe then he’d be free from the dual-colored scrutiny that he’s being subjected to.

 

On the other hand, he wants to keep the attention on him, because it’s a reminder not to fuck up with something stupid, like the almost-laugh from earlier or his bad habit of daydreaming on the job.

 

When Sasuke doesn’t respond, Kakashi leans a little closer, placing a long hand on his shoulder in an almost bruising grip. Sasuke surprised by the force of it. He tenses, feeling warm breath against his ear that raises his hackles.

 

“You know, they say the quiet ones are the ones you have to look out for.” He says calmly. Darkly. “Do I need to look out of you, Sasuke?” He asks.

 

Fingernails dig into his skin. They have no hope of breaking it, but the intention is there and that says enough.

 

“No sir, I don’t think that you do.” Sasuke says, once he forces his tongue to work. The steady _click, click_ has stopped around him—it was senseless background noise that he was barely aware of, but now it’s absence is glaringly obvious. He doesn’t have to look at he others to know that they’ve stopped what they’re doing. He makes sure not to, worried what might happen if he does. He can feel their tense uncertainty from where he sits. “Is there a reason why you’d think you need to?”

 

Tell him his tell.

 

So he can destroy it..

 

Just like that, the tension breaks, as quickly as it came, leaving Sasuke reeling. Kakashi leans back, releasing his shoulder finger by finger.

 

“No reason! Maybe you remind me of someone.” He says, no trace of the storm that colored his throat the moment before. Sasuke’s confused and a little frightened if he’s honest. He’s never seen such a mood switch at the drop of a hat. Such unwarranted anger at that, melting back into his over-the-top cheerfulness like a light switch.

 

He can’t help but ask, “Oh? Who?” Because there’s a strange feeling in his chest that he’s never felt before.

 

“It’s not important!” Kakashi says with a dismissive wave of his hand. “Just remember soldier: no one raindrop think it caused the flood. Be mindful of that in these trying times, alright?” He doesn’t wait for an answer, instead he turns on his heel and exit the room as quietly as he came.

 

Sasuke watches him go, blinking in his wake.

 

He has no idea what just happened.

 

“What the fuck was that?” Suigetsu nearly explodes from his seat, waiting a beat after his departure to ensure he’s out of earshot.

 

“I wish I knew.” Sasuke says, trying to hide the fact that he’s a little rattled. He doesn’t think it works all that well, but he tries.

 

“He was obviously threatening you.” Karin says, staring at the now-closed door. “Which isn’t new when it comes to humans. But did you see how he just...shut it off like that? Scary.”

 

“That’s because it was an act.” Juugo adds quietly, standing over Sasuke’s sit seated form almost defensively. “Which personality, I’m not sure.”

 

“Well remind me to steer the fuck clear.” Suigetsu says, disgust coloring his tone. “If he’s that suspicious of golden boy over here the rest of us don’t stand a chance.”

 

Sasuke wants to correct him, since Suigetsu was just a suspicious of him a few odd weeks ago and knows he isn’t as “golden” as they all like to make him seem, but they’re interrupted when one of the twins appears of the other side of the glass door. The all stand to attention, ready for a possible threat, but the present twin just looks at them oddly and clears his throat awkwardly.

 

“Sorry to interrupt.” He says. “But we have orders to move out.”

 

“What?” Karin asks. “Right now?”

 

“Yeah. The commander sent me to tell you since he says he forgot to while he was in here.”

 

They all blink at him and Sakon sighs.

 

“I know. He’s like that, sometimes. Follow me.”

 

They follow him down the corridor, asking questions while they walk. Sasuke can tell that Suigetsu immediately forgets his prior ire in the face of some long awaited action. Juugo still looks pensive, and Karin’s a mix between the two.

 

“Where are we going?” Karin asks, eyes alight.

 

“North.” Sakon says blandly. “Some old fishing town, I think.” Sasuke feels himself tense, but he’s walking towards the back so no one notices.

 

It must be important, since it’s getting late. Usually they don’t move around much at night, since the human’s senses aren’t as good as theirs and since they aren’t as familiar with the area.

 

“Do you know why?” Suigetsu questions, sounding irritated. He probably wants to know if this will end up in a firefight or if they’re just chasing ghosts.

 

“We’ve been contacted by one of the rebels.” Kakashi answers for him from the end of the hallway. They stop short, shocked, and the smile he gives them is as empty as the gathering shadows. “He says he’s willing to give us information about the others if we cut him a deal.”

 

Sasuke feels his eyebrows rise to his hairline. His heartbeat thunders in his chest as he racks his brain to figure out who could possibly be the traitor. Why now, while Sasuke’s still trapped here and has no hope of reaching him first? Why at all, since there’s no way the humans will let him live even if he tells them everything? Doesn’t the mystery man know this is a death sentence for them all?

 

 

—Who?!

His mind screams.

Who’s the killer in the crowd?

 

Tayuya, Jirobo and Ukon appear with Genma and Mitsuki, checking their weapons. They all have the same look in their eyes. Ready. Wound-tight and itching for blood.

 

“It could be a trap.” Juugo says quietly, more to Sasuke than anyone else, but the others hear anyway.

 

“It’s almost certainly a trap.” Kakashi parrots cheerfully. “That’s the best part.”

 


	3. Re:

 

* * *

 

**Three.**

 

_When we were young,_

_We used to live so close to it,_  
_And we were scared and we were beautiful._

—Realiti, Grimes

 

* * *

 A.

 

It was the closest they would ever get to a field trip, he guesses.

 

The trip to the training yard as a class.

 

Alpha Class didn’t need things like this, since they were the best of the lot. No one ever doubted their abilities or the brightness of their futures. The lesser classes would be taken to jails, to the mines, to the scrapyards, to be shown visual threats of where they would end up if they didn’t measure up. This was the opposite of that, an incentive more than anything. Their instructors thought it would be a good idea to get them out into the open air and show them goals they could aspire to, once they graduated next year.

 

What a joke.

 

Who wants to finish their studies and then immediately beginning training to teach the next generation? Or become a run-of-the-mill soldier? What a tired, boring ouroboros of endless monotony. Sasuke would rather teach the next batch how to load a gun and fire it into their own mouths to save them from a cycle of complacency.  

 

Iruka claps his hands to get the tittering group of teenagers attention as they talk among themselves, signaling that it’s time to board the ship..

 

—Their teacher had dreams of rebellion,

Once.

The scar across his face tells a story.

He sleeps like a rock. 

 

“Ten bucks says Sasuke’s the only one lame enough to become a teacher.” Kiba quips from the seat behind him.

 

Sasuke turns bodily in his seat, incensed, because—”Fuck you, as if I would.”

 

Neji laughs from his place beside him. “If we’re basing it off personalities then you’ll be shoveling manure, Kiba.” He jests. At Kiba’s offended squawk, Shikamaru adds: “Besides, that means Naruto would be one too, since they’re attached at the hip. And there’s no one stupid enough to let Naruto be someone’s teacher.”

 

That gets a round of laughter out of the lot of them and Naruto can only suck his teeth. He can’t really deny either part, but he’ll try anyway.

 

He’s flung across the back of his seat, arms swinging, finger tips almost touching Sasuke’s knees. Every ship they ride, that’s how he sits. They never sit together even though everyone expects them to; Naruto has to have half-ass flirting attempts with Sakura (which she’ll reject with an eye roll and shove) and Sasuke prefers Neji’s acknowledgement of personal space and interesting form of gossip to Naruto’s spastic hand movements and loud voice right in his ear. Not that he’d tell either of them that, since Neji likes to gloat and Naruto holds grudges for the tiniest of reasons.

 

“Oh, like you’d do any better, Shika. You’d fall asleep standing up while trying to teach.” Naruto counters, Shikamaru can’t argue with that, either.

 

“I think we’ll all be good at whatever we end up doing, guys.” Ino adds diplomatically, trying to keep the peace. TenTen nods in agreement. It’s all lighthearted jesting, anyway, and she knows it. “We’re Alpha Class, after all.”

 

“God, you sound like a fucking motivational poster.” Sakura says around a laugh. Ino flips her the middle finger, smiling all the same, and Iruka turns around from the front of the ship.

 

“Language!” He chides out of habit. They’ve had the worst mouths for years but he still tries to rein them in every once in a while.

 

“Sorry, Sensei!” They say in unison. Sasuke sees the tail end of an eye roll as Iruka turns back around, but there’s a small smile on his face, too.

 

“Seriously, though,” Choji chimes in, leaning out into the isle to grab everyone’s attention. “Do you guys think we’ll be stationed together? Maybe not all of us, but at least a few? I’d hate for us to get separated.”

 

“That’s pretty gay of you, man.” Kiba says snarkily, causing Ino to elbow him in the chest.

 

“It’s a little unlikely, I think.” Shikamaru admits, causing them all to sober up. It’s something they’ve all thought about, sure, but it doesn’t make it any easier. Sasuke doesn’t like to think that the same “people” he’s seen for years and years would just suddenly be...gone. Scattered to the wind.

 

Even though he learned to live with it. With the empty room at the end of the hall. The one his mother tidies up, just in case. The one his father sits in quietly when he thinks no one’s looking. The one he likes to pretend was empty all along.

 

“Hey, hey! None of that!” Naruto cries, waving his hands wildly. Sasuke jerks from his thoughts as one of his hands catches his shoulder. They make eye contact in that moment, and Sasuke knows he did it on purpose. To keep Sasuke from thinking about things he shouldn’t.

 

He silently thanks him.

 

There’s understanding between the two of them that unrivaled by anyone else on this ship and even outside of it. Something meaningful and tangible and strong that he can almost name, but not quite. Or, he knows its name, but has always been too afraid to speak the words aloud. Because he’s weak.

 

Naruto is not.

 

And he’d have the strength to disagree.

 

“There’s no guarantee that we’re going to be split up so don’t worry about it so much. We’ve still got a year left, anyway; plenty of time for us all to get sick of each other and then maybe we’ll be begging to get away.” he jokes. That cracks a few stone faces, but Sasuke can’t help but be wary still, even with Naruto’s smiling face in front of him and Neji’s warmth beside him. A year, and then everything will change.

 

He’s never wished for time to stop—maybe for it to rewind, or slow down a bit, but never stop—but he just might start.

 

When they deboard, the mood’s different from when they first set out; muted, wary, even a little afraid. Iruka looks at them with concern. He most likely heard their conversation and knows why they’ve deflated, but he just sighs and beckons them to the welcome area in uneasy silence.

 

A Model Four greets them, perky and perfect and perfectly annoying in the face of their new-found grief.

 

“Any questions?” she asks, after she finishes her well-rehearsed spiel. Kiba’s hand is the only one that goes up, so she has no choice to call on him.

 

“Yeah, when can we leave?” He asks cheekily, the face of innocence. Sasuke smothers a snort in his fist as Iruka chews him out.

 

“We’re here for the tour, Kiba.” Iruka says pointedly. “And we’ll stay until it’s done.”

 

They would all groan like the children they are, but they are aware of the eyes on them. They won’t embarrass Iruka too much, like he can’t control them. It would reflect badly on the man and they wouldn’t want to be the cause of anything...unfortunate befalling him because they slipped up and forget themselves.

 

Perfected Beings.

 

Useful Units.

 

Instead of just a bunch of teens on a trip out from school. So they nod dutifully and follow behind their guide, single-file. Sasuke’s sick of this thin line they walk, but it will only narrow from here.

 

 Near the end of it, they’re standing by the practice fields, watching some of the soldiers go through obstacles and spar lightly with each other. Sasuke’s terribly bored with it all, and he’s taken to tapping out Morse code on his pant leg under the cover to the adults chattering. Neji’s responses are humorous, as well as Shikamaru’s, but he’s perfected his poker face well enough that no one notices when he’s biting down laughter. He knows that Naruto knows what they’re doing, but the golden haired boy can’t really participate since he never had a good grasp on it. He bumps Sasuke’s shoulder and makes of show of pouting since he’s being left out. It makes Sasuke want to laugh even more, but he refrains.

 

One of the soldiers comes over to speak with them at their guide’s beckoning, tall like a tree and built like an ox. Sasuke doesn’t like having to look up at others, since he’s already fairly tall himself. It strangely intimidates him. The man has an easy smile but his eyes are wrong. His peers’ eyes all have light in them, full of hope for the future and enjoyment for their lives as they are now. But this man? It’s been beaten out of him. Dimmed. He’s hollow, and Sasuke can tell. Just another pair of combat boots and a nametag. It makes him sick.

 

The tour guide backs up to give the big man a little space, hopping backwards in a happy little gait.

 

The well-hidden IED in the grass almost takes her right side clean off, up to the shoulder.

 

Sasuke stares, breath leaving him in a thundering rush.

 

She doesn’t go down right away; hovering in the air on her one good leg. Shock colors her face. Ashen grey.  One blink. Two blinks. Three. The exposed wire leaks red, then sparks, and she goes to say something but all that comes out is a garbled choke.

 

He’s not sure who screams first. Maybe Ino, or Sakura. He barely hears it anyway, not over Kiba’s alarmed shout and Iruka’s panicked gasp. Neji’s hand is frozen next to his leg; whatever he was going to say next in their secret speech is lost forever.

 

The soldier they were speaking to whips around, barking out orders to the others that are frozen a little ways away on the practice field. He gets three sentences out before he’s taking two bullets to the chest, ripping him open like he was made of paper instead of metal. He goes down heavy, facedown, and Sasuke doesn’t wait to see if he’ll get back up again.

 

He locks eyes with Naruto beside him, blue eyes wide and full of horror, and takes his hand right as the first fireball drops from the sky onto one of the buildings behind them.

 

Iruka’s yelling something, pulling the girls backward so they can all get out of the open. Gunfire erupts. The soldiers start shooting at some unseen force through the smoke.

 

Run.

 

That’s all Sasuke can think as he drags Naruto behind him. They head for the woods, away from it all, towards the west. He can’t bring himself to turn and look, but he senses Choji and Shikamaru behind him. Their breaths are just as labored, even though a few minutes of running couldn’t come close to tiring them out. They’re almost passed the treeline, to safe obscurity, when the second fireball drops right in front of them.

 

His head hits the ground, and it only feels like one minute to the next when wakes, nearly delirious.  

 

He’s in the forest but it feels like a jungle; tall trees twist above him with all their leaves burned off. He’s waist-deep in the murky waters that threaten to pull him under. The air is thick and he’s bleeding from a cut over his eye. He’d scream for help, but his throat burns and his eyes search the tree line desperately, swallowing down his panic as he tries to figure out when he got separated from everyone else. From Naruto. They’re nowhere to be seen.

 

Shit, how long was he out?

 

He can’t hear the gunfire anymore, but smoke still rises around him. He doesn’t know what to think. The others….the others were close enough to him that they only should have been blasted only a little ways away from him….unless…..

 

No, no. He was in the front. If anyone was in pieces, it would have been him. He wades through the water until he finds a lump, diving down until he can pull it up. Choji’s head lolls limply when it comes above water, making his throat go dry. He lays him down on the solid earth and thumps on his chest in a blind panic until he coughs up water and his eyelids flutter. Alive. Good.

 

He crawls further onto the dry land, keeping his head low in case there’s still enemies afoot. if he focuses, stops letting his mind jump to the worst possible scenario, he can see through the smoke with his advanced vision. Shikamaru’s about two meters away, pressed up against a fallen tree. His eyes are open, scanning their surroundings as well, and his breath is audible when they land on Sasuke. The nod to each other, and Sasuke notes the nasty wound on his shoulder. Not fatal, at least. Good, good.

 

A hand snakes out from the smoke, grabbing Sasuke’s bicep in the death grip.

 

He stops himself just short of giving a shout, raising his free arm to defend himself, but deflates all at once when his eyes fall on Naruto.

 

“What the fuck, you idiot!” He hisses. “Don’t grab me like that!”

 

“Sorry, sorry!” Naruto whispers back sheepishly. “I just woke up and I didn’t know where I was. I kinda saw your outline moving.”

 

Sasuke’s anger dissipates just as quickly as it came, relieved to see that his friend is alright. He scans over him and while he’s got a few cuts and scrapes, Naruto’s pretty much no worse for the wear.

 

A tanned palm gently swipes at his still bleeding cut.

 

“Shit, Sasuke! Your eye!” He cries, alarmed.

 

“It’s ok. It’s above it. I can still see.”

 

“Guys!” Shikamaru calls. “Someone’s coming!”

 

They all tense.

 

They can’t defend themselves, with Choji out cold and Shikamaru hurt. Both Sasuke and Naruto can only see if they focus hard, and that’s difficult given the situation. Sasuke swallows a lump in his throat and shares a look with his best friend.

 

They’re going to die.

 

Together, at least, which counts for something. Their assailants have the upper hand—weapons, years of training and hunting—and all they have is the sweat pooled between their palms as they hold hands one last time.

 

He wants to say something meaningful, something profound, something heartbreaking. But his mouth won’t move as he stares into his friends eyes. He hopes the look they share will say enough.

 

“There they are!” Neji calls, and Sasuke feels immeasurable relief.

 

It’s a blur, afterwards. Iruka hugs them all one by one for what would be considered socially unacceptably long on a regular day. Sasuke allows it, from him and his other classmates because he grips them back just as tight.

 

They’re led back, past the piles of bodies. Iruka warns them not to look but they can’t help it. So many, from either side. He hears Shikamaru inquire as to what happened here, since it was so sudden and they didn’t have time to figure it out before.

 

“Fucking Rebels.” One of the soldier escorts replies gruffly. “Of all the days they could have picked…” He trails off, giving them all a minor look of pity.

 

“Some things kids just shouldn’t see.” Another remarks. Sasuke almost wants to laugh. Kids? Since when? They’re built, just like them, right? Greater still, they’re already 17 and will see things like this in spades in just one short year, if they get matched for this kind of work.

 

He catches the eye of their Model Four guide, laying in a pool of her own blood where she fell. It seemed like hours ago. She’s twitching, mouth parted in senseless agony. The medic’s face leaning over her says it all, and Sasuke feels the tell-tale lurch of vomit pull at his stomach. Her eyes search his, once, twice, and then she closes them.

 

He decides to stare forward after that.

 

Everyone does.

 

Once they’re treated and back on the ship, it’s dead silent. No one says a word. Naruto’s face forward in his seat so Sakura’s head can lean on his shoulder. Neji has his head pressed against the back of theirs, eyes closed, and his hand covers Sasuke’s.

 

Sasuke blinks, and next thing he knows, they’re back at school in the Capitol. He would have never though it possible that they could go a whole half day without speaking again, but everyone is eerily silent until they’re dismissed.  

 

Not safe. This place isn't safe anymore. Their easy normalcy disrupted at the drop of a hat. They were naive to the truths of this world for far too long and the sin of their creation burns in their eyelids.

 

War never changes. Even in their cushy, sheltered life they'll always see the effects of it. How easy to pretend the world isn't always full of chaos when you aren't on the front line.

 

He walks home with the boys, splitting at the fork like always, which leaves only him and Naruto. He walks him to his door and waits for him to go inside. Naruto doesn’t look back, like he usually does, calling back something playful or stupid with a wave and a wink. He marches right into the house and shuts the door.

 

Sasuke does the same, dropping his school bag in a heap in the foyer. He kicks off his shoes, ready to disappear into his room, but his mother is in the kitchen and his father’s in the den, watching news on the full wall TV and it tumbles by in a lazy scrawl. They hear him come in, looking up to greet him. His mother leans out, smiling her patented warm smile, decked out in her checkered apron. She’s holding a ladle, already starting dinner.

 

“Hi, sweetheart!” She chirps happily. “How was your trip?”

**B.**

The bar is heavy with smoke.

 

Sasuke’s sitting in the far corner, arms folded. Waiting. They’ve been waiting for over an hour and the mole hasn’t showed. Not that he wants them to. He wants to forget this whole thing, pretend it never happened, but he knows that they won’t be able to.

 

Even if the snitch doesn’t show, the others still need to know that there’s a traitor among them.

 

How he’d get that information to them, trapped as he is, he doesn’t know yet.

 

Arce, it’s called. The sleepy fishing town. Half-abandoned since most production is commercial now and government controlled. Right in the middle of Nowhere, away from the intrigue of big cities, streets littered with small shops and half faded murals. It seems like a throwback, like it came straight out of a western B movie. Sasuke kind of likes it, though. There’s something about old-world charm that’s always tickled his fancy.  

 

They arrived at about midday and there was barely a soul stirring. The few that were out and about stared at them as they passed, eyes wide, wondering why an obvious military faction—black suits, black boots, black expressions— are stomping single file down their quiet cobblestone streets. Kakashi waves at them, smiling bright, and Sasuke can’t help but cringe because he has to be seen with him.

 

He can’t believe that they’re just walking through town like it’s nothing. What happened to the classified subtlety that the humans have been touting this whole time? Does that all disappear because of who they’re about to meet?

 

“This can’t be the right place, can it?” Sakon asks, breaking the awkward silence that’s been following their group for days. “This place doesn’t even look like it has running water. How can the rebels be hiding out here?”

 

“That’s exactly why they’d be hiding out here.” Ukon answers since no one else will. “No one would think to look for idiots with plasma guns in a cannery.”

 

Sasuke couldn’t help but agree then and even more so now. When they asked around, most people seemed genuinely ignorant of anything going on here or elsewhere. They stayed to themselves and minded their own business. That’s a good way to stay alive, but it wasn’t exactly helpful in their search. The mole told them to meet here, but he or she could be anywhere. In the cracks of the abandoned buildings, in the overgrowth at the edge of town, in the faces of the villagers whose eyes followed their shadows for a few seconds too long. Hiding, watching.

 

Waiting for the perfect moment.

 

There wasn’t anything else to go on, and Sasuke wasn’t too keen on kicking in doors or interrogating little old ladies with pies on their window sills for answers.

 

It doesn’t come to that, since there was a crudely written flyer posted to a pole near the town square that mentions Kakashi. By name. If it wasn’t for Karin’s wandering eyes, they would have missed it.

 

“You can’t be serious.” Genma says, and Sasuke almost wants to roll his eyes at the sheer stupidity of this whole thing.

 

They end up at a dinky bar as their meeting place after changing into more casual clothes, bought at a corner store not too far from it.

 

Sasuke feels like an idiot, dressed as he is, but its better that the tactical morph suits they wear so they don’t scream COP! To everyone who happens to pass them by. Only four of them enter, while the others keep watch.  He feels eyes on him everywhere, but can’t place where they’re coming from. The whole thing feels off, wrong. But he doesn’t comment on it because he’s not exactly sure what he should say.

 

Suigetsu says it for him.

 

 “This is definitely a fucking trap.” He mumbles from Sasuke’s left. He takes a long swig of his beer and leans in closer. “I mean, this guy tells us to come to this random fucking dive in the middle of nowhere with only one exit, mind you, and were just supposed to go with it? Give me a break.”

 

“I thought you were supposed to be one of those ‘top-notch’ Synths?” Jirobo quietly mumbles from the right, subtly looking around for some unseen threat. “Can’t handle a little ambush?”

 

“Fuck you.” Suigetsu hisses, and Sasuke puts a calming hand on the other man’s bicep to keep him from launching across the table.

 

He’s barely paying attention to them since he’s trying not to vibrate out of his skin.

 

There’s no way out of this. That’s glaringly apparent to him. Maybe it should have been weeks ago, or when this whole thing started, so he feels stupid for hoping for the best when life has shown him time and time again that there’s no such thing.

 

Literally and figuratively, he’s trapped between two sides and the meeting will happen any minute.

 

Whoever it is, they’ll be surprised to see Sasuke, immediately outing him. Or, he’ll be forced to kill them before they can, which he’s not sure he can do. That’ll also be suspicious to Kakashi and the rest, and he’ll be taken down for ruining the operation. If he tries to leave now, no one will let him. If he tries to take out either of the human’s in the booth with him, there’s still the problem of the rest outside.

 

Every scenario, every possibility, every variable ends the same.

 

He’s fucked.

 

“Calm down, everyone.” Kakashi says into his propped fist, bored. “It’ll be any minute now.” Even though he seems calm and collected, Sasuke can tell that he’s on edge like the rest of them. He’s stiff and he’s been surveying their surroundings for a while now, not to mention the hard _tap, tap, tap_ of his nails on the wood of the wobbly table.

 

It was “any minute now” ten minutes ago, and twenty, and _forty-five_ —

 

The bell above the door chimes, hardly heard over the ambient chatter of the other occupants, but it commands Sasuke’s attention all the same. Somehow, he knows. Knows that this is who they are waiting for and he swallows thickly around the lump in his throat.

 

Kakashi sits up, eyes alight, and he angles his body towards the door.

 

“See?” He says sweetly, but there’s a hard edge underneath that’s hard to ignore.

 

Well, here goes. He says a silent goodbye to anyone who would care and stealthy reaches towards the gun he’s kept hidden in his waistband. Only Suigetsu notices this, raising an eyebrow at him and looking at him like he’s, dare he say, proud? The oddest things please the other man, but Sasuke doesn’t have time to mull over that now even if he cared to.

 

Sasuke starts with the feet and works his way up. Doing so feels like it will shock him less, somehow, but he knows that it will not. He does it anyway.

 

Long legs. Tanned skin, Male—

 

_Fuck._

 

Broad shoulders, small black tattoos dotting the arms—

 

Fuck!

 

Shit-eating grin, dark hair—

 

—Wait, dark hair?

 

Sasuke blinks, staring back into a pair of dark eyes that he doesn’t recognize.

 

They also don’t seem to recognize him.

 

Hm. How anti-climactic.

Or not, since—

Who the fuck is this?!

 

“Sorry I’m late.” The man says, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. “Had to make sure no one was following me, you know?”

 

“Understandable.” Kakashi replies. “Still, I don’t like to be kept waiting.”

 

He says this easily, almost flippant, but the air around them fills with more than just smoke. There’s tension—almost palpable, like the taste of metal on the tongue—and mistrust flowing in both directions. It’s still. No one moves for what feels like an eternity.

 

“We came for information.” Jirobo reminds him none-to-gently, when their nerves have just about gotten the best of them. “So start talking.”

 

“Should we be doing this so openly?” Sasuke says quietly, remembering where they are. His voice is steady but he's reeling—he thought….he thought it’d be someone else, someone he knew. He didn’t prepare himself for it being a stranger, didn’t let it cross his mind. He can’t decide if this is better or worse. If he’s guilty or not for doubting any one of them. This man’s motives are completely unknown. From the looks of him, he likes trouble and fully plans for the lot of them to fall into some.

 

“Sasuke’s right.” Kakashi says. “Let’s take this outside.”

 

He’s horribly outnumbered, this Kidomaru, once they join the others.

 

That reflects on his face; the easy smile he had on first arriving fades into a nervous twitching of his lips, eyes swinging around like a pendulum. He stuffs his hands in the pockets but immediately thinks better of it, letting them awkwardly hang by his sides. Standing underneath the harsh glow of the street lamp, Sasuke thinks he sees something like regret pass over his features for a moment, but it’s gone from one breath to the next.

 

“I have a bunker nearby,” Kidomaru says once they’re a little ways from the bar. Everyone followed him without a word, sharing a few troubled glances but ultimately saying nothing. “The locals might look stupid but we still shouldn’t say too much around them.”

 

He’s not sure what the man means, since he was going to spill his guts in a busy bar booth before Sasuke suggested otherwise. He gathers that the man isn’t too bright, or just has the bad habit of contradicting himself. He won’t even be around long enough for it to be annoying because Sasuke knows that the minute Kakashi get what he wants, the commander's going to put a bullet in the back of his head and that’ll be that. They hadn’t discussed what they would do with the mole as a...team over the past few weeks—or, maybe Kakashi did with the other humans, but certainly not with him—but no one here is naive enough to think he’ll be able to walk away from this.

 

Except maybe Kidomaru.

 

How unfortunate, to be left out of the loop.

 

“I got in over my head, you know?” He says conversationally as they walk. He’s leading them towards the edge of town, where the overgrowth has taken over, full of ruins and crumbling foundations. Sasuke’s barely paying him any mind, instead watching the roofs and the dark corners for any movement. The lateness of the hour has seen fog settle in, making the town seem haunted and even more desolate.

 

Sasuke rolls his eyes. Who joins a terrorist group and then complains about it? Did he think it would be _fun_?

 

“I thought it’d be more fun, to be honest.  Like, we’d blow some shit up, scare some folks, and steal money or something. Rebels without a cause and all that. But they _do_ have a cause and it got a little too freaky for me and I knew I had to get out. Everything was always so serious all the time and boring. If we’re about to die we should at least go out in a blaze of glory, you know?”

 

Sasuke’s eyes might just roll out of his head. Seriously? Tayuya seems to think the same, and for a moment their eyes meet in twin looks of confused astonishment at his stupidity.

 

“And what is their cause?” Kakashi asks patiently. At least, it seems like patience. He’s talking slowly and deliberately, like he realizes that he’s talking to a fucking idiot, and he knows he’s going to have to guide him to the point.

 

Kidomaru stops short and turns on his heel, eyes alight with secrets and intrigue.

 

“You’re not going to believe this, but,” He starts, turning so he’s addressing the Synths directly. Sasuke feels his brows rise into his hairline, surprised and more than a little wary. “So they—”

 

All at once, Sasuke realizes they’ve stopped out in the open, far from the occupied shops and the ramshackle homes.

 

—No crickets,

No more stragglers on the streets,

 Buzzing with idle chatter.

Just the blink of fireflies,

And they blink in utter silence.

 

“Boss!” Jirobo cries out in alarm, gun pointed at something in the distance. Sasuke sees nothing, feeling his heart rise to his throat as he reaches for his own weapon. It’s a field in front of them, wide open and empty. He sees nothing! How can a human see something that he can’t?!

 

There! A sudden flash, like a flare. Red smoke lights up the night sky, dancing towards the stars, hurtling towards him. It lands in a dry patch of grass inches from his foot, setting it ablaze immediately. Sasuke curses and jumps back, aiming his scope in the direction it came from. There’s a black blur but it’s ducked down in the tall grass before he can get a shot off.

 

“I told you this was a fucking trap!” Suigetsu yells, pressing his handgun against Kidomaru’s temple as he tugs the other man protectively against his body. Kidomaru makes a noise of alarm and protest, and strangely, Sasuke believes him. The idiot probably had no idea he was being tailed, and that only makes this worse.  

 

“We don’t have time to argue about it now!” Mitsuki screams, returning fire.

 

“Just fucking shoot him!” Sakon yells to Suigetsu, who looks like he’s strongly considering it. He refrains, choosing to return fire as well so he doesn’t get his head blown off. He pushes the snitch away with a disgusted huff.

 

Sasuke pays none of them any mind, choosing instead of activate his suit that’s been hiding underneath his civilian clothes. It was hot as all hell wearing both, but he just knew he’d need it tonight. He sees Juugo and Karin doing the same beside him as they run for cover. It’s sparse, out in the open as they are, but he finds a half wall above a crumbled set of stairs that lead nowhere and presses himself against it.

 

He’s blinded for a second while his helmet materializes over his face, and he hopes he won’t catch a bullet before it can finish.

 

His eyesight’s even better now, with the built in scopes his suit is outfitted with. He registers fifteen signatures immediately, scattered in the high grass but still clearly in formation. Fifteen? That seems like too many, by his count.  But now that he knows there are others that have joined he has no idea where the number stands. Is that too little? About half? 

 

He’s not too keen on asking, given the circumstances.

 

A bullet strikes the wall above him, snapping him back to attention. He hunches over the wall, aims and forgets himself. Forgets that he’s supposed to be playing the part and not actually following through. But his training kicks in, and his spotless record shines true. The shot connects, sending one of the rebels tumbling down with a pained yelp.

 

Only in the leg. Not fatal, but he feels the weight of that shot sitting on his chest and the blood drain from his face.

 

Fuck! Who did he hit? He can’t tell under the cover of darkness and through the sparks of the firefight.

 

If they make it out of this, he knows he’ll pay for that shot later. Somehow.

 

Genma yells something to him from his parallel hiding place, something he can’t quite make out, and he doesn’t get the chance to ask him to repeat himself because something’s landing next to Genma and it sends him flying. Concrete explodes everywhere, pulverized into a raining shower of rocks. Sasuke sucks in a breath, but a quick scan tells him that the handler with live. The blast only served to knock him out.

 

Mitsuki must not be focused enough to realize that Genma’s virtually fine, too blinded, because he yells in outrage and charges forward.

 

“Fuck you!” He screams, firing blindly into the night. He’s never been any good under pressure, stupid enough to stand stock still in the middle of the street trying to get hits off. No one’s quick enough to call him back, and it comes as no surprise when he takes a bullet to the chest. It explodes through his back, painting the ground red. Someone has shotgun, and a powerful one at that.

 

Mitsuki's eyes are wild as he stumbles, blood bubbling up and out his mouth in one long, syrupy drip. Sasuke winces—feeling sympathy for the pain rather than the man himself. No matter how much Sasuke doesn’t like him, he didn’t wish for him to die. It’s apparent that he will, since humans don’t survive wounds like that.

 

Mitsuki's a soldier, a highly trained one at that, so he knows this. Of course he knows, with all the battle he’s seen. All those he’s won and lost. Still, he’s not giving up just yet. He has enough strength to continue through labored breaths.  He produces a grenade, grinning through bloody teeth, and he throws it.

 

He doesn’t see where it lands, as another round buries itself in his neck in the next instant, and that’s the end of that.

 

It missed. Of course it fucking missed. He couldn’t have had the strength to cover the distance and hit the enemy. Instead, it stays local, discharging before it hits the ground, taking Suigetsu's right arm with it.

 

Sasuke’s never heard him yell like that, ragged and full of agony. It’s an ugly sight and Sasuke feels his stomach lurch in warning before he collects himself.

 

“Motherfucker!” He screams, hoarse and jagged. Karin jumps into action, tugging him by his good arm behind her cover in a blink of an eye. He hears a flurry of words, too garbled to make out over all the chaos, and then she’s up again, shooting off expert shot after shot into the grass. At least three of the rebels go down, and Sasuke can’t even consider what to do next before she’s flying backwards, blood blossoming from a wound above her breast.

 

—Shit! Shit! Shit!

 

Juugo’s voice rumbles over the comm device in his ear, catching with uncharacteristic emotion.

 

“We have to go.” He says, voice almost even. The waiver gives him away, and Sasuke feels fear for maybe the millionth time since this whole thing started. “We have to retreat. We need to go right now.”

 

“I know.” He responds, shaken by his own notes of deadly calm.

 

“You fuckers better not think you’re gonna leave us!” Suigetsu says into his mic, voice wracked with pain and strain. “I’ll haunt your asses for the rest of your lives if you do!”

 

That almost makes him crack a smile, but not quite.

 

“Of course not.” Juugo says confidently. Sasuke can’t say the same. He’s too busy running simulations in his head and he doesn’t see them all getting out of this.

 

“But before that,” Juugo continues. “Sasuke, Kakashi’s gone.”

 

“What!?” he exclaims. They took out the commander? When? How did he miss that?!

 

“I lost track of him once the firing started. I don’t know where he went. It seems that he abandoned us. ”

 

“Are you—fuck!” He swears. That slippery sonofabitch—!

 

“He left?” Suigetsu groans. “Fucking humans!”

 

It’s strange, though. No human commander he’s ever come across left their underlings in the heat of battle. They go down with the ship, always. He doesn’t have time to explore it now, but he catches the look the human soldiers wear on their faces through the smoke and the sparks: Betrayal. Disbelief. Anger and Confusion. Of course this hasn’t happened before. Of course they don’t understand. Neither does he.

 

They don’t get to mull over it for long, since another explosive goes off. Static shocks his ear, making him cry out. Someone got disconnected, but he can’t figure out who.

 

Ah.

 

 It’s him, he realizes, when he feels heat lick at his body from all directions.  He's thrown into the air as his suit malfunctions. Colors dance across his HUD screen in a wave and everything pulses once, twice, and a third time. Time slows down as he turns in the air, breath punching out of him.  Even though the fog, he sees the stars through his broken visor, and the glitch of his broken monitor against them looks like—like—

 

— _Oh_.

 

He lands in the grass with a hard thud.

 

He’s winded and without his gun. He pats besides him to make sure of that fact, and swears when he finds it to be true. All of him is in one piece, which counts for something. Maybe. Even though he’s going to be killed in no time flat once someone spots him.

 

Sasuke only realizes how far he’d been thrown once he looks up, realizing he’s way too far from Juugo and the others for them to be any help. Not that Suigetsu could do much right now and Karin’s not faring much better. He knows they won’t be able to see him from here, probably figuring he’s dead already, blasted away as he was.

 

Prone and shaking, he tries to make peace with it. Even though it’s wrong. Even though he failed. Again. Even though he wanted to...wanted to be able to change how this would turn out and never got close to seeing that realized.

 

No. No, it’s not over yet. He turns over onto his stomach, even though it feels like hell to do so. He might be able to—

 

“Wait, wait!” Kidomaru yells, holding his hands up in surrender. He materialized almost out of nowhere. The gunfire died down some, as the humans moved backwards in hope of a retreat.

 

“I was leading them here, I swear!” He shouts. Sasuke huffs from his place on the ground, pissed that the asshole is playing both sides. He hopes they don’t fall for it.

 

It’s Kiba who materializes from the smoke and the mist. His face is painted an array of colors. If not for all the high tech gear he’s sporting, he’d almost look primal. Like days of old, with warring tribes and borders made of stone instead of electric fences. Oddly, this suits him.

 

The barrel of his gun presses right against Kidomaru’s forehead, so Sasuke has his answer.

 

“Bullshit.” He hisses, pressing it harder. Sasuke sees the shadows of two others pressing forward in the mist, and knows that it’s over.

 

For the both of them.

 

Sasuke sees Kidomaru smirk and shrug. He sweeps Kiba’s legs out from under him, producing a gun from his waistband.

 

“Well, it was worth a shot.” He says, as Kiba curses and raises his arms to defend himself.

 

Sasuke’s faster.

 

The knife he keeps in his boot for emergencies like this almost slips out of his sweaty palm, but he manages to hang on. He springs upward, exploding forward like he's a track star starting a lap, and grips Kidomaru’s ponytail as hard as he can.

 

He hears something tear—probably the follicles coming away from the scalp from the force of it—and Kidomaru yelps at the same time. He presses the knife underneath one ear and doesn’t stop until he reaches the other. Blood spurts in a heavy stream to land at Kiba’s feet, splashing on his shiny black boots.

 

“Wha—” Kiba starts, absolutely bewildered. Sasuke can’t imagine what this looks like from Kiba’s place on the ground and he has no way of explaining save for taking his helmet off to reveal his face. He can’t, since that last ditch effort robbed him of waning strength. He goes down to one knee, hand gripping his ribs. He definitely bruised one of them in the fall and it’s rearing its ugly head now of all times. Great.

 

“I’m—” Sasuke huffs. His chest feels pinched and he wonders if he punctured a lung too. “—Friendly.” He finally gets out, which sounds utterly ridiculous and completely juxtaposes his actions at the start of this fight, but he hopes Kiba will believe it.

 

The other man seems confused because, well, who wouldn’t be? But he nods all the same and plants his hands against the ground and goes to stand. Sasuke watches him rise, releasing a breath that he didn’t realize he was holding. Kiba stares down at him in wonder and bemusement as the others catch up to them, appearing through the fog like a group of spectres.

 

—and then he sees him.

Sasuke’s rabbit heart

Rockets up to a fever pitch.

 

He almost slips, gives himself away. Almost calls his name.

 

But the butt of Naruto’s gun smashes into the side of his face before he gets the chance and the world fades to black.

 

**C.**

 

He wakes to the sound of hurried chatter.

 

His neck leans to the side, unsupported in the open air. His arms are behind his back in the most uncomfortable way and the chain around his middle presses painfully across his wounds.

 

So they tied him up. That’s better than killing him outright, he guesses. They probably want information, or answers, or both.

 

He looks out of the hole in his helmet, taking in the sights around him. His vision’s still swimming, but he can tell that there in some kind of warehouse by the looks of it. Dormant conveyor belts and broken machinery litter the space.  Son of a bitch, were they really holed up in the cannery? Despite himself, he feels a tiny smile budding.

 

 He hears a woman’s voice, but can’t place it, He’s trying to regain his focus as it seems like his brain has spent hours rattling around in his skull.

 

“—at do you mean he saved you?” The female voice says from his left. Right? Above him?

 

He can pick up Kiba’s voice next, since that’s probably who she was addressing anyway.

 

“Exactly as I said before!” He exclaims, sounding frustrated. He wonders how long they’ve been going over this. “Kidomaru was going to shoot me in my fucking face and this guy slit his throat before he could. He was trying to talk to me but you guys had to go and knock him out!”

 

“Why would he do that, though?” Another female voice asks. “It doesn’t make sense.”

 

Sasuke agrees. It doesn’t.

 

“Ask him yourself. He’s awake.” And all the blurry heads cease their conversations and turn towards him.

 

Ah.

 

He hates being the center of attention.

 

Shikamaru steps forward, eyebrows pushed low over his eyes. Sasuke notes that his hair’s longer, almost brushing mid-back now instead of the back of his neck like he remembers. He’s broader too. Scars dot his face that he doesn't remember being there, either.

 

Shikamaru’s brow dip even lower, probably concerned as to why Sasuke’s one visible eye is studying him so intently.

 

“Let’s keep it simple: who are you?”

 

That’s a good question, isn’t it?

 

An easy one, too, but his mouth won’t move.

 

Shikamaru narrows his eyes. “I asked you a question.”

 

“This is pointless!” a gravelly voice exclaims from beside him. It comes from a fiery redhead that he doesn’t recognize. “He’s a trained dog; he’s not going to just tell you who he is when you ask!”

 

“Calm down, Gaara.” Naruto says calmly from his perch. He’s a little further away; one of his legs is pressed up near his chest while the other swings above the ground. He stares at Sasuke with a startling level of calm intensity. When Sasuke turns his head to stare back at him, Naruto’s head cocks to the side in question, eyes narrowed in thought.

 

“We never know what he’ll tell us unless we ask.” He says simply. He gestures for Shikamaru to continue.

 

Shikamaru raises an eyebrow at Naruto and they share a look that Sasuke can’t quite decipher.

 

That makes him feel strange since he never had to wonder what was going on in his best friend’s head. He could always read him like a book. It’s probably that uncomfortable thought that loosens his jaw, prompting him to say: “Naruto? Asking questions _first_? Never thought I’d see the day.”

 

Naruto blinks, as do the others. They all look between each other in confusion and apprehension.  

 

Naruto smiles slowly, dangerously, putting his raised leg down so he can stand. “Do I know you?” He asks. Demands, is more like.

 

“I don’t like this.” Ino mutters quietly off to the side to Sakura. “Something isn’t right.”

 

Well, she’s not wrong.

 

“You do.” Sasuke says. “You should probably take off the helmet now.”

 

He wonders why they didn’t before. Maybe they didn’t know how to get it off, or just didn’t care to try.

 

Everyone tenses up at that, sharing glances. The faces he doesn’t recognize all go for their guns, pointing them at Sasuke’s head like he’s going to break free any second now. He wouldn’t even if he could, since he’d be dead before he could blink.

 

No one moves, so it’s up to Shikamaru to stalk forward in annoyance and grip the edges of his helmet. He tugs it upward violently and it makes Sasuke’s hair settle wildly on his face. He throws his hair back behind his head in a huff, sending Shikamaru the stink eye at his rough treatment.

 

Silence.

 

The look on their faces are priceless. There’s shock, disbelief, outright denial. He sees the stages of grief pass through their eyes in less than a second.

 

He has nothing cool or profound to say here, so he settles on a weak smirk and a: “Hey.”

 

“What?” a black haired man he doesn’t know says. He strangely resembles Sasuke in a way and it throws him off.  “Who is he and why do you all look like that?”

 

Sakura actually gasps, talking an abortive step forward. “Sasuke?”

 

Now that he knows that he’s thrown them for a loop and they aren’t going to shoot him between the eyes, he’s feeling surprisingly cheeky and confident.

 

“In the flesh.” He replies.

 

“Not possible.” Naruto says, eyes hard. Sasuke swings his eyes to look at him and the other man actually flinches. “Your tracker says you're at the Gallows right now. On _Earth_. This is a trick.”

 

The Gallows, slang of the Capitol’s main police headquarters. Of course a tracker would put him there, since no one was supposed to know that he left Earth for this mission. He had to get his old one removed before they left, and it’s signal would be bounced around his usual haunts so no one would be the wiser.

 

Still, it warms and worries him that they’d been keeping track of his movements.

 

“You were tracking me?” He asks. “Why?”

 

Naruto's face colors at that and he ignores the question. Hmm. Interesting. Something to explore later, when he's not tied to a chair.

 

“You know him?” Gaara asks, looking at Naruto for confirmation.

 

Naruto nods, but doesn’t say anything else.

 

“Ask him something only Sasuke would know.” TenTen says, she seems mistrustful as well, but her eyes are bright with hope that maybe he’s the real thing.

 

“That’s no good.” Lee replies. Sasuke blinks in surprise since he hadn’t noticed him there. That's something rarely said about Lee, of all people.  “If he’s a clone or something of the sort, they’ll have implanted his memories.”

 

Hmm. That’s true.

 

“He saved Kiba, didn’t he?” Ino says. Like TenTen, he can see that she _wants_ it to really be him, and some tiny part of him is excited about that. ”Why would a clone do that? They’d send him to kill us, wouldn’t they?”

 

Shikamaru’s not so forthcoming. “Or they’d send him to gain our trust and then kill us.”

 

A fair point.

 

“I’m not here to kill anyone.” Sasuke says slowly. He can tell that most of them think that’s bullshit but he’s going to try anyway.

 

….this isn’t how this reunion was supposed to go. He’s terribly disappointed at that fact, wishing he could have gotten here sooner so they wouldn’t have to see him through his uniform. He feels like a fool for thinking they might welcome him back into the fold with open arms instead of him staring down the barrel of their guns like the goddamn turncoat he is.

 

“No one answered my question.” The look-alike says, “Who is he?”

 

“Shut up Sai, will you?” Ino snaps at him. Sai raises his hands in mock surrender.

 

“An old friend.” Naruto says, voice devoid of emotion. He’s unspeakably angry and Sasuke can tell, but he’s not exactly sure what the other man is angry about. There’s one too many options for that right now.

 

“You still consider us friends?” Sasuke slips, regretting it immediately. He meant to say it with something that sounded more like relief, but it ended up coming out like he was suspicious.  

 

Naruto’s eye twitches like he’s insulted. “I do. But you’re making it very hard with that outfit on. A Hunter, Sasuke? Really?”

 

“Called it.” Kiba says under his breath.

 

“No, you said I’d end up being a teacher like Iruka. As you can see, a teacher I am not.” Sasuke replies, remembering. Kiba smirks at him and Sasuke would return it but Naruto’s glaring daggers at the both of them.

 

“How is Iruka-Sensei by the way?” Lee questions, ignoring the standoff unfolding before him. It’s good to see that some of them haven't changed; Lee’s oblivious as ever to the mood of the room.  “Did you keep it touch with him? We lost track of him a while ago.”

 

Sasuke sobers, an old hurt flaring up inside his chest. “Dead.” He says, and he watches the other’s faces fall. “There was a bombing at the school. Another teacher lost it and took out the whole first floor. He didn’t suffer.”

 

“Fuck.” Kiba curses.

 

“Yeah.” He mutters, hanging his head.

 

“....and Neji?” TenTen askes warily, like she’s afraid of his answer. “Hinata? What about them? We couldn’t find anything on them.”

 

So they did attempt to keep track of them. That answers a few questions that Sasuke didn’t even know he had.

 

—So they did care.

At least a little.

That’s something—

Right?

 

“Safe.” He says, and she deflates in relief. “They’re Eyes now. They weren’t really given a choice.”

 

The others nod, taking his words in. Naruto doesn’t move, just keeps staring at him, and it makes Sasuke want to squirm in his seat.

 

“And you? Were you given a choice?” He asks. “To become what you are now?”

 

Was he? His parents were spies, his friends were gone, his brother defected. He was alone and he had to prove his loyalty to the State somehow, didn’t he?

 

Right?

 

“I was.” He replies, even though it feels like a lie.

 

“And you chose...this?” Naruto says in disgust, making a vague gesture at him. At his broken helmet, at his black morph suit. At the distance between that that’s only inches but feels like arces.  

 

No point in being ashamed of it now. He’s done enough of that to last him a lifetime.

 

“I did.”

 

Naruto huffs in frustration, hands on his hips. Sasuke can see the conflict in his eyes, like he can’t reconcile that Sasuke could ever stoop so low. But he has, and the proof is right in front of him.

 

“Why?” He asks, and Sasuke knew it was coming.

 

“Loneliness does strange things to people.” He answers. He says it easily enough, with a purse of his lips and a shrug, even though he feels like he’s choking. Even though he feels like he’s revealing too much. It’s always been a bad habit of his when those steely blue eyes are upon him, and he feels shame and condemnation for his own weakness and insecurity.

 

“Don’t give me that shit! You always had the choice to come with us!” Naruto shouts. The new faces shift uncomfortably. This conversation is too raw, too open, too private for them, even though Sasuke feels like they haven’t even scratched the surface of it.

 

The old faces? They look away, occupying themselves with their fingernails or studying the peeling wallpaper.  Something they've always done, when Naruto and Sasuke are at it again. It’s strangely nostalgic, save for being held at gunpoint.

 

“You know I didn't and you know why I couldn’t.” He says, feeling his own heat rise. He can’t right now. He can’t do this. They don’t have the time and maybe they never will. “But we’re not going to talk about this now because there are much more important things we have to deal with.”

 

“Who is ‘we’?” Naruto exclaims angrily, stalking forward. “So what, you’re with us now? You think you can just walk in here like nothing’s changed and we’ll just _let_ you?”

 

He did. Like a fucking idiot, he did.

 

He tries not to let it show on his face.

 

“Naruto…”Kiba says in warning. He knows that the blond haired man is getting worked up, so he steps in between them, his back to Sasuke.

 

“What? Am I wrong?” Naruto asks Kiba, waving his hands.

 

“No, you aren’t, but…” he sends a look over his shoulder to make eye contact with Sasuke. “But I owe him one, and Sasuke’s never been one to lie, right? If he says he’s not going to hurt anyone, I believe him.”

 

How nice of him. It’s almost surprising, since when they were younger, Sasuke got the distinct impression that Kiba only tolerated him because the others did. Maybe he was wrong.

 

“I think we can trust him, too.” Sakura says. “We can keep an eye on him, sure, but I mean, it’s Sasuke, right?”

 

Into nods beside her, and Sasuke turns his attention to Shikamaru for his opinion.

 

The other man looks at him, appraising, before he shrugs and sighs.

 

“What they said.” he declares, and Sasuke’s grateful, but it’s ultimately up to Naruto as to what they’ll do next.

 

Naruto’s reluctant, still angry. He folds his arms and paces.

 

Everyone watches him move, waiting for him decide. That’s all it’s been for Sasuke for the past few months. Waiting. He’s sick of it.

 

“If you can’t find it in you to trust me,” He says, causing Naruto’s eyes to snap back to him. “Then just kill me and be done with it.”

 

Because if he came all this way for nothing, he's not going back with his tail between his legs. He has at least a little pride left and it won't allow him that.

 

“Now, hold on a minute—” Lee starts in protest.

 

“I’m on board with that.” Gaara says, advancing. Naruto stone gaze roots him back to his spot.

 

“Wait a second—” Ino cries at the same time.

 

Naruto raises a hand to silence them and they all hush at once. Sasuke’s impressed for a moment, seeing Naruto act as their leader. It’s not foreign for him to admire the other man, but looking at him now him seems in charge, tall, rugged, and dare he say, cool? His emotions are all over the place and he honestly doesn’t know how he feels, if he’s honest.

 

Naruto sidesteps Kiba so he can stand in front of Sasuke. He looks down at him silently, so intense that Sasuke thinks he might just combust on the spot. It’s an eternity before anyone speaks again, before Naruto moves again. He just stares down at him like it's the only thing that matters and searches Sasuke’s eyes for something. For what, he’s unsure. Whatever it is, he must find it, because he finally shifts and Sasuke lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

 

“Are you trying to call my bluff? Do you think I wouldn’t be able to do it?” Naruto says, leaning in close. Slowly. Dangerously. He’s more calculated now, no longer some dumb kid with big dreams. He’s seen too much—too much sorrow, too much grief, too much hatred and violence— just like Sasuke. He’s still distinctly Naruto but the air of danger that permeates around him is as impressive as it is terrifying.

 

“I know you’d be able to do it.” Sasuke replies with a single raised eyebrow. “And I also know that you won’t.”

 

Was it too much? He’s applying old rules for their relationship and it could cost him his life. There was always a safe level to antagonize Naruto on, and level built of confidence and trust that they wouldn’t cross a line that neither paid much mind to. He wonders if the years have blown sand over the tracks, if he can still find them and follow them anymore.

 

There’s no use in mulling over it, since for the first time since he regained consciousness—mere minutes, even though it seemed like hours ago—he gets a true smile out of Naruto and an almost affectionate eye roll. _Almost_.

 

To him, it feels like victory.

 

“I guess you’re right. “ Naruto says, giving him a look. “I hate when you’re right.”

 

“I thought you’d be used to it, at this point.” Sasuke replies, falling into old banter that comes as easy at the sunrise.

 

Naruto sucks his teeth. “Shut up.” he says, and Sasuke counts his lucky stars that it still sounds playful.

 

“Can we untie him now?” Lee asks, although already moving to do so.

 

Naruto waves his hand flippantly, turning away. “Sure, why not?”

 

Just like that, the tension recedes, but he can’t quite say that anyone’s resting easy. The others who names he doesn’t know still look at him like he’s going to bite and he’s quite sure that he’s not in Naruto’s good graces just yet, but for the first time in a long time, he feels….good.

 

“Welcome to the fray I guess.” Shikamaru says, helping him out of his chair. “Or is it ‘welcome back’?”

 

That’s a good question, isn’t it?

**...**

 

He was a fool to think it’d be that easy.


	4. Dandelion

 

* * *

 

 **Four.**  

_There's no pride_

_In sharing scars_

_To prove it_

 

—Fake It, Bastille

* * *

 

**A.**

An outlier.  
  
That’s what he feels like; an outsider, on the fringes but not quite there. Unlikely and mostly unaccounted for.  
  
Naruto doesn’t trust him.  
  
That much is certain.  
  
Why would he? No matter what he’s been holding on to—what they’ve _both_ been holding on to— for all these years, those years are the answer to the hanging questions that bubble around them. They are strangers and time hasn’t been so kind. Why shouldn’t he be jaded and closed off? Sasuke’s the same, if not worse.  
  
But it’s awkward and painful to be so close yet so far, hands outstretched but not quite reaching. Sasuke wonders if it shows on his face that’s he suffocating, ready to pop with words unsaid, while Naruto simply pretends he’s not here. It’s probably not hard for him to treat Sasuke like an inconvenient ghost with all the moving they do in the following days. They’re in a new hideout within two turns of the moon, this one more imperceptible than the last, plotting plans in hurried whispers while he’s sent to do grunt work like gathering supplies and fixing leaks.  
  
With a fucking chaperone.  
  
Dramatic reunions don’t stop the going-ons of a terrorist group, funnily enough, and the whiplash of it all leaves Sasuke lost and out of sorts.  
  
A waiting game he’ll do, until the eyes around him soften once more and the tight-knit circle allows for some give. Sooner rather than later, he hopes, since his patience has all about run thin behind the long looks and cold shoulders.  
  
In the meantime, Sasuke watches. Observes, catalogs, makes notes for later, since that’s what he’s good at.  
  
Unlike the group he was traveling with before, this one is a well-oiled machine. Not one bit or bolt out of place. Everyone’s matched and responsible for what they’re good at, and there’s an easy comfortableness that they all share that’s enviable. Since he had that.  
  
Once.

  
 —But certainly not amongst

The random smattering of blank faces  
 He met and abandoned  
to prolong his solitude.

  
  
He had it _here_ , but in another time and in another place, and it’s cruel for it to be dangled in his face like the smiling prizes of old arcade machines.  
  
In the meantime, he learns names and quilts together backstories from the snippets of conversation he hears (eavesdrops) on.  
  
There’s Sora, a troubled boy, young and reckless and angry at the world who was shipped in from the Alpha Centauri colony. He’s quite like Naruto in his youth, and sometimes the two of them understandably butt heads over the simplest of things. In quiet moments, when the day’s grown old and tired, Sasuke sees the boy staring at Naruto with something that looks like reverence, watching his form burn bright in the shadow of the campfire, something Sasuke understands all too well.  
  
There’s Kimimaro, who Sasuke’s shocked to find out is a Model Two. He guesses Delta-1 really does allow them to have their own opinions. There’s something revolutionary in that, and he’s surprised the others aren’t making a bigger deal out of it. Stupidly, he realizes that they most likely already did, but he wasn’t present for that part.  
  
He’s quiet and eerie, but he takes to sitting next to Sasuke and comments about mundane things like he’s getting used to having a personality of his own. He probably is, so Sasuke indulges him and pretends not notice how pleased the other man becomes when he realizes Sasuke’s still listening.  
  
There’s Sai, who seems less and less like a clone of himself the more he watches. A wild fighter from Orion, near Venus. He’s seen more death than the grim reaper, personally responsible for leagues more, but somehow remains jovial if not slightly clueless. It’s most likely an act to hide a complete and thorough breakdown, but Sasuke can’t know for certain since Sai has little interest in talking to him, just like the others.

  
Temari and Kankuro consider themselves to be siblings, brought up in the same house by the same mad man. Their story is a sad one, but they carry themselves well. They hail from Lennox, a settlement outlying Neptune. Their situation even rarer, since while two “children” in a household was a rarity itself, three was completely unheard of. The third, of course, is Gaara.  
  
Gaara doesn’t like him. At all. Not one bit.

He stares daggers at Sasuke any chance he gets, like he’s a cobra ready to strike. It makes Sasuke antsy and itchy for a fight. He doesn’t understand his vitriol, but with how frustrated and left out he’s felt over the slow-crawling days he’ll be damned if he doesn’t meet it at the door. Sasuke learns that Naruto once saved the man from execution and he’s been devoted to him ever since, always two steps behind and ready to jump into the action at a moment’s notice if Naruto says the word. He sees Sasuke as a threat, then. Someone out to hurt his precious leader. Or maybe he decided he just didn’t like Sasuke’s face. Either way, they have static and Sasuke doesn’t see it being smoothed over any time soon.  
  
He learns of the dead, those that died well before he landed here and those that died a few nights ago, which Karin was responsible for, hailing from all over the solar system. Anko, Konan, Yahiko, left to rot in the grass because they couldn’t risk burying them. The others mourn for them and Sasuke feels guilt licking at his heels for it, and for the limp Kankuro stumbles around on from Sasuke’s own bullet.  
  
He wants desperately to ask if the fates of his team are known. Juugo wasn’t injured, but Sasuke has no idea what happened after he was knocked unconscious. He wonders if Karin can still use her left arm, if Suigetsu bled out from the loss of his right, if Juugo knows that Sasuke was taken or if he thinks him dead. But he can’t bring himself ask and no one offers.  
  
He learns of Kidomaru and his story, how they took him in because he had no one. A stray cat, lost in the world with no home to go back to. He can tell that his betrayal burns like hellfire, even though the others pretend like it does not. It’s questioned, the _why_ of it all, tearily by Tenten, and the only answer that is given is a shaken head and a shrug. Sasuke knows, but the question wasn’t asked of him so he shuts his mouth. Gaara pipes up after the awkward silence, with a dry tone and a poisonous, purposeful glance:

“That’s why we don’t trust _outsiders_.” He says, and Sasuke feels more gazes on him, knowing who the barb was really meant for. He chuckles from his isolated corner, but says nothing. What’s the point in arguing? To him, Gaara’s an outsider, as well as the others who will only serve as cannon fodder in the days to come. It’s a vicious thought, but he’s not feeling so optimistic now and won’t stoop so low as to argue semantics. It’s not worth rising to, since if they wanted him gone he would be already, so Gaara’s just going to have to stew in his seat about this outsider getting a portion of the evening meal.

It’s not a widely shared sentiment, anyway, since after the first night, Ino pulled him to the side and cried on his shoulder. The damn finally broke, between missing him and the weight of her struggles. He doesn’t want to say that he knows what she’s been through but he gets the feeling that she’s already aware. He grips her tight and lets her cry, fighting down tears himself.

 

Sakura makes sure he's eaten and that he’s comfortable in his bedroll, even if it’s set a little further away from the rest. Tenten‘s quick strike up conversation with him, but only when Naruto’s occupied elsewhere to avoid friction. She’s often his chaperone when he has to do errands and he forgot how much he enjoyed her laugh.

 

The men aren’t as open with it, sometimes sitting near him to keep company or offering to let him join a card game. They’re more obvious in the side they’ve taken, which makes sense since Sasuke’s wasn’t even an option until a few nights ago. They’re awkward and stifled though, like they want to be more open and include him, but Sasuke’s certain they’ve been expressly told not to.

 

He’s trying not to let it get to him, but he’s not sure how much longer he can keep it up. Something has to give so he doesn’t go insane. It’s no better than being back at his headquarters on earth: one wrong move and he’ll be sent packing. He doesn’t like being on a tightrope and doesn’t like being stared at like he’s some rare art piece. Soon, he’ll have had enough, and with each passing day he swears he’s going to storm out into the wilderness and just forget this whole thing.

 

And if he keeps putting off doing that until tomorrow, well…

 

He has his reasons.

* * *

 

 

**B.**

 

His mother sits in a heap on the floor, clutching the last photo they took together as a family.

 

Sasuke pauses in the doorway, messenger bag sliding to the floor off of his slack and shocked shoulder. His mouth parts, but he doesn’t know what to say.

 

She kisses the floor, curls up in a ball, prays to some God that she knows doesn’t hear her as she sobs out meaningless nothings into the floorboards.

 

He takes a cautious step forward, unsure, unnerved. He can recall seeing her cry exactly twice in his short life: once, when his brother left, and before that, when she found her two boys under heavy blankets watching the stars on a quiet night. Sasuke was so young then, feet still swinging loose in the air when he sat since they couldn’t touch the floor.

 

His brother was wrapped around him while he sat in Itachi’s lap, eyes low and drooping, being lulled to sleep by his brother quietly explaining the cosmos to him. He still can feel the careful kisses to his hairline and whisper of breath against his cheek.

 

The sight moved her so much that she cried silently with a smile on her face when they asked her what was wrong, but she told them they were happy tears, and she’d come back and get them when they fell asleep.

 

These aren’t happy tears. He doesn’t think any of her tears have been happy for a long while.

 

She notices him then, frozen in question, one hand raised to comfort her. He can barely look at her stained glass gaze or the thick black tar that slides down her face, but he can’t bring himself to look away.

 

They don’t speak for what feels like ages. She stares, eyes falling lower and lower until they close and another sob escapes her mouth.

 

“Mother?” He hears himself say in horror. He doesn’t understand. He never understands, even when it’s right in front of him.

 

She shakes her head, eyes opening back up in a way that almost looks painful. She licks her quivering lips, and meets his eyes.

 

“Are you really going to leave me, too?” She asks quietly, and he feels his heart break in two.

 

—The lump in his throat

Takes days to swallow.

Long after she’s gotten herself together,

He still has not.

 

She cries in his arms for hours, and even still he has no answer.

 

And that’s the end of that.

 

Or, it’s not, because days before he’s supposed to go, days before he can start truly living, days before his hard-earned freedom, his parents sit him down at the table and break his heart again.

 

“Your mother and I think it’s best if you stay.” His father says over dinner that night. Why is it always dinner, he wonders? They shouldn’t share life shattering news at the table. It’s never good and is such a waste of food since he’s never hungry after.

 

“What?” Is all he can ask, since this is all he’s talked about for weeks. Months. Years. Going off to explore the cosmos with his closest friends. With people he trusts. With Naruto. They supported him just fine this entire time so what’s changed? That’s a stupid question; he knows what’s changed, but it’s not fair. Not now, when he’s so close. Not now!

 

His parents share a look. A quiet, regretful, but firm look and he’s almost certain that this battle’s already lost.

 

“It’s dangerous up there,” His father continues. “Who knows what could happen. Not to mention that the assignments available for our kind are-”

 

“I don’t give a shit about a fucking assignment!” He explodes, slamming his hands down on the table. Their plates clatter loudly in the otherwise silent room. The ticking of the wall clock is giving him a headache and everything seems to be moving too quickly for his liking.

 

“You know that I’ve wanted to do this since….since forever! You can’t just-just-!” He’s not sure what he was going to say here: You can’t stop me! You can’t take this away from me! You can’t punish me because Itachi’s gone! You can’t make me!

But none of it matters because his mother looks away and cuts him off.

 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” she says solemnly, and in that moment, he _hates_ her. “One day you’ll understand that we're doing this for your own good.”

 

One day. One day! That’s what everyone says, isn’t it? Like he’s not here right here, right now and like they couldn’t explain it to him if they really wanted him to understand. But they don’t. They want to control him like they’ve always done and keep him locked away in this gilded cage so he can be just as miserable as they are. No! He won’t! He won’t agree to this!

 

“I’m going.” He says, squaring his shoulders, puffing his chest. He’s never tried before, since he knew it would never work. There’s a first time for everything. But it’s pointless, since his father stares at him blankly and shakes his head.

 

“I’ve already canceled your pass and barred your from travel until further notice. You’ve never given much thought to your future and we can’t just let you ruin it. Did you really think you’d be able to stay with your friends forever? That everything would work out just because you willed it so? They don’t live as we do, they don’t have the same responsibilities we do, so they can just run off and try to live some fantasy up in the stars. You’re different from them, Sasuke, and its high time you acted like it.”

 

Sasuke stares at him, slack jawed. He forgot. He always forgets that his father is a powerful man—or should he say machine?—a ruthless, heartless, powerful man who gets what he wants no matter what. You’d have to be that way, to live your life as a traitor to your own kind as he does.

 

A million and one thoughts fly through his head, each more hateful than the last, but he settles on a simple: “Fuck you.” Even though he knows he’s pushing his luck. Predictably, his father’s brow furrows and he’s no doubt going to fly into some rant but Sasuke’s not going to allow it. He spins on his heel and stalks down the hall and up the stairs, slamming the door so hard it nearly comes off the hinges.

 

He destroys his room that night, in the rage that follows.

 

Somehow, he knew. He always knew he’d be the one that had to stay behind. One way or another. He never thought it’d come from his parents directly. He thought...he thought maybe his brother would come back and they could be together again, and he’d stay to prevent him from running off once more. He thought the he’d be approached by the Spies and they’d force him to rat on his people like his parents so proudly did. He thought maybe he wouldn’t even make it that far and some dumb decision would lead to his early demise. But not this. Not something so petty as to trap him here so they won’t be lonely. He’ll call it like it is. Anything else they say is bullshit; his mother doesn’t want to be alone and his father has always done what he could to grant her wishes. He isn’t stupid.

 

But he is hurt, betrayed, nearly inconsolable. He sits sobbing in a heap on the floor, clutching his wrist with the small, black infinity symbol on it to his chest while he shakes in grief and anger, cursing some God he knows doesn’t hear him.  

 

How will he ever tell Naruto?

 

He can’t bring himself to, even though the deadline’s getting close. He can’t let him leave without saying anything, though, but every time his tears dry and he thinks of stepping out of the house, his body seizes up and fresh tears being anew. It doesn’t matter in the end, since it’s Naruto who seeks him out first. They haven’t spoken in days and Naruto must know that something is wrong. There’s a soft tapping at his window long after the sun’s gone down and Sasuke doesn’t move to answer it. It’s a courtesy, to make sure he’s not occupied and decent, because that window has always open since they were old enough to climb.

 

“Sasuke?” Naruto asks warily. Sasuke can’t blame him; he’s been staring at the wall for hours and he knows his looks match the chaos of the room around him. “What’s wrong? What happened? Everyone’s been asking where you are.”

 

He doesn’t answer, barely acknowledging that his friend is present save for a long sigh. He can’t help but hunch over further and grip the bed sheets.

 

“Are you ok?” Naruto asks, advancing. He kneels, pressing a gentle finger underneath Sasuke’s chin so he’ll look at him, and Sasuke never found it harder to meet someone’s gaze. But, he holds it, feels tears bubbling again and hates the fact that Naruto’s face creases in concern.

 

“I’m not-” he starts, pausing to lick his dry lips. “I’m not going.”

 

Naruto’s brows pull down even further, and he drops down to his knees in front of Sasuke’s slouched form. He presses firm hands into his knees and Sasuke flinches at the touch.

 

“What do you mean? Why not? Why wouldn’t you?” he asks, confusion and hurt creeping into his tone.

 

“I’m staying here.” He says more resolutely, proud that his voice doesn’t shake for only a moment.

 

Naruto stands pulls away, standing suddenly. He narrows his eyes and crosses his arms. “Yes,” he says, shaking his head so hard that his hair slaps against his cheeks. “You are.”

 

“I can’t.” It’s agony to speak, but he pushes on. “I just can’t.”

 

“Fuck that!” Naruto almost shouts, still mindful of the lateness of the hour. “You’ve wanted this forever! Why the fuck would you change your mind when we’re so close, Sasuke?! That doesn’t make any sense! Explain it to me!”

 

Even if he could, he doesn’t get the chance because Naruto’s not done. He takes a second to think and then he’s rattling on a mile a minute. “Something happened with your dad, didn’t it? Don’t make that face; I know it did. You only ever get like this when you guys had it out.  Did he say you couldn’t? This is so fucking stupid. Let me go talk to him.”

 

Sasuke raises his head in alarm and snakes his hand out to catch Naruto’s wrist. “Stop.” He says firmly. “Don’t go down there.”

 

Naruto tries to shake him off but Sasuke’s not budging. “Why the hell not?” He shouts. Why? Because Sasuke can’t bear to hear his father deny him again. He can’t bear for Naruto to see Sasuke so weak and submissive. He won’t be able to take the look on Naruto’s face when he realizes that his words won’t change anything and that this is really it.

 

“He already canceled my flight pass. I’m banned from flying, too, so even if I tried they wouldn’t let me go since I’m flagged.”

 

“He can’t do this to you! It’s not right!” Naruto cries. Sasuke agrees, but he’s powerless. He’s no one. Nothing. He can’t fight his father on this, since the Capitol will agree with his decision to protect “assets”.

 

“I know, but…” He doesn’t know what to say. There’s nothing more to say. It’s over.

 

“You’re just going to give up?” Naruto asks angrily, finally pulling his wrist free. Sasuke hadn’t been aware that he was still holding it.

 

That’s to be expected. That’s all it was ever going to be. It was going to end up with Naruto being disappointed in him, since he’s weak and his friend is not. He always knew.

 

“You’re going to let him get away with it? Stow away or something. We can find a way to hide you. Or maybe we can steal someone else’s pass or-”

 

“Naruto.” Sasuke says quietly. It’s hurting him. It’s hurting the both of them and Sasuke just wants it to stop. He can’t do this.

 

“Don’t.” Naruto says, pointing an accusing finger at him. He’ll ignore the fact that it’s shaking. “Don’t say my name like that. I’m not just going to leave you here!”

 

“I’m sorry.” he mumbles barely audible. Naruto sucks in a breath and turns away from him, hands on his hips. He’s tapping his foot irritably and Sasuke stares at the wall opposite of him while his friend comes to terms with it.

 

After a while, Naruto sighs long and heavy, turning back to face him. Sasuke looks at him, flinching at the steely resolve he finds in the other boy’s eyes.

 

“Fine. Then I’m staying too. I can’t leave you behind, Sasuke.” He says sadly, one knee pressed down into the bed as his arms loop tightly around Sasuke’s neck.

 

**_No._ **

 

Nonononono. He can’t. That’s not right. Sasuke feels himself turn to stone as Naruto rests his head on his shoulder.

 

Naruto deserves more. Deserves to _be_ more. He deserves his freedom and Sasuke can’t be the one to hold him back from that. He’ll hate himself forever if he binds Naruto to him, even though he desperately wants to in this moment.

 

—The warmth of his body

Haunted him for far too long, after.

And he regretted that he was stupid enough

Not to return his embrace.

 

He grips Naruto’s biceps and gently pushes him away. The look of hurt that painted that pretty face kept him from sleeping that night.

 

“No. You won’t.” He says, sounded colder than he’s ever heard himself. “You’re going to go because I don’t need you here.”

 

He understood in that moment, why is brother’s first parting words were cruel and cutting. Sasuke would have never let him walk away otherwise, and he knows Naruto will be the same.

 

He expects Naruto to get angry, to push at him, to curse and call him a liar. But he doesn’t. It’s worse, because blue eyes fill up and lips part in pain. He thrusts his wrist up so Sasuke can see it. He knows what’s there, and he doesn’t want to look.

 

“Forever, Sasuke.” Naruto says lowly. “That’s what we said. That’s why we got these. Did you forget?”

 

He didn’t. He’s pretty sure he wouldn’t for the rest of his life.

 

“I know what I said but it doesn’t matter now.” There’s blood in his mouth from god knows where, blood on his wrist as his fingernails dig hard enough to scratch away some of the skin. He has to make a point; a stupid, heartless point but it has to be done. Naruto watches him take off his own skin, eyes wide and deathly pale.

 

The weight of his lies threaten to pull him right through the floor. “We’re living a fantasy and it’s time to stop.” He hates using his father’s words, but he knows they’ll get a reaction out of Naruto just like it did with him.

 

“Do you really think we’ll be able to do what we want up there? There’s no telling what’s going on in the colonies. It’s all a fucking pipe dream that they sell us so we’ll all be clamoring to go. Seriously, get real, Naruto; We don't have rights, we don’t have futures, we don’t have anything! We don’t even have souls! So no, I _don’t_ need you and you don’t need me, since we’re just skinjobs playing at being human by pretending there’s something _meaningful_ between us. We’re just using each other to pass the time!”

 

Too far. He instantly regrets it. It was almost an acknowledgement of the words unspoken between them— _almost_ , but instead it’s callous and uncalled for, to throw their secret in his face like this. But he can’t take it back, or Naruto will weave his way into the holes inside him and never leave.  

 

He expects it, the punch that nearly takes his jaw off, but somehow it still surprises him. He deserves that, wholeheartedly, and waits for another that doesn’t come.

 

One tear escapes Naruto’s eye before he angrily swipes it away. He’s shaking but not speaking, which is scarier than anything he could possibly do next. A quiet Naruto is horrifying and capable of anything.

 

“Tell me you mean that and I’ll go.” Naruto says after a while. Deathly calm. It shouldn’t be like this. He should be waving him off with a wink and a smile. He shouldn’t be grinding their love into the ground in the hopes that Naruto won’t look back.  “I won’t bother you again. All you have to do is say that you mean it.” His face is all wrong and Sasuke hates himself for being the cause of it. He’s too beautiful for words and Sasuke wishes—he wishes—

 

He’s not sure what he wishes. He just wants anything other than this.

 

The world’s falling from beneath his feet, but he has to let him go.

 

“I mean it.”

 

Naruto swallows and looks away, nodding once to himself. He sees him bite his lip, almost smiling in pure disbelief and Sasuke knows that the other boy knows that he’s lying. But it was said, and affirmed, and he’s marked to prove it, so he’s going to take Sasuke’s word for it.

 

“Okay.” And that’s that. He can almost feel the tether break, and he fights himself not to reach back out for its frayed ends.  

 

He stares at the fluttering curtain that halos the open window until the sun comes up, finally finding enough strength in his legs to stand. He looks out, knowing he won’t find anyone standing there, but he looks anyway.

 

All that’s out there is the wind, shapeless and free as always, and he likes to pretend that Naruto let himself get carried away with it.

 

He sets the lock and goes back to bed.

 

* * *

 

 

**C.**

  
They’ve moved again, this time to an abandoned row of warehouses in the middle of nowhere. They’d been traveling for weeks, moving just outside another small town until they hit a tall row of wildflowers that have reclaimed the wide expanse of concrete and wires. Sasuke marvels at it, running his hands softly through as they pass, biting down a smile as he sees other hands outstretched as they walk in front of him.

 

He takes to sitting in the half-broken rafters, looking out between the gaps in the wood and ignoring the ambient chatter below. He hasn’t seen another soul for miles. It was days ago when he saw some weary travelers that paid them no mind as they passed. It truly is different up here, since people in the Capitol would question why such a large group was traveling together. He wonders what horrors they’ve seen, to ask nothing.

 

He’s studying the way the grass moves when someone calls out to him below.

 

“Yo, Sasuke!” Kiba says, waving him down. Tenten stands next to him, smiling openly. He wonders what they want, since he was public enemy number one just this morning. Still, suspicious as he is, he swings his legs over and drops down in front of them.

 

“Hm? What is it?”

 

Tenten pats his shoulder and smiles wider. “Naruto wants to talk to you.”

 

Oh? What’s changed? Is he actually going to be ousted, or knocked over the head and wake up to a firing squad? How bleak, but as he said, he’s not feeling too confident.

 

It must show on his face, because Kiba laughs and Tenten shakes her head.

 

“its fine, it’s fine. He’s finally decided to stop being an ass and accept you back, I promise. There’s some important things he needs to say first before we move forward, though.” Tenten assures. Kiba nods in confirmation and starts pushing him over to the small office where Naruto’s set up a makeshift war room. Sasuke hadn’t been inside yet, and somehow it feels like he’s being sent to the principal's office.

 

“He was never really angry anyway,” Kiba adds. “He’s just really fucking stubborn but you know that already.”

 

Debatable.

 

Still, Sasuke’s going to go because they can’t go on like this forever. Not to mention that he’s lonely and desperate.

 

He must have passed some test he wasn’t aware he was taking between yesterday and today, but he’ll try his best not to complain about it. Outwardly, at least.

 

He knocks, even though it’s slightly ajar. He expects for it to be just the two of them, but instead he finds that Sakura and Lee are sitting together, hand in hand and he stutters awkwardly in the doorway. Part of him is offended that Naruto still won’t have a private conversation with him but he’s gets the distinct impression that this isn’t exactly that.

 

“Sit.” Naruto says, arms crossed as he leans against an aging desk. Sasuke dutifully sits, swiveling his head this way and that to make eye contact with everyone so he can figure out what’s going on. Lee sends him a reassuring smile, but Sakura’s uncomfortable and stiff.  

 

Naruto purses his lips and clicks his teeth, seeming to struggle with what he wants to say. Sasuke leans back in his seat and waits.

 

“The others seem convinced that you check out, so I’m inclined to believe them.” He says after a time, rolling his eyes skyward. He’s always known, but to see it up close how tightly Naruto can hold onto a grudge makes his lips spasm into an almost smile. Sasuke blinks at him and waits for him to continue.

 

“And that’s fine. We always need extra hands.” Ouch. “But if you’re going to be with us, _really_ with us, there’s some things you need to know.”

 

Now he starting to get freaked out a bit. He surveys the room again but no one’s giving anything away.

 

“Alright.” he replies.

 

Naruto sighs heavily and rubs his temples. He wonders what could be so important that it’s stressing him so.

 

“How much did Kidomaru tell you?” Naruto asks.

 

“Nothing at all, really. We didn’t get that far. He only told me that there was an “unbelievable” driving force that served as the method to your madness.”

 

Naruto smiles briefly, no teeth, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He pushes off of the desk and rounds it to rummage in one of its drawers. Sakura takes a deep breath from her place on the right and Lee rubs her shoulder in comfort. What the hell?

 

A picture. It’s a picture he produces. A scenic background with a huge white birch, rope swing frozen in time. Sakura sits on it in a sundress, smiling wide with a child on her lap. Golden curls bounce in the wind and the little girl’s smile rivals the sunshine.

 

He….doesn’t understand.

 

Sasuke raises his eyes in question after staring at the photo for far too long. Naruto’s watching in with a guarded expression and his eyelids twitch when they make eye contact.

 

“Who’s this?” He asks dumbly. Is it stupid if he truly has no idea?

 

Naruto doesn’t answer at first, looking first at Sakura and then at Lee. They both give nods of confirmation and Naruto’s sighing heavily through his nose before turning his attention back to him.

 

“Our daughter. Sakura and I. Hanami.” He says, like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

 

It’s instinct to immediately deny it. That doesn’t happen, not for them. They aren’t human and there’s no way. Built, not born, is what they’ve always said. Always believed. They were created to serve a purpose and were lesser beings to their human counterparts.

 

But, staring at the photo, he knows it to be true. He can see the both of them in her; in her upturned eyes, her wide smile, her tanned skin and blonde hair. It’s impossible. Unbelievable. A miracle that could change everything they’ve ever known. Their very society was built on the idea that the synthetic beings were soulless servants, created to obey, and assembled in a factory somewhere far off and magical. But this, this destroys the idea that they are little more than talking appliances.

 

If Sakura can give birth, does that mean—?

 

What does that mean? His brain is firing off rapidly in too many directions and he can’t settle on one concrete answer.

 

“Most people wouldn’t believe it.” Naruto says quietly. Sasuke feels like he’s been dragged back to the present at the sound of his voice. He was tumbling through time, remembering moments that make more sense now, with context.

 

A memory: His voice has just started getting deeper and his mother smiles every time his voice cracks. His father tends to frown at it,

 

—for some reason.

 

Was he—? Were _they_ —?  Did he—?

 

 _“_ But I knew you would.” He finishes. There’s meaning behind that, something well-guarded and well taken care of, even after so long, but Sasuke’s reeling and he can’t process much of anything right now.

 

The breath’s been knocked out of him and he feels like he might pass out. Finally, after ages, he can meet Naruto’s eyes again. The other man looks away, shying from his gaze, and Sasuke still doesn’t understand everything, it seems.

 

Another side of him, something he wants no part of at the moment, can’t ignore that it’s their child. That Naruto got what—who—he wanted, like Sasuke figured he would. He was never jealous of the affection Naruto had for her, knew it would come to a head one day, but now the fruits of their union eat at his insides like a rat in a bucket. He feels it clawing and his blood’s rising so much that it nearly chokes him.

 

“This is...amazing, Naruto.” He manages to say over the fire and brimstone blooming in his head. “This is life changing. I can’t—I don’t even know what to say.”

 

Naruto nods absently. He looks distracted, almost lost. Old pain flaring across his face. All at once, Sasuke understands and his heart drops to his feet.

 

It’s Sakura who confirms it a moment later, voice shaky and strained. “It’s okay. No one really does.” She pauses, closing her eyes and leaning into Lee for comfort. “She’s gone, though. We lost her three years ago in an ambush. She’d just turned two. It wasn’t long after that photo was taken.”

 

_Oh._

 

There was no other reality. It wasn’t like they could hide a child from him while living in such close quarters. She’d have to be elsewhere or dead. Still, he’s bitter that he never got the chance to know her, to love her, and he mourns for all that he’s missed.

 

Naruto lost his _child_ , a child they were all certain couldn’t exist, and Sasuke never knew.

 

He shuts his eyes at the tell-tale signs of tears.

 

It’s silent. His heart’s beating too rapidly in his chest and he wonders if the others can hear it, too.

 

Eventually, he looks up again, meeting Naruto’s eyes head-on with steely resolve. He was already sure before they told him that he wanted to be all in, but now there’s nowhere else he can be after learning the truth.

 

“What more do we need to do?” He asks. Naruto nods at him, eyes alight.

 

“There’s more proof we need,” Is the answer he gets. “Papers, records. We know where they are but they’re a bitch to get to. There’s proof that this cover-up goes all the way up the totem pole and the people deserve to know about it. We still have her...bones and her DNA, so we can present that too. And…” He trails off, turning to Sakura. Finally, she smiles a matching smile with Lee, and it’s so sickeningly sweet that Sasuke almost smiles back even though he’s devastated.

 

“I’m pregnant.” She says, almost sheepishly. “Not too far along. I’m not supposed to be fighting but we don’t have much of a choice.”

 

It feels strange to say good words after learning that her first child died, but he smiles and says: “Congratulations.” All the same.

 

Lee stands, still smiling, and comes to shake Sasuke’s hand. “It’s such a relief that you now know, my friend! It’s very hard to keep secrets.” Sasuke nods because he doesn’t have an answer for that, and indulges Lee when he swoops in for a hug. It’s not so bad, though, since he feels wanted again. He lets Sakura do the same. She holds on for a little longer, pressing her face into his chest and he tightens his grip when he hears a suspicious sniff. They stand like that for a while, him holding her as gently as he can and her using him as a handkerchief, but eventually they break away and he finds her teary smile to be beautiful.

 

When they exit, it’s just him and Naruto, standing awkwardly, not quite looking at each other. Naruto blows a raspberry with his mouth and runs a hand through his hair.

 

“So now you know.” He says solemnly and really, what more is there to say?

 

Sasuke has plenty, starting with: “I’m sorry.” He’ll maybe follow it up with an “it kills me that I couldn’t be there for you” and also “It’d be great if I wasn’t such a fuck up.”

 

“Don’t be.” Naruto replies dismissively. He must be used to the pity that comes with the revelation of a dead child, and Sasuke doesn’t want to annoy him with his sympathies. Still, he has to say something, right?

 

“You certainly couldn’t do anything about it. I couldn’t do anything about it. It’s just the way life goes, I guess.” That’s too flippant for someone as outspoken and emotional as him, but he knows that the years have been hard so he won’t push. The way he grieves is all his own and Sasuke has no dominion over that.

 

He dares to step closer, and Naruto watches him with cautious eyes and a blatant defensive stance. What he thinks Sasuke would possibly do to him right now, he’s not sure, but he makes sure to stop right outside of touching distance.

 

—He can tell,

Just by a look

They're both so terribly disappointed

At the acres between them.

 

He can’t help himself. His emotions get the better of him, and even though he doesn’t want to pick at old scabs, he can’t help but admit:

 

“I really would have liked to meet her.”

 

He really would have. A sweet girl with Naruto's face and Sakura’s charm? He would have been head over heels.

 

Naruto swallows thickly and looks down at the floor. His hands snake out and grip at Sasuke’s sleeves. He doesn’t quite lean into him, but its close. Sasuke feels his breath catch and he forces himself to stay still.

 

“I... really wanted that, you have no idea.” He confesses. All Sasuke wants to do is hold him, massage away his pain and his fears, but he’s not sure if his touch will be welcome.

 

“Can I...hug you?” Naruto asks quietly, still not looking at him. He guesses he has his answer.  

 

Sasuke doesn’t wait, pulling him closer. Naruto’s arms settle around his waist and his head against Sasuke’s chest. They stay like that, in silence, until Naruto jokes:

 

“If you tell anyone about this, I’ll have to kill you. I have an image to uphold.” Sasuke chuckles and Naruto responds by gripping him tighter.

 

“Okay. I promise.” He’s afraid for a moment that Naruto will make a jab about how his promises never amounted to much, but he doesn’t.

 

At that thought, he feels the guilt start to eat him alive again. He feels the need to explain himself, even though this might not be the right moment. He has to take the opportunity, since Naruto’s vulnerable right now and he might close off and ignore him again once he’s calmed down.

 

“Naruto, you know I-” he starts, but Naruto huffs and cuts him off. He shifts until his lips are pressed against Sasuke’s neck, making him shudder.

 

“Yeah I know you didn’t mean it, asshole.” Naruto replies, stale as ever. Even still, he can read his mind like no one else. Or, it was bound to come up, since it was the last words they said to each other some ten odd years ago. “Do you know how pissed I was that I fell for the bait? I know you only said that shit so I would leave because you’re always so irritatingly noble and protective of me. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to kill you and just might have if I didn’t leave right then but I _get_ it, okay? So just shut the fuck up and let me hug you, you bastard.”

 

Sasuke laughs into his hair, a little glad that Naruto didn’t let him apologize just then. He just wants to stand here and feel his warmth, let himself get swept away by the feelings pulsing inside him that he tried so hard to forget.

 

“I missed you.” He breathes, and he hears Naruto suck in a breath. The other man stiffens for a second, and Sasuke wonders if he said the wrong thing. But then Naruto’s settled back down onto his shoulder like nothing happened.

 

“I missed you too, asshole.” He sighs softly and Sasuke pretends like he doesn’t notice the budding blotch that soaks into his shoulder.

 


	5. Two Ships

 

* * *

 

**Five.**

 

_I can only hope it’s true enough,_

_That every little thing I do for love,_

_Redeems me from the moments I deem worthy_ o _f_

_The worst things that I’ve done._

 

—Oh Glory, Panic at the Disco.

* * *

 

 

 

**A.**

 

“How many?” Naruto asks quietly, rifling through his pack as he waits for an answer.

 

“Ten in the front.” Sai answers, almost immediately.  “Same for the back. We were right; it isn’t as heavily guarded since the outpost is nearby. As long as they don’t call for reinforcements, we’re set.”

 

“Understood.”

 

Sasuke squats in the underbrush next to the others who are leading the assault, ready to strike when they’re given the word.

 

They’re after an armory, a large one at that, one that provides the main district with most of its munitions and tech. Originally it wasn’t a part of the plan, but Shikamaru learns through his tangled web of connections that someone’s creating a new type of tracker that will be a bitch to deal with once it’s out in the world, so they’ll take this little detour on the way to their big prize.

 

Sasuke asked, before, after holding his tongue long enough what this “prize” was, and he wasn't disappointed.

 

There’s a fortress, high up in the west, full of secrets and guarded like the tower of God. In a way, it is, since the rumor goes that it’s the Promised Land. Everything they need, everything they’ve fought for, everything they’ve _died_ for, lies hidden within its walls. Too bad it’s nearly impossible for them to gain entry.

 

But, he can’t think about that now. There’s more pressing matters to attend to. He’ll have plenty of time to worry about everything else later, once he’s assured that his—and hopefully, everyone else’s—heads remain firmly attached to shoulders by the end of this night.

 

The path to the entrance is vast, almost unnervingly so. Wide open sands and loose gravel that allow for no cover. Of course that’s why such a building was out here, so the lookouts could see any intruders coming. Sasuke’s used to dealing with less than ideal situations—if that wasn’t already apparent—so he’s not too worried about the approach. The idea of reinforcements sets him on edge. A battalion, fifty men deep, only two clicks away.  Way too close for comfort. That distance can be covered in no time and even with their skill and their might that many men might be a bit of a stretch. Sasuke doesn’t voice this, since he doesn’t want to seem rabbit- hearted on his first real outing. Even if he knows bad odds when he sees them.

 

“What do you think, Sasuke?” Naruto asks softly from his left, eyes trained forward on the movement of the soldiers at the base. Sasuke isn’t surprised; Naruto’s taken to asking his opinion on most things these days, once he accepted that he wasn’t a traitorous, murderous clone hell bent on sending them all to an early grave. Still, it says wonders of the renewed trust in him. Still fledgling, flightless, but there.

 

He’s come along to smaller scale operations as the weeks rolled on, usually to serve as support or as Naruto so eloquently put it, “an extra hand”, but he was never considered for the vanguard or to watch Naruto’s back. An array of emotions passed through him when Naruto told him to suit up earlier in the evening with a smirk and a shrug. He maybe felt...whole, for the first time in a long time, but wouldn’t voice such thoughts as not to be mocked for them. He’s sure the other man knows what he means, but they’re both notoriously terrible at dealing with delicate matters of the heart so for the moment he’ll keep it to himself.

 

“We’ve faced worse odds.” Sasuke says after a moment, shrugging. Gaara shifts beside him, nearly grumbling, but Sasuke pays him no mind. They at least tolerate each other now—after months together in this uneasy alliance—but Sasuke knows that Gaara’s still sore about Sasuke occupying what the other man considers to be his “spot”.

 

Which happens to be on Naruto’s right.

 

Kiba clicks his tongue from behind them, eyes bright in the darkness. “You’ve got that right. But it’s way too open; I think we need to be a little more covert, here.”

 

“Agreed.” Lee replies quietly. “How do you want to proceed, Naruto?”

 

Naruto faces forward and considers, eyes darting back and forth as he runs through scenarios in his head. Somewhere in there he must like what he sees, so he turns back with a twinkle in his eye that wasn't present before.

 

“How good are you with a sniper rifle?” Naruto questions Sasuke, tilting his head with a smirk. Sasuke can’t help but smirk back, feeling excitement seeping into his bones despite the severity of the situation.

 

“If you’re asking if I can curve bullets in the air, I can’t. But anything else? I’m good for.” He knows the rumors that surround Hunters like him. Legendary. Otherworldly. He’s heard that some are even able to split bullets midair to hit multiple targets at the same time. Most of it is bullshit; they get specialized training, sure, but they aren’t able to break the laws of physics no matter how good they are.

 

Shikamaru chuckles quietly at him, rolling his eyes. Naruto lets out a bit of a snort and pushes against his shoulder good-naturedly.

 

“Good. Gaara’s a great shot too, so the both of you should go join Sai on the Bird’s Eye and pick off the ones in the front as quietly as possible. Can you do that?”

 

He almost wants to ask if Naruto’s lost it, since Gaara’s more likely to turn the gun on him rather than work side by side. Naruto is fully aware of this, since he—and everyone else— have to pull them apart often after too many heated words and petty arguments. He must think this is a good chance for them to “bond.” Whatever that means. But Sasuke doesn’t want to cause friction when Naruto’s trusting him with something important, so he doesn’t comment. Gaara clearly isn’t pleased either, but he keeps silent. They share a long suffering look that almost feels something like camaraderie when Naruto waves them off impatiently, but then Gaara’s brow is furrowing again and he’s stomping away to take the lead while Sasuke can only sigh and follow behind him.

 

Sai is happy to see him, at least. Sasuke still finds him strange and tone-deaf at the best of times, but his sort-of lookalike has taken a shine to him as they spent more time together.

 

“I know you and Chuckles over there wanted to charge in with the chief but this will be better, you know? Less likely to get shot from up here.” He jests.

 

Sai’s taken to calling him Chuckles once they became more comfortable, familiar.

 

He really doesn't care for it.

 

“Shut up.” Gaara rumbles, and Sasuke ignores the both of them in favor of setting up his gun.

 

They lay flat, watching and waiting for the perfect chance to strike. Gaara’s eyeballing him out of the corner of his eye, body wound tight like a bowstring.

 

“Don’t miss.” He says dryly. Sasuke snorts, sending him an amused look.

 

“Oh, I won’t.”

 

The soldiers in the distance move in odd patterns. Not in formation, like they should be. Sasuke frowns as he watches through his scope. He can’t help but weigh their disorganization against his own training.

 

When he was charged with keeping watch back in the Capitol, they moved with purpose. No man out of place. No holes and no gaps in their positions, and certainly no leaning and fraternizing. It’ll make things easier for him since they’re quite lax and spread out, but he can’t help but be a bit disappointed at their weak showing.

 

He spots a straggler taking a piss by a bush. Probably drunk. A shame. He aims, holding steady for a few minutes to make sure he truly will hit his mark, and...He hesitates.

 

—What happened to no blood, Sasuke?

As few casualties as possible?

How quickly your tune changes

While lost to the crowd.

 

Naruto voice rings clear through his comm, instinctively knowing who Sasuke would aim for first, startling him. “Do you have a shot?”

 

“Yes.” He says, cursing himself for losing focus.

 

“Good. Take it.”

 

The force of it knocks the man cleanly in the bush with barely a whisper, out of sight from anyone wandering by. Kiba whistles low in his ear, impressed, and Sasuke feels his lip lift in the trace of a smile. Gaara grunts, nodding to the skill behind it, but his bias won’t allow for any encouraging words. Not that Sasuke needs them, but he’s mature enough to praise the other man when he fires off two in rapid succession, taking down the guards in the tower before they can even shout in surprise.

 

The others below them slowly begin to move as they carve out a path. Sasuke waits patiently, only taking shots he's positive he can make. He leaves it to Gaara to be more reckless, since the other man is clearly using the opportunity to work off some aggression. Sasuke would like it if he'd figure out how to do such thing _without_ a gun in his hands, but he'll take what he can get.

 

Soon enough, the others have quietly covered enough ground to slip inside unnoticed, so Sasuke presses up off of his belly and grabs a pair of binoculars, eyes searching the surrounding darkness for any newcomers or the dreaded reinforcements.

 

“Everything good in there?” Sai asks over the comm after a while, since the others are officially out of sight.

 

“Roger.” Shikamaru sounds back, voice low in a stage whisper. “We're close to the lab, I think.”

 

“Alrighty! Keep it clean, gentlemen.”

 

Nothing moves, save for the slight breeze rustling the trees ever so often, but Sasuke scans the empty expanse repeatedly, just to make sure. He wonders if he was always this paranoid, or if recent events have ratcheted up his anxiety to a fever pitch. Makes sense, with everything that's occurred in the last three or so months. He hasn't had time to sit and fully absorb it all, since every moment he spent searching kept him on edge and every moment he's spent since has only make it worse.

 

Gaara notices his incessant searching, eyeballing him again with almost open contempt. Sasuke tries to ignore him but that doesn't seem like it's going to work, this time.

 

“Tell me,” He mutters in that grating voice of his, “Why did you come here?”

 

Sasuke blinks before pulling away from the lenses to regard him fully.

 

“Why?” he repeats slowly, not fully understanding. He thought himself obvious. “They're my friends too, Gaara. We all swore we'd do anything for each other. I think this counts as “anything”, does it not?”

 

Gaara frowns deeper, staring daggers at him like he said the wrong thing. That's no surprise, since it seems he does that often when the other man is involved. No question answered thoroughly enough, no reason good enough. It's exhausting to clear the hurdles that have been unevenly spaced between them, so that's why Sasuke rarely bothers.

 

“You swore? Ha. I know what your oaths amount to, so forgive me if I don't quite believe that.”

 

Ah.

 

Sasuke figured as much. Such contempt was born somewhere. Naruto must have gifted it to him in his darkest hours, when his bitterness towards Sasuke bubbled over like a witch's brew, slow cooked and ghastly.

 

Still, it seems unfair to be hated for a slight that isn't Gaara’s concern. He wishes things were different of course, he wishes he never went back on his promise, but he was young and afraid and confused and he doesn't see the point of forever being the villain over one mistake.

 

Except, it wasn't one mistake, was it? He let himself be swayed by his father’s power, broke bonds he swore he never would, lived in fear even as he was smothered by the strength of those around him, just to end up as the enemy, as something hated by his kind since he hunted them down and kept the peace the humans wanted, never flinching away from killing his own neighbors and familiar faces because he was _told_ to.

 

Even if he's told himself this time and time again--so many times in the cover of night when there was no one around to hear—he doesn't want these fresh scabs thrown in his face by a mere boy with a bad case of hero worship. Gaara’s vision is black and white; there are those who are good and those who are not. Mistakes aren't allowed with this kind of outlook, something Sasuke picked up on easily since such angry eyes were focused on him from the moment he tumbled into view, but just because Gaara doesn't believe in gray areas doesn't mean they don't exist.

 

“I told you before what my mission was, and why I was more than happy to abandon it. I haven't lied about anything, haven't hurt anyone, so what's not to believe?”

 

Gaara sneers. “Everything. You hurt Kankuro; he just stopped limping because of you. Beyond that, you don’t drop everything just for the fuck of it. Trained dogs don't bite their masters and always come back home.” At Sasuke’s silence, he continues. “After all this time you decided now was the time to rebel? Because of your friends were doing it? What was that old saying? Ah, ‘if your friends were to jump off a bridge, would you do it, too?’ is that it, your reasoning?”

 

To put it simply, yes.

 

—What purpose is there?

 To die alone?

 

Sasuke nearly spits out an angry retort before he hears Sai shift behind him, tense, and he reigns himself since he's sure Sai is expecting a fight. Maybe there should be one, but not right now. Gaara thinks he has him all figured out, if the slight victorious smirk is anything to go by.

 

There's more to it than that, much, much more but Sasuke doesn't have to explain himself to anyone, let alone some childish tagalong on borrowed time. He's not going to lose focus over this, since Gaara’s truly said worse to him before. Even though it stings because it's true: he let himself get swept away by the will of the others like he's done so many times before.

 

Except this time it isn't skipping lectures or stealing alcohol to try even though one bottle wasn't going to get them anywhere near drunk. This time people are dying and they're risking their lives to change the world even though, after all their work, after all their pain and their sacrifices, it might not _want_ to change. All this might be for naught and Sasuke can't say a word because he's happy enough to just be fucking included.

 

Pathetic.

 

Sasuke turns away from him, picking up his binoculars once more and scanning for movement. Gaara snorts, somewhat amused, and lays back down to watch through his scope.

 

“I'm right, aren't I?” He goads. Sasuke hears Sai’s frustrated clicking of teeth. He was probably hoping the conversation would be dropped once Sasuke stopped responding, but when have the two of them ever handled anything in a reasonable way?

 

“Admit it to me and to yourself. You're a coward and you have no backbone, always relying on someone else to tell you where to go and what to do. Naruto’s good at that, and he’s generous to even those with the weakest of wills. He only keeps you around because you'll die without someone holding your leash.”

 

“Enough, Gaara!” Sai hisses. “I think you've said enough.”

 

It's rare for Sai to drop his jovial manner of speech, even for a moment, so Sasuke can't help his surprise when the other man’s octave dips dangerously low. Whether it's in defense of Sasuke, or an attempt to keep the peace, he can't be sure.

 

“Its fine, Sai.” Sasuke reassures. It's not. He wants to bash Gaara’s skull in and throw his body down the cliff, but he fucking doesn't and he won't. “He can say what he wants.”

 

He looks at Gaara then, hating the smug air that surrounds him like a cape. He must think that Sasuke’s not rising to his prodding like usual because he's right, instead of Sasuke being focused on the mission. It wouldn't be so bad to let him feel like he's won just this once, since:

 

“You don't know me. I don't expect you to, since a few months together isn't going to give you a clear idea. But don't speak of things you know nothing about.” He takes a steadying breath, willing his voice not to raise with righteous anger. “Whether Naruto pities me or not is our business. Our relationship is _our_ business, and no matter what you say or do you can't touch that, and I know it eats you up inside, doesn't it? You can think whatever you want about me but it doesn't change that Naruto _wants_ me here, and that everyone else does, too. So just shut the fuck up and keep watch, alright? We don't have time for this.”

 

He sees Sai’s face scrunch up in some awful mixture between smugness and pride, but he ignores it in favor of watching the dust and the trees again. Gaara grunts, wanting to say more, but he thinks better of it. Sasuke’s sure he hit the nail on the head, too, since Gaara’s got a tension thrumming through his body that wasn't there before, but he doesn't have time to gloat because he spots just about the last thing he wants to see.  

 

“Shit!” He hisses. “You see that?”

 

Gaara sucks his teeth, pressing the comm button so hard it creaks.

 

“How close are you all to being done?” He asks urgently.

 

“Nearly,” Naruto chimes. “Why, what's wrong?”

 

“We've got a party of six coming down from the North road. Gotta be from the outpost.” Sasuke reports.

 

“This isn’t part of the nightly patrol; it's too early for that.” Sai follow up with. “They might be suspicious since it's been quiet for too long. They're definitely going to be once they see that no one's out front.”

 

“Shit, alright. We'll hurry up. We need ten minutes, tops, and then we're good. Do we have it?”

 

“Maybe.” Sasuke answers. “They don't seem to be in a hurry, so we have a few more minutes until they arrive. It'll get sticky if they realize something is up, even more so if we take them out and someone else comes looking.”

 

“Understood. Stay sharp.” Naruto says firmly. The comm cuts out and Sasuke’s left with silence.

 

Gaara’s aiming at the oncoming car, laser focused and ready to strike.

 

“I say we shoot.” He says tersely. Sasuke grabs his gun tighter and shakes his head. A foolish idea, one that will not doubt bring the heat from the men stationed further down the way. Was he listening to anything they just said?

 

“They're going to notice, and then they're going to call for backup. If we end them here, it'll take a least another twenty minutes for the others to realize that they haven't returned, and we can be gone by then.”

 

“Or they're supposed to report back immediately and if they don't we're going to have to face the whole armada. Don't do anything stupid, let's wait it out and watch.” Sai counters with, and Sasuke’s treated to his lower, in command voice for the second time this night. He wonders if there's some tale of a former captain or squadron leader, hidden in the hills of his past he barely knows, because said edge is too firm to ignore and that's why Gaara only sucks his teeth and does little else.

 

Sasuke looks at Sai with a raised eyebrow, but all he gets in return is a too wide smile and knowing twinkle in his eyes.

 

The car pulls up. Six, no, seven men inside. All Model 4. The most common, up here and on Earth. Come to think of it, they haven’t encountered any other Synths on this outing. Most likely since it's widely believed that such beings shouldn't be placed so closely to highly sensitive materials, lest they fall to temptation. Pah.

 

They don't seem to be in a hurry to get out, and that only serves to make him nervous. Sasuke can see them clearly through his scope. They're making conversation. They don't seem concerned yet; maybe the lateness of the hour deems the distinct lack of guards unimportant. Thinking back on the disinterest the guards showed in actually protecting the place when they first arrived, maybe this isn't so strange to the newcomers.

 

Deeper still, if they checked the feedback loop before coming, they'd see regular patrolling in the interior thanks to Shikamaru, even if most of the guards inside are dead as well. The barrier drones are disabled too, yet their red beacons still blink like eyes in the night. There's really no reason for these other guards to be here, since everything seemingly checks out. Sasuke’s already set alight, but as he tries to figure their reasoning he only gets more and more agitated.

 

One of them hops out suddenly, bringing a walkie to his mouth. He's staring upward, looking towards something. What's up there? Sasuke wonders, but remembers coldly that there's a watchtower in that direction. Shit! No one will answer up there since Gaara took them out earlier.

 

The Four below stops, cocking his head and looking at his walkie in confusion. He tries again, and even though he's faced away from them, Sasuke can tell that the man is starting to feel that something isn't right.

 

“Shit!” Sai mumbles, aiming his own weapon just as the Synth below is starting to draw his. The others in the car lean out, questioning and the first turns to say something to them. He doesn't get the chance to finish, since Naruto and the others decide that this is the exact moment to exit the facility.

 

There's an alarmed shout —he’s not sure from which party — and the men in the car start to move as one, trying to exit and attack as quickly as possible. Kiba, in the front, skids to a stop, reaching behind himself to bring out his weapon. He sees Naruto tense from his place down below and shift into a defensive stance.

 

Sasuke sees what's going to happen with startling clarity. The one with the walkie is going to call for backup, there's going to be gunfire, and with the reduced party numbers that were chosen for this outing, they're not going to get out of here unscathed. He doesn't have time to think, only act.

 

He can't get that many shots off so quickly. Not possible. Even with Sai and Gaara as backup, they won't put them down before the alarm is sounded. He can feel that Gaara’s certainly going to try next to him, and Sai isn't given up just yet either. Valiant, but fruitiness.

 

Time moves in slow motion as everyone down below goes for their weapons. Sasuke won't risk casualties on a detour like this, not when the prize is in clear view, so he surprises everyone but himself when he aims straight for the gas tank and slams his finger on the trigger like it personally offended him.

 

It ignites, taking the Fours right along with it in a groaning red plume set against the night sky. A phoenix, crying out as it curls and burns.

 

It’ll no doubt be seen by the reinforcements. Inevitable. But it had to be done. They didn't have time to be caught up here. Sasuke ignores his own recklessness, already pushing up and grunting out a gravelly “Move!” To a blinking Sai and a mute Gaara.

 

They snap out of it quickly enough, making their way down the hill single file and hurried. It feels like one second to the next before they're reunited with the others, who have crossed back to the cover of the underbrush in long strides.

 

“Twice you've saved my ass from being shot in the face, man.” Kiba says with a wide grin that Sasuke can't help but return. “Remind me to buy you something nice.”

 

“Don't thank me,” He can't help but say, already berating himself on how he could have handled that better. Danzo would be so disappointed in him for feeling even a moment's worth of panic.

 

He jerks, wondering why he'd be thinking of that shitty old man at a time like this.

 

“It was too flashy; they'll have seen that, but we've got time to escape so let's go if we're ready.”

 

“Did we get what we came for?” Sai asks, already turning to make a quick escape.

 

“And more.” Shikamaru confirms, notes of excitement creeping into his tone. It must be good, to get the normally reserved man’s mold to break. “This will make things much easier in the days to come, but let's get the fuck out of here before we talk about it, yeah?” He says as they all break out into a full sprint.

 

It's stupid, as they're running through the woods, to whoop and holler as they do, but they do it anyway, too revved up and enlivened to hold it in. They could be caught, hunted down by the heavy beat of their boots and the sing-song of their voices in this victorious melody, but they do it anyway.

 

Naruto keeps pace with him near the front of the pack, smiling bright, head throw back in childlike laughter and Sasuke can't stop staring as they run together in time. Kiba’s saying something encouraging, Sai calling back something worse, and even Gaara’s low chuckling warms him in the strangest of ways while they all share their victories with the heavens.

 

It should feel odd to celebrate carnage, shouldn't it? He should be ashamed of what they have to do to scrape out tiny fragments of freedom, shouldn't he? But, Sasuke’s done enough of that to last a lifetime, so he doesn't, and he won't. He's going to tumble and laugh with his brothers and light up the night even more when they get back to base.

 

Still, he can't help but sober a bit. It's in his nature, after all. He can't help but thinking back to Gaara’s earlier words. Would he do it? Jump if everyone else did so? Looking around him, at the matching scars they wear, the emblems emblazoned across their chests, it seems that he already has.

 

After all, what's the purpose of dying—and living— alone?

* * *

 

 

**B.**

 

A scream cuts through the silent night like a loud lash of a whip. Sharp. Echoing. First, it’s a scream, then a moan, then a whimper. Then it’s nothing, and the air settles back down with a sigh. The electric buzz of the streetlights sounds louder than before. Maybe because it’s so quiet now.

 

Those on the main street mull around despite the late hour, oblivious. No one comes to check for trouble. No one comes to look.

 

No one ever does.

 

Sasuke wakes with a scream on his lips, just barely catching it before he cries out into the darkness of his room and swallows it back down. His throat is dry and his eyes watery; he’d been dreaming that he was drowning, water filling up his lungs and choking him, forcing its way down his throat. His eyes were burning and stabbed out. He couldn’t see anything. It’s nothing like that when he wakes. The opposite. The juxtaposition is almost funny in his mind for absolutely no reason at all.

 

Last night, Sasuke killed a man for the first time.

 

Or, he should say this morning since it’s only been hours. The clock to his right says it’s 5:41am, meaning he’s only gotten two and a half hours of sleep until the horror rose in his throat again and he’s jolted awake with a shiver and a sob.

 

Two short years since the start of his training—two decades old now—yet he feels like he's still hiding in his mother's skirts compared to the men in his company. He doesn't think he should have been brought along just yet, since he's a buck compared to these wolves. The trainees get more time, more simulations before direct action in the field. But because of who his father is, he expected.

 

Expected to be ready, to be better than the rest of the lower ranks, expected to swallow down his fear in the face of danger even though it's nowhere near beaten out of him yet.

 

What a joke.

 

The mission presented to him was fairly straight forward. Danzo prattled on as such for what felt like hours. Sasuke zones out, subtly taking in his surroundings. All the grizzled veterans are paying rapt attention, nodding here and there, standing stocky and firm like a forest of redwoods.

 

They're after a cell that manufactures and sells illegal weapons. Snyths. Model 4’s that have gone under the radar for a while. The government isn't too kind to those that mess with their bottom line, especially rebellious skinjobs that could potentially arm a revolution. It's a wonder they haven't been caught before now.

 

There's another boy present — he can't consider himself a man yet, so he won't consider this other one either — who looks bored out of his mind and like he wishes to be anywhere else. He catches Sasuke’s gaze and gives an exaggerated eye roll in Danzo’s direction to convey his disinterest in it all, smirking and pressing fingers to his head like he's holding a gun.

 

Sasuke smiles softly at him, smothering a chuckle so they won't be caught during their secret conversation. The other boy grins when he sees, visibly pleased that someone shares his feelings.

 

A shock of white hair. Sharp teeth. Sasuke thinks he looks a little like a shark. He's seen him around before, here and there.

 

Definitely at the academy, but they were never in the same hallways or lectures. He can't recall his name but Sasuke knows he's strong, able. He'd have to be, to be released into duty this early as well.

 

Sasuke turns away so he doesn't press his luck. He knows he's favored, but he feels like Danzo doesn't like him much even though they haven't interacted outside of meetings or briefings. There's something about the old man’s gaze that's just plain unnerving.

 

He catches a strange, intense look from the other boy out of the corner of his eye, and he tries to think nothing of it.

 

“That's it. Shoot on sight. Is that understood?” Danzo finishes, looking around as the soldiers shout their confirmation. He nods, pleased, and then stares at Sasuke and beckons him forward.

 

“Sasuke,” he says, staring down in a way that makes him want to flinch. He's flanked by two giant menacing meatbags who look like they eat bricks for breakfast. Sasuke doesn't want to ask what story all their scars tell, sure he won't like the answer. “You'll be with Ibiki and Kakuzu.”

 

Ah. The meatbags have names. Of course.

 

He addresses the two men directly. “I'd rather he not see combat if you can help it. But do what you must. Either way, this is good experience.”

 

They don't look happy at that but why should they? It's basically babysitting for him to be here.

 

“Understood.” They say in unison. When Danzo departs, Kakazu looks at him with sneer and grumbles at him to keep up. Sasuke tries not to tumble on his own feet.

 

A man named Kotetsu calls out to Ibiki. “Stop looking like that, Pincushion!” He shouts, causing some of the other men to laugh around them. What a terrible nickname but, looking at his face, it makes sense. “It’s not so bad, just make him carry your extra ammo! That's what mine is doing!” Sasuke looks over to see the boy grumbling, and smothers another laugh.

 

They move in as one, group after group.

 

“Watch and learn, newbie.” The white haired boy says to him proudly. Sasuke feels his face contort, confused. Isn't he just as new?

 

“We aren't supposed to do anything?” Sasuke whispers back in slight question, voice rising due to his discomfort.

 

“If you keep thinking like that, you'll never stand out.” He chides.

 

Sasuke isn't sure that he wants to.

 

“Stop whispering back there like a bunch of girls.” Ibiki barks. Sasuke can't help but start at his gruff voice and the white haired boy flicks off the bigger man's back.

 

“Leave ‘em be.” Kakazu murmurs. “They're probably scared shitless.”

 

“As if.” the boy mumbles. He turns his head to address Sasuke. “The name’s Suigetsu.”

 

“Sasuke.” He replies.

 

“Yeah, I know.”

 

He does?

 

That intense look is back and Sasuke raises an eyebrow in question but Suigetsu doesn't get the chance to respond.

 

“Shit!” One of the enemy Synths call out as he spot the soldiers making their way through the base. He tries to back into the room he just exited, but is shot almost immediately, gurgling around the bullet in his neck.

 

It's loud, deafening almost. Sasuke fights the urge to gasp as the man dies right in front of him. Not his first time seeing death up close, but it doesn't get easier.

 

Suigetsu pulls Sasuke’ gun out of his waistband and places it in his hands, giving him a meaningful look as he goes for his own. Sasuke grips it, swallow thickly and moving behind the hulking men in his company for cover.

 

It's chaos from there. The enemy is disorganized, off guard. They go down easy enough and Sasuke doesn't have to raise his gun once while they're picked off. He almost feels relief, since he's not sure he can. Suigetsu's enjoying himself— a little too much—going for glory rather than gain. Sasuke hopes he won't get himself killed in the process. He sticks close to Ibiki like he's told and is tasked with destroying the illegal weapons that are strewn about the compound.

 

The room they enter is empty, save for the paraphernalia filling it. They most likely have stumbled across the vault, if the sheer number is anything to go by. Sasuke spreads the kindle around, ready to burn the offending material when given the word.

 

It seems like a waste to burn it all. There might be use for these weapons, like repurposing or scrapping. It's not Sasuke’s call, so he’ll do as he’s told.

 

Suddenly, there's a flash, and Ibiki’s going down with a bullet in his side. Sasuke shouts, ducking instinctively, and he tries not to piss himself when he's face to face with high powered gun.

 

“Not the kid.” Ibiki groans out, surprisingly, gripping the offender’s leg.

 

There's an old man behind that gun, one that Sasuke unexpectedly recognizes, and they both stare at each other in shock.

 

Jiraiya, he's called. An old jester who handed them candy on their way to the academy, weirdly flirting with the girls. For years he sat on the side of the road, playing tunes and telling jokes for as long as Sasuke can remember. He has a booming laugh and an easy smile and Sasuke can't _fucking_ believe that he makes illegal weapons and fights against the government in between entertaining kids. He feels like he's choking since—Jesus, Naruto would never believe this.

 

He feels an old stab of pain but ignores it, choosing instead to pick his jaw up off the floor.

 

“Kid?” Jiraiya mumbles, staring into Sasuke’s too wide eyes. “Bah. Why bring him along, then?” Ibiki doesn't get a chance to answer, since Jiraiya shoots him through the skull not a second later. His head explodes, splattering brain matter all over Sasuke’s shiny new boots. He fights not to add vomit to that mix, horrified. He realizes from the mess that Ibiki was human.

 

Too soft. Too wet. Snyths don't die that way. It's more twitching and sparks—for the older models, at least— it’s less blood and shaky gasps. He swallows down a heavy lump in his throat, dragging his eyes back up to Jiraiya.

 

The old man is watching him silently, appraising.

 

“Human, huh?” He says. “I wouldn't have guessed with those muscles. They make ‘em too well these days, It's hard to tell.” He pauses, shrugging casually. “Sorry then, that you had to see that. Those fuckers pop like you wouldn't believe.”

 

At Sasuke’s silence, he continues with a heavy sigh, beckoning him forward. “C’mon then.”

 

“What?”

 

“Let's go. “ He grabs Sasuke arm and leads him out a secret passage that Sasuke hadn’t noticed. Of course he didn't notice! It's a secret passage and he feels dumb for thinking such things. “You shouldn't be here, I shouldn't be here, so let's go before those other steroid junkies catch up.”

 

Sasuke, like a fool, lets himself be lead, too caught up with the fact that Jiraiya is a traitor. Probably their leader, if his calm confidence is anything to go by. How? How can such a kind, warm man be an enemy of the state? How?!?!

 

He tugs his arm free once they spill out to a small, secluded courtyard. Jiraiya stops short with a sigh, turning at the sound of Sasuke’s gun cocking.

 

He looks disappointed. Not nearly as much as Sasuke feels, but it breaks his heart all the same.

 

“Stop.” He says awkwardly. At least his voice doesn't waiver. “Don't move; you're under arrest.”

 

—Shoot on sight, Sasuke!

That's what you're supposed to do.

Fucking shoot!

 

Jiraiya looks at him, not unkindly, tilting his head to the side in question.

 

“You know, I haven't seen any of the kids around lately.” He says, making Sasuke freeze. “Haven’t seen you around lately. They with you? The boys you were always with?  Hunters, I mean?”

 

“N-no.” He replies. “They're gone. Off world. It's been two years.”

 

Jiraiya smiles sadly, making his heart clinch. “So why aren't you with them, Sasuke? Why are you here?”

 

“I—” he can't answer. He...can't answer.

 

“I know. It's alright.” He stops, shaking his head slowly. “I figured. You always were the little prince of the group. Too bad that didn't open as many doors as you thought. Now you're all alone down here, left to rot in this shithole. I get it. Don't blame yourself for staying behind; not everyone is built for the colonies.”

 

He shakes his head, eyes clouded with memories that Sasuke would rather forget.

 

 “Still, this isn't you. You're not going to believe me, but maybe you'll get it soon. Soon every villain in the dark is going to be someone you know. It never ends. You'll see why, I guess. Things are changing.”

 

He shrugs, trailing off. Sasuke’s palms are sweaty and his hands are shaking. He knows that alright?!? He doesn't need anyone to tell him. So many of his kind unhappy, so much of this place falling apart. He thought himself ready for it, for the familiar faces walking down the wrong path. It's inevitable, since they're at the precipice—but clearly he was wrong.

 

Jiraiya produces something from behind his back, something that makes his eyes fill with tears even as he furiously bats then away.

 

A single peppermint.

 

Sasuke’s favorite.

 

“Say hi to the blonde brat for me, when you see him again. Don't be mad, but, he always was my favorite.”

 

He produces something else, a long serrated knife that's probably as old as he is, and he lunges.

 

Sasuke can't breathe, losing his balance from wobbly knees, falling in a heap next to Jiraiya's body. He's not going to cry, dammit, he's not! But he can't bring his legs to stand after repeated failed attempts. Kotetsu and the others find him like that, head bowed and lip trembling. He guesses it's the closest thing to pity, when Kotetsu helps him up and pats his shoulder gently.

 

“It's always shit the first time.” He says, shaking his head solemnly. “You’ll get the hang of it.”

 

Will he?

 

He blanks on the rest mostly. He sees Suigetsu again, covered in blood, and even he looks subdued. He raises a hand to comfort Sasuke, asking: “You okay?” In a voice he hasn't heard before. It must show on Sasuke’s face that he's not, for him to be gentle like that. He should say something back nice, or reassuring, but he can't.

 

Rattled and upset as he is, he snaps without meaning to.

 

“What do you care?” he grunts, turning away, Suigetsu sucks his teeth angrily, but shadows of hurt dance across his face under streetlight.

 

Danzo collects him before he gets too far, slinging a fatherly arm around his shoulder in what he guesses is supposed to be comfort.

 

“You took down the leader all on your own, I hear?” he asks. Sasuke nods, fighting not to flinch away as Danzo’s grip tightens and his smile lengthens into something predatory. Dangerous. “Good, good, my boy. I did have such high hopes for you.”

 

Sasuke stares at his feet as they march away. He digs in his pocket, pulling out the single peppermint that he's hidden there. His body heat has melted it; the red’s run off a bit, leaving only the white. Rounded. Blank. Colorless. He stares up at Danzo as he maps out his future, feeling colder than ever even though he's pressed up close.

 

He pops the candy in his mouth, trying not to bow under the weight of the older man’s expectations.

 

Ah.

 

How stale.

* * *

 

**C.**

 

This base is much better than the last few, Sasuke thinks. An old abandoned farmhouse, with nearly enough rooms so they don't have to be packed on top of each other like sardines. The water still runs and most of the windows are intact, so the night breeze isn't so bad when they try to sleep and no one has to trek miles for bit to drink.

 

It’s deadset in a long-dead cornfield, electric field still weakly buzzing to keep out the animals, even if they rarely pass through anymore.

 

It's perfect, since intruders can be seen coming from miles off. Not to mention that the electric field naturally interferes with the survey drones in the area. They did good, finding this one.

 

Sakura kisses them all on the cheek once they arrive back, overjoyed and unspeakably relieved. She's showing now, ever so, tummy round and full like she’s just finished a hearty dinner. She's sore at being left out of most runs these days, but knows it's for the best.

 

Sora and Tenten want a blow by blow of what went down, instantly caught up in their high spirits that haven't died down in the time it took them to return. Ino breaks out some wine that no one knew she had, and Sasuke wonders where on earth she could have stored it to hide it so well from greedy eyes.

 

Kimimaro approaches him while they're all patting each other on the back, quiet as ever, footsteps barely disturbing the floorboards.

 

“It went well?” He asks, dry and monotone. His eyes are bright through, shiny against his pale face.

 

“Very.” Sasuke confirms, smiling. Kimimaro features twist with something close to concern.

 

“You...are well?” He asks, and Sasuke pats his shoulder to confirm it.

 

“I am.”

 

Kimimaro smiles brilliantly. “Good. That’s good.”

 

Sasuke wonders when the Two began to care for him well, at all, but he guesses he doesn't give himself enough credit.

 

Shikamaru spills their haul on the front table, pointing out each perk and bounty that they've won for the day.

 

Plasma guns. Even more powerful than the one's they've got. Sasuke notes that the specs on these outweigh even the fanciest of tech he's seen in the Capitol. He whistles low in appreciation.

 

Trackers that run on organic and inorganic materials. A single hair or drop of blood and you can track a target virtually forever. He sees the value in snagging these; they’d be hard as hell to shake since their enemies no doubt have those kinds of samples on them.

 

Advanced grenades, bombs, throwing stars. The works. It sees that the owners of that armory were really gearing up for war. Against them, most likely. It's both impressive and vaguely worrying, that they had this much to take them down, but it also excites him in a way he can't explain. They're being taken seriously, at least.

 

“We melted down most of the shit we couldn't carry,” Kiba explains triumphantly, clueing them in on what went down on the inside, “Stole the plans too, so they'll be hard pressed to make more so quickly.”

 

He produces a stack of papers then, and Sasuke commends them on their smart thinking. They aren't idiots, after all, and none of this would mean much if they didn't put some type of wrench in the works.

 

There's something else. Small, silver, almost shaped like a simple handgun but Sasuke immediately knows that it's not.

 

“And this?” Temari asks, pointing to it.

 

“Not sure.” Naruto responds, shrugging. “We grabbed it because it was there but I'll be honest: I have no idea what's so special about it.”

 

Sasuke clears his throat, wincing when everyone's attention is on him. He knows what it is, seen it once before on a mission years ago. His first. As they sifted through the rubble they stumbled across some extraordinary illegal weaponry that shouldn't even _exist_ in this world, entirely too dangerous to fall into the wrong hands.

 

Why on god’s earth would it be _here_ , of all places? How could they plan to use such a thing? Was is reserved for them? No one could fire that anywhere safe, unless they planned to take half a town with it.

 

Here it is once again where it shouldn't be, since Sasuke wouldn't exactly consider their hands the right ones at the moment.

 

“I've seen it.” He says, trying to keep his voice steady and betray nothing. “I know what it is.”

 

“Oh yeah?” Naruto questions. “What is it, then?” He doesn't sound accusatory, not quite, but he's certainly interested.

 

Hmm. How to put this gently?

 

“Um, it's a...Anti-Matter gun?” He cringes again when eyes widen around him.

 

Kiba takes a long step back from the table, wary with due cause. “What?” He cries. “How the fuck is that even possible?”

 

Shikamaru frowns, face dark and worried. “Shit.” He says finally. Sasuke can't agree more. He hates that everyone's mirth died such a quick death— _because of him_ , his mind whispers— but this isn't something to play with.

 

“I came across it, once. Years ago. Some illegal weapons traders had one.” He ignores the names of the men he knows that died that day, “It's not cleared by any government agency to make. _Anywhere_. On earth or in the colonies. So for this to be here, in a government monitored storehouse—”

 

He trails off. Shikamaru finishes for him, connecting the dots.

“— Which means that they're probably buying unauthorized weapons off Synths. Interesting.”

They mull over that, to themselves. It's not exactly shocking. The government has always been the shadiest organization of all. This only adds to the growing list of unorthodox practices that the powers that be are guilty of. Like genocide. And slavery. The mistreatment of the cyborgs they claimed weren't human at all.

 

“Should we….get rid of it?” Lee questions, unsure.

 

Naruto looks at him again, asking silently what he thinks on the matter.

 

He...

 

Well,

 

“Maybe? It’s to be used as a Hail Mary of sorts. A last ditch effort. I've seen it fired exactly once and well, there's a reason why there’s a place that's been labeled “The Crater” by the townies back home.”

 

Naruto grimaces. “There's probably not a safe way to wash our hands of it right now. We run the risk of some random fuck stumbling across it if we leave it somewhere. We'll just have to be careful and hopefully never be desperate enough to consider using it.”

 

They lock it away in a bomb-proof safe, and everyone lets themselves get caught up in the thrill of their victory again in slow degrees.

 

Sasuke wants to mention that anti-matter doesn't qualify as a normal bomb, and if that things goes off, fuck all that weak safe is going to do to protect their precious atoms, but he lets them have it since there's nothing much that can be done.

 

He watches the revelry around him, drink loose in his palm, and tried to convince himself to relax. It's not working. At all. So instead of staying and being a downer about, well, everything, he quietly proclaims that he's going to keep watch outside. Just in case. They are wanted criminals after all.

 

They have wards in place for that. Protective measures taken so they don't have to stay up through the night on the battlements. Sometimes, it's better for a machine with a brain to keep watch, though.

 

No one hears him— the rambunctious laughter at some terrible joke drowns him out, joining the pile of chips on the floor as they play some card game he doesn't know.

 

He grabs a gun and silently makes his way outside. The night air is still cool. It whispers its secrets to him, picking up his hair like it wants to carry him away. He tilts his head back to watch the stars, leaning against the rickety white fence that bows slightly under his weight, and almost wishes that it would.

 

There's a creak from the rotting wood on the porch and that's the only thing that tells him someone's joined him, out here.

 

“Hey.” Naruto says, bounding down to stand beside him. It hits him then, that this is the second time in three months that they've been alone together. Not strange, since it's a family here and they're constantly crawling all over each other, but welcome. Welcome because there's so many things he wishes to say but feels stupidly shy when the others are watching.

 

“Hey.” He greets back, watching him through his lashes.

 

“What’s up?” Naruto asks. tilting his head like he often does. It makes his features softer, when his eyes are wider and his hair’s in his face.

 

“I don't know how to play.” He admits sheepishly, still smiling. That's not all, of course. Naruto knows this. Still, he laughs and props his head up with a loose fist.

 

“Oh, c’mon!” He chirps. “I can teach you!” Sasuke’s smile stays firmly in place, but he shakes his head. They lapse into comfortable silence. Something flies overhead and they tense, only to realize it's only a bird of some sort. Naruto chuckles quietly at their readiness, turning mirthful eyes back to Sasuke.

 

“Tell me what you were thinking, back there.” He asks after a while. “What went through your head?”

 

Sasuke stares at him in question. “What do you mean?”

 

“When you saw that convoy in front of us, what went through your head? You knew we could handle seven men if they came at us. I know you did, but you blew them sky high anyway. Why?”

 

Sasuke blinks, not sure where this line of questioning is coming from. Did Naruto think he did something wrong? Did he not agree with killing them?

 

“I wanted to protect all of you?” He says, not liking how his voice rises towards the end of it, making it more of a question than a statement. “They were going to call for backup. It was an easy choice.”

 

Naruto stares at him blankly, face betraying nothing. It's vaguely intimidating. “They weren't going to be faster than us. We could have subdued them before they got the chance.” He points out.

 

Sasuke resists the urge to stomp his foot at Naruto’s insistence. Why argue this? He feels like he turns into such a child when the other man is around.

 

“Probably. I wasn't going to take that chance. We have better things to do and we don't have time for anyone to recover from possible injuries while we're aiming for the Western Fortress. It was the quickest and safest way out. That's what I was thinking.” He pauses, unsure. “Was that...wrong?”

 

Naruto blinks for a moment, then shrugs like the tension that was building never existed in the first place.

 

“Just checking.” He grins slyly at Sasuke’s dry look before continuing. “It was a very Sasuke thing to do, is all. You've always been pretty good under pressure. Good at not losing your head. I wanted to make sure it was purposeful, since I thinking that I would have done the same.”

 

Naruto thinks he’s good under pressure? Ha.

 

“Okay.” He replies since he's not sure what to say.

 

Naruto presses closer to him, still grinning. Sasuke feels his breath catch at their sudden closeness. “Don't be like that. I'm not doubting you or interrogating you. It's just nice to see that we still think alike after so long, you know?” He's mumbling towards the end of it, cheeks taking on a bit of color at his own admission. Sasuke’s sure his own mirror the same.

 

Sasuke nods, staring down at his feet so he doesn't have to see how prettily Naruto’s eyes sparkle under porch light. At his silence, Naruto sighs heavily, leaning back to his prior position. Sasuke wishes to pull him back, but refrains.

 

The silence this time isn't so comfortable, and Sasuke blames himself as the cause of it. Why can't he just say nice things back when others say the same to him? He curses his creator; they took a perfectly good cyborg and just had to give it anxiety and social awkwardness.

 

Ah. Technically his creator would be his mother, wouldn't it? Since he found out how he truly came to be. He takes that back.

 

Naruto’s never been good with long stretches of silence, though, always talking enough for the both of them. “Can I ask you something?” He says quietly, pulling Sasuke from his thoughts.

 

“Of course.” He replies immediately.

 

Naruto purses his lips, obviously struggling with what he wants to say.

 

“Do you think it's weird that I'm so...so _okay_ with Sakura and Lee being together? I mean, it’s been years, but I just feel like, I don't know, maybe I should be more hurt about it. But I'm not.”

 

He hears the sounds of laughter from inside, faint and bell-like. He hopes no one decides to join them right now.

 

Sasuke blinks, not at all expecting that. He fumbles, but recovers quickly. He instinctively knows that Naruto isn't really open to talking about this, but he probably can't help himself. They always were the best keepers of each other's secrets. He's not going to let him down by saying something stupid.

 

“No, I don't.” Sasuke says, feeling his heart clinch when Naruto turns vurnerable eyes to him. “You've cared about her for a long time. You just want her to be happy. Lee too, since he's your friend. You're _you_ , Naruto. Despite everything, or because of it, you're going to support them because that's what you've always done.”

 

Naruto stares at him, way too open for Sasuke’s liking, and bites his lip before looking away.

 

“I don't think she was ever really in love with me, anyway. Not truly.” Sasuke wants to deny this, but he can't since he has no idea if it's true or not. “Not like I loved her. I was familiar, comfortable. A constant. Everybody expected that she'd give in eventually and I guess she did. I never expected it to be a forever thing. Then, after we lost Hanami, well, it was hard to look at each other for a while. That cinched it.”

 

Sasuke steps closer, ready to offer empty comfort, but Naruto stubbornly waves him off so he stays rooted to the spot. “I guess that's why I'm okay with it, since I knew she loved me as a friend more than anything. I didn't expect much so I wasn't all that disappointed.” He pauses, lost in thought for a moment.

 

“Did you know that we were born completely human? Or, almost anyway.” Naruto remarks softly, like it’s not still jarring to hear.

 

“What?” Because he still thought —

 

“When I cradled my daughter to me as she died, I realized that if she was augmented she could have been saved. Maybe. It's hard to say. But she wasn't registered so she was never modified. She died completely human.”

 

“Naruto—” Sasuke tries. He's ignored.

 

“It's fine. I'm not going to break down. I've done enough of that over the years, trust me. Let me explain.”

 

Sasuke wants to say something, to let him break down and cry of that's what he needs to do. It shouldn't stay bottled up or pushed aside. Sasuke wants to be his confidant, but he also understands that there are some things he may never be able to touch.

 

“We found out that we all have a period of time we can't recall. Around age five or six. It's then that we're outfitted with our enhancements. It seems we're born with the better vision and sturdier limbs and whatnot but the robotic parts are implanted. Do you remember the ache, after the fog? I do.”

 

He does. Fuck. He does. He woke up one day and felt heavy. Like he ate too much and it was churning inside him. He remembers that clearly, like most things due to his impeccable memory, but not that came before it.

 

“Yeah. Everyone makes that face when they realize. You remember that old comic book hero, Wolverine? He was human first, before they put the adamantium in him.” He snorts, even though Sasuke knows he isn't finding anything funny. “It’s like that. A mutant, but still human. We were human first. How fucked up is that?”

 

“Jesus Christ.” Sasuke mumbles, feeling a bit overwhelmed.

 

Naruto’s staring at him again, and he sighs heavily, trying to plaster a smile on his face but it's barely working.

 

“But enough of the heavy shit, you know? We're having a good night. I'm not going bum you out with all this.” He chirps with fake cheer.

 

“You don't have to do that, Naruto.” Sasuke says, protesting immediately. “You don't have to shut it off just because it's sad. You're allowed to talk about this if it’s hurting you. You can always talk about whatever you want with me. I promise I'll listen, no matter what.”

 

Naruto huffs, cheeks dusted red again like he's embarrassed. It was probably a little too open and honest for him, raw as he is right now. Sasuke vows to dial it back, for both of their sakes.

 

“Christ, why are you so—” He throws his hands up in what seems to be frustration, but his eyes are dancing. “You're making me look bad! Always so freaking... valiant and understanding and, GAH!”

 

Sasuke can't help himself: he laughs, silently glad that the heavy atmosphere broke under the weight of Naruto’s exasperation. He tries to smother it in his fist, but it isn't working.

 

Naruto’s stops his sputtering after a few mumbled half-curses, but the blush is still firmly in place. He watches Sasuke laugh into his hand, hair loose and floating as he shakes from it. Naruto’s lips parted and his eyes fill with...something. It only takes two determined strides for him to push close and press their lips together in a firm kiss.

 

Sasuke simply short circuits. Oh, how he _dreamed,_ so, so many times, but he never thought it'd ever happen. Naruto’s gripping his shirt, trying to coax him open, but Sasuke’s too shocked for it to work. He pulls back, hurt, but seeing the utter bewilderment in Sasuke’s gaze instead of rejection, it's quickly replaced by confused anger.

 

“Don't act like you didn't know.” Naruto says quietly, turning away.

 

He didn't.

 

Not a hint, not a whisper, because otherwise he would have wrapped him tight and never let go. He thinks he should feel like a fool for never noticing. For not understanding that Naruto’s brand of gentleness was not universal. Some similarity sure, with those cared about, but there was always something in the way they melded together—twisted and firm like interwoven branches born of the same tree—that caused their eyes to linger a moment too long and their bodies to gravitate no matter the distance.

 

He should feel like a fool, but he doesn’t, since Naruto can't possibly be aware of his own feelings then, if he thinks Sasuke incapable of speaking the words they swallowed for so long. If he thinks Sasuke doesn't want to bind him, tear him open, finally see that Red Giant beating in his chest once and for all and paint the universe with his colors.  

 

An ugly misunderstanding. One that wasting eons of time. Another mistake to curse himself for later, but not tonight.

 

“No,” he says, grabbing Naruto’s shoulder so he'll look at him. He bites down a huff when blue eyes refuse to meet is own. “I didn't.”

 

Naruto grunts but doesn't shake him off. “How? I wasn't subtle about it.”

 

He was. More than he thinks he was. Or Sasuke’s just a blind idiot. Both options are highly possible.

 

“I think you were,” He replies, and before Naruto can being to curse him—which he's clearly gearing up to do, if the fire in his eyes is any indication—Sasuke prattles on before he loses his nerve. “About as much as I was.”

 

Naruto stops short, biting down the rant Sasuke knew was coming. He stares, confused for a moment before understanding dawns in his eyes. He pushes into his space again, and Sasuke doesn't understand why he still looks so angry. Even more so than before, if he's honest.

 

“Don't lie; I don't need your pity.” His eyes are too pretty up close, so it takes Sasuke a moment to realize what he's said.

 

“Why would I?” How is he the one able to remain so calm? Maybe because he expected a fight, when this all came to light, but not for the reason Naruto’s giving one.

 

After so long, he's surprisingly bold, which shocks him and fills him with pride, all at once. “I'm in love with you. I've always been in love with you. It's just a fact of life. The sun rises in the East and sets in the West, the moon controls the tides, oh, and Sasuke’s in love with Naruto again today. Just like that.” He says matter-of-factly, even though it feels like he's bursting.

 

Naruto stares, like he's seeing him for the first time, blinking quickly while he processes this information. There's a flash of warm happiness that crosses his features, but they quickly screw up with more complicated emotions soon after.

 

“So you weren't going to tell me?” He asks roughly. Sasuke narrows his eyes and crosses his arms.

 

“You clearly didn't plan on telling me, either.” He fires back. Naruto doesn't deny that, so Sasuke continues, softer this time. His boldness has dried up, it seems. It didn't last long. “I didn't think anything would come of it.”

 

It wouldn't have, if circumstance hadn't thrown them together again. If he followed his orders like a good little soldier instead of insisting that this be flesh and not bones.

 

“Well,” Naruto says, holding his gaze steady and stepping forward again, “You were wrong.”

 

How glorious it is to be, sometimes.

 

“I guess I was.” He swallows thickly at their proximity, gauging Naruto’s intent. At least his anger seems to have dissipated. His friend must have forgotten that he's a fucking idiot that needs to have things spelled out for him, especially something as complicated as feelings.

 

—Friends? Is that what you are?

Is that what you want?

While you think of his mouth

Firmly against yours?

 

“I guess you were.” Naruto echoes, voice dropping lower. Sasuke tries to hold still but he thinks he's failing, hands desperate to bring him closer. “I guess I was, too.”

 

“Seems like it.”

 

Naruto’s mouth slides into a smirk, sultry, one that shouldn't be allowed. The wind picks up, brushing blond locks into his face and Sasuke’s quick to catch and pin them in place behind a blush-red ear. Naruto watches him, eyes scanning his face like he's remembering its pattern, and he _smiles_ , warm and whole and wonderful and _oh_ , there goes the last bit of his control out the window. Sasuke waves it off like a mother sending her child to school.

 

He's the one to bypass guard, this time, surging forward like a parched man in the desert.

 

All that he agonized over, kept close to his heart like a dragon hoarding its gold, only to end up here—on the run in a forgotten city, kissing his love like maybe it's the only he's ever wanted to do.

 

Naruto responds in kind, taking his face into his hands while Sasuke’s arms settle around his waist. It goes on for some time, soft yet fervent like they're simply trying to figure it out, until Naruto’s pulling away for air.

 

He rests his head on Sasuke’s shoulder, shaking ever so. Or, maybe Sasuke’s the one doing that, as he tries desperately not to vibrate out of his skin.

 

“It’d be kinda weird to cry right now wouldn't it?” Naruto says casually after a while, casual if not for the grip he has on Sasuke’s shirt or his ever present need to press closer. Sasuke can't help the laughter that bubbles out of him; airy and free like the noonday breeze. It's maybe the happiest he's heard himself.

 

“I feel like every time we hug, I start crying. Isn't that strange? I keep wanting to punch you, but I cry instead. Why do you think that is?”

 

“I don't think loving me changes how much I piss you off.” He offers, and Naruto chuckles into his shirt.

 

“Fair enough.” He says, before kissing him once more.

 

Every time it seems like it's going to die down they stare into each other's eyes and it starts all over again. Finally, when the pressure is too much and they run the risk of embarrassing themselves more than they already have, Sasuke delicately pulls away and stamps down a predatory part of himself that flares up when Naruto nearly pouts in disappointment.

 

He knows they should stop but he can’t help it; depraved and depressed for so long, he’s going to take what he can get before Naruto wizens up and changes his mind.

 

“So you're telling me,” He says, voice little more than a growl, “I could have done this years ago, and you'd have been okay with it?”

 

“Yep.” Naruto says, smiling brilliantly while his eyes darken.

 

“Ah, _fuck me_. Are you kidding?” He says disparagingly. Naruto only grins wider.

 

“I was hoping for the other way around but that works, too.”

 

“Ugh.” Sasuke groans, before swooping down to steal another fervent kiss. Naruto threads his hands through his hair and moans. Dangerous, Sasuke thinks, since they're out in the open and he wants nothing more than to make his love's cries louder and louder. It doesn't get that far, since they're caught. Not to say it doesn't get further than it should, with Naruto’s lips on his neck and Sasuke’s knee pressed between his legs.

 

Tenten pushes open the screen door, question formed on her lips about their whereabouts, stopping short as she sees the scene in front of her.

 

She’s drunk, as are the rest of the inhabitants of the house, but the flush that gave her is nothing in comparison to the one she has now.

 

“Oh!” She nearly shouts, causing them to pull away from each other sharply. “We were worried you guys were out here being all lame and gloomy but I guess you're celebrating too, eh?” Sasuke absolutely loathes the wiggle of her brows that accompanies it.

 

Before they can say anything — not in denial, since this is clearly exactly what it looks like — Tenten’s turning her head back inside and calling:

 

“Hey guys! They’re fine! They're just making out!”

 

Sasuke squawks, horrified, even more so when Kiba calls out a proud: “Fucking _finally!_ No more wading through all that sexual tension! Cheers to that!”

 

He hears agreeable cheers from inside and can't help the warm chuckle that escapes him. Naruto looks absolutely murderous for a moment, before giving in with fond eye roll, pulling Sasuke by the hand so they can join them.

 

“Let’s go give them a show, I guess.” He says with a grin, and Sasuke can’t help but entangle him again before he gets too far, much to Tenten’s endless amusement.

  **•••**

 

Naruto had taken to using the ground floor library as his quarters, just for some privacy and quiet. When the night has died down and they're ready for rest, Sasuke doesn't see a point to being subtle when he follows behind him. He never gets the chance anyway, since the others make a point of leering and whistling and being utterly obscene, so he accepts it all good-naturedly and is glad their union is met with such overwhelming support.

 

They lay facing each other in the dying candle light. Naruto strokes his hair, moving it away from his face.

 

“There's still so much I want to tell you.” He whispers. About his life in his absence, about how all this started, about his crushing loneliness that Sasuke can relate to all too well.

 

Naruto yawns and Sasuke understands that it won't happen tonight.

 

“Me too.” He whispers back. “But get some sleep. We have time.”

 

For once, he actually believes it.

 

Only if for the night.


	6. Ctrl + C

 

* * *

 

 **Six**.

 

 _Hindsight's a wonderful thing,_  
_When we're all experts who pretend._  
_Where's a good place to begin?_  
_Let's start with the truth,_  
_‘Cause it gets you in the end._

—Hangin’, Bastille

* * *

 

**A.**

 

There’s a fortress, high up in the west, full of secrets and guarded like the tower of God. In a way, it is, since the rumor goes that it’s the Promised Land. Everything they need, everything they’ve fought for, everything they’ve _died_ for, lies hidden within its walls. Too bad it’s nearly impossible for them to gain entry.

 

Shikamaru says as much, falling heavily into a rickety wooden chair, having poured over the blueprints and plans for days on end with little break. Finally, the break takes him, and he reluctantly admits that he has nothing.

 

“I can’t find a weak point,” He mutters dejectedly, scrubbing a weary hand over his face, pulling his drawn features into even more of a frown. “There’s no backdoor, no loading bay, no entry point that they haven’t accounted for. It’ll be hell enough getting closer than we are now, but getting in? I just can’t see it.”

 

Naruto mirrors his frown, staring irritably at the half-broken table like it’s the cause of all his problems. Kiba sighs through his nose and purses his lips while Lee raps his fingers across the wood in an agitated, steady beat. Gaara paces in a slow path that will no doubt wear out the cracked tiles with the intensity of his footfalls, and Sasuke scans the ceiling like it’s a map that will somehow lead him to a viable solution.

 

It’s just the six of them in the old red farm for now, the others busy with tasks that lead them elsewhere, and that’s the only reason Shikamaru comes close to admitting defeat. He’d never lose face if he knew it’d leave the confines of this room, never hint to the others that they’re maybe close to failing.

 

“There has to be _something,_ ” Gaara grunts, and for once Sasuke feels his anger is warranted. It can’t be so, that they’ve wasted their time and nothing will come of it. They can’t go on like this—maybe they could, but maybe they just don’t want to—since secure holdings are harder to come by the closer they get, and this many faces moving as one isn’t going to go unnoticed forever. Something has to give, before their bellies empty and the reaper comes knocking. It’s a sobering thought, to realize that they might be on the downswing long before they’ve reach the climax.

 

Lee crosses his arms and looks down at his lap. “We could always...contact the Reds? They may have some ideas.”

 

“Except we kinda made it clear last time that we aren’t on their leash.” Kiba fires back. “Think of something else.”

 

The Reds? Sasuke thinks, who the fuck is that?

 

He doesn’t realize that he’s said it aloud until everyone’s looking at him. He catches a flinch, still hating being center stage, but the question flew to open air and he’s expecting someone to answer it.

 

“Ah.” Naruto murmurs like he’s remembered something. “We never did tell you about them, huh?”

 

There’s a sharp edge in his eyes that’s too alert and condemning for those they speak of to be a casual acquaintance. Sasuke doesn’t know what to make of that, since he can’t imagine Naruto bowing to anyone, but he also can’t fathom turning down freely given aid, if that’s what it is.

 

“Never needed to,” Shikamaru interjects. “We fell out before Sasuke showed up and it was never an option to work for them again.”

 

He sends a pointed look to Lee, who raises his hands in surrender.

 

“I wasn’t saying we should work under them.” Lee bites back defensively. “I said we should contact them and find out if they know how to break into Ethelred. That’s all.”

 

“That’ll let them know where we are and what we’re doing,” Gaara says from the window. “What about that sounds like ‘cutting ties’ to you?”

 

“I’m lost.” Sasuke announces loudly. There are too many large personalities in the room, and he refuses to let his question be lost in the storm that’s brewing right in front of him. “Care to catch me up?”

 

He sees Naruto smirk almost as quickly as it’s gone. The other man had urged him to assert himself more often since he’s part of the team, and he’s trying, but it’s hard when everyone’s on a hair trigger and yelling over top of each other at the slightest of provocations.

 

Sasuke scratches the newly-healed ink on his right wrist, tracing the loops with his pinky. They match again, black marks to signify forever. He can't help but feel giddy about this new scar covering his old.

 

It’s Shikamaru who takes the responsibility, as he’s often to do. “It’s...when we first started out, we weren’t independent.” He says around a sigh. “We got orders from a group called the Red Dawn. They’ve been around of a long time and apparently manage some other cells as well, here and on other colonies. They provided us with everything we needed to carry out attacks and gave us targets to go after. Everything up until a few months ago was under their order.”

 

That’s interesting, to say the least. Sasuke’s reminded of just how much the humans didn’t know, since there was nothing about this ‘Red Dawn’ in the briefing that related to Naruto and his group. Come to think of it, he doesn't think he’s heard anything about them, ever. If they’re in charge of many groups and have such a presence in the colonies, how could such a thing go unnoticed?

 

“What happened?” He asks. Since from what he’s hearing, something had to go south to ruin such a partnership.

 

Naruto takes over, leaning forward and clasping his hands on the table in front of him. “We’re not exactly sure. Their orders started to make less and less sense. In the beginning, we moved slowly, not taking on too much. We’d take some risks but only when the reward was worth it, and we’d have time to plan everything out well. Towards the end, when we parted ways, they started instructing us to do things recklessly. We were out in the open too much, being too flashy. It almost seemed like they wanted to get us killed.”

 

“They got what they wanted, then.” Gaara says bitterly, “Since our last mission for them was the Valley Shipyard, and you know how well that turned out.”

 

He does.

 —That scene was set

To bring him here,

It’s why he’ll never share

  cups with Shino and Choji

Again.

 

He sees the old pain flare up in the faces around him, and he sighs heavily and looks at the floor.

 

“They know more than we ever could.” Lee says quietly.” I don’t trust them either, but they might know something. Shouldn’t we at least try?”

 

“Probably.” Kiba admits. “But should we really take that chance? I don’t think they were too happy with us saying we wouldn’t do their bidding anymore.”

 

“Trust me. They weren’t.” Naruto says flatly. Sasuke hates that look in his eyes, but it’s worth being explored later, when they’re alone. “It’s not an option.”

 

He sighs, running a hand through his hair. “We might have to... delay our timeline, until we can figure out our next move. We aren’t giving up, but we should probably lay low for a bit.”

 

Sasuke sees the others nod grimly, faces falling closer and closer to the floor, and he feels a heavy weight in his chest. He racks his brain, trying to find some avenue they haven’t traveled yet. He’d hate for the day to end on a sour note, hate even more for their prize to slip out of their fingers. He slips, let’s himself think more like the soldier he is, even though his time spent before he took to the wilderness feels like a past life.

 

What would his commander expect for him to do, in this situation? Hell, what would his _father_ do, when faced with near-impossible odds? Fugaku’s the slipperiest fucker he knows, so he just needs to think like him, right? He had to hear old tales of glory from his father’s hay day enough as a child. He memorized some of them, played them out in his head, revered the man up until the point that he stopped thinking of him as a man at all. His father was a chameleon, blended in with—

 

It clicks.

 

“Wait,” Sasuke says, before his thoughts have even congealed into something intelligible. “I have an idea.”

 

“What is it?” Kiba asks, raising both eyebrows since he wasn’t blessed with the gift of raising one.

 

“Let me see your laptop for a minute, Shikamaru.” He says, already rising to use it. Shikamaru follows him up, questioning, but Sasuke’s rather keen on showing them instead of explaining what he’s thinking.

 

Their connection is solid, nearly foolproof. Shikamaru saw to that. He’s honestly too smart for his own good, to make their web access nearly untraceable. Still, the government’s tech is stronger than theirs, so he has no idea what they can see from their end. Sasuke doesn’t want to risk being possibly traced, so he’ll keep this brief. He only needs to confirm what he’s thinking, and if he’s right, he’s got the perfect plan for getting what they need.

 

They all crowd around him as Sasuke types away.

 

“You’re kinda scaring me, dude.” Kiba says, unsure, after they stare in silence for a few moments.

 

“Just give me a second.” He reassures.

 

He finds what he’s looking for in the military database. He didn’t even have to hack it, instead going straight for the backdoor that he knew was there. It’s less suspicious if he has the password, right? Probably not, but it’s one of the perks he got for being “highly favored.” Some minor victories, afforded to him for being the good little dog he was. He doesn’t have time to be bitter over it, since such sins bore beneficial fruit. He simply scrolls through until he finds his name and breathes a sigh of relief at the results.

 

“There,” He points at the screen, turning to look at the faces behind him as everyone leans in closer over his shoulder to see. “Is our way in.”

 

It was a gamble, but he figured that after he disappeared, they would label him dead or M.I.A—or, that’s what a normal soldier would get, but Sasuke’s not a normal soldier.

 

So instead, a bright green ACTIVE banner accompanies his frowning digital portrait.

 

Fortunately for them, his company learned that they were to be stationed at the god-like fortress before they got the information about the mole. Ethelred was going to be a meeting point of some important political figures from all the colonies near the end of the year, completely unrelated to the mission of finding the rebels.  They were to serve as security after their hunt, since no one expected the mission to take this long.

 

How wrong they were.

 

Still, it wouldn’t be strange for Sasuke to appear there, just….following orders.

 

“I don’t understand,” says Lee, faced twisted in confusion. “You’ve been gone for months; how do they still consider you active?”

 

Sasuke sees Gaara’s eyes fill with something quite like suspicion—then a stranger, haunted look that he couldn’t possibly decipher—but Sasuke knew this would happen so he can easily explain.

 

“Simple. They don’t want my father to know that I’ve possibly been killed.”

 

Four out of five eyes fill with comprehension, but Gaara still looks confused. “You wouldn’t know this Gaara, but my father’s a powerful man. He gives a lot of money to the Capitol police force simply because I worked there. He’s got plenty of political clout as well, because of what he does, so it wouldn’t be good for his son to die on a mission he didn’t personally clear himself, would it?” He can’t help the self-deprecating smile that comes with it, hating that he still has to rely on daddy to tell him what he can and can’t do.

 

He wonders how much shit his father gave Danzo when he realized that Sasuke was gone without permission. He would have given anything to see it.

 

“Your father didn’t know you were coming here?” Naruto questions. Sasuke can see that he’s still infinitely sour towards the man, if the twist of his lips is anything to go by. Sasuke bites down a smile since this isn’t the time.

 

“Nope. It was supposed to be covert. We didn’t tell anyone we were going, which is why you guys could pick up on the tracker I had and why it still placed me on earth when I clearly wasn’t.” He pauses, turning back to the screen. “So they’re probably not going to change my status until the mission is over, I guess. What they tell him afterward isn’t my business and I don’t care.”

 

His mother doesn't deserve that, though, to mourn a second son who's lost in the sky. He chooses not to dwell on it.

 

“All I know is: If I’m still active in the database, I still have clearance. And If I still have clearance—”

 

He trails off, letting them come to their own conclusions.

 

“—Then we have a way in!” Kiba finishes excitedly. He squishes Sasuke’s cheeks together, grinning. “Ah, you beautiful fucker, you!”

 

Lee smiles at him, clapping his hand on his shoulder companionably while Shikamaru clenches his fist in renewed determination. Sasuke can help the puff of pride that fills his chest at their excitement.

 

Even Gaara nods at him agreeably, tipping his head in acknowledgement. There’s still question in his eyes, so Sasuke looks at him imploringly so he’ll voice it.

 

“Does that mean you’ll have to go in alone?” He asks. The others pause at this, sobering, looking a Sasuke for his answer.

 

“Initially. Once I gain access, I’ll find the path of least resistance and let you all in. Does that work for you?” He knows what the other man is thinking, that Sasuke will use this opportunity to easily betray them.

 

He can see why thoughts would lean towards that, seeing as there would be another easier, more logical explanation for Sasuke’s active military status. That he’s a mole. Or a double agent. If Gaara still thinks that of him, that’s fine. He’s not here to win points with him, anyway. If the others think that of him, well, that’s a bit of a problem.

 

“Of course.” Lee pipes up, smiling at him reassuringly. Sasuke lets out a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding. “I trust you, Sasuke. That’s a better plan than just rushing in, anyway.”

 

“That’s for sure.” Shikamaru agrees. “We can tweak this. Maybe we can get you to the control room and you can shut off some of the perimeter defenses so we get in and out easier. I can probably adjust your clearance levels too, given some time. This will work.” He says confidently.

 

Naruto stands to the side, arms crossed, letting them all pour over plans once more. Sasuke can tell from the stiffness of his body that he’s hesitant, but hopeful. Sasuke let’s himself fade from the circle, opts out of the chorus of overlapping voices to come stand near him.

 

He’s still silent, watching the others, and Sasuke looks at him sidelong from the corner of his eyes.

 

“You’re not a fan of the idea.” He asks quietly. The absence of Naruto’s voice in the swell of excitement hadn’t gone unnoticed by him.

 

“It’s dangerous.” Naruto stays, turning to meet his eyes. “If there’s anyone who knows you there they’ll know something’s off. This could easily get you killed with the slightest misstep.”

 

“You’re right.” He admits. He’d thought of that, too. “We can check the schedules again, see if there’s anyone there who’d be able to identify me or question my whereabouts. It’s not like we’re going tomorrow, Naruto; we have time to iron this all out.”

 

The blond man huffs, frustrated, clearly biting down something he truly wants to say. Sasuke’s pretty sure he knows what it is, and bites down a pleased smile at Naruto’s concern for his safety. Instead, Naruto choosing to speak on something else, eyes taking on a sharp look that Sasuke really doesn’t like.

 

“And what of your friends?” Naruto asks tonelessly, almost making him flinch. “The ones you came with? If you popped back up on their radar, won’t they know something is wrong? Won’t they expect you to align with them again?”

 

Sasuke freezes. He’d forgotten about Juugo and the others, so caught up in the whirlwind of their planning. Forgotten that he didn’t know their fates, and if they do live, how will he explain his whereabouts to them for the past few months?

 

“So they’re alive?” He questions, chest filling with traitorous hope.

 

—That’s what he is,

Isn’t he? Always has been.

A traitor to both sides.

  

“Also, I wouldn’t call them my friends.” he follows up with. Naruto raises an eyebrow at him.

 

“Oh really?” He questions. “That’s interesting. Your face says otherwise.” His eyes fill with something dark and dangerous, and Sasuke tries not to look away from their intense scrutiny.  He’s reminded of what he said to Naruto at their reunion.

 

_You still consider us friends?_

 

Like it was ever in question. How much of a lie that turned out to be, so he understands Naruto’s skepticism. Sasuke has the awful habit of downplaying what people mean to him to protect himself and he’s sure that Naruto’s picked up on it.

 

So he amends, as not to give Naruto reason to doubt him. “Fine. Juugo might be my friend, Karin as well, but Suigetsu isn’t someone I’d go for beers with, alright?   We worked together and I worried about them and yes, I didn’t want them to die. Is that enough for you?” He doesn’t like that his voice dips from defensive to angry at the drop of a hat.

 

He's still lying.

 

He's not sure why.

 

“It’s plenty.” Naruto says, sneering. This feels like a fight. Why are they fighting? “I won’t be comfortable with this until I know they’re out of the way.”

 

He can’t mean—

 

”Wipe that stupid look off your face, I don’t mean kill them. I just don’t want them anywhere near this. I can’t have your attention set in two different directions, Sasuke. You need to worry about our safety, not theirs.”

 

“ _Of course_ I want you safe!” He shoots back roughly, offended at the thought that he wasn't. “And there won’t be “two directions” if I can convince them to—” He tries.

 

“No.” He says resolutely, narrowing his eyes.” We’re not recruiting them. That’s too many unknowns and we won’t have time to test their loyalty. We don’t know what their motives are.”

 

“Freedom, just like us.” Sasuke retorts, feeling frustration building. It’s hurtful that Naruto’s looking at him with mistrust, like Sasuke would choose his old team over this one. Hurtful, but understandable. Sasuke switched sides the first time easily enough, and no amount of old bonds can change that fact. Still, he has to understand that it was different, right? That he’d follow Naruto to the ends of the earth if he had to, while he would hesitate to follow Suigetsu to the end of the block. He wouldn’t risk the lives of those he loves to protect those he tolerates, even if it does seem like he enjoys playing hero.

 

 “Whatever. I’ll find them and convince them to stay away.” He says when Naruto doesn’t respond. He’s angry, but its fine since Sasuke is, too. “Does that work for you, _boss_?” He throws in pettily, knowing that it would wound Naruto, somehow. Naruto narrows his eyes further and sucks his teeth, turning away from him.

 

“Of course it does, _soldier_.” He retorts, making Sasuke clench his fist. “I expect a report on my desk about how this little playdate goes, is that clear?”

 

“Crystal.” He grunts before Naruto’s nearly stomping out of the room. Sasuke watches him go, at once realizing that he hadn’t heard everyone’s idle chatter for a while. He turns, only to realize that the others are watching him carefully, like they’re looking out for landmines. _Great_ , of course they heard the whole thing, being a few steps away.

 

Gaara quietly goes after Naruto, giving Sasuke a look as he leaves that almost looks like understanding, or maybe its pity, before he disappears into the hall.

 

“You guys still argue like cats and dogs.” Kiba says after a moment. “I thought all the _banging_ would cut down on that, to be honest.” Lee elbows him in the chest at that, giving him a look of warning. Kiba shrugs and sits down heavily in one of the chairs, grinning.

 

Shikamaru sighs, rolling his eyes. He beckons Sasuke over to the computer, still watching him like he’s unsure of what he’s going to do. Sasuke huffs and stomps over, himself, feeling embarrassed and put out.

 

“Let’s find these friends of yours, alright?” he says. Sasuke doesn’t bother correcting him. “Who knows, you might learn something valuable from them while you’re there.”

 

Sasuke doesn’t respond, causing Shikamaru to sigh again, typing away at his terminal.

 

Shikamaru’s frowning, eyes scanning the information as it tumbles across his screen. Sasuke mirrors his frown, staring irritably at the half-broken table like it’s the cause of all his problems. Kiba sighs through his nose and purses his lips while Lee raps his fingers across the wood in an agitated, steady beat.

 

“He trusts you, you know.” Lee says softly after a time, while there was no noise except the constant ticking of the clock on the wall and the _tap, tap, tap_ of hurried keystrokes.

 

 Sasuke knows that, he does, but the insinuation that he’d be lying to them all this time still stings.

 

“He’s always afraid of losing people. He doesn’t like that there’s parts of you that he doesn’t know.”

 

He doesn’t know how to respond to that, so he doesn’t. He’s sure Lee wasn’t expecting one anyway.

* * *

 

 

**B.**

 

Sasuke’s cradles his head in his hands, stomach lurching like he’s going to throw up. He hasn’t moved but he feels like he can’t catch his breath.  His eyes are blurry and his mind is reeling, doubting everything he’s known up until this point. Naruto’s on his knees in front of him, face grey like a storm, pulling his hands away from his face so their eyes can meet.

 

“Sasuke,” He says urgently, nails pressing tiny half-moons into his wrists.  “Sasuke, look at me!”

 

He can’t. Fuck, he can’t. What if he’s—could he be?—what if—

 

—He should explain, shouldn’t he?

...

 

Afterward, Shikamaru pins down where Juugo and the others would be. Separated from the humans it seems, left on some eastern outpost not too far from the farmhouse base. Fortunate maybe, that Sasuke won't have to travel far.

 

Or not, since he's on the outs with Naruto.

 

Again.

 

Once he hears that they're close—closer than he’d like—Naruto’s face takes on a complicated expression that almost seems permanent. He frowns for the rest of the day, tightness pulling his handsome face so oddly that it makes him seem older than he is. The others, once they return, give him a wide berth and Sasuke’s inclined to do the same.

 

Naruto takes his lunch in his—their?—room, alone. He doesn't expressly state that no one should attempt to follow, but his body language reads that loud enough.

 

Sasuke’s sitting outside with a small group—Sai, Ino, and Sakura— in the makeshift garden that Kimimaro tends to, as they gather for a late lunch. It gives him something to do during the day, when he's too lost to the nuance of everyone else's conversations. They all leave him to it, mostly, since he's surprisingly good at it. Sasuke wonders endlessly if every Two has some secret skill that the world isn't aware of.

 

They vaguely hear something crash from inside, followed by Naruto’s subdued yelling.

 Ino immediately pinpoints the cause of his foul mood with startling accuracy.

 

“What did you do?” She asks Sasuke when they settle in.

 

“What makes you think I had anything to do with it?” He asks around a vicious bite of a bread roll. Temari’s made them, and despite her rough exterior she's a stellar baker. He'll have to remember to compliment her later.

 

“Well,” Sai says, spreading out a liberate line of butter across his slice of toast, “Naruto has two types of anger. There's angry-at-the-world and its injustices anger, and then there's Sasuke-anger. Since he's not making an impassioned speech, I'm going to guess this is Sasuke brand anger.”

 

Sakura nods sagely beside him, and Sasuke wonders how he gets himself into these situations.

 

“I wasn't going to put it exactly like that, but that's pretty much how I figure it out, too.” Ino says, shrugging.

 

“I’m not sure what I did.” He admits. No, that’s not right. He amends. “I think he thinks I care about what happens to my old team more than I care about all of you.”

 

That's what he gathered from it, at least. He could be acting like an idiot, as per usual, but once he thought over it a bit that's the conclusion he came to. From Naruto’s questioning about if he thought of them as friends, at his immediate denouncement of Sasuke’s suggestion to get them to join their ranks, he must not believe that Sasuke’s truly able to let go and move forward.

 

He doesn't know why he's surprised; ten years’ worth of estrangement can't be smoothed over with a few months in close quarters and heated words panted out in the dead of night. Lee’s earlier words rang true for Sasuke, too. He was infinitely sore about missing out on large parts of Naruto’s life, hating when the others made references to moments he wasn't around for.

 

It's hypocritical of him, he realizes. Naruto spent their nights telling him just about everything he could think of, painting beautiful pictures of an otherwise difficult life. Sasuke shared as well, bits and pieces of his adventures in his absence, but thinking on it now he never once mentioned Karin, Suigetsu, or Juugo. He wouldn't call them large parts of his life, but they were there.

 

It must have been a surprise for Naruto to hear that there were other people he wanted to protect, nearby at that, when before he prattled on and on about his solitude and the nameless faces that populated his universe. Shit, Naruto must think him a liar or worse—what if, in Naruto’s absence, he were to speak of him in the same way? Just a passing fancy who he couldn't care less about? He would never.

 

Never, never, _never_.

 

But how could he possibly know what? Sasuke’s track record isn't the best, after all. He already treated Naruto like nothing once before, which lead to their unwilling distance. He pretended for years that his brother’s departure wasn't a big deal, that it didn't tear open a hole that never has hope of being _filled_ —

 

 —No, let's not get into _that._

Too raw, still.

He never was one

To scab.

Shit, he fucked up, didn't he?

 

“Well, do you?” Sakura asks bluntly. Sasuke blinks at her, mouth twisting with some rude response, but he refrains. It’s a valid question— if the conclusions he's drawn truly form a picture— so he'll treat it as such.

 

“I don't. I'm where I want to be, and I'll do anything I must to make sure you all are safe. Just because I don't wish them dead doesn't mean I'm going to run off with them the minute I get the chance.” He says as clearly as he can.

 

It's different for Naruto and the others. To them, Hunters are evil, untrustworthy and dangerous. Yes, they're all of that, but Karin’s a little spacey, sometimes Juugo’s wistful for things that don’t exist, and Suigetsu's readings are marred with more color than they should ever have. He can’t treat them like mindless soldiers because they are more than that.

 

He should have treated them better while he had the chance, but Sasuke was always distracted, mind too lost to thoughts of spending moments like these with the people he's with now. He's not distracted anymore, firmly where he should be, but that doesn't mean he still can't wish that some things were different.

 

“See?” Sakura says, nodding with a smile. “If you put it like that it makes perfect sense. So say that to Naruto instead of whatever emotionally constipated thing you said before, and it'll be fine.” Rude.

 

“You both need to be much more patient with each other,” Ino surmises. “You end up with your feelings hurt because the two of you are way more sensitive than you let on.” Fair.

 

“Chuckles probably hasn't found where he's most _sensitive_ yet,” Sai cracks, “It’s why he's still so crabby.” Uncalled for.

 

He _really_ doesn't care for that nickname.

 

“Thank you, this has been really helpful. I appreciate it.” He goes to rise with a forceful eye roll but Sakura yanks him back down, smiling.

 

“Oh, sit, you big baby.” She says. He dutifully sits. “Pass me the butter.”

 

Her rolls are already drowned in them, so he doesn't relent. “I think you have enough.” He says, eyeing her growing belly with a pointed look.

 

“Come off it. I can still have butter!”

 

“No one said you couldn't, love.” Ino replies, saving Sasuke from her wrath. “But he's right; that bread is 90% butter now so you might as well eat out of the tub if you keep on like this.”

 

Sakura scoffs, indignant, but she has no reply since she's right. Sasuke isn't stupid, though, so he puts it out of reach right as she's going for it. The look she gives him could fell armies, but all he can do is laugh.

 ...

 

Even with his newfound clarity, he tries to exile himself to the living area that night. It's lonely, since the others occupy the upstairs rooms, but Naruto didn't seem to be in the mood to talk even after the sun went down, so he'll deal with the draft and the phantom creaks.

 

It doesn't last long.

 

The only thing that offends Naruto more than talking to him while he's angry is actively avoiding it. So Sasuke gets to rest on his lumpy bedroll for less than ten minutes before Naruto’s looming over him like a specter in the darkness.

 

His arms are folded and his mouth is set, and when Sasuke pretends not to see him and rolls over to face the wall, a well-placed foot finds its way to his midsection in the form of a swift kick.

 

“Ow.” He grunts, even though it barely hurt. Naruto didn't put any strength behind it. He must not be so angry anymore, then.

 

“Come to bed.” Naruto mutters, turning swiftly and retreating before Sasuke has time to respond.

 

He pads quietly inside _their_ room, basking in its warmth and praising the prospect of the heavy blanket that covers the old bed. He gently climbs into it, careful not to touch Naruto whose back is facing him. Sasuke lays on his back and stares at the ceiling, unsure what to say.

 

It's Naruto who speaks first, anyway, like he knew he would.

 

“Sakura told me what you said.” He mutters. Of course she did.

 

“Okay.”

 

“You could have said that to me yourself, instead of getting angry when I asked you what they meant to you.”

 

“You're right. I could have explained myself better.” He admits. But Naruto’s not completely blameless. He rarely is in their spats, egging Sasuke on since that's what he knows how to do best. “But you got angry first, before I could speak my piece.”

 

Naruto tuts, but he doesn't go to deny it. “I did. I was mad you felt the need to hide it from me that you cared. I wasn't going to make you choose, because you already did.”

 

“I did.” he agrees, happy that Naruto’s being honest with him without them raising their voices. It smells like progress. “And I'll always choose you. Over and over. I just...I don't know. It feels wrong to abandon them with no explanation since we’ve had each other's back plenty before. I feel like I owe it to them.”

 

They could have done this hours ago, since the words flow out as easy as the sunrise. He swears their stubbornness is going to be the death of them, one day.

 

“Okay. That's understandable.” Naruto says after a moment, still not looking at him. “I trust you.” He follows with softly.

 

Sasuke’s breath catches and he scoots closer. He knows it, he does, but it's always nice to hear. He wraps his arm around Naruto’s waist and presses a kiss underneath his ear, smiling secretly at his pleased shiver.

 

“Thank you.”

 

He litters more and more gentle kisses, begging forgiveness with his tongue, until Naruto gets frustrated and pins him down on his back, interlocking their hands. Their matching marks press together at the wrist.

 

“You drive me crazy.” Naruto admits, blonde locks brushing against Sasuke’s face in a way that makes him sigh. Sasuke chuckles, lurching up to press a kiss against his cheek.

 

“I know. I'm trying to change that.” He's trying to be someone worth Naruto's attention and love instead of the shuttered, complicated mess that he is.

 

Naruto looks at him warmly, tilting his head to the side and flashing him a wild grin.

 

“No,” He says, grinding down on Sasuke’s lower half with glorious friction. He bites his lip at Sasuke’s hungry look. “Don't.”

 

They don't talk much, after that.

 ...

 

When the planned day comes, he gets an escort.

 

“For protection,” Naruto says, but old habits die hard and Naruto’s too curious for his own good. That adds Gaara, since he refuses to let the two of them be alone together — which reminds Sasuke of the other man’s youth, since he'd probably kill Sasuke if he knew what was being done to his precious leader when they were truly left alone. Still, he won't give Sasuke the chance to leave Naruto bloody in ditch somewhere, so they're saddled with him.

 

Temari comes as well. Sasuke’s seen her in action, knows she's a beast with virtually any weapon. Calm, cool, collected. If anything were to go wrong, they could count on her to get them out of it. He thinks she must come to keep peace, since she's never shown much interest in Sasuke or his going-ons before, but he welcomes her company.

 

He has to protest at more additions, since everyone seems keen on making this a large group outing. They don't need that, since Sasuke’s not sure what he's even going to do once he meets up with the others. Naruto told him they needed to be out of the way, but can he really convince them of that? To stay away from the action? It would be a direct violation of their orders, not to mention that he doubts Suigetsu will let him walk away without explaining the entire _why_ of it. There will have to be more than that, since the white haired man is stubborn and won't believe Sasuke if he says it's only for them not to get caught in the crossfire.

 

Even if that's the truth.

 

Or, part of it, since he doesn't want them to possibly sabotage this mission. He remembers Suigetsu's desire to kill rebels, Karin’s hope for action, and Juugo’s wish to make it home. He can't tell them that if they get in his way, he'll be forced to kill them.

 

Even if that’s the truth.

 

So they set off, finding their mark in less than two days’ time, and Sasuke doesn't think it could get any more awkward than this. Naruto leads, as he's often to do, which means that Gaara’s right behind on his heels and ready to bite at Sasuke’s if he gets too close. He's forced to hang back, defeated, walking in time with Temari who might as well be a walking statue.

 

He can barely get two words out of her, since she chooses instead to keep a keen eye on their surroundings, hand poised on her weapon like there's a boogeyman in the bushes.

 

He wants to ask why she wanted to come along but she beats him to the punch.

 

“I came to confirm something,” she says, giving him a long look that makes him shift uncomfortably. “I'm probably right, but I hope that I'm not.”

 

At that vague and unsettling declaration, she turns away, thoroughly ignoring him while he stares after her. Naruto really collected a bunch of strange folk, Sasuke thinks, but he doesn't have that much room to talk.

 

The outpost is carved into a mountainside, built of stone and wood in the style of old ruins. The path leading to it is weathered and half-covered with overgrowth and rubble. Understandable, since there's no settlement for miles. Sasuke doesn't understand why they would have stuck his company up here in the quiet outskirts.

 

He can ask them, once he finds them here. Because of the location there aren't many other faces out and about, just under twenty to hold down the fort. Not too many to worry about and they haven't come here for a fight. They watch the holdings from a well-covered hill, scoping out the place for what feels like hours.

 

“See anything?” Naruto asks, posted next to Sasuke as he watches bored guards roam the battlements through his looking glass. It's colder up here, so the humans are weighed down with heavy coats and fuzzy hats, shivering their asses off.

 

They're easy to distinguish from the Synths that noticeably wear less—light coats and gloves to handle their freezing weapons. It's easy to pick out who’s who because of this. He spots only five out of the twenty dressed lightly, not counting the Synths he’s looking for at the moment. That seems like a low number all things considered, but there could be more inside.

 

“Not yet.” He feels agitated, almost stupid for coming here. It's pointless; he doesn't truly need to explain himself to anyone, even though it feels like the right thing to do. He's putting all of them in danger just to ease his conscience. Maybe he needs to, since it's very likely that he could die at any point, and he doesn't want to leave this world with any more regrets than he has now.

 

He feels responsible for Suigetsu's lost arm, for Karin’s injury, for leaving Juugo behind when the other man would have never done the same. It's kept him up the past few days, thinking, and no matter how much he tries to shake the feelings of guilt they refuse to go.

 

So, he'll own up to—ah, there!

 

He spots one of them near the entrance. It's Suigetsu, holding a gun almost as large as he is, sneering at the sky like he sees his worst enemy up there. Sasuke isn't ashamed to say he breathes a sigh of relief. For a while he thought he'd surely perished, dying in the dirt and the dust with a curse on his lips. But he's here, sans his right arm.

 

A shiny, mechanical arm hangs in its place. Stiff, gunmetal fingers pressed above the trigger of his weapon, and Sasuke stares at them longer than he should.

 

Better for a replacement than of absence, right?

 

That sentiment rings a little too true moments later when another figure joins him, emerging from inside the hold.

 

“Sasuke?” Naruto questions, voice colored with notes of concern. His grip has become too tight around his looking glass, threatening to crush it as it _creaks_ in protest. The breath punches out of him and he's sure his eyes bulge out of their sockets, too shocked to process what he's seeing.

 

It's Gaara that asks: “What is it?” In a hurried rush like maybe he's concerned too at Sasuke’s sudden stiffness. He takes the looking glass out of his suddenly limp hands. It's all that tethers him to the spot, since the moment it's gone he loses his footing and stumbles back on weak knees.

 

Gaara’s intake of breath is just as startling, harsh as it scraps against his throat. He swallows, letting the glass lower to his middle. He turns, sharing a look with Temari before they both turn to stare at him.

 

“Fuck.” She whispers gruffly, but Sasuke can't handle that, can’t question her on what she knows just yet.

 

She came to confirm something, didn't she? And she knew she was right? How did she know?

 

Sasuke’s cradles his head in his hands, stomach lurching like he’s going to throw up. He hasn’t moved but he feels like he can’t catch his breath.  His eyes are blurry and his mind is reeling, doubting everything he’s known up until this point. Naruto’s on his knees in front of him, face grey like a storm, pulling his hands away from his face so their eyes can meet.

 

“Sasuke,” He says urgently, nails pressing tiny half-moons into his wrists.  “Sasuke, look at me!”

 

He can’t. Fuck, he can’t. What if he’s—could he be?—what if—

 

“How is that possible?” Naruto demands fervently, head whipping around to stare at the other two. “You said they wouldn't have the tech to—”

 

“We were wrong.” Gaara says, quieter than Sasuke’s ever heard him. Subdued. Through the haze Sasuke sees that he's lost some of his color, tinted instead with quiet horror. “Sorry.”

 

Sasuke can't be sure who he is apologizing to. It doesn't matter. It doesn't. Sasuke’s too worried about painting his shoes with the breakfast he had this morning.

 

Ah, what a mess.

 

—It’s as you said:

Better for a replacement,

Than absence,

**_Right?_ **

 

Standing near the entrance, shivering slightly in the cold northern air, is a curious little soldier. Black hair, tied back with a frayed strip of yarn. Black eyes, hidden under angled lids. Pale and serious features, schooled perfectly through years of repression to have no expression at all.

 

There, near the entrance, is Sasuke.

 

* * *

 

**C.**

 

He's not sure how they get back, but they do. Sasuke couldn't go on, world rocked as it was, so they bowed out and retreated. Naruto may have carried him, since he's fairly sure his legs wouldn't allow him to stand again, let alone cover the distance back to the base. For two days he's lost, unsure of where he is or where he's going, and the minute they stumble back up the stairs he quarantines himself, biting his lips raw and nearly pulling out his hair.

 

On the third day, the first after their return, the haze clears enough for him to sit up in bed, ever-present headache fading into a dull throb. It's quiet. Too quiet. He hears no one outside the door like usual, catching no the whispers of their idle chatter. It's jarring, but he can tell the mood of the house is off, wrong.

 

Because of him.

 

He looks at himself in the mirror.  It’s the one thing in this house that has remained intact, despite the years in disrepair.  It's faring better than him, then. He looks like hell—eyes sunken and red, mouth cracked and blistered. So bad he doesn’t want to be seen like this, but his stomach cries in protest so he pulls himself together and emerges from his cave.

 

He pads out into the kitchen quietly. It’s still eerily silent. There's too many people here for no one to be milling about downstairs in the middle of the afternoon. Something is wrong.

 

He knows exactly what.

 

He had fever dreams, worked himself into such a state that he made himself sick. He dreamed, mind combing back over every thought, every memory to see where they all melded together. _If_ they melded together. Or they did just appear in his brain like they were carefully and meticulously placed there? Does he remember the emotions that accompanied his memories? Or do they feel as if they belong to...someone else?

 

Is he also a clone?

 

Is the original Sasuke still roaming the Earth, getting off of his shift with an aching neck, going to join his mother for dinner? Does he know of the Sasuke up here?

 

If he is a clone, is he even the first? How many have there been?

 

Fuck. _Fuck_.

 

And fuck again.

 

He grabs just about anything he can find, gorging himself since he feels absolutely ravenous. A bad idea, because he hasn't eaten much in many hours and the food lurches in his stomach uncomfortably.

 

There's a creak behind him, followed by some low, hurried whispers that set him on edge. It's coming from the direction of the living room, so that's probably his best bet to finding out where everyone is.

 

He slinks slowly out of the kitchen, pressing close to the wall, feeling surprisingly threatened. He doesn't know why. Or, he does, but he doesn't want to voice it while his thoughts are in shambles. He's distrustful of the shadows in the corners, of the spider on the wall, and he wants desperately not to succumb to his fear before he even knows if it's true yet.

 

Everyone is gathered the living room, silent like the dead. Stiff, unnerved, uncomfortable. Just a few names for the complicated expressions that are splashed across their faces.  

 

Sasuke presses down on a loose floorboard too hard, cause it to groan. Too many pairs of eyes swing towards him in slight surprise. Shit. He wants to run. Hide. He's never been good at being watched and he feels like he just might burst under the weight of their stares.

 

Naruto stares at him with an unreadable expression. It's foreign, full of things Sasuke doesn't want to see on his beautiful face.

 

Sakura makes a noise of alarm, rising immediately. “Oh, honey, you're up!” She exclaims, making her way to him. She freezes, hand still outstretched, when he takes an unconscious step back. She looks hurt but quickly covers it with a smile.

 

“Do you want something to eat?” She asks.

 

He stares at her like maybe he doesn't recognize her face. His tongue is too heavy to move, so he doesn't respond in enough time to keep her face from falling once more.

Everyone looks uncomfortable, uneasy, like he's a cornered animal who will bite at the tiniest of provocations. He feels like just that, but he hates the way they're looking at him, wants to scrub it off their faces with the edge of his palm.

 

It's okay.

 

He knows how to fix this.

 

“Kill me.” He says simply. The noise that punches out of Sakura almost sounds painful, and her face pales as her jaw drops.

 

“Sasuke—” She starts, mortified, but he's not done.

 

“Chuckles —” Sai says at the same time, eyes wide like saucers. Sasuke can say one thing about today: he managed to break even the hardest of stone faces, since Sai looks at him with undisguised worry and even Gaara colors with shadows of surprise at his declaration.

 

“Or, lock me up, or something. They could have implanted something in me, using it to gather information on all of you. They could be looking through my eyes _right now_ so one of you should just—”

 

Is he making sense? Are there words coming out of his mouth? Is he still dreaming? Of course he is, to think he could have ever fit in here. That he could have somewhere he belonged. He was a fool to think it was that easy. He was dreaming, and now this is the cold reality.

 

Danzo said it once, that the Capitol would follow them wherever they went so they needed to act accordingly. He was worried about that—that his torture and his training and his trampling down of his own emotions to be perfect, to be worthy, to be _useful—_ would ruin his chance of ever living normally, without guilt or regret or self-loathing. He was right to be worried.

 

Because he was right.

 

He’s vaguely aware that he's still talking, not at all deterred by his wandering mind until someone grips at his shoulders, anchoring him and cutting his raving short.

 

It's Shikamaru, looking more worried than he's ever seen him. The other man scans his face and tries to pull him out from the void.

 

“Sasuke,” he says gently. “Shut the fuck up.”

 

He does.

 

Once he stops ranting, the urge to cry bubbles up inside him in the ugliest way.

 

“You're not a goddamn clone.” Kiba says angrily from behind. “So we're not going to kill you. Jesus Christ.”

 

They can't possibly know that. Didn't they say it before? There's no way to prove that he’s not—

 

“I know this is a shock, babe, but you need to calm down. It's going to be okay.” Ino says soothingly.  

 

It's not, he’s—

 

“But—” he tries, but he's cut off again. This time, it's Kankuro.

 

They don't speak much. He's much like Temari, choosing to keep to himself. He didn't seem to hold a grudge like Gaara does over his prior injury, but he showed no interest in spending time together outside of a mission. It's rare for him to speak up in the group setting, when everyone is jovially shouting over top of each other. So when he speaks it commands the attention of the room.

 

“You aren't a clone. There are ways to tell.” He says firmly. Heads swivel, turning to look to his place on one of the lounge chairs. His fist props his face up casually, but there's a grim stiffness that flows out of him that can't be ignored.

 

“How?” He finds himself asking. Kankuro stares at him. One blink. Two blinks, three. And then he's leaning down with a sigh to pull up his pant leg.

 

“We don't scar.” He replies, brushing his hand over an unblemished leg. The bullet wound that Sasuke caused should be in that spot, but it's not.

 

“What?” Tenten says around a gasp, head turning this way and that. Everyone is as shocked as she is, so she gets no answers. “What?” She says again.

 

Temari sighs heavily, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. She folds her arms and stares forward blankly.

 

“We told you, didn't we?” She mutters. “Who our father was?”

 

Sasuke doesn't know this story. He’s only knows bits and pieces.

 

A madman, who collected Model Six children for his own selfish and twisted means. He tortured them, experimented on them, threw them away when they were too broken to fix. He found orphans, those who wouldn't be missed, and used them up until he couldn’t.

 

It's why Temari, Kankuro, and Gaara don't share blood, but consider themselves siblings. They survived him together. High on that cliff where the electricity would shudder and flicker with each flick of a switch, he gave them a choice: They could jump. Jump and be caught by the tall rocks that lived below. Those rocks would hold them close and never let them go, either. For freedom they would have to choose between the Devil and the Sea.

 

—They chose the Devil.

At least his house

 Is warm.

 

“He knew everything there was to know about cloning. He mastered implanting consciousnesses into other bodies. Anything you could think of, he tried.” She continues. “We were his favorites, so he didn't test that on us. Others weren't so lucky.”

 

“He went too far, sometimes.” Gaara says. That same haunted look is back, the one from the other day, and—

 

  _Oh._

 

Sasuke understands. He understands. That look that followed his suspicion wasn't directed towards Sasuke, when they questioned how he could still be considered active if he was possibly dead.

 

He knew then that something was wrong. Temari did too, it must have been why she came along, to confirm.

 

“I'm probably right, but I hope I'm not.” She had said.

 

 _Shit_.

 

“After one of his….tests, Kankuro didn't wake up.” Sasuke’s never seen him so shaken, so triggered, so raw. It's hard to watch.

 

“And then I did.” Kankuro finishes slowly. There a pause, quiet enough to allow the other shoe to drop. “But not for a while. It took nearly a year for him to grow a new body for me and that was a rush job. It takes nearly three for it to be perfected. Once he had one ready, he transferred me to it since that was to be more...permanent.”

 

No one knows what to say. They stare at each other, uncomfortable, unsure what to do with this information. It's Sora that speaks up next.

 

“So...you're the what, third Kankuro?” He asks innocently. A simple question from a child, so Kankuro doesn't seem to take offense to it.

 

“More or less.”

 

“Why do you not scar?” Kimimaro asks, head tilting curiously.

 

“It's purely artificial skin. It heals very quickly. Nothing sticks. I nearly had my hand sawed off once, but you wouldn't be able to tell.” He says it casually, like it doesn't matter. Sasuke’s heart breaks for him.

 

“So you know that Sasuke’s not a clone because…?” Ino questions, looking back at him.

 

Kankuro stands, pulling up his hair to show one sharp, tiny little pinprick in the back of his neck. Everyone leans forward to see it better.

 

“There's only one mark that stays. From a needle, during the transfer.” Temari says quietly.

 

Naruto strides forward before she can say anything else, lifting up Sasuke’s hair and searching for a needle mark. Kiba crowds up behind him, as well as Shikamaru, and they all breathe out a collective sigh of relief when they find nothing there.

 

“He's too marked, anyway,” Gaara says, “They can't fake some of those scars and the way the skin’s grown around them. That's natural. Technology is great, but not that great.”

 

Sasuke finds strange comfort in that. His scars prove that he's an original, just like his beating heart proves that he's human.

 

“Hold on,” Lee says, when everyone's fallen quiet again. “You said it took a year for your father to grow your first cloned body, right? So how did they make one of Sasuke so fast?”

 

A valid question. Sasuke had been thinking that too, once he calmed down and was able to breathe again. Is he wrong for feeling relief, after Kankuro revealed what he did? The other man seems at peace with it or at least accepting after so many years, but he wonders if it's still painful at times to know that he died once, no twice, before.

 

He understands why this wasn't shared, as it is an uncomfortable subject. Snyths like them—can they even call themselves that anymore? Knowing what they know?—don’t consider themselves human. They're rather...othered. Sasuke experienced the fear of being a clone, a copy of himself for mere days. He can't imagine knowing for certain that he was and that there was nothing he could do about it.

 

“Do you think they had one on standby?” Sora asks. “You know, ready to take over if something happened to him?”

 

“Maybe.” Temari says. “But I think they're force growing them. It's possible to make one faster than a year or three. But when they do, they aren’t quite...right, I guess you could say. They aren't all the way there.”

 

“The one we saw looked empty, almost. Just the basics to make him appear like Sasuke.” comments Gaara. He looks at Sasuke then, appraising. Sasuke feels like maybe the man is looking at him for the first time. “There wasn't a soul.”

 

“This is fucked.” Kiba grunts. “Like, seriously fucked. First the anti-matter, now chia-pet clones? What the hell is going on within the government?”

 

“Are you really surprised?” Shikamaru questions him. “We knew there was tons of illegal and messed up shit going on. Clearly, we hadn't even scratched the surface.”

 

Sasuke barely hears any of this, too relieved for words. He takes a few steadying breaths and sits before his legs give out again. Sakura joins him, rubbing his back in comfort.

 

“Has everyone calmed down, now?” Sai says around a smile. He's going to try and lighten the mood, like he does best, but he has to know he'll be dealing with a tough crowd.

 

The question was directed towards him, mostly, so he'll answer it.

 

“Yes.” He says quietly, and the room springs back to life.

 

“Good,” Kiba comments. He stands in front of Sasuke with folded arms, frowning down at him. “Maybe now we can talk about why you immediately jumped to ritual suicide for a minute there, dude.”

 

“Oh, like everyone here isn't fucked up.” Sora snorts, shrugging his shoulders.

 

“That's true.” Tenten admits. “Give him a break, guys, if it were me I probably wouldn't have had the balls to say it, even if I was thinking it.”

 

“No one can say Chuckles isn't hardcore.” Sai adds.

 

Naruto isn't playing along with everyone's forced lightheartedness, looking at Sasuke with that same odd look.

 

“He thought he may have compromised us.” Naruto says seriously. Everyone stops talking at once. “He was trying to rectify it the best way he knew how. That’s serious dedication, something I haven't seen from any of you. This isn't something to fucking laugh about. ”

 

“Sorry.” Sora mumbles. The others look properly chastised.

 

“Its fine, Naruto.” Sasuke soothes. He’s found his voice once more, using it to ease the energy in the room.

 

Something tickles at the back of his mind. Something he heard through the fog. He won't say it in front of the others. He'll have to wait, to confirm what he thinks he knows.

 

“I may have overreacted a bit.” He admits.

 

“A bit?” Shikamaru echoes. “I thoughts I was going to have to slap some sense into you. You looked fucking dead inside.”

 

“You probably should have.”

 

“Is the offer still open?” Kiba asks, frown firmly in place. He's still quite upset. Sasuke wonders if he should give him a hug. It seems foolish to still think his presence doesn't matter to him. To them. Of course they'd be upset when he freely offered his life.

 

He'll have to be more careful with his words in the future. The next time he volunteers to die he won't be so pathetic about it.

 

“If you want.”

 

“Now, now, there's no need for that.” Sakura protests, stopping Kiba in his tracks when he steps forward to do just that.

 

“You should probably go back to sleep, Sasuke,” Ino offers. “You look like shit. We can worry about what comes tomorrow when it comes.”

 

What comes next will be worse. They'll have to return to the outpost for what they planned originally. They'll have to...take care of his clone, one way or another, for the next steps to go smoothly. But Ino’s right, he's drained and he doesn't want to think about anything else but resting.

 

He's getting fretted over by the women so he can't protest. Sakura offers him more food while Ino talks about a bath and Tenten pushes him towards his room.

 

He catches Gaara’s eye as he's being pushed away, and the other man gives him a curt, companionable nod. They'll need to talk later, for sure.

 

He's tucked in like a child. Part of his grateful for it, the other part deeply embarrassed. He made a fool of himself in front of everyone, freaked out like it was the end of the world over something Kankuro has to live with every day. Had everyone worried and babying him like he's not a grown man.

 

He lets his shame and relief flow out in the form of hot tears, not sure what he'd have done if this life he was living wasn't truly his to live. He covers his eyes with his arms even though there's no one where to see.

 

Naruto quietly makes his way in sometime later, sitting down on the edge of the bed and touching his leg in comfort. Sasuke lets him for a moment, as he sobs softly into his hands. The dam broke, finally, and the weight of all this flows like a river at high tide.

 

The tickle returns, stronger than before. Probably because Naruto’s nearby instead of standing across the room. Still, somehow he feels like he can't reach him.

 

“You knew.” Sasuke whispers, muffled by the shield of his own hands.

 

He doesn't have to look at Naruto’s face to know that it's stricken. Guilty.

 

“I—” He begins, but Sasuke doesn't let him.

 

“You asked Gaara and Temari how it was possible back there on the hill, since you knew it was supposed to take longer than a couple of months. They told you, and you hesitated about the plan because you knew my clone was a possibility, right?”

 

It quiet. So quiet he can hear something fracturing in slow degrees. He'd reach for it, try to hold it close, but he's using his hands to cover his tears.

 

“I did.” There's no point in denying it. Naruto wouldn't insult his intelligence by denying it when he's already figured it out.

 

“We had to be sure. I hoped they we wrong but—we had to be sure.”

 

“You could have warned me.” He mumbles, heart trying to beat right out of his chest. He wonders if Naruto can hear it.

 

“I could have. I should have. I knew you wouldn't take it well.”

 

“So catching me by surprise was better?” He pulls his hands away, angry. But it fades at the look on his love’s face. He knows Naruto didn't mean to hurt him, but this is—fucked. Borrowing Kiba’s earlier words, it's fucked.

 

“I’m sorry.” Naruto says, breaking. Sasuke can't help but brush the stray tear away, but it's too painful to look him in the eyes.

 

“Fuck,” he mutters, laughing even though he finds nothing funny. Naruto’s face falls even further.  “You drive me crazy.”

 

“I know.” Naruto whispers softly.

 

Sasuke turns to face the wall, pulling the covers up to his chin. Naruto brushes his hair softly, nearly lulling him to sleep.  He lets him, telling himself he's too tired to brush him off.

 

They don't talk much, after that.


	7. Oculi

* * *

 

 **Seven**.

 

_As if the first blood_

_Didn't thrill enough_

_I went further out to see what else_

_Was left of us_

 

—Pool, Paramore

* * *

 

 

**A.**

 

He takes a day. Only a day, to get his thoughts in order, before setting off himself. It's his responsibility after all. Loose ends lay limp in his own hands.

 

Many things lay limp it seems, but those thoughts get pushed to the back of his mind in favor of the task at hand.

 

He leaves a note at least, since he's more determined than petty at the moment. He also plans to return in a week if the conditions are forgiving and he'd rather not be barred at the door for disappearing without a word. Even if they know full well where he's headed.

 

Part of him wanted to mention it to Naruto himself, but he couldn't. Somehow, it feels like betrayal, his omissions. Or, if he's honest, Sasuke doesn't fully understand what happened between them, what _keeps_ happening between them. Tit for tat, this for that. Were they like this before? He doesn't think so. They never kept so much from each other, never colluded with others against one another. Such small things— littered about between their warmth and togetherness— that grow into something ugly.

 

He lied first, he guesses, if this is a game of semantics. But how harmful was it to hide old bonds? Not nearly as damaging as Sasuke questioning his entire existence. Naruto knew how much it would hurt him, when he already feels like he's barely anchored as it is. His ties to this world seem fleeting, and it would be explained a little too easily if he found out he wasn't the real Sasuke at all.

 

Still, he confuses himself, wanting desperately to reach out and hold his love, promise to forget the whole thing and move past it. They are better than this, more mature and in control of themselves to give the silent treatment. He just wants to hold his hand and count his lucky stars that Naruto would no doubt squeeze back.  

 

He craves this, but cannot stand the sight of him. Every movement Naruto made the previous day, every whisper spoken to someone else as they poorly tiptoed around each other made Sasuke nearly boil over. He wanted to demand what else was being kept from him, what else needed to be _confirmed_ at his expense. It's entirely unreasonable but he feels it all the same.

 

Pathetic.

 

He leaves early in the morning, before the sun has fully made an appearance. No one has stirred just yet, but he takes a zigzagged path to keep the floor from creaking as best he can, leaving the note placed in the center of the table. Someone will see it, hopefully before Naruto sets into a rant or on the warpath at his absence.

 

He hopes they won't follow, but he's not an idiot—even if the evidence argues against that—knowing them, they'll probably beat him there.

 

Kimimaro is the only one awake. He's never had much need for sleep so he's up early tending to his plants. He sees Sasuke, eyes filling with warmth and hand raising in a companionable wave. Sasuke considers ignoring him, but immediately feels terrible about it. He's never done anything wrong and constantly shows concern for Sasuke’s wellbeing, so he won't treat him—or anyone else—badly just because he's angry at one little lamb in their wayward flock.

 

One? Isn’t it two? He’s always angry at Gaara, but this counts worse than his other offenses, doesn't it? Maybe it's three. He isn't quite sure.

 

He takes a moment to squat down beside him, staring absently at the fledgling plants as they sway gently in the breeze.

 

“You are up early.” Kimimaro comments.

 

Sasuke shrugs, taking at apple that's passed to him. He hadn't even thought about breakfast, only packing what he needed for his journey. He takes a bite.

 

“So are you.” He says around a mouthful. Kimimaro mirrors his lazy shrug. It looks more natural now, like he knows the associations for certain emotions instead of copying what he sees around him. Weirdly, Sasuke feels like a proud parent.

 

“I do not need much sleep.” Kimimaro says casually. He pauses, then looks wistfully out to the horizon. “The world is most beautiful when it is waking up.”

 

Sasuke can agree with that.

 

“Listen…” He starts, unsure how he should phrase this. He wonders if it's a good idea to get the other man to lie for him, to cover his tracks, but he's sure the others won't believe it if he cooks up some lie about his whereabouts for Kimimaro to feed to them. They'll know immediately where he's set off to. It's not fair to him anyway so Sasuke won't make him do that.

 

“I'm going to take care of something, I’ll be back soon.” He says. Kimimaro blinks at him, head tilting in confusion.

 

“Alone?” He asks.

 

“Yes. I think that's best.” He confirms.

 

Sasuke smothers a chuckle at the look on his face. It's the one he makes when he can't reconcile his thoughts with a suitable response. It appears more often these days, since their little Two has started to become more outspoken and contrary, like a child just learning how to say no.

 

“I...do not want to insult you by doubting your abilities, but is that not dangerous and...foolhardy? This world is not kind to solo wanderers.” He says slowly, like he's picking his words very carefully.

 

If Sasuke’s not mistaken, hidden deep behind flowery speech, he just called him a dumbass.

 

Ha.

 

Sasuke smirks, shrugging again. Kimimaro has what can be classified as a pout of his face, and it makes him want to laugh again.

 

“It is. But I feel like I need to do this on my own, alright?” He says seriously, sobering. “I left a note on the table, but if anyone asks you can tell them what I said. Tell them I'd prefer it if they didn't follow, too. I don't plan on doing anything stupid, just what we agreed upon, okay?”

 

It takes a moment, but Kimimaro nods reluctantly.

 

Sasuke pats his shoulder, standing. Kimimaro watches him stand, confliction dancing in his eyes, but he says nothing.

 

“I’ll be fine. Don't worry about me.” Sasuke says, flashing a confident smile. He didn't make it this far just by being lucky.

 

“Impossible.” Kimimaro responds immediately, so firm and resolute that it surprises him. “I worry for all of you. Your focus leaves little room for fear or value for your own lives, so that responsibly falls to me. I...have not faced the darkness as the rest of you have. I do not know all of it's horrors, but that matters not, since I will not let the void take you.”

 

Sasuke blinks.

 

He's not at all sure what to say, especially since that's the most he's heard the stoic man speak at once. It touches him that Kimimaro cares so much, and somehow he's still startled by the faith and loyalty he inspires in others. For once, thoughts of unworthiness do not spring forth to his lips in denial. Instead, he feels emboldened and dare he say, loved? A foreign concept that he should try to get used to.

 

“Thank you.” He says, and he truly means it. “That means a lot. I appreciate it.”

 

Kimimaro nods, not looking at him, dainty blush staining his cheeks. He seems startled by his own admission, but shadows of pride also accompany it. Sasuke understands that feeling all too well.  At last, he’s learned the meaning of embarrassment. What great progress.

 

“May I...have a hug...before you go?” He asks, and Sasuke cringes at the same time he does from the awkwardness of it. He wasn't the only one emboldened, apparently.

 

He holds his arms out, relenting, and Kimimaro rises and carefully steps into the embrace. Sasuke pats his back awkwardly.

 

“Will you want another one when I return?” He asks.

 

“Undoubtedly.” Kimimaro responds quickly. It's slightly smothered by his face being pressed into Sasuke’s shoulder.

 

Sasuke rolls his eyes—affectionately, of course—when Kimimaro holds on for what would be considered socially unacceptable by anyone else’s standards.

 

He realizes this a few moments later, stepping back slowly so they're a few inches apart. The pout is back, but he seems to be in much higher spirits than he was a few moments ago.

 

“Thank you.” He murmurs. “I will let you be off. I will also try to keep Naruto from destroying half of the countryside to find you.” He says matter-of-factly, in that way only he can.

 

Sasuke can't catch his chuckle then, and soon they’re both shaking with laughter.

 

“Tell him he can hit me as hard as he wants when I get back.”

 

Kimimaro shakes his head, face coloring with great concern. “No. We cannot have that. I already told you that I do not want you to die.”

 

Sasuke really hates he can't tell if he's trying to make a joke or not.

 ...

 

The outpost is just as he left it: half-deserted, cold, and miserable. The humans mull about in a haze, bored out of their minds. It's honestly too easy to slip inside without an alarm being raised.

 

There's a part of him that wishes he could give them pointers on how not to be bad at their jobs. The other part praises the sky above that he can take advantage of their inattention.

 

He's frustratingly complicated at the worst of times.

 

Now that he's inside, he has no idea what he should do. This plan was shaky at best, completely ridiculous at worst. He's pretty sure Naruto only agreed to coming here so they could confirm if he was cloned or not. He never cared about Juugo and the others in any sense, fully planning on killing them if they showed up at Ethelred. Sasuke isn't too keen on letting that happen, so he'll at least try.

 

Who knows, since Kakashi disappeared they could have different orders entirely. He figured that they were placed here to keep them out of trouble until they government could figure out what's going on so they might not be on the move for a while.

 

It may be a long time before the two groups crossed paths again. Longer if his team succeed on leaking the information they know to the public.

 

Probably not, but it's nice to dream.  

 

His plan of action is decided for him when he slips into the closest dark room with his back turned, watching out for two guards that are roaming the halls. He didn't detect anyone inside, so he quietly shuts the door and leans against it, heart thundering at the possibility of being caught.

 

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, steadying himself. When he opens them, two glowing eyes stare back at him in the darkness.

 

He bites down a shout.

 

“Ah.” The other says, eyes focused and unblinking, “You're the real one, aren't you?”

 

A light comes on. Sasuke’s not sure from where. He didn't see the other move once. He wishes that it would turn off again, because he doesn't like what he sees.

 

His clone stands in front of him, so strange and jarring and _wrong_ that Sasuke feels like he might throw up. The feeling isn't as visceral at the first time, which means he's probably past the worst of it, but its existence still makes him wildly uncomfortable.

 

How did he not notice his signature inside the room?

 

Ah.

 

It's identical to his own, isn't it?

 

He's too smooth, as Kankuro pointed out. Like someone wrapped cellophane around a wire mannequin. Sasuke can see the jut of every bone, the hollow of his cheeks, the shallowness around his eyes.

 

 _Empty_ , something whispers. _Not quite right._

 

A quick look, and you'd think he was Sasuke. A long look, and you'd notice the faults.

 

There's no scar above his right eye, slightly separating the hair of his brow, gained after a ring grazed his face when he separated a domestic dispute during his rounds. No white stitched half-moon curving his neck, from when a thief tried cut him open over something as petty as a pilfered evening meal.

 

(Petty to Sasuke, since he never once worried where his food would come from. When he laid healing from the wound, he felt guilty for having to pass down such harsh judgment when the man just wanted to eat.)

 

No uneven cracks dotted on his wrist, from when he carved off the proof of his old ties. No black ink to cover it either, from the renewal of his vows.

 

No old hurt in his eyes, from the questions he'll probably never have the answer to.

 

Too smooth. Too shiny and new. He looks much too clean, like how Sasuke presented himself before. When he aimed to be perfect, to never slip, to leave everything behind to be the perfect soldier. He looks too much like the golden boy Suigetsu always claimed him to be, and it scares him.

 

“How do you know that?” He asks, wondering what gives him away so quickly.

 

The clone regards him quietly, turning its head this way and that, before it shrugs.

 

“There's freedom in you. Strength.” He says softly, and Sasuke swallows thickly. “You're not afraid anymore.”

 

He sounds...sad? Sasuke isn't sure what to make of it. What does that mean? He is afraid. Of everything. Afraid of losing his friends, afraid of failing, afraid of fucking up what he has with Naruto, afraid of dying up here where barely anyone knows his name.

 

It doesn't make any sense. What about him seems absent of fear? What part of him is strong, when he waivers and doubts at every turn?

 

“Why are you here?” Sasuke asks instead questioning him further on that subject.

 

His clone looks away, lost in thought, before smiling in a strange, self-depreciative manner that puts Sasuke on edge.

 

“They thought you were dead.” It says, eyes slowly making their way back to Sasuke’s face.

 

That's not what he meant. He meant here, inside this room. But if his clone is freely offering information…

 

He hates those eyes. So lifeless and unhappy. How many years did he go on like that, until he couldn't take it anymore? Would he still look the same if he never came here?

 

“But they still needed you. They didn't want them to find out.” he continues cryptically.

 

“Who? My father?” Sasuke asks, even though he feels like he knows the answer.

 

“Danzo too. He's quite fond of me. Us. You, I mean.” The clone shakes his head. “Sorry, it's hard not to think of us as the same person. I have your memories.”

 

So he was right about why they kept his disappearance a secret. It's no comfort.

 

“I know.” Sasuke says, feeling sick again.

 

“But I don’t have everything.” It amends, eyes shining in a way that Sasuke’s don't. Like they're made of glass—stained the color of night yet not littered with stars.

 

“Not all of your quirks or your personality. It's hard to get that right in such a short time. They just need me here long enough for the job to get done.”

 

—They made a map of him,

But neglected to fill in

All the points

Of interest.

 

“How long did it take...for you to be, uh, grown?” He asks, awkward and curious. He remembers the others talking about force growing the clones and wants to know if that's what lead to this one's apparent strangeness.

 

“About two months.” He's been gone for five, nearly six.  It took less time than he expected. There's something frightening in that, something horrible and enlightening.

 

They’re in over their heads, up against forces with way better means than them. How can they pull this off when the opposition can pull feats like this? When they have antimatter and the likes at their disposal, when they rule all the known worlds?

 

It always felt daunting, unreal, but Sasuke’s constantly shaken by how far the government will go to maintain the status quo.

 

Sasuke comes to a decision, one he's been mulling over since he discovered this clone's existence.

 

He isn't going to kill him.

 

Not yet, at least.

 

Instead, he can use him, if the other is willing. Eyes and ears on the inside. They can benefit from this.

 

“Are you being watched?” He asks. Sasuke needs to know a few things first before he proceeds.

 

“As much as anyone is here.” It replies easily enough. Sasuke can't think of a reason for it to lie, but he has to be sure. “This mission is still supposed to be a secret, so I'm not tracked. Not in the traditional sense. Father demands weekly reports. I've even had to speak with him a few times.”

 

Of course he does.

 

But before Sasuke went missing he never spoke with his father, so why now?

 

At Sasuke’s confusion, the clone continues.

“He got...antsy. He said he hadn't heard anything from his connections up here in a while. He was convinced something was wrong so if they don't want a dent in their funding, the Feds had no choice but to bend to him. You know how he is. ”

 

Of course he does.

 

Sasuke would be impressed if it didn't feel like he was still being babied. But maybe this was Fugaku’s way of showing love for his son. His _actual_ son, as he came to find out.

 

How strange it must have been, for his parents to know that their children were born of their love, but forced to pretend otherwise. How strange indeed, for all the times he looked at his father with their same eyes and that man knew they were inherited instead of implanted.

 

“He loves you.” The clone says casually, mirroring his thoughts. “In his own way. He told me, during one of our talks. He worries about you. ‘More than he should’, he said. He just wants you back safe.”

 

Unfair.

 

That's fucking unfair. Highway fucking robbery, that his clone heard it out of his father's mouth before he did himself.

 

Further still. His father looked at that face and saw Sasuke behind it, acknowledging him as his son. He didn't bother to take a closer look.

 

"Oh.” Is all he can reply.

 

“Shit, I'm not doing this right.” It mumbles. “I shouldn't have told you that. I knew it would upset you. I'm not good at this.”

 

Sasuke knows that. He isn't good at it, either.

 

“It's not important.” It very much is. “I wanted to ask you if you can do something for me. I need your help.”

 

“Name it.” His clone says, looking grim and serious once more instead of ashamed.

 

“If you can stay here and...keep assuming my place for the moment, it'll make things easier in the long run.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Before I answer that, can I trust you?” That's a trick question: he can't trust anyone, not fully. That much has been proven to him. Still, there's some that he obviously holds in high regards, and strangely he'd like to think he could count his own clone among them.

 

The clone smirks in a way that's way more Sasuke than Sasuke is himself. “I'm not attached to any of these people.” He says. There's almost a sinister note behind it, but Sasuke’s going to choose to ignore it. “You're only loyal to yourself, remember? And I'm you, so what does that tell you?”

 

That's not true. He pretended like it was for the longest time but that was never the case. He tells him as much, and the clone only raises his hands in mock surrender, conceding a little too easily.

 

“If that's what you want to believe, fine.” Sasuke says, feeling strangely unnerved by the stranger wearing his face trying to tell him truths about himself. Other-Sasuke _is_ wrong, but he's not going to spend time trying to convince him of it. “Swear to me we're on the same side.”

 

There's no trace of jest in his voice when he says. “Of course.” So Sasuke feels it's safe to move forward.

 

“Alright, then.” He mumbles. “How much do you know?”

 

“The mission objective and identities of the rebels.” He responds, eyes strangely alight. “Did you find them? Are you working with them?” The clone asks.

 

“Should I tell you that? Are you sure no one is listening in?”

 

“They aren't.” Other-Sasuke says, voice hard.

 

“ _Really?_ ” He presses.

 

“ ** _Sasuke_**.” His other grinds out, annoyed. Sasuke can't help but chuckle, finally finding some humor in the situation.

 

Still, his own voice calling his name will never not be weird.

 

“Sorry, sorry.” He relents. “I can't help but be paranoid, even if it's me.”

 

“Did you find them?” His clone repeats, eyes fixed. He looks hopeful and young, eyes round like the moon. Somehow it's comforting, to see that old hope that Sasuke himself carried around written all over his face.

 

“I did.” he confirms. The clone smiles, nodding to himself. Sasuke feels like he's about to make his day more than he already has. “I even told Naruto that I love him.”

 

The clone blinks once. Twice. Three times, before he's smiling brilliantly.

 

“What did he say?” He asks. Too curious, they're going to get off topic but he can't help himself.

 

“He's fine with it. We're...together. He felt the same way for a long time, too.” He can leave out the recent, unpleasant developments for now. Someone can come out of this with hope for the future, at least.

 

The clone nods, obviously happy. Sasuke’s warmed at the sight.

 

“Good, that's good.” He says. “So you're working with them. What's the goal, what are we after?”

 

It's easy enough to convince him to do what he wants. Well, he is talking to himself, isn't he? It didn't take much for the first Sasuke to switch sides, so why should it for the second?

 

Sasuke won't correct him on the “we”. They're in this together now. Somehow, it's strangely comforting.

 

“We need to get into Ethelred. Are you all still going to be stationed there, for the summit?”

 

“That was the plan. I haven't heard anything different.”

 

Sasuke nods. “Good, good. I was going to convince the others not to show and I sort of...planned to... kill you? I think I have a better idea, though.” He can't help but scratch his head sheepishly at his admission.

 

The clone shrugs nonchalantly. “Makes sense. No harm done.” He looks at him mischievously, eyes glinting. “I would have done the same.”

 

Sasuke will kick himself forever for not being the one to make a similarly styled joke between the two of them.

 

“I'm thinking you should go on as planned with your assignment, and then you can go ahead and get us inside. We’ll take care of the clearance and get you the floorplans and whatnot, and you open the door and provide cover. I'll have to talk it through with Juugo, Karin, and Suigetsu, but we can do it without them if need be.”

 

Other-Sasuke nods, considering. “Alright. They'll probably go for it, too. Suigetsu's pissed that they've been forced out of action and Karin and Juugo just want to go home. If it's you, they'll follow.”

 

“Why did you all get sent up here?” Sasuke asks.

 

“Everyone was suspicious about Kakashi’s disappearance. They thought your supposed death was connected somehow, and until they figure out what's going on, we're stuck here until the summit so we'll be out of the way. The humans on the team even vouched for us, said we didn't do anything wrong, but you know how it is.”

 

“So there's really no trace of him still?”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Strange.” Sasuke feels nothing for Kakashi, but he sincerely doubts that he's dead. There's something they're all missing here, something deeply-woven and wrong, but he has no idea where to start with it.

 

“Tell me about it.” He replies. “Anyway, I think they'll listen to you if it's for the greater good. I'm assuming it is, anyway, since you haven't told me what the rebels are after.”

 

He believes that his clone is on his side, but he's not comfortable with sharing that just yet.

 

“I can't tell you that.” He says. “Not yet.”

 

The clone huffs, rolling his eyes. He doesn't seem upset, though. He probably knew Sasuke wouldn't easily give up the goods.

 

“I figured. It's fine. You might have trouble convincing them if you won't tell them the point of all this, though.”

 

He has a point.

 

“I'll figure it out.” He replies with a shrug. “So we have a deal?”

 

The look he gets in return could peel paint. Sasuke can't help but chuckle. “I already said we did, didn't I?”

 

“Sorry, sorry. I'm kidding.”

 

His clone shakes his head at him. “I know.” he waves him off. “Be careful out there. They're all itching for some action.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

They trail off awkwardly. Sasuke doesn't really want to leave him here, feeling oddly connected now. It only makes sense seeing as how they _are_ connected, but it feels wrong to leave him in this lonely storeroom when they're now brothers-in-arms. Co- Conspirators, or something.

 

The same fucking person.

 

Speaking of which:

 

“Why were you in here, anyway?” He asks, curious.

 

“Banishment, sort of.” The clone replies. “Suigetsu hates looking at me, says I freak him out. He told me to make myself scarce when I'm not needed because I'm ‘sure as fuck not the real Sasuke.’ I make Karin and Juugo uncomfortable too; the latter more than the former. Karin still likes having your face to look at.”

 

Sasuke must make a face, because his clone sucks his teeth and waves a hand around dismissively.

 

“Don't. It's fine. They have the right to feel the way they do. They'll be happy to see you.” He mumbles quietly.

 

“Still…” Sasuke begins, unsure.

 

“I'm just the replacement. You don't need to pity me. It's not like I care what Suigetsu thinks of me anyway. I hate him.”

 

Sasuke shakes his head, smile tugging at the edge of his lips at his petulance despite himself.

 

“No you don't.” He says softly. Other-Sasuke snorts, rolling his eyes—affectionately, of course.

 

“You're right.” He admits. Who would know him better than himself? “We don't.”

* * *

 

**B.**

He'll find them on the battlements. Other-Sasuke says as much.

 

He needs something else to call him, not satisfied with calling him an “it” in his head. It's rude and demeaning, and he deserves better than that.

 

His clone thinks for a minute, forehead scrunched in concentration before the figurative light bulb shines in his eyes.

 

“Taka.” He says confidently.

 

He doesn't have to explain. Sasuke knows, of course. From when he was young and dreamed of himself as a bird, flying far, far away from his station to disappear into the clouds. He understands.

 

It's fitting.

 

A slow crawl, up to the top. The hallways are confusing, winding and too open for his liking. He still avoids the humans easily enough, dodging them with expert catlike reflexes.

 

It's too quiet and gloomy in here. He wonders if the posts closer to the cities are full of life. Everything on Delta-1 seems so subdued, isolated. Part of him is glad he never got shipped up here when he wanted to, because he never would have survived the pale monotony he's seen around here.

 

It would have taken nothing to convince the younger him to arm himself and change the world. It would have taken even less to arm himself and blow his own head off if forced to live a life so dull, day in and day out. A dark thought, but life in the Capitol was much livelier than this. The others must truly be miserable.

 

He finds a door that's unlocked, leading upward. He climbs a rickety ladder to find himself firmly planted on old, weathered stones. The view is beautiful from up here, as beautiful as the wind is biting, but he doesn’t have time to enjoy it.

 

He thinks he might be getting close, even more so when he hears Suigetsu's loud voice carrying in the breeze, incensed and rowdy about something or other. The sound of it is oddly calming, and Sasuke find himself drawn to it.

 

He pauses mid-step, as a thought strikes him.

 

What need was there, to sneak around?

 

Once he was inside, there was no purpose on hiding around corners and jumping clear of the guards. They know that there's a Sasuke walking around. There was never any indication that any of them would know which one he himself was. Taka wasn't planning on coming out of his hiding place until much later, so there wasn't going to be a case of some confused guard seeing double.

 

He nearly wore himself out, for no reason.

 

Damn.

 

Whatever. No point in mulling over it now. At least there was no one around to see it.  He walks over slowly, seeing Juugo leaning with his back pressed against the stone wall, listening to Suigetsu rant whatever he's on about. Karin’s legs are swung over the wall, gun sitting haphazardly in her lap. They're probably supposed to be on guard, but nothing’s going to happen all the way out here and they know it.

 

Seeing Juugo, he's unspeakably relieved. He'd been told that they were fine, but seeing them here in the flesh takes some of the purpose from his step. He feels himself sag, grossly overjoyed that his fears weren't realizes. Instead, they're here, shooting the breeze like the last few months didn't happen.

 

Juugo notices his approach, slowed as it is. Sasuke feels himself falter, self-conscious and all too aware of himself. He doesn't know what to say. Even more so when he sees the look in the other man's eyes. It's unnerved, uncomfortable, just like Taka said it would be. He looks...sad, a deep longing there that upsets Sasuke to his core.

 

He doesn't get the chance to say anything before Suigetsu notices Juugo’s straying attention. He looks over, scoffing at the sight of Sasuke, before turning to face forward once more. Karin turns as well but her gaze lingers longer. When she notices his stare, she looks away.

 

“You need something?” Suigetsu asks roughly, not looking at him. “I thought I told you not to show your face.”

 

“Suigetsu,” Juugo begins in warning, trying to keep the peace.

 

“What?” He replies angrily, still facing elsewhere. “I'm not in the mood for this shit right now.”

 

Is it really so hard to look at him? Or he should say, to look at who they think is Taka? Naturally. Sasuke felt the same, not too long ago.

 

Not quite right. Not all there.

 

Suigetsu must be boiling on the inside, since he decided he and Sasuke had a rivalry all on his own years ago, and he's deeply insulted that he has to face this farce in any capacity.

 

Part of Sasuke knew that Suigetsu always had a healthy respect for him, even though they often butted heads. It was his fault that they have as much friction as they do, since there were many times that the white haired man made friendly overtures towards him that he shut down or brushed off completely.

 

He purposely ignored the looks of disappointment that sometimes followed them, choosing instead to remain good at being the moody, lonely, melodramatic loser. Juugo too, in a sense. He knew the bigger man was attached to him and looked out for his wellbeing, but Sasuke told himself that it was only because they worked on close quarters. Juugo’s always been kind to him, but he never acknowledged him as he should have.

 

Karin, well, he never outright rejected her advances, but he didn't encourage her either. He voiced that he'd much rather have their relationship be a professional one, so he can't say that he horribly mistreated her. He could have been kinder. He could have been a lot of things, but there's no easy repair for that.

 

“I’m sorry.” Sasuke says, apologizing for much more than his presence at the moment.

 

“Whatever.” Suigetsu grunts, content to ignore him. Or not, since a few moments later he asks: “What do you want?”

 

He might as well jump right into it.

 

“I need your help.” He should come out and reveal his identity, but he hesitates. What if they don't believe him?

 

“Help?” Karin parrots, fully confused. Suigetsu snorts again, incredulous, like this fake-Sasuke has some damn nerve.

 

Juugo stares at him silently, appraising. Sasuke tries not to fidget under his scrutiny.

 

“Yeah right.” Suigetsu grunts. “Fuck off, will you?”

 

He's tempted to, rapidly losing his nerve. Is it such a good idea to tell them the truth? Can he trust that they won't betray him? They're fond of him, but is that enough to convince them to commit treason if they agree to help him? If things go wrong, they could never see Earth again. They're rebels at heart, too, but that isn't anywhere close to being the real thing.

 

It was instilled in them since childhood. The fear of being branded a traitor, a dissenter. That's a hard mold to break. Their pull to his side wouldn’t be nearly as strong as his was to Naruto and the others.

 

Too much must show on his face, too much conflict and doubt, too much emotion for an empty clone to have because Juugo’s suddenly taking an abortive step forward, hand outstretched in question.

 

“ _Sasuke?”_ He whispers, nearly a gasp. There's so much wrapped within his name, so heavy with hope and concern and disbelieving question that all Sasuke can do is stupidly nod.

 

“We established that, big guy.” Suigetsu says, voice dripping with snark, but he notices the strange look on Juugo’s face so he can't help but take a closer, longer look at Sasuke’s face. Sasuke hasn't taken his eyes off of Juugo, but he hears the other man’s sharp intake of breath and muffled curse.

 

“What?” Karin asks, sweetly lost. She looks back and forth between the lot of them, not understanding.

 

“That you?” Suigetsu questions, quieter than he's ever heard him. “The real you?”

 

Karin nearly falls off the ledge, quickly catching herself and swinging her legs around to plant them on the ground.

 

“What?!” She asks again, voice rising an octave. “Are you serious?”

 

Juugo smiles widely, stepping forward to embrace him. Suddenly, they’re laughing, full of joy and relief and amazement and God, this feels surprisingly good. Karin rushes forward as soon as Juugo pries himself away—which seems to take a lot of effort—looking as if she's holding back tears. She says many things too quickly for him to catch, so he just nods along and grips her back.

 

Sasuke’s gotten more hugs this week than he's gotten in years. It's kind of nice.

 

Suigetsu hasn't moved, rooted to the spot, but he's grinning wide and his eyes are bright.

 

“I fucking _knew_ there was no way you were dead!” He nearly shouts, unashamedly excited. Sasuke nods to him, shrugging to hide his embarrassment. He's a little flustered at their joy. It still feels strange that people are happy to see him. He wonders if that'll ever stop.

 

“What happened to you?” Karin asks, hovering close. Suigetsu steps forward finally, looking a little unsure of himself. Sasuke can tell what he wants but he knows the other man won't offer it in fear of embarrassment.

 

He's having a pretty good day, so he'll put his own pride aside.

 

Sasuke places a hand on Karin’s shoulder to signify that he’ll answer her in a moment. He turns his attention to the white haired man, asking: “Do you want a hug as well?” His face screws up just like Sasuke knew it would, too manly and cool to stoop so low.

 

“Fuck you.” Suigetsu says, still grinning. It waivers ever so like the conflict in his eyes, showing that he's considering it.

 

“Last chance.” He replies, raising his eyebrow.

 

Suigetsu blinks at him, before looking away. Sasuke holds his hands out expectantly, patiently waiting.

 

“Just do it already,” Karin groans. “You've been crying over him and bullying that damn clone for weeks and now you wanna act tough all of a sudden?”

 

Suigetsu sputters, face coloring like a tomato. Sasuke smothers a chuckle while the others laugh outright. He takes a step closer. They still don't make eye contact when the other man finally falls into him, but that's probably for the best. He doesn't want to come off like he's teasing him, not right now. There will hopefully be time for that, later.

 

“Alright, alright, enough!” He cries, even though he noticeably stayed in the embrace longer than the others did. “Where have you been?” He demands.

 

Sasuke scratches the back of his head, wonder how to phrase what he's going to say next.

 

“That's a lot of explain. After I tell you, there's something I want to ask. It’s maybe a bit of, um, treason—” Their eyes widen at that, so he hurries on. “— _But_ it's your choice and you can always say no. At least hear me out, first.”

 

Karin nods dutifully while Suigetsu shrugs. Juugo hasn't stopped looking at him like maybe he hung the moon and Sasuke can feel his own nasty blush coming on at their easy support.

 

“Get on with it, then.” Suigetsu says impatiently, waving him on. He's obviously covering up his feelings with aggression but Sasuke won't call him on it. There's much more important things to discuss at the moment. “Hell, it's not like we're doing anything else. I'm fucking dying up here.” He says with a wild grin. It scarily reminds him of Naruto.

 

He’s not sure what to make of that.

 

* * *

 

**C.**

 

He curves the small hill that leads to the farmhouse, arriving just as the sun is setting. The dark shadows have begun to settle in, as well as the night chill. Sasuke quickens his weary pace in the hopes of meeting a warm blanket faster. 

 

He still made it back under a week, like he promised, but he stayed a bit longer than he meant to so they could catch up and solidify plans. The others had agreed. They were willing to work with him to enter the fortress.

 

“No loyalty to the crown” Suigetsu had said. Karin wants a change of pace. Nothing says change of pace like risking their lives to break into a government facility. Juugo knew his reasoning must be good to have to go this far. He swore to them that it was, explaining that he couldn't tell them everything just yet and that it would all come out in the end. They were a bit sore about that but understood that Sasuke has to keep some secrets that aren’t his to tell.

 

He’s fortunate, to have friends like these.

 

Still, even if he’d be ushering in good news—a solid, tangible plan. Men on the inside. A copy of himself, front and center—he was still out of line. He went off on his own and could have compromised them if he'd been caught or tortured. He could have been lying this whole time and he was using the opportunity to betray them. He's sure that Naruto and the others must have thought all kinds of things while he away, and he'll have trouble convincing them that he's not some stupid, reckless fool.

 

Even if that's the truth.

 

He's sure by Naruto’s calculations that he's late. It took nearly two days to get there, so it should have taken nearly two to return. Four days.

 

It's nearing the end of day six.

 

He could have turned his comm on, sent word that he was fine. But he didn't. A small vacation from their stifled bed, in a sense. He hadn't been so ready to part with the others so soon after they were reunited, and he served as a mediator between Taka and Suigetsu so they could learn to get along for the success of their upcoming task.

 

It was wrong of him not to and Naruto has every right to be upset. They weren't in the greatest place when he departed, and Sasuke wouldn't be surprised if Naruto wanted him gone after this. He desperately wishes that's not the case, but he prepared for it on his journey back.

 

Hopefully, Naruto will see the good in this. He can hate Sasuke all he wants, but as long as he moves forward with the plan so all their hard work come to fruition, that's all that matters.

 

That's a lie.

 

He can't hate Sasuke. He's not allowed to. Never in this lifetime. But if he does indeed, if he kicks him out of the ranks for being a stubborn, martyr-bound little shit that he is, Sasuke will surely perish by his own hands. He swore he wouldn't live without him now that he's found him again, and he means that.

 

—You sure have a funny way

Of showing that,

Soldier.

 

Sasuke enters the house in a near tip-toe, sighing through his nose at his own antics.

 

The evening is still young, so he's not surprised that everyone is awake and out and about. He attempted to open the door quietly, as not to draw attention to himself, but fortune has surely abandoned him since he's abused his for so long.

 

Too many pairs of eyes fly to him at once.

 

“Sasuke!” Ino exclaims, looking genuinely happy to see him, “You're back!”

 

He accepts her embrace when she flutters over to him, looking him over this way and that for knicks or bruises.

 

Shikamaru stares at him from over his book, brow low in disapproval. He looks like a tired old father watching his child returning after sneaking out for the night, eyes sharp and firm.

 

Sasuke shifts from foot to foot, feeling thoroughly chastised even though he hasn't spoken a word.  Sasuke straighten his back when Shikamaru tuts at him.

 

“You're late.” Is all he says, dry as a bone.

 

“I'm not. I said a week.” He would like to think that they actually paid attention to his note. He accounted for this perceived tardiness, almost purposely running it to the last minute of his estimate.

 

“If you say so.” Shikamaru says with a rather force full eye-roll.

 

“Naruto will want to talk to you.” Kiba calls from the other end of the room. He gives Sasuke a look of pity, like he knows what he’s in for. “He did say he expected a report.”

 

Yes, Sasuke remembers. Their room was his next stop after he got something to eat.

 

He's greeted casually by the others as he makes his way through the house. No one comments on his absence, as if they expected it—as much as they expected his return — and he's surprised that no one appears to be all too upset about it.

 

This would be the perfect opportunity to self-doubt, to think that no one cared that he was gone rather than them being confident about his skills and loyalty. It doesn't come. He's had an interesting few days and for once the buzzing in his head doesn't scream of mistrust and false friendship.

 

The buzzing does return, however, as he stands outside the bedroom door. He knows that Naruto’s inside and he hesitates to talk to him. The others might not be upset, but Naruto no doubt will be.

 

Sasuke knows he crossed a line. Part of him was intent on being petty; he left without company because he was lashing out, wanting to show Naruto that two can play that game. If Naruto’s content to make moves without his knowledge, then Sasuke can do the same.

 

But that's not all of it. Sasuke wanted to have control for once. He's deferred to many over the course of his life and he wanted to prove to himself that he could provide results all on his own.

 

Everything up until this point has been wild chance. All the roads that lead here were twisted and illogical, so instead of letting the pages flip by while he struggles to read them, he's going to take a pen and write a few, himself.

 

He's still in control, not being swept away by the will of others. Not disappearing behind Naruto and his ambitions.

 

He pushes the door open quietly, seeing Naruto sitting up on the bed, hands loosely set in his lap. He doesn't acknowledge him at first, content on staring at the peeling the wallpaper like it's the most interesting thing in the world.

 

Sasuke falters again, unsure what he should say. He expects Naruto’s anger. An explosion. He expects to be chastised and possibly punished. Sasuke put the entire group at risk by setting off by himself. He doesn't expect Naruto to overlook that. He also doesn't expect the blank look Naruto gives him, eyes strangely fixed on Sasuke’s fidgeting form in front of him.

 

“I thought maybe you left. For good.” Naruto says calmly, voice not betraying the storm brewing in his eyes. “It made sense to me, after the last few days you've had. Hell, the past few _months_ you've had.”

 

“I wouldn't do that. I did need some time alone but I wasn't planning on leaving. Not over something like that.” He replies, jumping right in without missing a beat.

 

“You were devastated. I wasn't sure where your head was since you refused to talk to me.” Naruto continues in a flat tone, like he's discussing the weather. Sasuke can't tell if this nonchalance is forced or not.

 

He wasn't expecting calm. He was ready for a battle, something explosive, something knock down and drag out like the spats of the past. Sasuke doesn't give Naruto enough credit, hasn't aged him up from the wild, reckless boy with no filter in his head.

 

He's matured, not quick shout anymore. Instead, his status as the leader of this outfit has allowed him to look at things objectively, to sit back and disconnect his own feelings so he can lay out the whole picture.

 

Sasuke would rather that he'd shout. It’s endlessly unnerving when Naruto is calm.

 

“I was feeling a bit spiteful.” Sasuke admits, passing off his nervousness with an easy shrug. Naruto blinks at him.

 

“Oh?” He murmurs, like he didn't already know that.

 

“You lied to me, and I didn't like how you were so against getting help from my old team. It rubbed me the wrong way.” That came out easier than he expected. His difficult personality decides not to show through at the oddest of times.

 

“So that's what this is about? You don't like it when I boss you around?”  Naruto scoffs, face cold and closed off. “You never had a problem with licking boots before, or is it just mine that aren’t to your tastes?”

 

Wow. Alright. Ouch.

 

Naruto realizes immediately that it might have been too far. He swallows thickly, eyes slightly wide, breaking their eye contact for a moment.

 

“That was uncalled for, wasn't it?” He questions after a few beats of awkward silence.

 

“It was. Sorry.” Naruto huffs. “And unfair. I know you aren't my lapdog, Sasuke. I have no intention of controlling you.”

 

Well this is escalating quickly, isn't it? What did he expect? This, and more, since he geared up for carnage on his journey back. It's not quite carnage, but it isn't pretty.

 

“So why shoot me down when we could have more allies? Or was it something against them in particular, since they were tied to me? Did you think I'd run off with them instead?”

 

“Never once have I doubted you.” Naruto grinds out, careful control slipping ever so. “But don't expect that to extend to your friends. They're Hunters. Do you know what people say about Hunters, Sasuke?”

 

He does. Not all of it, but enough.  Tales woven together behind his back as he wore that scarlet letter. It’s hard not to hear the whispers when his ear was always pressed to the ground.

 

“A Hunter would kill his own mother if his handler asked, they say. Why wouldn't he? He's trained to hunt down his own kind who think a little different, who don't want to kiss ass and bow to humans. He’ll call that peace or justice and he won't lose any sleep over it. He'll do it all again the next day because he never stops doing what he's told.”

 

“They aren't like that.” Sasuke protests firmly, brow furrowing. He understands, since that's all outsiders would see looking in. His work as a Hunter was like that in many ways, killing ex neighbors or the pretty little shop girl down the street for resisting her programming, but they aren't all mindless killers.

 

“They knew it was wrong,” Naruto continues, as if he hadn’t heard him. “But they signed up anyway. They clamored to get front row seats to carnage and kill their own brothers. They watched innocents die and did nothing to stop it. I don't care what they're like, since it can’t be anything good.”

 

“Then what of me?” Sasuke asks, feeling ill. “I was the same; I’ve done everything you've said and worse. I killed people I knew. I followed orders I knew were wrong. I did all of that, so what of me? What makes me so different?”

 

That's his worst fear in all of this, isn't it?

 

That he's not.

 

Naruto looks away, face conflicted. Sasuke knew this issue would arise again, at some point, since it was a large part of his life and he's sure that everyone here is disappointed with him on some level because of it.

 

Naruto has such vitriol for the people he doesn't know for the titles they wear, not willing to look past them with the stubborn certainty that only he can have. It isn't fair, since Sasuke is not different; he was just as complacent and let his morals smudge into hazy ambiguity so he could survive.

 

“Part of me will always be disappointed in you for that.” Naruto admits, voice echoing in Sasuke’s ears despite his low tones. “But I'm biased. Because it's you. I don't have a way to explain what that means to me. Not in clear terms or in a way that will make sense. So I can forgive you for the things you've done since you're trying to right them and I do my best not to hold them against you.”

 

“I don't want a free pass just because of who I am to you.” Sasuke retorts, even though what he's said feeds the flame inside him like kindling. “If I deserve a second chance, so should they.”

 

“You don't understand.” Naruto says tersely.

 

There’s a charge in the room. Electrifying. Sasuke can taste its heat and spark, like metal on his tongue. He has to make sure to teeter here, to not fall too deep into waters he's not ready to swim.

 

There are many hidden black holes inside the both of them and he promised himself he'd set off to explore them when they have more time. When they aren't on the run. When their lives aren't on the line. When the world has blossomed and changed by their hand.

 

But doubt has settled, and it gets harder to believe that gentle days are on the horizon. Harder to visualize quiet days with their heads bent together and their secrets spilling softly to nourish the ground underneath them.

 

So he's afraid he'll have to hold his nose and jump right in.

 

“You forgot, didn't you? Anko is dead. Yahiko is dead. Konan is dead. They all died the night that we found you, killed by your friends.”

 

Sasuke had forgotten. Like a fool, it slipped his mind that Karin did kill three of their own that night. Shit.

 

“We've all done things we regret, and yeah, I know you've hurt people in the past. It's wrong, but they were nameless, faceless to me. So I can look past it and I know that's not who you really are. If that makes me shallow or hypocritical, fine, but I can't bring those three in because the others know that, too. They haven't forgiven or forgotten and I won't make them.”

 

Sasuke doesn't speak for a long moment, unsure what to say. Naruto is right about the loss of comrades and the friction that would no doubt arise because of it. There's no amount of talking or negotiating that could smooth over such wounds, half-healed as they are. Still, a small part of him argues that maybe it could still work, even as the larger part know that it wouldn't.

 

“Understandable.” He concedes, energy on dangerously low reserves. They've settled nothing; matters such as these won't be smoothed over cleanly with platitudes or passive acceptance. But this may be all he can do at the moment. He may have to sit on these few lumps in the hope of flattening out the rest.

 

Sasuke’s willing to let it go for the night so he can get some sleep. He doesn't feel like this improved anything between them. In fact, it may have worsened it. They didn’t say anything they truly wanted to say and Sasuke’s too tired, too choked on those words to possibly throw them across the room now.

 

“And what of me?” Naruto echoes him out of the blue, eyes holding Sasuke at gunpoint. “If you're a monster, am I not, too?”

 

Naruto’s always had boundless amounts of energy. Of course he's able to press on despite the heavy darkness outside and Sasuke’s heavy lids in here.

 

“Why ask me that?” Sasuke protests. “You're not.”

 

Naruto chuckles. “Only in your mind, because you think the best of me.” He says calmly. Sasuke doesn't like the sound of that, like the only good version of Naruto left exists only to him. That isn't true. There are people right outside who can attest to his character.

 

“I don't understand.” Sasuke admits. Naruto shrugs, eyes strange and resigned.

 

“I've done terrible things as well. I've killed innocents, I've lied, stolen, did plenty of shit I shouldn't have.” Naruto looks off, considering. “Hell, I even left Shino for dead, if we're being honest.”

 

“What?” Sasuke asks, a little breathless. He doesn't like this line of conversation. He hasn't heard of this, absent from the list of secrets Naruto’s whispered to him while they're alone.

 

Naruto’s face is careful blank as he speaks, revealing nothing. “Choji was already dead, and Shino and I had been isolated from everyone else. We were cornered and outnumbered. He was hurt, not badly, but enough. He told me to leave him.”

 

“That's not—” Sasuke begins to argue. That's not the same. There are sacrifices that have to be made on the battlefield. Hell, Sasuke nearly laid down his life before for a commanding officer. It's in the hierarchy, and it doesn't make sense for the captain to go down, lest the whole ship sink.  That doesn't make him a monster.

 

“It is.” Naruto counters. “I easily could have saved him, but I knew I'd be risking myself in the process. I didn't want to do that. I didn't want him to die, but I didn't want to save him, either. He was my friend and I purposely left him there. So, that's why I asked you: what of me?”

 

He doesn't hesitate with his answer, knowing that's what Naruto expects.

 

“You're the leader, Naruto. This whole outfit would fall apart without you. You needed to survive in that moment to make it where we are now. I won't vilify you for that.”

 

Naruto grins wide, but it's predatory instead of happy. Sasuke sees the loose screw in that moment, one that he's sure rattles around in his own head as well. It's like a reflection; the insanity that this wild world has wrought, the disconnection from their morals and their hearts. He sees it in Naruto just like he sees it in himself. It is not as ugly as he thought, all things considered.

 

“See? I'm ruthless, calculating, brutal, angry. Everyone says so. Even Kiba looks at me like I'm not all the way there anymore. All of them whisper; if you haven't heard, you aren't listening well enough.” Naruto says nonchalantly, like the words don’t haunt him in the dead of night. His eyes are positively golden in the dying light.  “But despite all that, to you I'm just Naruto, aren't I?”

 

He is.

 

Sasuke is blind and dumb and love-struck and hypocritical.

 

But he is.

 

“And to me, you're just Sasuke. Do you understand?”

 

He does. At least, he thinks so.

 

“So everything we've done is fine, as long as the two of us are willing to look past it?” Sasuke counters. It's not as simple as that, but he's willing to water it down for the sake of his argument.

 

“No. Of course not.” Naruto says, rolling his eyes. “Our sins are our own. We'll have to answer for them when this is all said and done. What I’m saying is that we're the same. Anything you are, I am. So, whatever it is you believe about yourself I fully understand. I've been there and I've done that. I know what it's like.”

 

Naruto finally stands and walks over to him. Sasuke stands perfectly still, unsure why he feels the need to do so.

 

Naruto smiles sadly, gripping his forearm and looking up into Sasuke’s eyes.

 

“I’m fully aware that we're both fucked up,” He whispers, a hair’s breadth from Sasuke’s lips. “By all means hold me accountable, but don't pull away from me. I don’t want anything to come between us, least of my own stupidity. But if you can’t accept that, I understand.”

 

Sasuke looks at him, searching his eyes as Naruto searches his. Sasuke is a little surprised at the admission. He had been unintentionally pulling back into his shell at the other man’s betrayal. Naruto had admitted before that he thought Sasuke had retreated for good. He sees it now, that uncharacteristic display of fear that slipped through his cracks. He must think that Sasuke sees less in him, that he can't forgive him, that maybe they're irreparably damaged before they've truly began.

 

Never.

 

“I’m still angry.” Sasuke admits, getting swept away in the rich blue gaze. “But I'm not going anywhere.”

 

“I know.” He murmurs. “I’ll beg for forgiveness for the rest of my life if I have to. I shouldn’t keep secrets from you.”

 

“You don't have to do that. I don't want you to beg and you don't have to tell me everything if you don't want to, but if it relates to me I want to know, alright?”

 

“That's fair.” He replies. Naruto steps further into his space, looping his arms around his back and settling his head of Sasuke’s shoulder. Sasuke rattles out a contented sigh, overjoyed to have him close again as he hugs him back, even if there's still so much to iron out between them.

 

That's what the logical part of him says, the part that's a seasoned veteran at maneuvering and outside relations.  The emotional part of him—the part of him that’s in charge of their friendship and their love—is contented with just this. That part doesn't want to delve deeper, seeing this as just another one of their old spats that works itself out after they say sorry, all ire forgotten. That's still how it works, isn't it? They're fine.

 

—Pushover,

You'll let him do

Whatever he wants

Won't you?

 

Still, he's feeling a bit triumphant, if not petty. Once he overlooked his hurt, in came the anger at the other secret holder being Gaara, of all people. He doesn't like that. If any duo should hold onto potentially life shattering information, it should be the two of them, not anyone else.

 

“I’d also rather you not keep secrets with Gaara, if I'm honest.”

 

Naruto pulls back from his shoulder, looking a tad amused despite himself.

 

“Because you hate him?” He questions like he doesn't already know.

 

“And he hates me right back, if you haven’t noticed. I understand that he's been your confidant for years, but —” This is selfish of him, and slightly manipulative, but he's going to do it anyway. “I won't be second best.”

 

It's not like Naruto hasn't been manipulating him this entire time, either. It’s less ignoring their toxicity and more embracing it.

 

“You aren't.” Naruto assures, fingers digging into his arms. “It was only because he knew of the clones and because Kankuro is one. It wasn't my secret to tell. Still, you're right. I need to set some new...boundaries for myself. I'm sorry.”

 

“We haven't said that nearly enough tonight, have we?” Sasuke murmurs.

 

“We haven't.” Naruto agrees, sighing into his shoulder. They embrace for a long while breathing in each other scent and taking comfort in each other’s warmth.

 

“Don't disappear like that again,” Naruto says eventually, voice muffled in his shoulder. “I was really fucking worried. When you didn't come back after the fourth day, I —” He trails off, releasing his hold on Sasuke’s back to loop his arms around his neck.

 

“I know. Forgive me for not sending word.”

 

Naruto doesn't say anything. He squeezes harder, letting out a rough breath at the wave of emotion that overtakes him.

 

“It's okay.” He says finally, softly breathing the words into Sasuke’s ear. He shudders. Too close, they're too close and Sasuke’s still so depraved, itching to touch his secret places since he's held back for so long. This isn't the time to think such thoughts since he refuses to work out all of their problems with sex. Though, the idea is quite appealing.

 

Naruto seems to agree, pulling back slowly and clearing his throat. He looks up at Sasuke through his lashes, clearly wanting, but conflict dances in his eyes and he hesitates. Instead of pouncing like they're oft to do, he settles on a semi-chaste kiss. It still has Sasuke’s toes curling in his boots regardless.

 

“We're going to ruin each other, aren't we?” Naruto whispers once he's able to pull away. Sasuke chases him, pulling their bodies together for comfort since he swears he's not aiming for more.

 

“Undoubtedly.” He replied immediately, Watching Naruto’s throat as he swallows. “It's already too late for me, I think.”

 

Naruto smiles, eye's lowering. “Same. C’mon. You're tired. Let's go to bed.”

 

Sasuke couldn't agree more. He's barely up right as it is.

 

When he lays down, He's out like a light in mere moments. He isn't sure how much time has passed, but it seems to be the darkest time of night when he wakes again. He returned in the early evening so it must be nearing morning at this point. He has no idea, since the only functional clock in the farmhouse is in the living room and he isn't about to go out there and check.

 

He blinks around the room, not sure what woke him up from an otherwise deep sleep. Ah, it must be the absence of a head on his shoulder or a body tucked under his arm. He looks over to see why Naruto is so far away.

 

Naruto, for some reason, is still awake. He’s faced away from him, towards the wall. Sasuke can tell by the unevenness of his breathing, too unsteady to be affected by sleep.

 

“You still up?” Sasuke mumbles, rolling off of his back to face Naruto’s. “C’mere.” Naruto doesn't answer him for a moment, shifting slightly on the bed.

 

“Did we make up?” Naruto asks suddenly, so long after Sasuke’s original question that he almost fell asleep again.

 

“I think so?” Sasuke replies, a bit disoriented. “It felt like we did.”

 

Naruto sighs in what sounds like relief, rolling over to face him. He leans in and pecks Sasuke on the cheek before he pulls the covers up to his neck.

 

“Okay. Good. Goodnight, then.” He says, almost cheerily, settling down into his pillow.

 

Wait, what?

 

“Did you stay up just so you could ask me that?” Sasuke questions. It must have been weighing on him heavily, so much that he needed confirmation before he could attempt to sleep. Ah. How cute.

 

 _"Goodnight_ , Sasuke.” Naruto says pointedly, not opening his eyes.

 

Sasuke chuckles, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. Naruto smiles softly, still without opening his eyes. He does scoot a little closer, however.

 

Ruining each other indeed, Sasuke thinks, before sleep takes him once more.

 

 


	8. Red

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got so long that I had to split it in two! Prepare yourselves!

* * *

 

 **Eight** ,

**Part I**

 

_Do you understand that_

_We will never be the same again?_

_The future’s in our hands,_

_And we will never be the same again._

— Things We Lost in the Fire,

Bastille.

* * *

 

 

**A.**

 

The chill of the brick wall seeps through his jacket as his back presses against it. Sasuke looks around the corner with a slight pivot of his body, not surprised that the coast is clear but wary of the early morning silence anyway.

 

The air yard only has a few patrolling guards, mostly roaming around the front side. His team is coming in from the east, aiming for an oddly painted ship and their contact that sits inside it.

 

“Are you all sure about this?” Sakura asks for the millionth time tonight —or this morning, since it's nearly four. She's restless and upset; they all are, since no one's here to sleep. Betrayed too, in the loosest of senses, because she's getting carted off to safety. Back to Earth with Lee for the sake of their child.

 

Sakura desperately wants to come along, to fight, but the ever present wobble in her steps slows her movements. She's too far along now and no one here could live with themselves if something happened to her.

 

Naruto’s lips thin, no doubt biting down some irritable retort at her repeated questioning. Sasuke can tell that he's trying to be patient and not order her around like the situation calls for. She deserves to have a say in the proceedings since she is just as much a part of this as everyone else, but there's a limit to how reckless they can be. More than enough lives are on the line. There's no turning back from here.

 

She simply cannot stay.

 

“I can still—” She tries. Kiba and Shikamaru sigh from her other side, but say nothing. They've heard it for days. Weeks. No matter what she believes, they're going to ignore it.

 

“We have to.” Naruto replies resolutely, for the millionth time. Then, quieter, only to her: “I won't let it happen again.”

 

Sasuke’s right beside him, so he hears it anyway. He swallows thickly, eyes still trained on empty expanse in front of him.

 

Its risk enough being here. For once they had to trapeze through a densely populated city instead of on the fringes of civilization. Naruto told him the name of this bustling town but he's already forgotten it; he rarely pays attention to human settlements unless he absolutely has to. He has to admit that this place is fairly advanced, much like the Capitol on Earth.

 

Part of him wishes that they weren't outlaws since there's actual entertainment here, as well as restaurants and paved roads. Not all of Delta-1 is overgrown wilderness, even though it feels that way since they've had to crawl through its trenches for months. But that's not what they're here for.

 

Shikamaru pulled some strings to get in touch with a captain of a beat up old vessel ship who apparently “owes a favor.” No one asks what it is and Shikamaru doesn't offer, so that's that. All they know is that he's leaving early in the morning, today only, and he's willing to take Sakura and Lee back to Earth under the cover of darkness.

 

But they're wanted criminals, so it won't be that easy. They spent days falsifying boarding passes—in case there's a surprise inspection upon landing or a particularly observant and well informed guard. Sakura cut her hair short and dyed it. Lee buzzed his and donned fake glasses.

 

It should be enough, since Sakura’s visibly pregnant and that just doesn't happen for Synths as far as the humans are concerned. They're Sixes on top of that, made to be able to blend in seamlessly with humans. It should be enough. Sasuke desperately hopes that it is.

 

“It's okay, Sakura,” Lee says quietly. “We're all going to see each other again. I know it.”

 

Too subdued for the normally jovial man. Sasuke hates how that makes him feel in that moment, like they all know this is the end one way or another. He hears Kiba’s sharp intake of breath and feels Naruto sag beside him.

 

Bad thoughts. Bad, bad thoughts. He refuses to think them.

 

“We will.” Sasuke says, trying to defuse the bomb they were all so desperately trying to keep from going off. “This isn't goodbye.”

 

Sakura’s lip trembles in the darkness and she nods.

 

“Okay.” She breathes. He's sure she doesn't believe him.

 

He doesn't, either.

 

“You all done over there?” The man that Shikamaru knows grumbles around his cigarette, voice rough from years of use. Human then, since Synths don't take that kind of damage from nicotine or alcohol. “We don't have all night.”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Shikamaru calls back, annoyed. “They're coming.”

 

“Where will you guys go?” Kiba asks, also strangely subdued. He holds his hand up in warning right as Lee goes to speak. “Don't say exactly where. You know, just in case.”

 

Lee doesn't have to think on his answering, replying: “West, probably. Near the coast. We want to live in a little house on the beach.”

 

“Somewhere sunny and warm.” Sakura says softly, looking at Naruto. They share a look, something Sasuke can't grasp, and he wonders if that was a dream they had shared for their own little one, once upon a time.

 

He's not going to ask.

 

Some things are better left unsaid.

 

But from the look on his face Sasuke would have to say so, since Naruto looks absolutely wrecked for a moment before his face schools back into steely resolve.

 

“And you'll have it.” He says, nodding. “Now go.”

 

“Okay.” Sakura breathes again, looking at each one of them one by one. She presses a soft kiss to everyone's cheek as she moves down the line. They already said their goodbyes as a group back at the base hours ago, but he knew she wouldn't be able to walk away without doing it again once they were here.

 

“See you later?” She asks hopefully, mouth lifting in a sad, lopsided grin.

 

“You know it!” Kiba says with enthusiastic finger guns. Shikamaru chuckles while Naruto says: “Of course.”

 

Sasuke can't fix his mouth to move, so he settles on a nod, voice too choked up with sadness and hope and dread and happiness. Too much at once that he can't categorize. He wants them to be free. He wants them to be happy.

 

He’s glad they won’t die here, like the rest of them will.

 

But he can't say that, so he nods instead.

 

Sakura waves as she boards, Lee on her heels. They're smiling, even as it hurts, and that's more than enough. They won't be truly safe unless the rest of them finish what they started, so that gives them renewed determination and freshly squared shoulders as they watch them off.

 

The human, Asuma, shakes Shikamaru's hand before he goes, giving him a gentle pat on his shoulder.

 

“I'll do what I can for them.” He promises gravely to Shikamaru, like he's truly giving an oath. He turns to Naruto, regarding him with a look of respect they rarely see from humans. It’s strangely comforting. “Always knew there was more to it than that for you lot. Not just the sum of your parts. Give ‘em hell, alright?”

 

“Thanks.” Naruto replies as the sun starts to rise around them. The little specks of gold set his eyes alright. “We will.”

 ...

 

The day arrives.

 

It rolls in after a rumbling rain, fresh dew on the ground and a buzz in the air left over from the strikes of lightning.

 

It's the only thing up here that's simulated, the weather. Its only purpose to fill the lakes and water the grass, to make the humans here feel like they've never left home. Even though most of them now weren't born on Earth and have never see it.

 

It's simulated, so Sasuke tries not to take such gusty winds and black weather as a sign of foreshadowing for the day to come.

 

He hides another small knife in his boot. The third he’s slipped there in his excitement. It feels like he'll have to use them today, somehow, so he can never be too ready.

 

No one's said a word all morning.

 

Everyone immediately rose at first light and started to prepare; strapping grenades to their belts and tightening the laces of their boots.

 

It's stifled in here, too serious and grim. Sasuke feels like he might explode from the weight they carry, from the finality of the harsh-set lines that crease all of their faces. He feels excitement too at this point of no return, fingers itchy and twitching. This is happening. This is real. They're going to do it.

 

Or die trying.

 

“Someone please say something.” Sora mutters from his spot on the wall. He's leaning with his arms crossed, looking back and forth between their stone faces, brow creased in worry. “You're all kinda freaking me out.”

 

It's Sai who takes pity on him first, moving to throw a companionable arm around his shoulder. “Sorry, sorry. All the big kids are killing the mood.” He says cheerily, even though there's a firm edge in his eyes and a stiffness in his shoulders that's been present for days.

 

They're all wound tight with expectation. With thoughts of victory even if it seems farfetched. They did not come this far to lose or fail. One way or another, they'll be free.

 

“I'm not worried about that,” Sora protests. “I just, I don't know, should we say something meaningful before we go? You know, in case…” He trails off, unsure of how to phrase the words they already know.

 

Sasuke regrets that they were not being able to convince him to go with Lee and Sakura. He's still young and full of life that he's barely lived. He shouldn't be here like this, but at the same time he should. It's his future too and the whole point of this is to give hope to their kind. Those that came before and those that will come after.

 

Still, it reminds Sasuke of when he was young and green, of the horrors he saw long before he was ready for them, and how much it’s affected him. He doesn't want that for Sora. He doesn't want that for anyone, if he's honest, but especially not for the child he's become fond of in the months he's been here.

 

“No.” Gaara grunts, not looking up as he assembles his gun. “You should have made your peace a long time ago.”

 

“Give him a break.” Ino grumbles as she ties up her hair. Tenten sharpens a knife beside her, nodding in agreement. “Not everything has to be gloom and doom. Let him say something nice if he wants to, jeez.”

 

Temari rolls her eyes as she straps on a bulletproof vest, rolling her shoulders to test her mobility. Most of the armor they got from the armory is heavy. High-tech, but heavy. Sasuke didn't really want to wear it, so in his spare time between runs and their targets, he went about fixing his old morph suit. Its lighter, tailored just for him, so he likes it better.

 

Besides, he’s a part of the covert entry team, so he needs to be less noticeable and quicker. His helmet was shot to hell, though, but it wasn't like he planned on wearing it. He doesn't want to look like a Hunter, doesn't want to _feel_ like one either today, but he has to admit that the government issued suit is top-fucking-notch. He was blown up in it and after a few tweaks it still works. Doesn't get better than that.

 

There’s another reason why his suit could be necessary today, but he tries not to dwell on it.

 

Naruto stands near a window, gazing out to the grasslands around them. He says nothing, hands clasped behind his back and foot tapping as he waits for everyone to be ready. He was up early, earlier than Sasuke and everyone else. It makes sense; He's been waiting for this day longer than any of them. Patient. Ready. Sasuke’s not sure if he even got any sleep last night or if he stayed up in restless anticipation.

 

The suit he wears is different from the rest; standard black, like the others, but with a long orange stripe curving over the left shoulder all the way down his side and leg, the rest disappearing into his heavy leather combat boots. It's thinner like Sasuke’s, so he can move and run and fight like they're no doubt going to do to the best of his ability.  The look suits him very well, and Sasuke tries to ignore how well the tight nanomite-spandex outfit outlines his body.

 

He thinks he's failing based on the smirk Kiba sends him when he catches Sasuke looking.

 

“I'm proud of all of you.” Naruto says without turning around. An expectant hush falls over the room. “No matter what happens today, know that I'm proud and impressed and that I love each and every one of you. We've come so far and we made it. We’re going to make it out, too. I truly believe that we will. So, thank you. For everything.”

 

“Aww, chief!” Sai cries while holding his arms out for a hug. “I love you, too!” There's a round of chuckles as Naruto pushes him away huffily with a stiff arm, lightening the mood.

 

Sasuke cleats his throat, causing eyes to swing to him. For once he doesn't flinch away from them, looking at everyone head on so he can speak his piece. He's tired of having regrets for the things he should have said so this time he's not going to let the moment pass.

 

His voice isn't as steady as he would like it to be, but he's sure everyone relates to the why of it. “I just wanted to say that it's been a pleasure. I'm glad I came here. I'm glad I got to see you all again and meet everyone who didn't already know me. Even if you aren't glad you met me—” He says, sending a pointed look to Gaara, “I'm still glad that we all got the chance to know each other.”

 

He must be caught up in the mood because Gaara just laughs and rolls his eyes as everyone else chuckles at Sasuke’s declaration.

 

“You're not so bad, I guess.” Gaara says with a shrug. Sasuke clicks his tongue and snorts.

 

“You aren't either.” He replies. Naruto turns to look at him, eyes warm and glowing, giving Sasuke a soft smile that makes his heart beat faster.

 

“Chuckles is getting in on this, too?” Sai says in mock surprise. He actually seems happy, even if he's teasing. “I'm really feeling the love you guys. Bring it in!” Unlike Naruto, Sasuke relents and allows his hug since, even as they say kind things to each other and joke around, this truly could be the last time they have this opportunity.

 

Naruto seems to realize this, because he taps Sai on the shoulder after he's let go of Sasuke and offers up an embrace which the other man freely takes. This sets off a chain reaction as everyone gets caught in the swell at the same moment, rising from their seats to dole out hugs and niceties. It goes on for some time, until they've made sure to touch each member with words and hands and they tire of it, getting back to the task at hand.

 

“Alright, okay, we gotta go!” Kiba calls out, embarrassed by the open affection swirling around. “It's weird to see some of you get sentimental. I don't know if I like it.”

 

“Oh, shut up.” Tenten protests. “Yes you do.”

 

He can't argue that so he shuts his mouth.

 

“Well I don't.” Kankuro mutters, grabbing his gun and looking like he's ready to head out. He was well part of the fray a moment ago too but he’ll act like he wasn’t.

 

Regardless, they all sober, reaching for their weapons and steeling themselves once more. “Let's get this done.”

 

“What of this place?” Temari asks quietly. Naruto raises an eyebrow, urging her to continue. “Will we come back here after?”

 

Everyone looks pensive like they hadn't thought of that. Because they hadn't.

 

(The cots in the room upstairs, pushed together for warmth, the kitchen table they sat around to eat beside the candlelight, the little effects they have that littered the floor. The small garden that Kimimaro tended with love and care.)

 

Somewhere along the way, the old, beaten up farmhouse started to feel like home.

 

It's not. They don't have one, lost and running like they are. But they fooled themselves all the same.

 

Sasuke doesn't care about that. It may not be home, but it did house a family.

 

“We already have everything that's important with us.” Naruto says unblinking. “So burn it. Leave nothing behind.”

 

Sasuke knew he'd say that. The others nod in agreement.

 

“Alright.” Temari confirms.

 

“Goodbye, little plants.” Kimimaro says solemnly. Sasuke pats his arm and Kimimaro manages a smile for him. He's been quiet for the past few days, wrought with worry. Sasuke hopes above all else that he'll make it out of this.

 

“We ready?” Shikamaru asks gently, like if he speaks too loud they'll all break.

 

But they don't

And they won't.

 

Murmurs of agreement, and then they're off.

 

A plume, rising black and orange into the sky like a phoenix as they march on to destiny. Sasuke would have liked to stay and watch as the house crumbled into nothing but they don't have that kind of time.

 

Naruto’s hand finds his in the throng of bodies, squeezing. He doesn't have to say since Sasuke already knows.

 

It's where Naruto used to live, after all, when he was still a farmer. When he did his duty and toiled away, before light came over the horizon. Before he broke free of that mold to become what he is now, what they all are. The old fields dried up from neglect, the master bedroom absent of its owner.

 

That owner left one day and...never returned. Naruto’s burning more than just a “happened upon” hideout—

 

But he doesn't have to say, since Sasuke already knows.

 

Free, Sasuke thinks as the wood crackles behind them. No matter what, they're free.

* * *

 

**B.**

 

The political summit has security on high. Leaders from the biggest settlements will be in attendance. Orion, Deimos-4, Lennox, and Alpha Centauri. Sasuke wonders what the meeting could be about since get-togethers like this are few and far between.

 

The Powers That Be chose to rule their Station-States independently, each a separate government with their own sets of rules and laws to abide by. The most they share is trade and some news that trickles down slowly to Earth and beyond. It must be big if they're all willing to be in the same room together.

 

His team accounted for this heightened security and they plan to use it to their advantage. The meeting is on the third floor and that's where most of the guards will be. The records are on the eighth floor.

 

There's a hallway on the southwest side that's fallen into disrepair, cordoned off and condemned. Half the stairs are rotten and broken, but it's their best bet. Karin suggested it, after she found old blueprints once they made the move and were stationed here.

 

The access terminal was shut down on that door ages ago—the entryway that leads outside covered over by copious layers of paint and brick—but Shikamaru expertly hacked it and they have their methods of breaking in.

 

It can only be opened from inside, though, so their team of inside-men will be in charge of that. Since the place is crawling with soldiers, it won't be noticed immediately if three or four of them aren't front and center.

 

The majority of the team will stay in and around that stairwell to secure it, taking down humans if they have to. The point is to keep alarm from being raised while the deep infiltration team gets what they need from the records room. No detours, no distractions. They get what they need and go.

 

Once they're in, Shikamaru, Naruto and Sasuke will go through the vents to spill out right above the records room. From their calculations the eighth floor should be sparsely populated, since it's the research hall and most employees have been removed due to the nature of the day. Still, it seems too risky to blatantly walk through the halls. The vents are accessible through an entrance in the stairwell hall, starting on the third floor.

 

This is the only chance they have, while everyone's distracted by the Leaders meeting. They won't get the chance again and even if it's more dangerous to do this with twice as many guards as usual, they have to.

 

“Ready?” Naruto asks. Everyone is in position outside, waiting on bated breath. Sasuke nods even though Naruto’s right beside him. They share a look, one that says all the things they could and all the things they couldn't, and then—

 

“On your cue.” Juugo rumbles quietly over the comm. This will have to be quick, precise. No room for error. It's happening.

 

It's happening.

 

“Go.” Naruto commands.

 

Kiba and Gaara move first. Two of the strongest, physically. The plan to unearth the door is simple: Kiba runs straight at it, soaring with a flying kick at nearly 100% of his capacity. His wild grin is infectious and the use of so much power leaves an electric blue chemical trail that streaks out of the corner of his eyes and underneath his feet.

 

It's like watching in slow motion — He nearly flies, careening towards his target like it's personally offended him, muscles rippling as he grits his teeth for impact.

 

The brick groans and shatters, revealing a heavy oak door. Kiba starts furiously dragging away any pieces left, until it's fully uncovered.

 

There's three men on a small alcove high up above on the sixth floor. Model 4’s, from the looks of it. The force of Kiba’s kick rattles up the side of the building, shaking their balcony hard enough to pitch them overboard. They fall to the ground with a sickening thud.

 

Gaara watches them twitch, blood leaking from their noses. Broken. Inside, probably. Something shaken loose in their wiring and subtle cracks in their bones. They are not harmless though: no Synth is down until you put them down. They could still call for help or raise an alarm if given time, so Gaara won't afford them that. He shoots them squarely between the eyes.

 

This is no time for mercy.

 

Sai and Kimimaro move next, dragging the dead to be hidden deep in the surrounding foliage. It takes Kiba no time flat to pull away the rest of broken brick, revealing the rest of the door.

 

They pause, making sure no one else heard the rumbling they caused. They shouldn't have; there are tanks roaming around the front, grumbling low as they kick up gravel and pitch unevenly over the bumpy terrain. Soldiers march in formation, their heavy footfalls pulsing like a drumbeat as they look anywhere but south for an unknown threat. It'd be hard to hear anything over those sounds.

 

That's what they were hoping for.

 

When nothing moves, save for the trees and the wind, Kiba knocks once as a signal.

 

Shikamaru jams a button on his handheld terminal, reactivating the keycard reader.

 

Inside, Juugo presses his hand against it, using the chip embedded in his palm to override its prompt for verification. It flicks green and he throws the door open, ushering everyone inside. They take off from their hiding places, spilling into the cramped hallway like a flood.

 

Easy.

 

“Alright,” Naruto mutters approvingly. The door closes and darkness settles in, save for the few beams of the sunshine through the small stone windows up above. “Secure the area and stay sharp. This hall’s abandoned but we don't know if anyone heard us and we need to keep a clear route back out. Spread out and don't go out on the main floor unless you absolutely have to, got it?” There's a flurry of nods and then they’re moving.

 

The staircase is winding and open, but half dilapidated as they knew it would be. Some of the stairs are missing and they'll have to jump to get to higher areas, but it shouldn't be a problem.

 

Kiba stays posted by the door to the first floor, a little worn from using so much power. His grin is still firmly in place and the fight’s not left him. He’ll be fine. Temari and Tenten for the second, a team of hard-hitting tough girls that could outmatch any man here or otherwise. Gaara and Kankuro follow them up to the third floor, brothers standing watch over the door that will spill out into the main hall.

 

Sora and Kimimaro guard the entrance to the fourth, both eager to prove themselves, while the flirts Ino and Sai watch the fifth. A pensive Karin and guarded Juugo focus on the sixth and an irritable Suigetsu for the seventh. Taka stands by the eighth, silent and brooding. He seems to be in a mood but Sasuke doesn't have time to ask him why.

 

It's probably because the others were sufficiently freaked out by him when they rendezvoused earlier, keeping a certain distance from him. Naruto had given Taka a look of absolute disdain and Sasuke knows that hurt his feelings. He is still Sasuke, after all.

 

Gotcha!” Kiba nearly shouts over the comm, positively buzzing.

 

“We won't let you down.” Kankuro murmurs at the same time.

 

“Be quick about it, yeah?” Suigetsu grunts, probably sickened by the fact that he's still being left out of the direct action. Sasuke smirks despite himself. “Nobody's stirring yet but don’t go taking your sweet time or stand around with your thumb up your ass. I'm talking to you, Sasuke.”

 

Sasuke snorts, leaning out over the railing so he can flick Suigetsu off above him. He gets a grin and rude hand gesture right back.

 

Naruto raises an eyebrow at their childish behavior.

 

“He's charming.” Naruto comments dryly. Sasuke rolls his eyes, hopping so he can reach the vent after Shikamaru climbs inside.

 

“If that's what you want to call it.” He retorts, humor coloring his tone.

 

Even as they shimmy through the tight space, Shikamaru can still read the blueprints to guide them to their destination. They try to be a silent as possible, but it's hard for their knees not to knock against the metal walls or stop the creaking as they climb higher. Sasuke hopes no one will hear and shoot them as they crawl along.

 

After what feels like an eternity of sideways and upward climbing, Shikamaru stops short on what Sasuke assumes to be the eighth floor records room, almost causing a pile up behind him. Sasuke lost track of where they were almost as soon as they entered.

 

“What?” Naruto whispers furiously, rubbing at his head from where it bumped on the ceiling. “What is it?”

 

“Someone's in there.” Shikamaru whispers back in a frequency only they can hear, frozen as he looks downward through the vent grate.

 

Shit.

 

“Dammit.” Naruto swears. “Where is he? Do you think he heard?”

 

“No. He's by one of terminals. He hasn't looked up.”

 

“What does he look like? A guard? Someone else?”

 

“I can't tell.”

 

Sasuke understands the other man's hesitation. They weren't expecting anyone to be here and they have no idea of his identity or skill level. It doesn't matter though, since they have a job to do. He's ready to suggest that they throw caution to the wind and just _jump_ down there and take the guy out, but it doesn't get that far.

 

Shikamaru seizes up again in absolute shock, recoiling backwards.

 

“What?” Naruto demands, notes of panic coloring his tone. “What happened?”

 

Shikamaru doesn't speak for a moment, long enough for them to hear a door close, before he lets out a shuddered breath.

 

“Fuck,” He breathes. “That scared me.”

 

“What?” Naruto asks again, frustrated since he couldn't see the proceedings from behind Sasuke.

 

“He walked right under us and then looked directly at me. He gave this weird smile and then put his finger to his lips, then he left. His eyes…” He trails off, shaking his head.

 

“What the hell?” Naruto mumbles. “You think he's gone?”

 

“Probably.”

 

They don't have time to mull over it. Strange men can't stop them now. Still, Sasuke doesn't like this. Something is wrong.

 

“Alright. Let's go then.”

 

Shikamaru kicks the grate out, landing gracefully on top of it. He rushes to the door and hazards a look out of it, giving them a thumbs up when the coast is clear.

 

Sasuke drops down first and Naruto follows, standing and brushing imaginary dirt off of his suit. He takes a look around in amazement.

 

Hundreds of silver button-sized data sticks dot the walls, accented by golden rings, blinking back at him like fireflies. He doesn't know where to start here. There's much more than he thought.

 

Each stick contains eons of information. Knowledge that can sink ships, burn bridges, flood the homes of their enemies—taking all the crinkled old pictures and carefully collected keepsakes along as it flows through the windows and pushes at the doors.

 

“Shit.” Shikamaru says, summing it up perfectly with a low whistle.

 

“Yeah.” Naruto mumbles, eyes slightly wide. They can do more than get their justice here. There are deeper still things hidden amongst all these files.

 

“Should we just…?” Sasuke asks, unsure of what he really means. They brought sacks with them, thinking there may be papers from the bygone era still floating about. Some of the older humans continue to book keep even after all the advancements in technology and the years that have traced over the lines that shaped the methods of old.

 

They figured they would have to leave some behind, carefully selecting what they need for the biggest impact. It would all come out regardless, so it didn't seem like such a terrible sacrifice to make. Little did they know they won't have to leave much at all.

 

“Grab anything you can. Whatever you can fit.” Naruto declares, excitement creeping into his tone for the first time in a long time. Sasuke feels it too, the swelling sweep of joy for a mission almost accomplished. There's so fucking much. It will take them ages to decode it all and release it to the public, but it will be worth it.

 

Sasuke pulls wildly at the great silver wall, flinging them all in his bag. He feels a grin building but smothers it. This isn't the time to lose himself to wild abandon. They need to stay focused.

 

But this is what they came for. This is their promised goldmine. This is all they hoped and fought for. In the end he cannot help himself, sharing a look with Naruto as they stuff their bags with their bounty.

 

His blue eyes are bright, shining against the backdrop of silver and gold. Sasuke’s breath catches in that moment as they share twin smiles of joy.

 

Shikamaru sits at one of the terminals, popping in one of the dials to have a look at it. Surprisingly, it isn't locked behind a data wall. Instead the information pours out like ink upon the page. He scans it quickly for relevance, breath catching on whatever he's read.

 

Naruto notices first, hand hovering over the nearest dial in hesitation. Shikamaru’s silence is unnerving so Sasuke can't help but be drawn to it as well.

 

“What?” Both of them questions at the same time.

 

“Come look.” Shikamaru replies quietly, like he's too rattled to speak any louder. Sasuke and Naruto share a concerned look before stopping their assault on the input wall to make their way over to him. His bag jostles as he walks, heavy. It'll be too heavy to make it back through the vents like this again. They'll have to make it to the hallway to escape, which may be a problem. He files that thought away for later, worrying more for the present.

 

Sasuke reads over one of Shikamaru’s shoulders while Naruto leans over the other. He scans slowly before he realizes that he doesn't understand what he's seeing, so he goes over it again. Finally his mind allows for clarity, jarring him all at once since he understands.

 

— _Oh._

 

It started with a man in a tower, lamenting a lost dream.

 

Creation.

 

A failed engineer and visionary, vibrating on a frequency many couldn’t feel. He wanted...more. There was dormant strength hiding under human skin, locked up tight by veins and sinew, and with a few...tweaks, he sought to bring it out. Built, not born. Enhancement, instead of evolution, until what stood in front of him was less and less human as time wore on. Each model—No, no, each _class_ that graduated his academy got closer to his image of God.

The First were fleeting.

The Second were smarter, analytical, and empathetic. 

The Third were angry and quickly destroyed.

The Fourth created scholars and masters of the battlefield in equal measure.

But it wasn't enough. They were inorganic, insincere. Ultimately they were machines, no matter how you looked at it. They couldn’t evolve the way humans could. The way humans _did_. Maybe, if given the time, but there were deadlines to meet, shareholders to please, new lands to be explored, so that man in that tower had to think of something to stay ahead. He had to breathe new life into his stagnant dreams and unite the world to his cause.

 

So the fifth were _volunteers._

 

Human, originally. Born, not built. They had mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers and uncles and cousins _and_ —

 

They were told that their enhancements would give them newfound freedom. A new race, of human-born machines. All the perks of an appliance with the mind of a man. They tapped into that hidden strength and their bodies could withstand much. They wouldn't get sick and they could fight their way out of anything. But, most importantly, they could still call themselves human.

 

What better way to play God than to fiddle with his creations?

 

This was an experiment of the physical and social kind. Humans would see their brothers and friends being made **better**. Stronger. Faster. Mighter. Maybe they would want the same. No human ever had to be weak again, if they all signed up to be perfected. That was the plan.

 

The Sixth were children.

 

Already born faster, stronger, and better, because of their parentage. A healthy predisposition for the chemicals and the tests woven into their DNA. Their metal parts added later in their youth. They were to be the bridge between man and machine, ushering the world into a new age. Those volunteers were told that their children would be revered, treated like normal kids living normal lives beside their un-augmented counterparts.

 

But it was not to be so.

 

The humans, up high in their own towers, had control of the earth and it's surrounded colonies. They did not want equality, they did not want to call those that underwent the test human. They did not want too many made that they couldn't control or a future they didn't have a hand in. They wanted slaves.

 

So they lied.

 

They claimed the Fifth and the Sixth to be built from scratch, just like all the others. All machine. Fancy gadgets to play with and dispose of when interest waned. They threatened the lives of those volunteers and the lives of their children, buried the proof, and forced those humans that gave themselves for a new world into a cruel life of servitude, devoid of all the rights of a human since the Powers that Be deemed them unworthy of the title.

 

The Fifth fell in line to protect the status quo or they died in disgrace. There was no in between.

 

So, the Sixth were children. Human children, with a few tweaks. But they were told that they were not.

 

— _Oh._

 

“Fuck.” Naruto says after a tense moment. “That's worse.”

 

Isn't it?

 

“So our parents…?” Shikamaru questions, turning towards them. His eyes are wild and he's clearly shaken. They knew some of this, but not all. There's clearly more here they needs exploring but…

 

 _Fuck_.

 

“Probably were some of the volunteers. They were human too.” Naruto finishes for him, swallowing thickly. “We were always fucking human, always.”

 

Sasuke doesn't know what to think. It was hard enough accepting that he was his mother's child before, but now he knows that she _chose_ this. He'd always thought her and his father to be Model Fours. Poised and Perfect.

 

But they weren't. They were human first, volunteers for a different future where every being—organic or otherwise—could live in harmony. They thought their children would have better, safer lives, outfitted with the means to protect themselves from the horrors of the universe. But all they ended up with was handfuls of lies and children that would be used just as they were.

 

He cannot imagine how they must have felt knowing that they doomed themselves and their children to a second class existence with no mean of escape. He can't possibly imagine.

 

“That's enough.” Shikamaru says, shuddering from the thoughts he had. He rises from his chair and pulls the stick out of the computer terminal. “We can look at the rest of this later. We need to go.”

 

“Yeah.” Naruto agrees, but his mind is clearly elsewhere. Sasuke feels the same; lost, confused, hurt. Such lengths gone to preserve this way of life at the cost of the humanity of many. So many people jailed and killed for wanting to be equal. So much heartache and pain when in the end they are all the same.

 

“We'll have to take the hall.” Sasuke says slowly, pulling out of his own thoughts. “We can't get back through like this. The stairwell shouldn't be too far.”

 

They could use any of the other stairwells, but even with the blueprints it's a gamble where those stairs spill out. It's probably best to use the one they gained entry with to make a hasty exit.

 

Naruto nods, throwing his bag over his shoulder. Shikamaru mirrors him, shouldering his own bag as they all stare at the closed door.

 

“I don't care if there's fifty men out there.” Naruto says roughly, eyes sharp and dangerous. He's angry at all of this, rightly so. So many fought and died for nothing, so many lost for seeking this same truth that they've found. What a fucking waste.

 

“We're getting out of here and we're going to spread this shit everywhere, you hear me?” He doesn't wait for either of their replies, charging outward towards the empty hall.

 

Sasuke catches his arm before he gets too far, tugging him back. Naruto whips around, ready to bite his head off, but Sasuke needs to keep him rational and calm.

 

“Stay with me, okay?” He says softly before Naruto can get a word out.

 

He doesn't mean physically.

 

Naruto’s jaw works and he freezes, blinking, before the tension in his body is receding and he sags like an old balloon. “I'm here.” He says tightly. Sasuke hazards a small smile and he isn't surprised when it's not returned.

 

Instead of charging they hug the wall, peeking out to make sure the coast is clear. The old abandoned hallway should be two right turns by Shikamaru’s calculations, since the records room they just left is on the north facing hall of the eighth floor. They need to get back south.

 

“Okay, let's go.” Naruto says, taking off into a full sprint down the hall. They're Synths, so even if a human were to walk out of one of the other rooms and see them, they wouldn't be able to react fast enough before the three of them made their escape.

 

— A Synth, Sasuke?

Can you call yourself that, still?

With all that you know?

 

“We're coming out.” Shikamaru announces over the comm. They haven't heard any updates from anyone down below so Sasuke assumes that everything is going to plan. “We've got what we need.”

 

“Fuck yeah!” Kiba shouts.

 

“Awesome!” Karin replies, smile in her voice.

 

“We always knew you would!” Tenten praises. “Now let's get the fuck out of here!”

 

It's infectious, their joy and sense of accomplishment. Sasuke feels confidence at the spring of his step, feeling ready for whatever comes next.

 

Or not, since its Gaara’s voice, gravely serious, that cuts through the sounds of excitement and revelry. “Something's happening,” He says, confusing them all. “I think there's someone else here—”

 

Static. The comm cuts out and Sasuke feels his chest seize, shock cutting his steps short until he's at a full stop.

 

Naruto presses the comm further in his ear to hear over the crackling. “Gaara?” He demands, voice colored with uncertainty. “Gaara? Answer me!” He tries.

 

Silence.

 

 _Fuck_.

 

“What floor were they on?” Shikamaru asks, hurried. Sasuke blanks, forgetful at the worst of times. “We need to get down there —”

 

They never get the chance.

 

Something rumbles, deep like an earthquake. Atlas is awakening, ready to turn the world upside down as he pitches it off his weary shoulders.

 

He hears it, like match being lit in a quiet room—a breathy _woosh_ that robs his legs of their steadiness — before a ball of fire and debris erupts through the floor in a dramatic flourish, blasting up towards the sky.

 

Sasuke stands on one side of it, still frozen in place. Shikamaru and Naruto are on the other side, just clear of the smoke and the flame. The instant before, their eyes lock in one torturously slow moment. Sasuke sees exactly when Naruto’s eyes fill with pure, unfiltered panic, where his breath catches on his name like he's choking.

 

Then he's gone.

 

Or, Sasuke is, since he's the one falling right through the floor. He feels himself gasp rather than hear it, because there's gunfire and screaming and sounds of a massacre springing forth as he plunges below.

 

What—

 

He hears his name called through a fog— like an old, distant memory—then he's smashing face first into the unforgiving floor. His consciousness wages war against it but ultimately loses, plunging him into darkness.

 

 

 

* * *

 

**C.**

He's not sure how long he's out. He blinks at his throbbing head and a deep, angry ache that pulls at his bones. There's noises of a battle around him but he's not sure from which direction.

 

What happened? Did someone attack the fort at the same time they did? What are the odds of that? Terribly unlucky ones, it seems.

 

He's not sure why he's surprised that the day’s gone to shit. It's what he expected going into it. Everything was suspiciously smooth sailing.

 

Not like this though. They weren't supposed to have an interruptions from any outside forces. Who are they? What do they want? He doesn't have time to think of that now. He needs to figure out where he is and find the others. They need to leave and figure out the rest later.

 

His head feels like it's screwed on backwards, but he forces himself to move.  Sasuke checks his bag, relieved to find the data sticks still intact. His gun doesn't fare so well, taking the blunt force of his body as he landed on it. No matter. He still has the knives in his boot and he's confident that he can take on any assailant in hand-to-hand combat if it comes down to it.

 

He stands on unsteady feet, surveying. Everything is burning and he hears gunfire through the gaping hole in the floor. Listening close, he realizes that doesn't hear any on the floor he's on, which means the offending force passed through already or hasn't made it up here. Either way, he needs to move fast.

 

Sasuke breaks into a slight jog, pressing against his comm, not surprised when he gets nothing but static in return. Shit. He doesn't know where anyone is or what's happening. He can't contact Naruto and ask if he's alright and that nearly sends him into a panic.

 

No. No. They're fine. Everyone is fine. They're going to escape and then they're going to change the world. They have to.

 

He stumbles on a dead body, face half burned off. Human then, with his face forever frozen in fear as the fire took him. Sasuke nearly gags at the smell, but presses on. He doesn't have time for pity. His fear pushes him forward and leads him towards the old hallway. He sees the outline of the door soon enough. It's blown open, half off of its hinges. Probably from the force of the explosion from earlier. There's darkness beyond it and he plans to stick his head out and call to anyone that might be there.

 

There's blood streaked everywhere, but he sees no more bodies. That's horrifying enough, since he doesn't know what it means.

 

The floor’s cracked and uneven as he gets closer to the door. This hall took the blunt force of it, with sections bubbled and upturned like barricades. He climbs over them, realizing then that his hands are bruised when they sting on contact. Great, more scars will dot this already marred body soon enough.

 

A hand snakes out from behind a fallen pillar, grabbing his arm in a vice grip. He bites down a shout.

 

He turns, ready to defend himself, only to deflate when he sees that it's Kimimaro who grabbed him.

 

He wracks his brain, remembering that he and Sora were near the fourth floor. That must be where Sasuke fell.

 

Wait, where is Sora?

 

“Sasuke?” He breathes, like he doesn't believe it to be him. They both move as one into a tight embrace and Sasuke can't be sure which one of them is shaking.

 

“What happened?” Sasuke ask hurriedly, checking him over for injuries.

 

“We heard yelling and fighting. Sora insisted we go into the hall to check it out since Gaara said he was going to as well. A bomb went off I think. I'm not sure. Some men came through here that I didn't know, so I hid.”

 

Most of the others probably went into the hall as well once the fighting started, curious as to what happened. That's not good. It'd be easier to locate the rest if they stayed in the stairwell. Now he'll have to search through the destroyed halls to make sure everyone is still intact.

 

“Not one of my best ideas.” Sora says shakily from his right. Sasuke hadn't noticed him in his relief, chest swelling when he hears him speak up. His joy dies an ugly death when he sees the state the boy is in.

 

Blood covers the ground, pooling out from the two stumps cut off at the knee. The blast tore his legs off, leaving him pale and shaking on the floor. He has other wounds but that's definitely the worst of it. It won’t be long, from the amount of blood on the floor and Sora’s drooping eyes. Sasuke swallows thickly and moves towards him.

 

Sora’s bottom lip trembles as Sasuke crawls over to him, eyes welling up as he gnaws at it.

 

“Hey.” Sora says softly as they face each other. Sasuke brushes the boy’s hair back from his face, blinking against the sudden rush of tears that threaten to spill out.

 

“Hey.” He parrots, unsure what to do. Fuck.

 

He's a child. He doesn't deserve this. If anyone deserved to make it out, it should have been him. Sasuke feels like screaming, like beating the ground until it breaks and demanding that someone _fix_ this. But they won't. No one will listen, as everyone here is caught up in their own agendas and damn if they won't carry them out.

 

 “You guys got it right? The stuff?” He questions. All Sasuke can do is nod, throat closing around curses for a God he knows doesn't hear him. “Good. That's good. I'm glad.”

 

Sasuke feels a bit faint when Sora closes his eyes and lean back against the wall, taking a shuddering, steadying breath. He slowly cracks them open, eyes dimming rapidly. Sasuke knows what's going to happen, knows how this is going to end, but he refuses to accept it. It's not right. It's not fair. He doesn't care if life has never been. He's going to curse it anyway—for the chips stacked against them, for the blood they've shed, for all they have lost.

 

He thinks of an old, sprawling stretch of graffiti that he used to pass on his way home every day in the capitol, faded after years of residency on a half-torn down house that once belonged to long-dead ousted dissenters.

 

_When did self-destruction become your only means of rebellion? When did you become so familiar—_

_—with the taste of your own blood?_

 

It questioned him, day in and day out, and still he has no answer.

 

 _“_ I guess it's good that I wasn't afraid to die, right?” He looks up at Sasuke with open, shiny eyes. “I feel like I did enough. I was helpful, right?”

 

“Of course.” Sasuke and Kimimaro confirm as one. Kimimaro places a hesitant hand on Sora’s shoulder, passing over it in smoothing strokes. He's trying to comfort him even though he just learned how. It's almost too much for Sasuke, but he holds himself together.

 

“You did more than I ever did, at your age.” Sasuke admits, absently petting his hair. “I'm so proud of you.”

 

Sora grins. It's watery and beautiful, so Sasuke commits it to memory. Sears it in his mind so he'll never forget.

 

“Thanks.” He whispers. “I...can you tell Naruto I'm sorry? He told me I wasn't allowed to go first, since I’m the youngest. I didn't mean to, so tell him to forgive me and not blame himself okay?”

 

“Yeah.” Sasuke replies hoarsely. Then again, forcing his voice stronger. “Yeah. Of course.”

 

Sora nods, head lolling to the side slowly. He shakes himself awake, refusing to succumb just yet. Kimimaro’s long, sad sigh is drowned out Sora’s next words.

 

“I didn't feel like I said enough earlier, so... you're really nice Kimimaro. I know you're a Two and all machine, but you're as human as any of us. And Sasuke…you're cool. A little weird and cranky, but cool. Make him happy, alright? Or I'll haunt you.”

 

“Okay.” Sasuke says, managing a small smile. Sora nods and returns it, looking off to the side. He surveys the destruction, eyes hooded and sad. He leans back against the wall, giving a shuddering sigh. Sasuke hates that he must suffer but he has no means to ease his pain. Instead, he pets his hair and hopes that Sora doesn't feel alone.

 

“Is it okay if I go now?” Sora asks quietly, eyes closing. Sasuke swallows down a sob, nodding even though the boy can't see him.

 

“Sleep, if you're tired.” Sasuke offers, feeling the first wave of tears break free from his hold.

 

Kimimaro stares long after he's gone, still sweeping a kind hand down Sora’s limp shoulder in comfort. He doesn't move for a long moment, so long that Sasuke feels he may simply have shut down from the stress.

 

Finally, he lifts one foot under him and then the other, standing on sturdy legs as his hand slowly pulls away.

 

Sasuke was already standing, face dried, waiting for the other man to find the strength to move. Kimimaro doesn't look at him, closing his eyes and bowing his head. Then it's up again, and he's staring down the hallway with renewed focus.

 

“Let's go.” He says and Sasuke’s already moving.

 

It's not too hard to get to the door from where they are. A few more small hops and jumps over upturned tiles and soon enough he’s leaning out of the open doorway and shouting out a loud: “Hello?” Cocking his head up and down to see if anyone can hear him.

 

The already broken staircase took a beating in the blast. The rattling knocked the rest of the haphazard stairs loose so the gaps are larger than before. It seems the top floors remain in fact, but the fourth floor and below completely broke away.

 

“Is anyone there?” He tries again when he gets no response. He shares a concerned look with Kimimaro, fearful that everyone is truly scattered or dead.

 

Nothing. No one in sight. Not a single soul. Sasuke swallows down bile that rushes up quickly to his sealed lips, refusing to give into his fears.

 

“They may have gone into the halls when the stairwell began to collapse.” Kimimaro reasons. “We cannot think the worst.”

 

Sasuke agrees. There's no way that everyone died so easily, just like that. A small comfort to think because they are cursed. If the lot of them are to perish they would no doubt suffer first. That logic dictates that they are somewhere here—maybe hurt and bleeding —but alive.

 

Tiny victories, and all that.

 

“You're right.” He says, nodding to the other man. “I'll look for them.” He hands Kimimaro the bag of data sticks, reluctant to let go of it. He knows that he should, since even if the rest are gone someone needs to escape with the information. No matter what he won't let this be for naught.

 

“This is…?” Kimimaro asks, looking at Sasuke in question.

 

“The data. I want you to take it and get to the rendezvous point.”

 

Kimimaro freezes, eyes widening. He looks at Sasuke like maybe the world is ending. In a way it is, but they surely don't have time to dwell on that now.

 

“Without you?” He asks, voice barely above a whisper. “ _Sasuke—_ ”

 

Sasuke places a steadying hand on his shoulders, cutting off whatever tragic, pleading prayer that was sure to come next. Like he expected, the other man stops in his tracks, shifting uncomfortably.

 

“ _Please.”_ Sasuke says, putting all his feeling behind it. “I don't want to split up either, especially not now, but you have to take this and go, alright? Promise me, whatever happens, you won't come back for us. Promise me.”

 

It's a very hard bargain. It goes against everything he's learned up until this point, everything he's experienced. They are one. They are a family. They don't abandon each other.

 

But Kimimaro is no fool either; not driven by sentiment and only by sensibility. He understands better than most what it means to be trapped, how to take the best option, how to overcome failure.

 

So that's why Sasuke sees a war wage on his face, unsure as to which part of himself should have control right now: the part of him that is a tactical machine, built to protect the records that the humans deemed important. Or, the part of him that was cultivated like his tiny little garden by the old, red farm, the part with emotions and attachment and naivety.

 

In the end, it's a mix of both. He nods grimly to Sasuke, silent like the grave, pausing only to give Sasuke a tight hug that shouldn't bring as many tears to his eyes as it does.

 

“Alright.” He says, scanning Sasuke’s face. He grips the bag tight, fingers turning white from the force of it. “But this time I expect you back with time to spare. I won’t cover for you, so don't be late.”

 

Sasuke smiles, pressing their foreheads together in promise. He closes his eyes, taking a moment to collect himself.

 

“I won't be.”

 

Kimimaro nods again, turning back towards the open doorway and carefully descending. Sasuke watches until he's at the bottom, waving when the other man looks up at him once more in fearful uncertainty. He hates it, the feeling that grips him. It's all wrong. Not at all how this should be playing out. But it's too late for that now.

 

He watches until the door closes back behind Kimimaro, praying for maybe the first time in his life that he'll make it back across the plains safely. He won't allow himself to think the worst, that it's over and that they failed. There's still hope and way too many faces to find amongst the rubble.

 

So he steels himself, turning back to the destroyed fourth floor with renewed resolve.

 

There’s no time to waste, he thinks, while breaking into a full sprint.

 

 


	9. Blue

* * *

 

 **Eight** ,

**Part II**

 

_Flames,_

_They licked the walls.  
Tenderly, they turned to dust,_

_All that I adore._

— Things We Lost in the Fire,

Bastille.

* * *

 

 

**A.**

Naruto watches, heart sinking to the depths of nothing as Sasuke disappears behind a ball of fire. He springs forward instantly, arms outstretched, fingers gripping at nothing while his mind roars like a beast in the night.

 

He doesn't care if he has to leap into the large, gaping hole in the floor. So what if it looks like a portal to hell? So what if he's putting himself in danger? Sasuke fell, and he has to catch him.

 

That's what he does, right? He catches him when he falls.

 

Shikamaru grabs him around the waist before he can take the dive, dragging him backward. Naruto instantly struggles, throwing his elbows and kicking his feet in what feels like a tantrum while his friend yells at him to calm down.

 

“Let me go!” He roars, scratching at the steel arms that keep him from moving.

 

“Fucking _stop it,_ Naruto!” Shikamaru yells back, frustrated from the kicks he's taking to his shins. “I'm not letting you go down there! You’ll kill yourself!”

 

He has to. He has to! He can't leave Sasuke to die. Not after everything. Not after they finally —

 

But he knows that Shikamaru’s right. He could crack his head open, or fall right into the flames. He can't see anything below, too blinded by the smoke and fire and his own hot, angry tears.

 

His mind is an ugly jumble, variables and possibilities passing through it at startling speeds. He tries to rationalize, regroup, analyze because he's so used to things going to shit and he's the one expected to provide the next move and the best answer. But he can't. He's devastated, sinking like a rock into the inky blackness that threatens to overtake him.

 

The fight leaves him, all at once, and without his struggling Shikamaru has to bear all his weight, causing them to fall to the floor in a tragic heap. He hears Shikamaru’s shaky sigh behind him and he rests his pounding head on the other man's shoulder, staring up at the hazy ceiling without really seeing it.

 

“He isn't dead.” Shikamaru says resolutely. “He's just not. He's too stubborn to die from that.”

 

Yeah, that sounds right to Naruto's ears. Sasuke is strong, tough, resilient. They aren't made of paper and, while a bone or two might have fallen out of place, he has to be alive.

 

But if he fell all the way down to the first floor? That far of a fall is still a bit of stretch. He could have hit something on the way down, or landed wrong.

 

“This is my fault.” Naruto hears himself saying. Shikamaru sucks in a breath, arms still around him but now they've softened into something gentle.

 

Something they never are with each other, anymore.

 

“I'm getting you all killed. I did this, pushed for this when I _knew_ —”

 

“Shut up.” Shikamaru says angrily, squeezing tighter. He never was one to let Naruto doubt himself, to fall into despair so easily. “We're not doing this. You're not going to break down right now. We all agreed to this, so stand the fuck up and see this through.”

 

Ah.

 

Okay. He's right. Naruto isn't allowed to do this. If he's going to beat himself up over it more than he already has—day after day after day—he can at least have the decency to do it once the dust has settled.

 

It still takes longer than it should to get his legs to work, but then he's standing and holding a hand out to help Shikamaru stand as well. They dust themselves off, no doubt going to pretend the last few minutes didn't happen.

 

They are not the touchy-feely sort, not anymore, so they'll pretend like the road Naruto was about to traverse never existed in the first place. A minor blessing, to be so broken that nothing fazes the other. They've seen it all and it's easily ignored.

 

For how much longer, though, when the weight they carry threatens to topple nations?

 

“It should have been you, instead of me.” Naruto says quietly after a while. He doesn't have to explain. He's sure Shikamaru knows what he means with perfect clarity.

 

His friend sighs, shaking his head this way and that. When he looks at Naruto, his eyes are sad and sincere. “No,” He chuckles humorlessly, “It really shouldn't.”

 

He doesn't get the chance to say anything more because there's an urgent pounding on the door that leads to the old stairwell.

 

They were so close to it, Naruto thinks bitterly. If they had just a few more seconds the three of them could have made it. But it's too late for that now and he jumps at the sudden knocking.

 

“What the hell?” Shikamaru exclaims, but he's already bounding over to throw the door open.

 

Suigetsu, Karin, and...The Other One spill into the hall, breathing heavily. What did Sasuke call him again? Taka. That's right. The sight of Sasuke’s clone nearly sends him into a fit, thinking that he's the real thing until their eyes meet. Naruto can't help but take a shuddering step back, unnerved and upset.

 

“ _Fuck_.” Suigetsu drawls, good hand gripping the doorknob for dear life. Karin collapses on the ground beside him, rattled, while Taka tries to disguise his hurt at Naruto’s knee-jerk reaction to the sight of him.

 

He fails.

 

“What happened?” Naruto demands, snapping out of his haze. He has to take control once more and figure out what's happening. The other two seem to take notice of him standing there and straighten themselves, rubbing weary hands over their faces.

 

“The stairs collapsed.” Karin says like she's in a rush. “They started folding like dominos so we ran up here as fast as we could.”

 

“Shit.” Shikamaru swears, pushing past them to look out in the stairwell. Sure enough, the stairs are but a memory, leaving behind the winding railing and a few jutting pieces of wood on the lower floors.

 

“Where's the other one? Juugo?” Naruto asks. “Wasn't he on the same floor as you?” He directs his question to Karin. She nods, turning to look back into the blackness.

 

Suigetsu answers quicker, pointing downward. “He went down. Some of yours were hurt so he climbed the railing to get to them.”

 

Naruto feels his heart beat quicker but tramples down a panicked outburst at the news. “Who?” He asks evenly.

 

The fake Sasuke speaks up next, like the three of them are taking turns with the explanations on purpose. It irritates him but he doesn't speak on it. “Sai hit his head pretty hard but Juugo said he was breathing. Kiba got roughed up in the blast, too, but he should pull through. Ino, Temari, and Tenten helped him take them to the rendezvous point.”

 

Naruto’s unspeakably relieved at this, silently counting off in his head who's accounted for and who's not. He doubts that these three have news on Gaara and Kankuro and they didn’t mention Sora or Kimimaro, so he'll still have to venture downstairs to find them as well as Sasuke.

 

“Where's Sasuke?” Taka asks, scanning their surroundings like he's read Naruto’s mind. It's a bit eerie.

 

Naruto’s tongue turns to lead in his mouth. He swallows, not able to form the words. Shikamaru handles it for him, mirroring Suigetsu's action from earlier. He points downward with his ring finger, saying: “The floor opened up and he fell.”

 

Three pairs of eyes widen in alarm. “What!” Suigetsu spits around a vicious curse. “What are we just standing here for, then? We need to fucking—”

 

“Calm down.” Karin says levely, pressing down her own worry. She grabs his arm lightning fast to keep him from springing forward. Naruto sees the same wild want in his eyes—the urge to run to where Sasuke is. To help, to _save_ — knows that his own reflect the same. Sees the qualities in Karin that Shikamaru has and, all at once, he understands.

 

He gets why he didn't like them so much, in this moment. Why their existence rubbed him the wrong way for so long. He licks his dry lips and shakes the thought out of himself.

 

“We still have the mission.” She says, squeezing harder when Suigetsu tries to free himself from her hold. “And there's somebody other than us making a mess of things down there so we can't just run around calling his name.”

 

“Fuck that,” Suigetsu says, grunting. “We already had to leave him once so I'll be damned if I do it again!”

 

Touching, but Naruto doesn't care about their feelings on the matter. Karin is right; they need to think of an escape. The stairwell is still an option, but as ruined as it is it'll take a while to get down from here. By no means does he plan to abandon Sasuke or any of the others, but they don't know what's happening or why there was an attack in the first place so they need to stay focused and make a plan.

 

“We don't all need to go to find the others.” Taka says lowly. They turn to look at him where he standing next to the smoldering hole in the floor. “It’s too dangerous and we still need to take the data they collected to safety. It's what we came for, after all.” Suigetsu scoffs, throwing his hands in the air in exasperation.

 

“Oh yeah? So what do you suggest, dipshit?” He asks angrily. Naruto can relate to his frustration but he's at least willing to listen without biting remarks. He absently wonders how Sasuke was ever able to get along with the man, crude as he is.

 

Ha. He knows the answer to _that_ , doesn't he?

 

Still, Suigetsu seem to deeply care about Sasuke’s wellbeing so maybe he judged him too harshly before. It wouldn't be the first time he's done that, so whatever.

 

“Two of us should take the bags outside and meet the others while the other three round up everyone still inside. Maybe we find out what's happening, maybe we don't. As long as we get out of here that's all that really matters.”

 

Naruto finds himself nodding, thinking something similar. He hates that, refusing to think of him as Sasuke. It's the real Sasuke he shares a mind with, not this one. He's being petty and downright petulant, he knows, but Taka’s existence make him very uncomfortable and he can't pretend like it doesn't.

 

Taka notices the discord on his face, frowning softly and avoiding eye contact. Naruto feels a quick stab of guilt but he pushes past it. Things to address later, when the building isn't threatening to come down around them.

 

“That sounds good.” Shikamaru confirms. They share a look—speaking fluently without having to utter a word—and then Shikamaru’s nodding to him and taking the bag that Naruto holds out to him.

 

“I'll take it.” He says. Karin steps forward, eyes determined and hard. “I'll go, too.” She states, taking the sack offered to her.

 

“We’ll go look for the others.” Taka mutters.

 

“Let's go, then!” Suigetsu says, impatient. He backs up, jogging backwards, much to the confusion of everyone else. In one decisive move he jumps clear of the crumbling hole on the floor, landing on the other side with dramatic flourish. He turns to stare at them with a grin, beckoning them forward.

 

“Since the stairs back there are shot to shit we can take the main ones. C’mon, while the coast is clear.” He disappears around the corner without another word.

 

Shikamaru shakes his head while Karin sighs. Naruto blinks before turning to address the two of them.

 

“Do you plan on climbing the railing down?” He asks. Shikamaru nods, staring into darkness.

 

“Yeah. Seems easier that way.” He looks at Naruto then, eyes soft and unsure. “Don't die on me.” He says quietly after a few beats. Naruto doesn't hesitate to step into him, throwing his arm around in a quick, hard embrace. Shikamaru immediately returns it, but they don't linger.

 

“I won't. I won't say goodbye, either.” He grins, even as the dread pools in his chest like a flash flood. “I'm getting real sick of doing that, you know?”

 

Shikamaru’s smile is just as empty as his. “You and me both.” He says, and then they're off.

 

Naruto doesn't wait until they get to the bottom even though he wants to. He readies himself to clear the hole as well but Taka’s grabbing his arm at the last moment, forcing him to attention.

 

He tries not to flinch.

 

“What is it?” He asks, irritation bubbling from being stopped.

 

Taka hesitates, probably startled by Naruto’s sudden anger. Or, that's not it. He's hesitating because in the next moment he's pulling something from behind his back.

 

It’s small, silver, almost shaped like a simple handgun but Naruto immediately knows that it's not.

 

“Why the fuck do you have that?” Naruto demands, pissed that such a weapon has been thrown into the mix when things have already degraded so quickly.

 

Taka doesn't blink at his outburst, still carefully holding the veritable black hole in his hands like it burns to have it touch his skin. “Sasuke entrusted it to me, when we met earlier. I wanted to give it to you, just in case…”

 

“In case what?” Naruto questions. He doesn't like this, not one bit, and when he finds Sasuke he's going to give him hell for not burying that thing as far underground as he could before they left the farm.

 

“I don't know. In case anything. If we can’t figure a way out of this it should be your choice how we end it.”

 

He says it too calmly, like he's already accepted the worst. Naruto refuses to be caught up in the implications, fighting to keep hope even though the day seems lost. Hell, this whole thing was already hopeless and far-fetched. What's a little more misplaced belief?

 

“Keep it.” Naruto mutters, gearing himself up for the jump again. “No one's using that thing today.”

 

“Hopefully. You never know.” Taka mumbles lowly behind him. Naruto looks at him dryly, to which Taka just shrugs. Cloning seems to have made this Other-Sasuke more cryptic and Naruto quickly decides that he’s not a fan.

 

Whatever. He doesn't have time to argue at a time like this. He braces himself and leaps, Taka following immediately after him. They round the corner and hug the wall near the main stairs, checking to make sure no one is milling about. There's no sound from below but that doesn't put him at ease. It seems the other force targeted the lower floors anyway so they won't encounter much until then.

 

Suigetsu's long gone, which Naruto expected. He feels a budding headache at having to deal with the two of them and their annoying antics.

 

“Is he always like this?” Naruto asks. Taka smirks, chuckling quietly to himself.

 

“Worse, usually.”

 

Naruto snorts, drawing his gun. “Cute.”

 

He sees Taka raise an eyebrow and roll his eyes, taking out his own weapon.

 

“If that's what you want to call it.”

* * *

 

**B.**

Sasuke skids to a stop on the third floor, taking in his surroundings. More dead, seemingly killed in the blast. A few show wounds that don't align with that conclusion; bullets painting them burgundy against the stark-white floor. He thinks this is where it started, near the meeting area. There's a large conference room on this floor and they were using it for the summit.

 

Now that he has some time to think, he wonders if all the leaders of the colonies are dead. If the blast started in the conference room they most likely are. If not, then some may have at least survived. He wonders what their deaths would spell for their plans. It would certainly throw a wrench in it, since the colonies would be thrown into chaos from the news and their message might be lost to the swelling tides of widespread panic.

 

It doesn't matter to him. They've come this far, so they'll _make_ the people listen.

 

—Even if the herd

He grazed the pastures with,

Is starting to grow thin.

 

He goes to turn the corner, not looking like he should, and runs straight into someone else who's stalking these halls.

 

Sasuke curses, unprepared and off-guard, but he isn't rewarded with a bullet to the face for his negligence, so that's a start.

 

Genma stares down at him, brow furrowed and lips tight. He’s covered in blood but it doesn’t seem like his own. Sasuke hadn’t thought he’d be here, but of course he’d have to follow where his charges were sent off to.

 

Sasuke hasn't seen him since that night with Kidomaru, all those months ago. It’s like a dream now. Distant and hazy like it happened in another life. Like he watched those events in passing instead of living it.

 

He was right to assume that Genma would be fine, since he's standing here instead of rotting like Mitsuki. There is no feeling that comes with that revelation, no joy or grief, since they've never managed to say two words to each other that weren't hateful. He does not think they will break that streak at the present moment.

 

“Where the fuck have you been?” Genma demands, grabbing Sasuke by the arm and getting in his face. “You were supposed to be on guard! It's a fucking massacre but of course you idiots run off when—”

 

He paused mid-rant, head cocking like he's missing something. Sasuke stares him dead in the eye, waiting. Watching. He's not sure what for. Genma sees what he’s looking for though, because he's stepping back with a curse and hackles raised in suspicion.

 

“Fuck.” He says, eyes wide and pale. “You're the real one?”

 

Oh. He figured it out. That took less time than Sasuke would have thought. If he honest, he didn't think he'd figure it out at all.

 

Sasuke chooses not to answer, tugging his arm out captivity and roughly pushing the handler to the side.

 

“Move.” He grunts. “I really don't have time for this.”

 

Genma’s not going to let him go. Of course he’s not. Not that easily. Sasuke forgot for a moment that the man isn't used to this side of him. The Sasuke that Genma’s familiar with is obedient, quiet, submissive. A disgusting groveling pushover. He does not know the Sasuke that blistered under his skin until it boiled him alive.

 

Sasuke died that day, at the fringes of that rusty old fishing town. He finally left Earth and lost himself amongst the stars. He will not stand for anchors, how big or how small, that wish to tie him to an existence that he tirelessly buried once and for all.

 

“You finally grow some balls?” Genma asks, incredulous. He smirks, ugly and predatory. “Adorable. I always knew you were faking it, you know. You could hide behind that mask of yours but your eyes didn't lie.”

 

Genma pulls a knife from his belt, twisting it this way and that. Sasuke stiffens, reaching for one of his own. He hates the way the other man is looking at him, like he's found a shiny new toy that promises endless amusement.

 

Well, if he wants a fight, a fight he shall have.

 

Sasuke did come here for fun. He came to get shit done. Enough with avoiding blood and violence. He’s been in the deep end for a long while, floating on his back in the dark waters, quite willing to sink.

 

He decides in the moment to go limp, to let the waves usher him under.

 

He takes a deep breath and let’s go.

 

“Oh yeah? And what did my eyes say?” He asks, shifting his legs apart. Genma watches him, grin sliding wider and wider.

 

“That you could kill us all without breaking a sweat. And that you always had better places to be.” Genma says, chuckling. “I guess you did, huh?”

 

Sasuke nods, narrowing his eyes and adjusting his grip. “And what do they say now?” He asks dangerously. He sees Genma stiffen, eyelids twitching in surprise. He collects himself, smirk slipping only slightly before he's lunging forward to try and embed his knife in Sasuke’s lung.

 

Sasuke dodges effortlessly, pivoting his ankle and using the momentum to perform a perfect jab. Genma barely contorts his body in enough time to escape it; he takes a knick to his flank that leaves him hissing.

 

Sasuke feels him lips twitch in a small smile. It infuriates Genma, even more so when Sasuke’s proudly announcing: “First blood.” In an overly satisfied tone.

 

That spurs him on, swinging in wide arches that Sasuke can see coming from a mile away. He can hear Genma gritting his teeth, frustrating building at Sasuke’s artful dodging. He rushes forward, aiming for the neck, but Sasuke sweeps his legs from beneath him and presses the knife into his shoulder in the same instant.

 

Genma grunts, but uses Sasuke’s distraction from a successful hit to his advantage, faking left as Sasuke goes right, peeling the fabric of his suit off of his arm and soaking it with blood.

 

Sasuke barely feels any pain from the swipe, jumping backwards to avoid getting cut again. He tests it with two fingers, tapping the wound to make sure it isn't deep. It's not, but it emboldened Genma all the same. He grins, licking the blood off his knife in a gross, self-satisfied way.

 

“Tell me something, freak,” He says, cocking his head inquisitively. “Did you set this up? Get with some guys to take out the kings?”

 

“No.” Sasuke replies, narrowing his eyes. He hates bleeding, hates when someone else makes him bleed even more. He's always been one to pay it back ten-fold. “I had nothing to do with that. I'm here for something else.”

 

“And what would that be?” Genma asks. He looks genuinely curious. Sasuke doesn't care and he doesn't have to explain himself. Certainly not to someone who's about to die.

 

“Well, I'd say that you'd find out soon enough but you won't.”

 

Genma’s grin is blinding. All teeth, eyes hidden behind the folds of his skin. “You gonna kill me, skinjob? Huh? You think so?”

 

Sasuke shrugs, feeling wild and loose and for once, totally like himself.

 

“Yeah.” He grins back. “I really, really do.”

 

Genma rushes him again. It's sloppier and less coordinated in his excitement. There's barely any grace in his thrusts, twisting this way and that just to miss by a hair’s breadth. They're unaligned; Sasuke’s dancing a dignified waltz instead of the fiery tango. Genma does not care for the steps, rushing through them as if the lights on the stage are growing dim and hecklers shout from the crowd. The lack of refinement is what ultimately decides the winner.

 

Sasuke purposely comes in slowly. He expects Genma to try to catch his arm and he does not disappoint. He sees the light shine in the human’s eyes, thinking this will be the decisive blow. It will be.

 

For one of them.

 

Sasuke bodily throws himself into Genma. He's heavy, weighed down by his existence, by his sins, by the truths he found about himself and his people. It's far too much for an ignorant fuck like Genma to carry so he drops like a lead weight.

 

Sasuke straddles him, knocking the knife out of his hand and he grabs his hair to bash his head against the ground. Genma still has some fight in him, so Sasuke simply breaks one of his wrists when he tries to struggle. Genma cries out in pain and Sasuke blinks, sense coming back to himself like a slap over the head. He shouldn't have. The noise could attract attention if anyone is still around to hear. But he's done playing around and the time for this grows ever shorter.

 

“You fucker!” Genma cries through gritted teeth. There's shadows of fear in his eyes now, like he's just now realizing what is happening. A small part of Sasuke hates himself for relishing in it. The other, larger parts scoffs at his pain and places a hand around the human’s neck.

 

“You said it yourself, didn't you? I could kill you without breaking a sweat. Do you want it quick and painless, or should I make you suffer like you did so many others?”

 

For Genma’s sin was not just watching. Watching the abuses the Synths had to go through and turning a blind eye. No, sometimes he embodied them, turning into a monster in the dark for the pretty little charges he could command.

 

Sometimes they disappeared after missions only reappear quiet and shaking and mistrustful of any male hands. Sometimes he looked at Karin like that—leering and licking his lips when he thinks no one’s around to see—but he feared her station and bite. She was favored and wouldn't stand for his hot gaze and wandering touch.

 

Such reminders rob him of choice, since so few had it with him, so Sasuke makes up his mind for him.

 

Genma grunts. He must see the decision in Sasuke’s eyes without him having to say it.

 

“If you didn't do this,” He asks, eyes darting around as they try to focus on something besides the pain. “Who did?”

 

He’s not sure why that’d be the last thing he wanted to say but Sasuke's not one to judge. He's got a good answer for him anyway, so he leans in close and looks him squarely in the eye, grinning at Genma’s wide, fearful eyes.

 

“I have no fucking idea.” He whispers, and there's no time for Genma to react before Sasuke’s snapping his neck with a loud _crack._

 

He feels no joy from it, but maybe a bit of justice. He cannot right all the wrongs with death, but it is a good start.

 

He rises quickly. Sasuke isn't sure why but he feels like he's on a time limit; the deadline is close and he's sure he doesn't want to find out what that means.

 

He moves for a while until he rounds another corner, ready this time with his knife out and his defenses raised. He hopes he will not run into any hostiles again, wary of the cut on his arm and the slight dizziness that still follows him from the fall. He wasn't in top-form in that fight and he dreads the thought of meeting someone who could possibly be his match.

 

Luck is not on his side today, since a man he doesn't recognize comes waltzing out of the miscellaneous rooms in the hall at that exact moment, whistling to himself while carrying a severed head.

—What the fuck?

 

Sasuke’s so thrown by the sight that he freezes, catching the other man’s attention by being the only other living thing in the area.

 

The tall man grins, tilting his head in a friendly way. Sasuke’s confused, unsure as to what's happening, until he sees something small and black hurtling towards him.

 

_Shit!_

 

Something heavy smashes into his side. Solid and warm. It takes too long to realize that it's Suigetsu who’s tackled him, splayed across him in a heap.

 

The grenade ravages the hall behind them, sending hot gusts of air to swirl around in a tizzy. The already hazy hall gets too dense to see through for moment, stuffy and hot as all the air flees the area. Sasuke catches a gasp, for he surely would have died if that thing hit him. From his place on the ground he sees two more bodies ducked beside him. A longer look reveals that it's Kankuro and Gaara.

 

Suigetsu springs up almost immediately, firing off shot after shot at the mystery attacker, swearing colorfully. The assailant goes down with a choked cry and doesn't get up again.

 

“Fuck man,” Suigetsu says as they all watch the body for signs of life.  There are none, not after that full clip. “You gotta be quicker than that. We almost could have matched.” The metal arm thrust in his face is a stark reminder.  

 

“Thanks.” He says, accepting Suigetsu's offered aid to help him up. “Who the hell was that?”

 

“No clue.” Suigetsu shrugs. “That’s a first. Everyone else I've come across was dead except these two.”

 

He juts a finger in the brothers’ direction. Kankuro nods in greeting while Gaara scans the area for any other signs of life.

 

Despite their usual animosity it's nice to see that the other man is alright in the face of what’s happened. Sasuke should voice this in meaningful way, but he's too caught up in his own questions and confusion.

 

“You got all the way down here without any problems?” Sasuke asks Suigetsu. He remembers that the white haired man was on the seventh floor. He passed through three floors and there wasn't a single soul stirring? That's worrisome.

 

How skilled is the other group that attacked? Have they killed all the human soldiers and workers inside and out? There were twice as many soldiers here today and he’s seen none of them. Come to think of it, he hasn't heard any gunshots in a while and the matter of the man carrying a bloody head is far too disturbing to ignore.

 

“Yeah. I was looking for you when we ran into each other. Nearly blew each other's brains out before we realized who's who.”

 

He raises an eyebrow, almost surprised that Suigetsu openly admitted to searching for him. Usually in situations like these, he'd say he “happened” upon him rather than actively seeking him out. But this isn't their usual beat so he has no choice but to cut to the chase.

 

Gaara butts in, garnering Sasuke’s attention. “Naruto’s on his way down with your clone. Shikamaru has already left, apparently.” He informs. Sasuke can't help the way his body sags in relief at that, overjoyed at the news. His heart threatens to beat out of his chest, glad nothing happened in his absence. The look on Naruto’s face as he fell is etched into his brain and he'll do anything to erase it.

 

“And the others? What of them?” Sasuke asks.

 

“Most of them have already escaped. We can only hope they made it to the meeting point safely.” Kankuro says. “The only ones we don't know of are Kimimaro and Sora.”

 

Sasuke freezes, swallowing thickly. Gaara sees his stricken look and mirrors it, crossing his arms and letting out a string of muffled curses.

 

“Both of them?” He questions lowly, not looking at him.

 

“Just Sora.” Sasuke confirms gravely. “He was hurt badly in the initial blast. There was nothing that could be done.”

 

“Shit.” Suigetsu mutters, kicking absently at a loose piece of rubble. “Just a fucking kid.”

 

“What?” Another voice says behind them. They all turn quickly, raising their weapons to defend themselves, but it's only Naruto and Taka.

 

Naruto's eyes are wide, no doubt from hearing what was just said. Sasuke’s heart sinks; he didn't want him to find out like that, hoping to share the unfortunate news gently. But when have they ever gotten the chance for that?

 

“Sora’s dead?” He asks, swinging his head to look at the lot of them. Gaara doesn't meet his eyes but Sasuke has to. He can't flinch away from this but can't help the ugly churning in his gut when Naruto’s face contorts in grief.

 

“I'm sorry.” He says immediately, even though it's meaningless. “He told me to tell you he’s sorry, but he's going first.”

 

He as good as slapped him with those final words, because Naruto nearly chokes and has to shut his eyes, willing away the devastation that rocks him in that moment.

 

When he opens them, there's no trace of the storm that raged on his face mere seconds before. Sasuke feels something fleeting like fear towards him, awed in the face of his careful control.

 

“Okay.” Is all he says. “Then that's that. Everyone is accounted for. We need to go.”

 

Sasuke nods, ready to move, but Kankuro protests with a shake of his head.

 

“Wait, you don't want to figure out what's happening? We don't know who these people are or what they want.”

 

“That doesn't have anything to do with us,” Gaara argues. “We got what we came for. Whatever befalls this place isn't on our shoulders.”

 

“I agree.” Sasuke hears himself saying. He sees Gaara’s brow raise but ignores him. Not everything about them has to be contrary, especially in matters of life and death. “These people are clearly dangerous and have high powered explosives. We shouldn't fight them since we're probably outnumbered and maybe even outmatched.”

 

“Yeah, I'm good on that.” Suigetsu chimes in. “We really don't have a reason to go after them, unless you want revenge or something.” He addresses Naruto, looking at him carefully as he waits for his answer.

 

“No.” Naruto says evenly. He doesn't take any time to think it over, immediately coming to a decision. “We're hurt and disoriented and desperately need to regroup. We'll just go.”

 

“Alright.” Kankuro agrees, but the shadows of uncertainty remain like a dark cloud.

 

“Now we only have to—” Suigetsu starts, waving his arm in a wide arch. He gets cut off by another voice joining the fray, something deep and angry from the other end of the hall.

 

“What a mess.” The voice says, snapping them all to attention, they turn, weapons ready. Sasuke moves his body unconsciously so that he stands in front of Naruto.

 

Two dead eyes stare back at them, unimpressed and uninterested. He’s tall, with a shock of silver hair and a long robe he hasn't bothered to close, scarred chest on display. Sasuke’s on edge because his mind screams DANGER at the very sight of him. He's reminded of the time he met Kakashi, when he knew something was very wrong at first glance. He cannot figure out what's so off about him, but he isn't too keen on finding out.

 

“Ah. You guys aren't human.” The man says matter-of-factly, cocking his head to the side. “That makes sense. Probably wouldn't have made it this long if you were.”

 

They need to leave. They need to get away. Sasuke senses this from the depths of his soul and he doesn't understand why. His mouth won't move but he wants to scream for everyone to scatter. _Flee_! His roaring mind yells, _While you still can_!

 

“Who are you?” Kankuro asks, aiming his gun squarely at the man’s heart.

 

There's a switch in the figure’s features for a split second — something evil and sinister that rattles Sasuke’s bones— so quickly it rises and falls that he's almost certain he imagined it, until he hears Naruto’s sharp intake of breath and a muffled curse from Suigetsu. He isn't looking at either one but knows that their hackles are raised.

 

Too quick. He barely sees it. Barely sees the flick of the wrist and the knife is being thrown with frightening accuracy. It flies past Sasuke’s face with a _woosh_ and a _thud,_ embedding itself in its mark like it was cutting through paper.

 

Sasuke feels the color drain from his face, the air escape from his lungs. A cut blossoms on his cheek; a small line of blood curving under his chin. His body twitches in shock; He wills his head to move, for his eyes to look, catching sight of the bright red blood flowing out from Kankuro’s neck.

 

No movement.

 

Just shock, disbelief, surprise. Naruto’s ashen gray, Taka curses and Suigetsu's jaw hits the floor. Gaara’s lips part but no sound emerges.

 

Kankuro stumbles back, hands feebly reaching for the knife stuck in his neck. He misses once, twice, a third time, before he's finally touches it. A flood erupts from his lips, spilling over them as he coughs violently.

 

Gaara reaches out weakly with a shaking hand. He can do nothing. Sasuke sees this immediately: it's already over. It does not stop him from reaching out when Kankuro falls since Gaara cannot move fast enough, his knees locked and head swimming.

 

Sasuke catches him and slides down to the floor, propping up his back and supporting his head. Kankuro chokes, eyes darting quickly but not focused on anything. His lips part to say something but it's too garbled, throat too ravaged to utter a sound. He's shaking, more and more blood flowing out from its hiding place and his eyes begin to roll.

 

He tries to focus on Sasuke, tries to speak again. Sasuke looks deep into his eyes and nods desperately, gripping his hand tightly. His own breath shudders and threatens to cease.

 

Too quick. It's only been minutes—seconds maybe, but it feels like eons. Sasuke feels Kankuro twitch one last time and then he's limp. Too quick. Just like that, he's gone.

 

“Don't interrupt me.” The man says casually, staring down at Kankuro’s still form angrily. Sasuke drags his eyes away from the dead to look up at him, wordless rage gripping his chest.

 

Gaara roars, charging forward. Naruto does the same, face contorted in agony. They are caricatures of themselves, wild and angry and unreachable.

 

Sasuke gently lets Kankuro ease from his arms, placing him lightly on the floor and closing his eyes. Suigetsu's staring down at the body, eyes wide, still frozen from shock. The two of them make eye contact and Sasuke isn't surprised to see tendrils of fear swirling in Suigetsu’s gaze.

 

He feels the same. They are some of the best marksmen the government had to offer, yet they couldn't anticipate that move. Didn't see until it was too late. That's a level they aren't familiar with, a level they can't come near. And that's frightening.

 

He's not paying attention, too caught up in in his own swirling thoughts when Taka shouts in alarm. Sasuke jerks his head to the side so hard he hears it crack, heart seizing in his chest when he sees that in such a short time the man has made Gaara’s left arm useless, dangling limply at his side. Broken from the looks of it.

 

He has Naruto on the ground, grinding a boot into his chest while the blond man struggles.

 

 _Fuck_! He thinks, panicking. Who is this man and why is he so strong?

 

He will not be enough to stop this. Not armed with a knife and nothing else. Sasuke recognizes this immediately; he’s always the first to be aware of his own limitations. He is watching with eyes blown wide, fearful that the others are to be killed, since it seems that is what the mysterious figure intends.

 

It's Taka who moves faster than all of them, brandishing the weapon Sasuke gave him earlier for safe keeping. What a fool he was, since his Other is glaring with a crazed look and a finger poised entirely too close to the trigger.

 

“Let him up.” Taka says calmly, like a vein isn't threatening to burst forth through his forehead and like his knees aren’t asking to be let in. “You know what this is, don't you?”

 

The figure looks up, raising an eyebrow. He flinches when he sees what Taka’s holding, blinking rapidly in poorly disguised surprise. Then he snorts, waving his hand around in a mocking way.

 

“Do you?” He asks slowly, like he's talking to a child. “Because if you do, why threaten me with such a thing? You’ll all disappear too if you fire it, you know.”

 

How _does_ this man know what that is? Who is he, to have come across one before?

 

“I know.” Taka says casually, topping it off with a shrug. Suigetsu's looking at him like he's grown a second head and Sasuke sure he's making the same face. He himself is not _**that**_ insane so maybe they do truly differ after all.

 

Gaara watches in uneasy silence, panting as he presses himself against the wall, steady himself and holding his arm. Naruto’s face is unreadable from his place on the ground. He doesn't look worried in the slightest, somehow, and Sasuke doesn't know what to make of that.

 

“I also know that you don't want to die here. You have more to do, don't you?” Taka asks. The other man’s eyes grown sharp like he's been caught somehow. The prideful type then, or someone who wants to bask in the glory instead of being the martyr. The glory of what, though? What have they done here beside the murder of many?

 

“We just want to leave. Let us go and we won't cause you any trouble.” Taka finishes, adding a quiet, near desperate: “Please.” At the end of it.

 

The man considers, foot still firmly pressed on Naruto’s sternum. Sasuke knows he's holding his breath, unsure if he should hold absolutely still or not at the risk of provoking the strange figure.

 

He knows the others are, too, and he hates the tense atmosphere that's swirling around them, hates even more that—for all his power and experience—he's useless here, at the mercy of some crazed fiend who potentially holds their lives in his hands.

 

Slowly his leg raises from Naruto’s form. He takes a step back, raising his hands in mock surrender. Naruto rolls on his side, coughing, and then he's springing up and away from the offender, watching him with cold eyes. He gets a cruel grin in return of his efforts, the man puffing his chest out like he's won something.

 

“Alright.” He agrees. “You'll never get out of here, anyway, but let's see how this plays out.”

 

“What does that mean?” Gaara grunts, standing back to his full height. The man regards him smugly, shrugging.

 

“It means the rest of my team will be here soon to “clean up” and if you can't handle me you certainly can't handle them.” He says around a mocking chuckle.

 

“Besides, the front of this place is still crawling with soldiers. Their orders are to shoot on sight, so we're all trapped inside because they have this place surrounded. At least, until my backup comes, that is.”

 

Well isn't that just _great,_ Sasuke thinks. Out of the frying pan and into the fire.

 

“But I'll let you go. Like you said: I have more to do. Run along now.” He says, waving them off like it’s nothing.

 

Sasuke sees the other struggle to stamp down their emotions, to not lash out at his nonchalance. He struggles with the same, wanting desperately to put a bullet between his eyes for what he's done. But he doesn't and he won't, since he knows a Hail Mary when he sees one.

 

No one moves, unsure if he really means it. They wait for a surprise attack that doesn't come. He only watches and waits for them to collect themselves and disappear from his sight, hand on his hip and tapping his foot. Sasuke’s so upset, so confused, somewhat afraid, but he's the first to force his legs to move and he makes his way to Gaara to support his weight.

 

Gaara takes his aid freely, saying nothing. Naruto doesn't take his eyes off the fiend, sneering, but he doesn't make a move to attack. He's smarter than that. The man stares back, grinning.

 

“I know you, don't I?” He asks Naruto, who only blinks in response.

 

“No, I don't think we've met.” Naruto grits out, desperately trying to keep his anger under control. The look the man gives him is knowing and strange, but Naruto looks genuinely confused and Sasuke’s convinced that he really doesn't know who he is.

 

 “Not you.” He tuts with a shake of his head. “The other one.” He then points to Sasuke, who can't help flinch in surprise. He has no idea to the man’s identity and he would surely remember coming across such a figure before, wouldn't he? Distinctive as he is.

 

“I've never seen you before in my life.” Sasuke says since it’s the truth. Gaara’s brow furrows in confusion, as do the others. No one is sure what he’s on about and the tension in the hall ratchets up ten-fold.

 

Then man shrugs again, still smiling a knowing smile. “You're probably right and I'm probably mistaken. Oh well. Take care of yourselves, okay?”

 

He laughs at their reactions, waving himself away as he disappears around the corner.

 

They don't move for a long while, feet rooted to the spot like they're made of cement. Naruto stares in the direction the man went, brow low and pensive. His fists are clenched hard enough to draw blood.

 

Taka is still holding the anti-matter gun, albeit loosely down by his side. He finally relaxes, bravado fleeing from his body as quickly as it came. Suigetsu titters uncomfortably, looking at everyone one by one to gauge their state of mind. He fails, since his own is just as jumbled.

 

Gaara doesn't speak, throat croaking from grief as he tries. He leans heavily into Sasuke’s side, desperate for comfort regardless of who it's from. Sasuke pulls him closer to try and give him that. He can tell that Gaara appreciates it from his hard swallow and weak nod. He cannot look at his brother so Sasuke gently faces him away.

 

“We should go.” Sasuke announces quietly, taking charge since no one else seems to be in the state to do so. That spurs the others into action, blinking away whatever thoughts arrested them so.

 

Naruto walks over to Kankuro’s body, leaning down on one knee. He pets his hair absently for a moment, pressing a kiss to his brow in a final goodbye. He doesn't move, body stiff and shaking. But when he rises he is blank. Shoulders squared and eyes hard.

 

“Yeah. Let's go.” He says, marching ahead to take the lead.

 

Taka silently follows, sending a look over his shoulder to Sasuke.

 

He adjusts Gaara’s weight on him to better suit their movement before setting off.

 

Suigetsu's the last to move, surveying the smoldering, destroyed hall and the field of bodies, whispering a small: “Fuck.” To himself before he jogs to catch up.

 

 

Fuck indeed.

 

* * *

 

**C.**

They're getting shot at, the soldiers that spotted them aiming for their heads as they run for their lives. The man was right: the fortress was surrounded, reinforcements spilling in from every direction, attracted to the billowing flames that climb high into the sky like a beacon.

 

They managed to sneak past most of them through one of the other stairways that remained intact. They spilled out near the front entrance and were almost in the clear, but a perceptive eye and loud shout alerts the rest of the soldiers to their presence.

 

“Goddammit!” Suigetsu yells, shooting back. He downs two of them but that does barely anything to thin the herd. There's way too many for them to handle right now, with Gaara hurt and their distinct lack of long-range weapons.

 

No matter how Sasuke looks at it, no matter how many simulations he runs or ideas he comes up with, each bullet they dodge and hydra they fell spells out one thing. They're wholly and truly —

—trapped.

 

They see an opportunity in the form of a spiky wooden barricade—a museum-like relic in this age of metal and ash—driving behind it as fast as they can.

 

A throwback to a bygone age, like most of the commodities here. Pointless in theory with the weaponry they have now that guns and bombs could completely obliterate it, but it's a small reprieve all the same—much needed since he can barely keep up while trying to carry someone else.

 

“I hate to say this,” Suigetsu says, catching his breath. “But we're kinda fucked.”

 

“It isn't looking good, no.” Taka concurs, flinching when a bullet ingrains itself into the wood behind his head with a loud _thud_.

 

Naruto says nothing, staring forward. A small forest of trees is just beyond them, so close yet so far. The meeting point not too far off from there. With time, they could make itand lose themselves within the woods, far from the bullets and the trouble. They don't have that time, not with the rapidly advancing soldiers and the threat of another unseen force licking at their heels.

 

The rest of that violent man’s team must not have arrived yet based on the amount of soldiers that are aiming for their lives. Sasuke’s convinced from that small glance at that man’s power that, if they had already made an appearance, all would be quiet on this western front.

 

But they are no saviors. If they were here, his little team would bite the dust as well. _Something_ has to give, before this situation grows worse and worse.

 

Naruto turns to look at him, eyes hooded and wavering. “I don't know what to do.” He admits, just above a whisper, and Sasuke’s heart sinks.

 

He doesn't know, either.

 

Another time, another place similar to this one plays in his head. He closes his eyes against his own sense of defeat, of its finality. There will be no one to save them. Not this time. No one to call out to them as they cower amidst the smoke and the blood. No one to usher them to safety when they thought all hope was lost.

 

Gaara grunts, attempting to sit up further on his own. He waves away Sasuke’s move to help him, shaking his head.

 

“Leave me.” He says, gritting his teeth. “I'm slowing you down. I'll distract them and give you time to escape.”

 

“No,” Taka replies before Naruto or Sasuke can voice their displeasure and protest. He gives Sasuke a resigned look that he hates. “I'll go. I'm the spare, anyway.”

 

“ ** _Taka_** _—”_ Sasuke chides sharply. He refuses to accept that. He has a right to his own existence too, not reduced to cannon fodder even if the situation calls for it.

 

Naruto’s face is hard and determined, so much so that Sasuke snakes his hand out to grab his arm, anticipating his next move even though Naruto hasn't uttered a word.

 

“ _Absolutely not_.” Sasuke hisses. Naruto flinches mutely, caught before he could offer himself. “It'll be me, before you.”

 

Naruto narrows his eyes and wrenches his arm away out from Sasuke’s grip. “As if I'll allow that.”

 

He thinks that all of their bonds are good, since they can argue over who should be the one to die at a time like this.

 

Somehow that's calming, setting his ruined thoughts at ease.

 

Taka makes a noise of alarm, flailing as he's pushed to the side. Three heads whip around, taking in the sight of Suigetsu pressing a button on his suit as he goes to stand.

 

Sasuke panics, grabbing desperately at Suigestu’s arm before he can get too far.

 

“What the hell are you doing?” He demands, heart rising to his throat, beating wildly. “Are you insane?!”

 

He pressed the self-destruct. A failsafe built in for moments like this, so if they are captured or tortured they won't give away any information to the enemy. Sasuke can't believe Suigetsu would go that far or that he managed to beat Sasuke to it, since he fully planned to use his own.

 

It's the whole reason he repaired his suit anyway.

 

Just in case.

 

Suigetsu grins. It's more reckless than his usual one, loose and unhinged, and it makes goose bumps erupt violently on Sasuke’s skin.

 

“You know damn well I am.” He jokes. But then, quieter, more serious: “Let me do this, okay?”

 

He doesn't know what to say. Why? Why would he throw his life away for them? He's always looked out for himself, never caring about anyone else. What changed?

 

“I hate confessions.” He says, looking at Sasuke almost sheepishly. “But I guess I should say that Karin wasn't the only one with a crush since I probably won't get the chance again.”

 

—Oh.

**Oh.**

 

He guesses that he should have seen it ages ago, should have understood when Suigetsu's eyes were always on him. He thought it meant something else, all that history and anger because of Sasuke’s inattention. Since he ignored the three of them most of the time, rejected their branches offered in friendship. But he didn't and he feels like a right fool to have been blind to it so long.

 

“I—” He starts, eyes wide. He's floundering, unable to find the words. He feels the eyes on him from every direction, blinking in various states of surprise. He ignores them and buttons his lips when Suigetsu holds up his hand.

 

“It’s fine. You don't have to say anything. I knew you were holding a torch for someone else anyway, even though you didn't say.” He sees Naruto square his shoulders out of the corner of his eyes, like he's being challenged. Suigetsu chuckles at the sight, shaking his head softly.

 

“Part of me knew it would always end up like this, saving your dumb ass. So, let me do this. You guys go change the world and shit. I'll cover you.”

 

“Suigetsu —” He doesn't deserve this, doesn't want to watch him throw himself to the wolves. Not for _Sasuke_ , not after how cruelly he treated him over the years. Not when they're so close and maybe they can all make it.

 

He knows they can't, knows this may be the only chance to make their escape. But _fuck,_ he doesn't want him to die.

 

Something about Suigetsu is invincible. A staple in his life, outfitted with a witty one-liner and a grin. Someone so full of life doesn't deserve to go out like this. Or, maybe this is his version of a blaze of glory. It could be very fitting but Sasuke’s too overcome with emotion to decide if that's the case.

 

“Sorry, dude,” Suigetsu says, throwing a playful look to Naruto. He tugs Sasuke by the back of his head and pressed a hard kiss to his lips. Sasuke’s caught too off guard to do much of anything, the other mouth upon his muffling a surprised squawk. He hears Naruto snort behind him.

 

Sasuke blinks up at him and Suigetsu laughs in his face, throwing his head back at the look Sasuke sports, wiping away an imaginary tear.

 

He sobers, smile turning sad. Sasuke feel something inside him cracking. His heartbeat rabbits up, threatening to stop beating all together. Too much today, too much loss and grief. He's not sure how much more he can take.

 

“Let's get along better in the next life, alright?” Suigetsu says. “Hell, maybe I'll even meet you first.”

 

“Okay.” Sasuke agrees. He can do little else.

 

Suigetsu grins again, eyes disappearing from how hard he smiles. The mid-afternoon sun catches the corner of his teeth and the glint of his metal arm. It nearly blinds him. He almost raises his arm to shield his eyes from the sight of it.

 

Standing under the rays, he almost has a halo.

 

Sasuke swears to remember him just like that. Just like this moment, where he's sunny and shining.

 

“See ya.” He says, laughing wildly as he springs from their hiding place, raising his arms up in fake surrender.

 

Sasuke grabs Gaara as fast as he can, pushing away from the wood to take off. Naruto and Taka follow, ducking low as they run for the cover of trees.

 

He cannot help but turn and look at the last moment, honored by the sight. Suigetsu deserves to be witnessed in his sacrifice and he will do that just.

 

Sasuke sees him give up his ruse to run towards the advancing shoulders as they try to shoot him down. He leaps forward, wild and free, before —

 

He ignites, red hot. So suddenly, a spectrum of colors flying across the field and obscuring his vision. Bright Blue, like Saint Elmo’s fire. The color he was always marred with finally overtook him. Sasuke, through his tears, swears he sees him dancing in the flames.

 

Something else explodes at the same moment, sending debris flying everywhere. Sasuke cannot tell where the other blast comes from, too distracted by the shrapnel that cuts into his skin and sends them all flying forward. Sasuke cannot catch himself as he's flung like a ragdoll. He loses his hold on Gaara and cries out in alarm, flinging his arms desperately to pull him back.

 

White blinds them, bathing them in light. He looks at Naruto in one slow, horrifying moment—his tanned hand reaching out to Sasuke fruitlessly. He cannot form words, cannot spill his tales of love like he wants to, for the moment passes too quickly.

 

He holds his gaze until the white light overtakes them, then he's smashing into the ground and losing consciousness for the second time today.

 

Too quick. It's all over too quickly. Black ash smolders the field where Suigetsu once stood, surrounded by a sea of soldiers. Nothing remains, saved for melted guns and the crackling flames on charred bodies.

 

Quiet.

 

Everything is—

—Quiet.

 

 


	10. Crescendo

* * *

 

**Nine.**

 

_Oh, poor Atlas_

_The world’s a beast of a burden_

_You've been holding up a long time._

_And all this longing,_

_And the ships all left to rust—_

 

 _—_ What the Water Gave Me,

Florence + The Machine

* * *

 

**A.**

 

His head is propped up on something hard as a juxtaposing gentleness cards through his hair, scratching gently at his scalp in a way that makes Sasuke want to purr.

 

His eyes open slowly, surprised when there's still sight to be had within them. The light that shone right before he lost consciousness seemed bright enough to rob him of it, so he is grateful when the scenery floods into clarity around him  all at once.

 

Sasuke doesn't know where he is.

 

Or what's happened while he was out. He isn't outside anymore, instead gazing a cold, metal walls with flickering, swinging lights that cast odd shadows. He blinks, trying to understand how he got here, and his uneasy shifting causes that hand that's caressing his hair to stop short.

 

He twists his body to look up, breath catching as his eyes connect with cool blue.

 

“You're awake.” Naruto says, face breaking out into a blinding grin. Sasuke can't help but return it, overjoyed in knowing that the other man is alright.

 

 He thought — He's not sure what he thought. Too much happened before too quickly. Too much went wrong. He thought for sure that it was the end but words cannot express how glad he is that it wasn't the case.

 

“How long was I out?” He asks groggily, aware now that his head is giving off a dull ache. He's reminded of a time in his youth when he was hit in the head with a stray ball during outside time, how a pulsing throb followed him days after the initial sharp pain stopped. It's the same now as it was then, pushed to the back of his head but still ever-present.

 

“Three and a half days.” Naruto answers, surprising him. “You hit your head twice in one day. Your brain needed a break from all that rattling.”

 

He says it coolly, but Sasuke can see the relief and happiness in his face that Sasuke woke up at all. He wonders how long Naruto sat like this, holding him and listening to Sasuke breath softly. He must have stayed so close to make sure it wouldn't cease while he wasn't looking.

 

“Sorry,” Sasuke says, sitting up and pressing a hand to Naruto’s cheek. Naruto shudders around a sigh and closes his eyes. “I worried you, didn't I?”

 

Naruto nods into his palm, breathing heavily out of his nose. “Yeah.” He admits. Then softer, in a whisper: “Don't do that to me again. My heart can't take it.”

 

Sasuke smiles even though the other man isn't looking at him. He leans forward and presses a soft kiss to the other man’s lips.

 

Naruto isn't here for his gentleness though, pushing back harder and snaking his tongue into Sasuke’s mouth.

 

Sasuke’s more than happy to reciprocate, wrapping his arms tight around Naruto’s middle and pulling him closer as they kiss fervently.

 

Naruto’s splays in his lap, arms tight around his neck. He breaks away from the kiss with a near gasp, burying his head into Sasuke’s shoulder and shuddering quietly as he catches his breath.

 

“Fuck.” He says roughly. “We're alive.”

 

Sasuke nods, mouth unable to form words. He can't believe it either. Too much, too much, but they did it.

 

Didn't they?

 

“Where are the others?” He asks, suddenly aware of their absence. He's concerned that it's only the two of them in this metal box. Where is this place? Where they caught? Is this a prison?

 

No, if it were they'd be restrained or something. They also wouldn't be sharing a cell. So it has to be somewhere else.

 

“Outside.” Naruto answers, pulling back to look at him. “This is an old underground bunker we found not too far from the fortress. Fortunate too, since we had a lot of injuries.”

 

And deaths.

 

Don't forget the deaths.

 

But Sasuke won't say that since he can see the pain in Naruto’s eyes as his mind dwells on that very subject.

 

“So everyone else is fine?” He asks, choking on hope.

 

“Depends on how you define it, but yes.” Naruto confirms.

 

Sasuke swallows down something that may be a sob, nodding. He's overjoyed, truly, unspeakably relieved. Too much loss already, he can't take anymore. Thank goodness that no one else was lost while he was unconscious.

 

Speaking of the others, there's a soft knocking on the door. Naruto grunts in response and Kiba pushes the door open with his foot, holding a tray of food.

 

He's shirtless, showing off a bandage wrapped around his middle. There's a nasty cut on his forehead that already looks half healed, but beyond that he looks no worse for the wear. Sasuke takes quick stock of this, searching his form for other injuries. Kiba smiles softly at Sasuke’s obvious wellness check, pleased.

 

He doesn't so much as raise an eyebrow at Naruto sitting in Sasuke’s lap, strolling into the room and placing the food down on a small, metal table.

 

“Good to see you up, man.” Kiba says happily. Sasuke nods in response. “It was a bit touch and go there for a while.”

 

Naruto releases him and stands, taking the piece of fruit that's offered to him and biting into it like he's starving. He probably is, given how long he was sitting here. Sasuke feels a surge of love pass over him, knowing that Naruto sat watch the whole time to make sure he would wake.

 

“Sorry,” He finds himself saying again, even though he had no control over it. “I’ll try to avoid repeated head injuries in the future.”

 

Both men snort at that, rolling their eyes.

 

“Have they started yet?” Naruto asks, suddenly serious. Sasuke doesn't know what he means, confused, but Kiba shakes his head.

 

“Nah.” He replies, looking at Sasuke for some reason. “Gaara said it would be best to wait.”

 

“Started what?” Sasuke can't help but question. He doesn't know what they mean.

 

Naruto looks to him, eyes low and sad. His expression is stuttered and a bit hurt, making Sasuke’s stomach flip uncomfortably.

 

“We're having...funerals today.” He says softly. Sasuke swallowing thickly.

 

Ah. Of course.

 

For their fallen.

 

“We had to give everyone time to recover a bit before we could, and we had to make sure no one was following us.” Kiba continues for him.

 

“We also wanted to make sure you'd wake up first, you know, in case…” His voice drops off into a mutter and Sasuke understands.

 

“In case you had to have one for me, too?” He surmises. Kiba nods grimly and Naruto looks away, both clearly very uncomfortable at the thought.

 

“Gaara wants you to be there.” Naruto says softly. Sasuke raises an eyebrow, surprised. “He’s warmed up to you, and he wants us all to be together right now.”

 

“I've warmed up to him too, I think.” Sasuke admits. It's hard not to with all that's happened. Naruto looks at him from under his lashes, nodding.

 

“That's good.” He breathes. Under different circumstances he's sure the other man would be more excited about it, but they’re still weighed down by their grief and sorrow.

 

“You should eat something.” Kiba says, holding out an apple to Sasuke which he gladly takes. “Take a moment and when you're done, we can join them up above and get started.”

 

“No.” Sasuke protests, “Let's go now.”

 

He does not need to dwell on anything else, doesn't want to talk or let himself get lost in his thoughts. So, he eats quickly and readies himself to face the sun again.

 

Naruto sighs but doesn't argue with him. Sasuke’s sure that he understands, but he's also sure that Naruto’s still worried and doesn't want him to move around too fast. Three days is a long time to be unconscious, and even with their advancements he could still have some serious lasting damage.

 

He doesn't have time to worry about it now, not content to hold everyone up. Sasuke quickly finishes his food and waits for Kiba to lead the way.

 

They climb out of a hatch that's hidden in a patch of wildflowers, set in the middle of nowhere. Sasuke flinches when the sun’s rays hit him fully, raising his hand to shield his face.

 

When he lowers it, he sees the others standing there, bathed in light. They're standing in a circle, piled rocks in front of them in makeshift graves. Despite himself, a happy sigh escapes him, and Sasuke smiles.

 

Ino smiles back bright, eyes slightly red. Karin and Temari are beside her, their arm full of stones so they can't come to greet him just yet. Karin smiles softly at him as she helps build another pile, happy, while Temari nods in greeting.

 

Sai throws an arm around his shoulder and ruffles his hair, grinning.

 

“Welcome back to the land of the living, Sasuke.” He says lightly. Sasuke’s surprised. It's a rarity for Sai to use his actual name.

 

They've truly reached a deeper level of bond, then. He feels that’s the case with everyone here. Something dense. Unshakeable. Something warm and unspoken that wraps around his heart tight and squeezes it in the best way.

 

Shikamaru doesn't hesitate to pull him into an embrace when he gets close, patting his back and pressing their foreheads together. Sasuke cannot say anything but he doesn't have to, silently declaring all they need to between the heat of their skin.

 

Tenten takes his place the moment Shikamaru steps back, wrapping her arms around Sasuke’s middle as she presses a kiss to his cheek. Over her shoulder, Sasuke sees Juugo smiling at him, eyes both sad and joyful. Sasuke nods his greeting to him and isn't surprised that he gets an armful of Kimimaro once Tenten lets go.

 

He feels him shaking slightly and Kimimaro cannot form words, fingers gripping the fabric of Sasuke’s shirt so hard that it almost rips. He collects himself quickly, pulling back to smile brightly at Sasuke. It’s infectious, and Sasuke finds himself returning it.

 

“It's good to see you.” Kimimaro says, speaking what the others couldn't.

 

“Yeah.” Sasuke replies softly. “You too.”

 

They break apart and Sasuke steps forward into the circle, Naruto by his side. Gaara watched quietly the entire time, looking at Sasuke with unreadable eyes. When they make eye contact, he only nods, saying nothing.

 

He can feel the shift between them as they stand not too far apart. Still, they are still not the hugging sort. Maybe they will never get to that point, but he'll take this over what they were before.

 

“It's not much, since we aren't able to really bury them.” Tenten says, referring to the graves, “But we still want to.”

 

“It's plenty.” Gaara says quietly. Temari abandons her armful of stones to come stand beside him, leaning on his shoulder. “It's more than we were able to do before.”

 

There's more here than Sasuke was around for, more graves that will sit in this swaying field, immortalized in stone. He cannot dwell on that; cannot fathom how much more loss the others feel right now.

 

But they do not have to compare pain. He feels enough: For Sora. For Kankuro. For Suigetsu. For Shino and Choji.

 

He feels for Anko, Yahiko and Konan, even though he didn't know them. For Baki and Konohamaru and Udon and all the others— Yes, he feels enough.

 

“Yeah.” Naruto says softly, eyes downcast. Sasuke gently takes his hand, squeezing. Naruto squeezes back but doesn't look at him.

 

“Who wants to start?” Kiba asks from beside Sasuke. Everyone shares a look, unsure.

 

The wind picks up, carrying their hair towards the east. Sasuke tucks his hair behind his ear, watching the faces of all his friends as they struggle to begin.

 

After everything, this almost doesn't feel real. Almost doesn't seem like they've been afforded this moment of peace, of reflection, of mourning. It's why they can't begin, because this feels like an end.

 

The end of an era. No longer too busy to avoid their sorrow. No longer forced to keep moving and sweep it all behind them. Now, they must sit and face what has happened. What they've done. What they lost. What they've won. Now, the fight truly begins.

 

Sasuke thinks about it for a moment, before reaching out and taking Kiba’s hand, too. Kiba’s brow jumps in surprise but he takes his hand anyway, giving him a look of pure warmth.

 

The others follow suit, everyone reaching out to hold the hand next to them. They form a circle, surrounding their symbolic piles of stone and the crosses that mark them. Sasuke sighs, heart heavy but also lighter than it's ever been.

 

“I'll start.” Shikamaru says, taking the lead as he oft to do. “And after this, we'll change the world.”

 

Everyone nods, jittery and hopeful even in the face of their pain.

 

They stand there, surrounding their fallen, connected in a circle of limbs. As Sasuke stares forward while the others take turns to speak, for the first time in his life he feels...home. He feels wholly and truly—

 

—Loved.

...

 

Chaos.

 

That's only way to describe the aftermath. After they crowd around Shikamaru’s terminal, so he can do the honors; one expert keystroke sends what they know to everyone.

 

 To everyone who would care, and care they do.

 

There's calls to action, righteous outrage. Synths walk away from their posts in protest, rattled to their very bones at the knowledge of warm blood in their veins. At the thought of the children they could possibly have, upset by the notion of the lives they could have lived, if not for this widespread lie.

 

Advocacy groups sprout like bamboo; they vow to house any Synths who refuse to work until they have more answers, until they have true freedom. To feed them and care for them so they can be safe from those who don't believe them to be human, still.

 

There's arrests—high ranking officials face the guillotine for all they've done. This secret only tops the pile of their various crimes against the people of the world. Some plead innocence, some resist, some denounce this knowledge as a farce, an over-exaggeration: Not _all_ the Synths are human, only the newer models.

 

That does not ease addled minds, does not deflate the swelling anger at such injustice and abuse. Some recognize the faces of the missing Model Five’s that disappeared to be part of this secret project. They cry out for their brothers and sisters on this registry, becoming more irate once it's revealed that many of that model are dead, now absent their secret since they did not want to live a lie.

 

They learn that Ethelred was completely destroyed in that last blast. Sasuke wishes he was surprised but he's not. The man that attacked them did say his team was coming to clean up. Whatever secrets still left there now lost forever. It's hard not to mourn for those that are dead because of it, human or otherwise.

 

There's pledge of investigations, possible reparation, some easy fix to a convoluted situation. It will not come easy, such repair, as many Synths are angry—forced to live lives of servitude, forced to bite their tongues at constant abuse and dehumanization. Fighting breaks out, not easy quelled. Between those that refuse change and those that demand it.

 

It's chaos, after.

 

That's the only way to describe it.

 

Sasuke and the others see this unfold with wide eyes, caught between a strange sense of victory and loss. There is still much to be done. The world will not change overnight, and they knew this. Still, it seems to be happening faster than they thought.

 

The colonies are crying out in a fever pitch, ready for change. Their leaders are dead and they're ready for a different future. It's hard not to celebrate when so many agree with their cause and are on their side, pledging support.

 

They see each morning think piece, each afternoon denouncement of the governments by angry citizens in a haze. Sasuke’s in constant disbelief of how many are willing to stand and fight at moment's notice. He shouldn’t be so surprised; history has been cruel to many and some who have lived other horrors will be damned if they stand idle again.

 

But It does not feel real yet. He doesn't feel like this is the end, like it's that easy.

 

There's still push back and hateful humans that see them as othered despite what they’ve learned. Some do not budge on their rights of ownership no matter how strongly urged. It will be months, maybe years before synths can be truly free but this is quite the start of something...different.

 

With him and the others, they try to decide if their part is done. If they have accomplished their mission if they are not the face of this revelation, of this revolution. After all, Shikamaru sent all the information on the disks they stole anonymously, afraid of the blowback if they painted this movement in their colors.

 

They're still on the run. Still fugitives from the law. They move every few days—closer to cities this time, since it's easier to get access to the web and hear the news that echoes so loudly that it will reach them, even up here.

 

Shoulders stiff, alarm raised, constantly afraid of a sudden raid, a sudden attack by some unseen force to hold them to reckoning. It does not come; not in the first days, not after the first few weeks, and then, slowly, two months pass with nothing.

 

There's a live breaking news segment that Ino turns up after breakfast one morning, waving her hand to silence the lot of them even though they were talking in low tones. Sasuke sits up straighter, on edge. Every news bulletin in the last few weeks has been to report about more violence and riots.

 

Expected but—it's difficult to stay positive. To feel as though they're on the side of justice. Did they do the right thing? Will more bloodshed solve anything? But, what choice did they have? It was always the plan for the fire and the flood, to drag cities into the sea, so why such horror when it's revealed that some have drowned?

 

“What? What's happening?” Shikamaru asks her, staring at the static-filled television with startling intensity.

 

“I don't know,” She admits, not looking away, “But I think it's important.”

 

There are marchers, each with makeshift signs demanding justice and change. An interesting mix of humans and synths alike, old and young.

 

No, they are _Cyborgs_ now, officially. It's rude to label them as “Synthetics” when they are not. Those that were human first are Cyborgs, while the earlier models are Androids. Human-like in appearance, but ultimately not.

 

A line in the sand, a division. One that will no doubt lead to friction in the future between the Synths. The Model Two and Four’s are all machine. While the Five and Sixes are human.

 

There are more Four’s than the other models, so what does that really mean for their futures? Will the humans embrace the Androids the same way they are attempting to embrace the Cyborgs? Or, will that become a point of contention —of discrimination and distinction — too?

 

He can't think about that now. This is all way too complicated. Is it so bad to say that all he wanted out of this was to not be a slave?

 

Probably not.

 

“We demand answers!” One protester yells on screen, brandishing her posters high above her head like a weapon. There's cries in agreement, and a reporter stands off to the side, grim-faced with juxtaposing dancing eyes, excited at the scoop and front row seat she's getting.

 

“We're standing outside the Tower of Elohim, where they mysterious creator of the Synthetics lives —” She prattles on.

 

It's too early in their days of change to worry about political correctness, Sasuke think dryly, since she didn't even attempt to think differently from usual. Still content to call them an almost derogatory term. He wonders if maybe it'll be used like skin job soon, something to purposely other and attack his kind. Probably. History knows no different.

 

But _shit_ , they're going after the creator so soon? Humans sure move fast. It only makes sense to go to the source, doesn't it?

 

In the pursuit of the truth, they stormed the Bastille, landed upon beaches, wore banners emblazoned with flowers to kill their own brothers—

 

Not that it mattered.

 

For once they forced open the doors to his hold, broke past the barriers on live broadcast, they found the halls and the rooms to be empty. Devoid of any signs of life, machines long ago powered down and gathering dust. Home only to spiders and critters who dispersed amongst the shouts and clattering feet.

 

Empty.

 

The Tower of God is—

—empty.

 

“What?” Naruto breaths beside him, leaning closer to the screen. Sasuke feels just as surprised. He had not expected that. How long has this been the case?

 

It wasn't like there was much correspondence to begin with; the Tower of Elohim only emerged from obscurity when a new Model was to be released or updated, or some new hot commodity that no one could live without was to be put on the market. No one knew what that man in the tower was up to unless he wanted them to know.

 

 How long has his golden throne been bare, and how was no one aware of it? Or, was he given a heads up by someone who was?

 

“What the hell?” Kiba questions, snorting. “That was really anti-climactic.”

 

“We should have known he wouldn't have shit to say about all of this. Why would he? All this talk is cutting into his bottom line.” Shikamaru says flippantly. “Turn it off.”

 

And that's that, really. There's no more big revelations for months, no more huge calls to actions. There's still protesting and arrests, but the true work is happening behind the scenes. Laws must be drawn up, hearings must be had, anger smoothed over, so Sasuke and the others wait until something substantial happens before making any other moves.

 

They do not talk about how lost they feel. How they seem absent of purpose. Instead they choose to talk of memories, of days long passed. Sasuke learns of some of his new friends’ adventures and lives before they came here, to this land of _opportunity_.

 

It seems like such a joke now to recall that, how they all thought Delta-1 one would be different from Earth or the other colonies. Now that he has time to hear the stories he learns that it's not; all the colonies were built on lies and were just as stifled as the next. All selling dreams of a better life and profiting off of young Synths’ naivety.

 

They all compare notes and laugh at the ridiculousness of it all.

 

Some days Naruto doesn't sit with them as they reminisce. He finds a quiet corner and stares off into nothing, face blank and lost. Sasuke will quietly excuse himself from the circle and make his presence known, extending a hand that he's forever grateful to have Naruto take.

 

Most times they don't talk. Most times they sit, hand in hand, while Naruto watches the sunset and Sasuke watches his face. Most times Naruto will lean on his shoulder and Sasuke will sigh and surround him as best he can.

 

Once, and only once, Naruto turns to him—eyes sad and searching — and he asks:

 

“It was all worth it, right?”

 

Sasuke swallows heavily and nods. It was. No matter what, it was.

 

“Yes. I think so.” He replies. It's still impossible to know for sure.

 

Naruto chuckles humorlessly, turning away again. He links his fingers with Sasuke’s, squeezing. Good, he hasn't lost him to a sea of black thoughts. His love is still in there, even as he fights the waves.

 

“Yeah.” Naruto says softly. “Me too. Sometimes though...I don't know. I just wonder how I even got here.”

 

You and me both, buddy.

 

Sasuke shakes his head, looking down into his lap. His throat is tight, arms stiff and lips dry. But—all at once, he finally understands.

 

“One day you wanted to live and you did anything for the chance.” He says quietly, feeling oddly near tears.

 

Naruto looks at him then, dawning in his eyes. He heard those words before, when Sasuke himself sobbed around an explanation of who they came from. So, he just nods, squeezing Sasuke’s hand tighter before turning away once more.

 

A quiet moment that he doesn't want to end. Just the two of them in a near embrace, watching the clouds as they amble past. But a throat is cleared behind them, so they turn to see Shikamaru standing there with an odd look on his face.

 

“Sorry.” He says softly, grimacing when the two of them let go of each other and sit up straighter. “But there's something you need to see.”

 

Naruto’s brow furrows and then he's standing to follow. Sasuke does as well, horribly confused. The others are standing around, looking uneasy. Naruto squares his shoulders at the sight, taking the reins once more. His moment of reflection seems foreign when compared to the look on his face now.

 

“What is it?” He demands, swiveling his head this way and that. Everyone shifts uncomfortably, but it's Gaara who answers.

 

He turns the computer terminal around, face nothing but harsh set lines. Sasuke feels his eyebrows climb higher and higher as he comprehends what he sees. That's —

 

“It's an invitation.” Gaara confirms a moment later, expression dark. “From Red Dawn. They say we need to talk.”

 

Well, _shit_ , Sasuke thinks. What could they possibly want, after all this time?

 

Judging from the look on Naruto’s at that declaration, it can't be anything good.

 

Well, that's just _great—_

 _—_ Isn’t it?

* * *

 

 

**B.**

 

Sasuke’s feeling of dread will not disappear in the coming days, constant and buzzing and with a great sense of wrongness.

 

They decided to do it. To meet up. And Sasuke doesn't understand why.

 

What more is there to talk about? The deed is done. The truth is out. There's no purpose in a continued fight when the reins have been taken from them. They were the catalyst, but now others are content to lead the charge, hopefully to true and complete victory.

 

It does seem wrong, however, to wash their hands of it when the true battle has just begun. But what more can they do? If they come out of the shadows will they really be heroes? They exposed the truth, yes, but killed and maimed and stole and manipulated to do it.

 

Can their sins be absolved just because there's potential for a desirable outcome? Did the end justify the means?

 

—Would all their hard days

Be met with praise,

Or scorn?

 

Sasuke laments this, trying desperately not to question Naruto’s line of thinking but he thinks he's failing. He doesn't know what this Red Dawn wants. It surely is not closure, like Naruto does. Or the answer to some lingering questions.

 

They are unpredictable, unknown. He doesn't have any prior knowledge of them to go off of, seeing as how there was no record of them anywhere, mysterious as they are. So, he cannot hope to guess what they are after. So long they've gone without speaking and now they want something? It's suspicious and dangerous.

 

Sasuke voices this quietly to Naruto as they travel to the meeting place, out of earshot of the others. He doesn't want to come across like he's doubting Naruto now after everything, but he cannot hold his tongue on this matter.

 

“I know.” Naruto says. “But we don't have much choice.”

 

Sasuke raises an eyebrow, unconvinced. “How’s that?” He questions.

 

Naruto gives him an unreadable look before turning away to watch the others as they walk ahead of them.

 

“If they can still get in contact with us, then they can find us. We need to go clear the air before they do so. It's as simple as that.”

 

That answers nothing. Sasuke has no idea what that means, and it only serves to frustrate him.

 

“That's annoyingly vague and somewhat concerning.” He points out. Naruto fights down a smile and shakes his head.

 

“It is.” He agrees. Sasuke narrow his eyes and crosses his arms until Naruto relents. “Do you want the long version or the short version?” He amends with a slight look of apology.

 

Still too many secrets. Sasuke will have to chip at them little by little until he reveals the sculpture underneath.

 

“Whichever version makes sense.” He says simply.

 

Naruto nods, relenting. “Fair enough.” He replies, eyes going cloudy as he remembers. “I told you before, right? That we used to take orders from them. And that we had a falling out. Well, there's more to it than that.”

 

“Naturally.” Sasuke quips, urging him on.

 

Naruto looks at him dryly, mouth lifting into a slight smirk.

 

“Shut up. Anyway, they contacted us first, before we even had a vague sense of what we wanted to do. I don't know how they found us or knew that we were gearing up to rebel, but they did. Despite how creepy it was the deal was too good to pass up.”

 

Sasuke frowns, unnerved. How did Red Dawn find them if they weren't even on anyone's radar then? That's a bit scary.

 

“We worked together fine for a while. We talked over a secret channel they set up. Probably the most secure line I've ever seen. Shikamaru could access it from his computer and we never saw each other in person. They'd tell us drop points and we’d go to get supplies and weapons. They'd send us instructions and we'd carry them out.”

 

“Everything was fine for a long time, but then they wanted us to get reckless. Bomb cities with all civilians, take out high ranking officials in the middle of a town square.” Naruto snorts almost angrily, shaking his head at the memories. “Attack airfields and shipyards with airtight security and nearly getting us all killed.”

 

“Soon enough, it wasn't about making people pay attention to our cause and more about being as violent and destructive as possible. It felt more like all-out war rather than fighting for change. When I bought that up, I was told: what's the difference?”

 

“And you didn't like that.” Sasuke says. Not a question. He knows Naruto better than anyone.

 

“I wasn't going to be anyone's puppet. I told them I had a reason why I wanted to do this. For our freedom. For our rights. For my daughter.” He paused, swallowing. “I wasn't here to kill indiscriminately and set the worlds on fire for the fuck of it. I don't hate humans and I don't want them to needlessly suffer. They didn't seem to understand that.”

 

“So, you told them no and moved on?” Sasuke asks.

 

“Pretty much. They didn't take it well. Told us that they made us, and we wouldn't get far without them. Screwed us for a while by telling our targets that we were coming. Pretty sure that’s what happened back at the shipyard too, when I think about it. The way we got discovered was just too perfect.”

 

“But I insisted that they fuck off and leave us alone, and since we barely knew shit about them they didn't have to worry about us outing anything. They agreed, but not before telling me that I personally owed them and they would come to collect, for sure.”

 

“What does that mean?” Sasuke questions, uneasy. He already didn't like this and now he really doesn't.

 

Naruto doesn't speak for a moment, gritting his teeth. Sasuke stares at him, worried, before looking forward to make sure no one else is listening. Whatever he's going to say next, Sasuke is pretty sure the others haven't heard.

 

“I think…” Naruto starts, brow furrowing. Sasuke stares at him and waits on baited breath for him to go on. “I've been thinking about it, and the only answer I can come up with is that the people we saw at Ethelred were from Red Dawn.”

 

 _What_?

 

 “What!?” He questions a little too loudly. He sees Kiba and Sai turn to look at him in slight concern but he waves them off, dropping his voice back to a low whisper before he continues. “Are you sure?”

 

Naruto nods grimly, wringing his hands together. “I'm almost positive. We talked about going after the files with them before. Who else would have the means to launch an attack that big? Besides, I remember that fucker saying that he remembered me from somewhere, didn't he?”

 

“No, he said he remembered me.” Sasuke says, fighting down a shiver. “But I've never seen him before. I feel like I would remember that.”

 

“Me too.” Naruto agrees. “But we could have spoken before over the channel. I don't know where he would have seen you before but that just makes this even more weird.”

 

Sasuke nods, feeling panic rise in his chest but he quickly quells it. “So, we're going to confirm this? That's not all, is it?”

 

“Yeah. I think there's something bigger going on, too. They shouldn’t have been able to contact us again. Shikamaru forced them out and buried all our signatures deep. But they still messaged us, so I think they know what we've been up to this entire time. They only let us think they weren't paying attention.”

 

“Do you want to try and... smooth things over so they don't come after us?”

 

Naruto tsks, shrugging. “Maybe. We can try. I want to know what else they want and what they think we owe. They promised that today was just to talk so hopefully it doesn't go south. I just really want to know what the fuck is going on, if I'm honest.”

 

Sasuke nods, brain firing off too many thoughts at once. He hopes nothing goes wrong today as well, as he was faced with Red Dawn’s strength before. They aren’t a group to take lightly.

 

“Yeah. If this isn't going away we need to face it head on.”

 

Naruto sighs heavily, looking to the sky for answers that won't come.

 

“Why can't it just go away, though? Why does everything have to be so goddamn difficult?”

 

“I have no idea.” Sasuke admits. It's no comfort and he knows that, but he can find no other answer. “No rest for the wicked, I guess.”

 

Naruto chuckles, bumping his shoulder companionly. “Tell me about it.” He replies, shaking his head with a wry smile.

 

  * ••



 

An old plane hangar, south of where they were hiding out. About half a day's walk.

 

Naruto’s brow furrows even further, unnerved that Red Dawn picked a place easily accessed from their location. They no doubt picked it since they knew exactly where Naruto and the others were staying.

 

Naruto is probably right; they knew their whereabouts the whole time, only giving them a semblance of solitude and safety.

 

But what was the point of that? Why make them think their actions are their own, that luck was always on their side up until now, when they were still being watched and probably manipulated? They could have stepped in at any point but didn't. Did they want to see how everything would play out or did they have a different goal in mind?

 

Just what the fuck is going on?

 

Sasuke feels a stark fear before they enter, knowing he's not going to like whatever they find out inside. He sees this mirrored on everyone's faces as they near the meeting point. No one speaks. They share looks of unease and try to steel themselves as best they can.

 

“They didn't say anything about how many of us can come inside, right?” Kiba asks as they stand in front of the hangar doors. Gaara returns just then from walking around the entire perimeter, noting where the exits are.

 

Sasuke looks at him for his verdict but Gaara just shakes his head. Sasuke swallows hard, tense.

 

“No good. The other doors are sealed. This is the only way in and out.” He says, grumbling.

 

“At least that means no ambushes?” Tenten tries in vain, her cheerful tone obviously faked.

 

“Or they can bottleneck us if we have to scramble to escape.” Shikamaru rebuts helpfully, ever the optimist.

 

“So, let's not give them the chance.” Sai says, voice unusually serious. “Some of us will keep watch while the others go inside. One of us can keep their comm on so the rest can hear what's happening.”

 

Not a bad idea, Sasuke thinks. Even though something similar happened months ago, with this same setup. Not too different, since he's still facing fate. He tries not to think of how that night turned out as the sun beats down on their furrowed brows.

 

It's starting to get late and they don't want to keep the other group waiting, not sure that doing so will go in their favor. It's already about four and if they want to get back before dark they'll need to wrap this meeting up quick. If they can even do that. Either way, they need to make up their minds as fast as possible.

 

“That's the best we're going to do right now, I think.” Shikamaru says finally, nodding.

 

“Alright.” Naruto agrees easily enough. They don't really have time for a well thought out plan and he knows it. Their backs aren't necessarily against the wall but its close. No time to think anything over. They must act.

 

“I'll keep watch.” Sasuke says first, before anyone. For once, he doesn't want to be front and center to this, since he's still confused on a lot of things. It's his business at the same time it is not.

 

He wants to go inside with Naruto but thinks he'll be better suited out here, to ensure that there's no ambush or funny business.

 

Naruto seems surprised at this, but he covers it quickly with a stern nod. “Okay.” He says, and little else.

 

“I'll stay too.” Karin pipes up, Juugo soon after with: “I will, as well.”

 

Taka nods in agreement, coming to stand closer to Sasuke. He says nothing, but it looks as if he’ll be staying, too.

 

Naruto narrows his eyes slightly, still minorly distrustful of them, but he doesn't comment. Sasuke silently thanks him for being able to rely on them at a moment like this.

 

Tenten and Kimimaro also volunteer, saying that: “The six of us should be enough. Half inside and half outside.”

 

“That works, doesn't it?” Kiba asks, turning. “Naruto?”

 

“It will have to.” He confirms.

 

Sasuke catches his arm before he enters, pulling Naruto to the side.

 

“If you're going to ask me not to do anything stupid I'm going to tell you right now that I can't promise you that.” Naruto says playfully, even though his eyes are serious.

 

Sasuke, despite himself, grins. “I know. Just try to give us warning if shit’s starting to go down so we can come in, guns blazing.”

 

Naruto gives him an amused look. chuckling lowly. “Leave you out of the action? Never.” He declares, holding a hand over his heart.

 

Sasuke pulls him into a hard kiss but he doesn't linger. But, just in case—since he’s only said it outright once—he mutters: “I love you.” Against his lips and Naruto shudders at the sound of it.

 

Naruto searches his eyes, his own lowered and vulnerable. “I love you, too.” He replies, blinking rapidly before his mouth sets in a determined line. “Once this is all over we're going to go somewhere nice, alright?” He says defiantly.

 

With all the chaos going on in the known worlds, Sasuke doesn't know if anywhere will fall under that category soon.

 

But he doesn't say that, smiling brilliantly instead and saying: “Okay. It's a promise.”

 

Naruto smiles in kind, turning away to set off. The others pretend like they weren't intently listening to them, pretending to whistle innocently and hiding their soft cooing under poorly disguised coughs.

 

Sasuke rolls his eyes—fondly, of course—but it soon gives away to deep breaths and tense shoulders as the others begin to make their way inside.

 

Sasuke hears the crackle of static as someone presses down on their comm, keeping their word on having those on the outside listening in. It's silent at first; only the sound of their footfalls on concrete echoing through the earpiece.

 

Suddenly they stop short, and Sasuke and the others strain to hear what's happening while simultaneously keeping an eye out.

 

“Oh, you've _gotta_ be fucking kidding me.” Shikamaru exclaims, seemingly out of nowhere.

 

“ _Dude.”_ Kiba breaths, before cursing under his breath.

 

“What?” Tenten whispers ungently, alarmed since she can't see what's going on inside. “What's happening?”

 

She doesn't get any answer since suddenly there's another voice talking. Sasuke catches a gasp when he hears it, alarmed.

 

There's something familiar, something old and deeply embedded about that voice that it almost frightens him. He’s heard it before but can't place it. There's a sudden buzzing in his head as he combs his brain to find it, headache blooming as his blood pressure rises.

 

“Well,” The voice says grimly. “This is certainly a surprise.”

 

Sasuke hears Naruto’s sharp intake of breath and tries not to panic.

—Who?

 

“Let's not leave everyone in suspense, shall we?” Says another startlingly familiar voice. His stomach drops to the depths. The name that accompanies _that_ voice springs fourth with much more ease than the first, and Sasuke curses.

 

“Now that we know that no one's going to shoot each other, why don't we all talk together?” He sing-songs. “Tell the other little puppies that they can come in!”

 

Sasuke doesn't hesitate, sharing a hard look with Karin as she stares at him, wide eyed. She knows too, dammit, and so does Juugo. They both look confused and slightly angry, just as he is. Why is _he_ here? Just how long were they wrapped up in this without even knowing it?

 

He throws open the hangar door, stepping in from the shadows. He's tempted to raise his gun but refrains, trying not to antagonize even though he doesn't think this will be a friendly chat.

 

They charge in, incensed, but Sasuke stops short and is nearly knocked over at those rushing in behind him.

 

He's sure that his eyes bulge and his breath catches. He would stumble back and fall if not for his locked, rooted knees. He sees Naruto out of the corner of his eye, face ashen from shock. Sasuke cannot utter a word, voice dying on his tongue as he takes in what—who—he sees in front of him.

 

If he had a list of the two people he would least expect to see today, it would be them. They both look equally surprised and caught off guard.

 

Mismatched eyes of cracked marble widen and his mouth gapes. At the same time, a face—so like his own, twists in shock and old grief, and Sasuke mirrors the same.

 

“Sasuke?” Kakashi and Itachi question at the same time, incredulous.

 

 _Fuck_. He thinks.

 

And fuck again.

* * *

 

 

 **C**.

 

A gun cocks, interrupting the wary silence. Kakashi raises his hands up in surrender, not flinching away from the weapon Itachi has pressed against his temple. Sasuke gapes, jaw loose. Too quick; his brother moved from one blink to the next. He barely saw it.

 

“You know what will happen If I don’t like your answer,” Itachi says evenly, eyes positively murderous. “So, I’ll ask you once: why do you know my brother?”

 

—Brothers?

Is that what they are,

Still?

 

“Brother?” Sasuke hears Gaara whisper from somewhere nearby. He cannot be sure where—He has tunnel vision, eyes locked on the figure he hasn't seen in so long.

 

Sasuke just might be sick. Years— _centuries,_ if he's honest—wishing, waiting, wondering where Itachi could be, what he’s seen, what he experienced. All the things he wanted to tell him but couldn't, all the hope he held that one day they'd reunite and then maybe, just maybe—

 

No. He will not fall to pieces. Not now. There is no time for that. He is no longer a child, no longer lead by foolish dreams of a future that doesn't exist. He will not get doe-eyed and wistful, not when Itachi’s presence here can only mean one thing.

 

He's an enemy.

 

Sasuke may not understand much of anything at the moment, but he surely understands that.

 

 _Fuck_.

 

“Did I forget to mention that I was his commanding officer? We were supposed to be cleaning up this little mess you made but, well, _circumstances_ changed.” Kakashi says cheerfully, feigning innocence. “Sorry, it must have slipped my mind~”

 

No one speaks. Sasuke finds himself looking between the two of them; Kakashi’s ever present grin sliding wider and wider while Itachi grits his teeth just so, slowly lowering his weapon and holstering it.

 

His brother clears his throat, brushing off an imaginary speck of dust as he collects himself. He squares his shoulders and schools his face into a careful mask of nothing, all traces of his previous rage like a distant memory.

 

Such skill, to be able to suppress himself at the flip of a coin. Before, where his eyes were wild and frightening, where he was capable of anything. And now, where he's picture perfect; not a single hair out a place, cloak perm-pressed like it was painted onto him, face closed and calculating.

 

Sasuke cannot help his shiver, cannot help but compare those porcelain features to those of their father.

 

Well, some things never change.

 

“Someone needs to start talking right the fuck now.” Naruto announces loudly, breaking the silence. “You're Red Dawn?” It comes out confused, slightly hurt, and incredibly surprised — only a fraction of what Sasuke feels in the moment.

 

“Don't lump me in with those lot.” Kakashi replies, pouting. Sasuke’s fingers twitch with the urge to shoot him in his _fucking_ face. “I'm not nearly as depraved.”

 

“You're misunderstanding a few things here, Naruto.” Itachi says calmly, ignoring Kakashi.

 

He clasped his hands behind his back in what's supposed to be a relaxed stance but Sasuke knows better. He sees the slight twitching of his brother's hands but cannot discern why it's happening.

 

Maybe it's to keep himself from strangling Kakashi, like Sasuke wants to do. Or maybe he's fighting the urge to fall to his knees and reach for Sasuke, like Sasuke wants to do towards him.

 

Maybe he's projecting and Itachi doesn't want any of that. He cannot tell with the mask he wears as it's one Sasuke’s unfamiliar with.

 

The urge to vomit returns with renewed force and Sasuke tries to shift his body in the pursuit of comfort.

 

He isn't surprised that comfort has up and abandoned him.

 

—Strange.

It has something in common

With those standing here.

 

“I'm misunderstanding a lot of things here, Itachi.” Naruto echoes, eyes hard. “Maybe you should explain them to me. Let’s start with this: What the fuck? And secondly: Did you recruit us because you knew who we were?”

 

Bless Naruto and his ability to keep it together even when he's utterly flabbergasted. Sasuke can see the conflict dancing on his love’s face, can also see how he pushes past it to get what he came for.

 

Thank goodness Sasuke isn't the one who must ask the questions right now, since he can't force his mouth to move. He might have just turned tail and run if the responsibility fell to him.

 

He still might, if his legs allow. If his heart stops hammering at top speed.

 

Itachi shakes his head, mouth twisting. “No. I didn't know until a few months ago who was in your group. Even after I found out, I didn't know that you were their leader, Naruto, and I certainly didn't know that Sasuke had joined you.”

 

Really? How could he not? That doesn't make sense.

 

Sasuke hadn't realized that he spoke out loud until Itachi’s looking at him. He looks guarded and far away. Sasuke can't catch his flinch when their eyes meet.

 

“We aren't omnipresent. There's a certain level of anonymity for what we do to be successful. When the police I.D’d you, we did as well. I had my suspicions that maybe you did lead them, but I didn't know for sure.” Itachi pauses, giving Naruto a strange look. “Now I do.”

 

“I guess that's a little comforting, since you only planned to get us killed when you _didn't_ know who we were.” Kiba says angrily. “Oh wait, no it's not.”

 

Itachi chuckles, causing all of Sasuke’s little hairs to stand on end. “You say that as if I have direct control over what's been happening. Sorry to disappoint but I don't: I'm an underling, just like you.” He replies. Kiba sucks his teeth and crosses his arms, saying nothing.

 

“So, where's your boss?” Naruto asks impatiently. “I’m tired of being played with and I want some answers.”

 

“He’s otherwise occupied.” Itachi answers, eyebrow raising in a way that almost seems amused. “I'm perfectly capable of answering any questions you have.”

 

—How could you?

Is all Sasuke wants to ask.

But he doesn't,

And he won't.

 

“What do you want?” Naruto asks gruffly.

 

“To thank you.” Itachi replies simply.

 

Sasuke sees the look of confusion that flutters across everyone’s faces. Some even look to him like he could possibly know what Itachi means. He shrugs, just as lost.

 

“For what?” Ino asks carefully.

 

Itachi smiles slowly, wide like the Cheshire cat. Sasuke hates that look; haughty and knowing, like he's dealing with ignorant children. Like they're putty in his hands.

 

“For your part. You've made things much easier and don't even know it.”

 

Sasuke feels frustration building. He doesn't want the run around and he knows the others don't either. He finally finds the courage to speak up, ready to rip his brother a new one, but it's Kakashi who speaks next, cutting him off being he gets the chance to speak.

 

“What my vague friend is trying to say is you've jump-started the revolution.” Kakashi says, positively beaming. “Mazel Tov!”

 

Sasuke blinks, brow furrowing. He cannot help the incredulous: “What?” That slips out at the odd man’s declaration. “What revolution?”

 

Itachi turns to him, eyes revealing nothing.

 

“Were you all foolish enough to think we wanted peace with the humans? That they would give us freedom if we simply asked?” Itachi tuts, shaking his head.

 

Nothing as simple as that, but they didn't plan for all out war. That's for sure.

 

“That was never the plan. We must take what we want, and take we did.” He informs. Something black begins to swirl around in Sasuke’s gut, something black and foreboding. He cannot give it a name, but it threatens to overtake him in the face of his brother’s uncaring visage.

 

“What the hell does that mean?” Shikamaru asks, mouth twisting into a deeper frown. He can sense it too; something is wrong. Very wrong.

 

Itachi sends a look over to him but doesn't linger. He chooses instead to address Sasuke directly, dropping pretense. This was always going to be a conversation between the two of them.

 

Everyone has faded to the background anyway, so it makes no difference who his eyes are focused on.

 

“We have almost complete control of the colonies.” He says simply, surprising them all. “We've been slowly taking them over for months. Years, even. This was the last holdout, beside Earth, and with everything that was found and released from Ethelred, we have just the leverage we needed for an all-out assault.”

 

Itachi smiles brightly, contrasting the dead look in his eyes. “Thanks to your efforts.”

 

Fuck.

 

“So, you used us? Made us do your dirty work without even knowing it?” Sasuke finds himself spitting angrily. He feels his heart rising, fingers twitching with the urge to—

 

—Nothing.

He’ll do nothing.

Since that's what their efforts

Truly amounted to.

 

“Not intentionally.” His brother says, ignoring his anger, “We were going to kill your entire team. We’ve done it before, if you’re wondering. We employ small groups to act under our banner and martyr them in the eyes of the people when we feel they've done enough. It inspires the regular Synths, makes them sympathetic to our cause.”

 

“But this time was different. You all were not just mindless and angry. You all had purpose, so we realized that your survival could work in our favor. The revelation of our human origins would convince many of our kind to stand and fight. And fight they will. So, we let your carry out your plan as it produced favorable results.”

 

He pauses, voice dropping lower, dripping with sincerity that Sasuke _hates_.

 

“Please understand: that was well before I knew you were amongst their ranks. If I'd known, I would have never considered it.”

 

Is that supposed to make him feel better? That's even worse, in his opinion.

 

“So, if I wasn't involved in this it'd be perfectly fine to kill everyone here?” Sasuke asks with a disbelieving snort. “You're insane.”

 

Itachi doesn't respond to that, not with words. He only sighs and looks away.

 

“So, what, all this to kill some humans? That's what you want?” Naruto grunts. He's upset, but Sasuke can see the shadows of horror form behind his wall of anger.

 

They played right into their hands. All they did in hopes for peace, ultimately became the setup for war. A hard pill to swallow, a hard cross to bear. Sasuke feels regret grip at his insides with long, sharp claws.

 

“All this to reshape the world.” Itachi retorts. “Simply put: we will not lay down and take it any longer. We’re stronger than them, and it’s time to take control.”

 

“So, genocide? Is that what I'm hearing?” Sai asks, looking to everyone wildly.

 

Itachi doesn't have to answer. The implication is strong enough. He's still going to. The fucker always did like hearing himself talk.

 

“If it comes to that. We've already formed camps that we've allowed the non-violent humans to live in. Until we have complete control of all the colonies, for those that wish to oppose us it's surrender and die. There are no other options.”

 

“Don't you mean ‘surrender _or_ die’?” Karin asks carefully, frowning.

 

Itachi tilts his head to the side, smiling knowingly and raising an amused brow, but ultimately saying nothing.

 

Sasuke can't stand this.

 

He doesn't know this man in front of him, is sickened by the filth spewing from his mouth. He doesn't know what to do. Or, he does, but he doesn't know if he can carry it out. But he’ll damned if he doesn't try.

 

His fingers twitch again, ready, but Gaara’s hand snakes out to grip his wrist before he can make a move.

 

“Don't.” Gaara says quietly, startling him. He doesn’t take his eyes off of Itachi, only squeezing Sasuke’s wrist tighter. “It doesn't matter what he is. He's your brother; you'll never forgive yourself.”

 

He's absolutely right, even though Sasuke desperately wishes that he wasn't.

 

Itachi watches them, eyes downcast and almost...sad?

 

“Would you kill me, Sasuke?” He asks, causing Sasuke to suck in a harsh breath. “I don't expect you to understand. I wouldn't, in your position.” Then, quieter: “This wasn't how I expected to explain all of this to you.”

 

“How could you possibly explain this in a way that's not fucked up?” Naruto exclaims, stepping forward in front of Sasuke like some sort of shield. “This is insane, Itachi! You're talking about holding people in internment camps and killing off humans that oppose your newly formed regime! Why are you okay with this!?”

 

“I did not say it was right, but it's better than the alternative.” Itachi fires back, eyes hard. “I’ve learned to live with it, just as you will.”

 

That answers nothing. Explains nothing. Sasuke cannot reconcile the brother he knew with the monster in front of him. His brain sticks on the last thing his brother said, about how he didn't plan for them to reunite like this. What did he mean?

 

“How did you plan to explain it to me?” Sasuke asks, cutting off whoever was going to speak next. He doesn't know why he needs to know the answer to that, but he does.

 

Itachi stares at him, blinking slowly. He looks away from Sasuke’s imploring eyes, like he can't stand them.

 

“I told you, didn't I? That you'd find your reason to live. I found mine long ago.” He says softly. “I wanted us to be able to explore the stars together like you always dreamed. But as free men, not tethered as we are.”

 

Oh.

 

No. That's not fair. He cannot spin this around and say that it was all for him. Sasuke will not let him. His actions were his own and Sasuke will be damned if he takes the blame for such twisted fantasies.

 

“Do you really think I lost sight of you, all this time?” Itachi asks him. “You know me better than that. I was always looking out for you, always working towards a better life for you.”

 

Bullshit! “No. You left. And if you supposedly knew what I was up to then you would have known that I found Naruto again. So, I'm not going to fall for that. You know me better than that.” He retorts, echoing his words.

 

But it's probably true. Naruto and the others kept track of him as well but he still surprised them by appearing here. It could be a similar situation since he didn't act as everyone thought he would.

 

He sees Kakashi standing behind his brother, giving Sasuke an odd, knowing look.

 

 _“No one raindrop thinks it caused the flood_.”

 

He mouths, grinning at Sasuke’s stricken look.

 

“You're right. I should have known, but my informant regretfully left out that tidbit of information.”

 

“Informant?” Naruto echoes, eyes growing suspicious and calculating. “Who?”

 

Itachi smiles at him. No teeth, just a mocking crinkling of his eyes that sets them all on edge.

 

“Not any of your men.” He assures. “Not originally, anyway.”

 

What?

 

Sasuke doesn't understand. Who else would have been close enough to watch him? There's no one, no one who had direct contact with his daily comings and goings, who could have steered him in the directions Itachi wanted. There's no one who—

 

_—“See?”_

_The big man says._

_“Green.”_

 

“I would say who, but from the look on your face, I'd say you already figured it out.” Itachi says, eyes sharp and slightly mocking. “He got a little too fond of you but that's understandable. I can't blame him for that; you're quite charming. So, I'll forgive that slip. Just this once.”

 

Isn't he just? To think he felt so insignificant when all these paths lead back to him, one way or another. A tangled web woven without ever knowing it.

 

He doesn't know how to feel. Too much. Too much at once. His brother's a homicidal maniac—and if he’s hearing correctly, a soon-to-be genocidal maniac—and one of the only people he felt even slightly close to back home only befriended him under said brother's order.

 

There's blood in his mouth from god knows where. He probably cracked a tooth, somehow, due to all the pressure building as he forces himself not to explode.

 

Naruto watches him, brow furrowed in concern. He doesn't know what Sasuke knows, that much is certain, but he can see how much its upsets him to his core.

 

“Since we patiently sat through your villain monologue,” Shikamaru interjects, eyes on Sasuke as well. Despite his snark, he looks conflicted and upset, like he's not sure what to do.

 

A common theme, lately.

 

Sasuke’s grateful someone else cut in. He’s at the end of his rope and ready to start throwing blows.

 

“Tell me: what now? You just brought us here just to rub it in our faces? That seems beneath you.”

 

“No,” Itachi replies. “I didn't come to gloat. I came to offer you an invitation to the side of the victor or your freedom. That's our thank you for a job well done. Join us or stay out of the way. We'll allow that also.”

 

“And if we choose neither?” Naruto says, jutting his chin out defiantly. Sasuke should have known he wouldn't take this lying down. It can't be over just like that. All their efforts, just for...this? He won't be dramatic and say that it's a fate worse than death, but it's certainly close.

 

“Then you'll die.” Itachi says around a casual shrug. It's nothing to him, and Sasuke feels bile rush up once more as it threatens to spill over his tightly pursed lips.

 

Who _are_ these people, this Red Dawn, to have radicalized his brother so thoroughly? His caring, empathetic, beautiful brother—turned into an empty caricature of himself. If Sasuke didn't know any better, he'd think that he was glaring at Itachi’s clone right now.

 

Not quite right.

 

Not all there.

 

But his gut says that it’s not. This is the real deal, and in this moment, he _hates_ him. Hates that he ever mourned his departure, that he ever cried himself to sleep, forlorn and afraid of what could be happening to his brother in his absence. Bad things, apparently. Very bad things.

 

He wants to find the people that twisted him so well around their cause like barren, winding branches and rip them limb from limb.

 

Sasuke’s not sure when he'd be able to do this, or how, but he's set his mind to it. Creates a blood pact with himself, swears to God for the first time in his life that he'll do everything he can to destroy them.

 

It might take years, centuries, but he _swears._

 

But not now. It would do them no good to strike now, not when it's expected. Not when he's raw and jumbled. When he has his wits about him once again, he'll make a plan.

 

“But personally, I'd rather it not come to that.” Itachi continues. “You've done your part. I even took the liberty to clear your names so you're free to go wherever you wish and no one will bother you, as long as you keep your heads down.”

 

“You—” Naruto begins, taking a step forward. Temari stops him with a well-placed hand on his forearm.

 

“Naruto,” She says seriously. “Maybe we should listen to him.”

 

“What?” He replies, shocked. “Are you crazy? He—”

 

“We did what we said we would, right?” She urges. “This isn't our fight. If they're giving us an out I think we should take it.”

 

Then, softer: “We've lost enough, haven't we?”

 

Naruto stares at her, speechless. There’s really nothing to be said when all the faces behind him are in various states of agreement, albeit begrudgingly.

 

“I hate to agree but,” Sai says, looking defeated. “This is obviously much bigger than us. I'm not sure we want to get involved when we _just_ made it out of the fire and flame.”

 

“You know I'm with you no matter what,” Gaara says, eyes low, “But don't ask me to take on this fight.” Naruto’s stark look of betrayal causes the other man to look away, ashamed.

 

Sasuke doesn't want to say what he's thinking right now, but it's unfortunately close to their line of thinking. He never had plans to make a career out of freedom fighting. He wanted to finish this and then go somewhere nice, if he’s honest. Away from Earth, away from his shitty life, away from his responsibilities. He wanted to hop on a ship and disappear into the void with Naruto, if fate would allow.

 

Is it morally wrong to be willing to leave the colonies in the hands of madmen, at least for the time being? To leave the humans to their fates while they pretend they don't see? When they had a hand in making things worse? Absolutely. But no one ever said they were pillars of righteousness.

 

Sasuke’s nobody's hero.

 

And given who they’re up against —just a glance at the power they could face if they decide to fight Red Dawn—Sasuke’s certain he does not want to be.

 

Not to mention that this opportunity served to them is too good to pass up. If Itachi’s words ring true then their names have been cleared, their slates clean. They can go anywhere and do everything—something that was but a pipe dream just mere hours ago—and all it takes is some willful ignorance?

 

If that makes him a coward, well, he'll live with that. As long as he gets to live.

 

For once.

 

“The tribe has spoken.” Kakashi announces, lowering his voice for dramatic effect. Many heads swivel to look at him, incensed.

 

“And who are you supposed to be?” Kiba asks angrily, gesturing rudely. “You've stood there quiet while he went on and on about world domination and shit, so what's your part in all this?”

 

A good question, one Sasuke really wants the answer to. If he's not a part of Red Dawn, then who is he?

 

“Testy.” Kakashi says around a grin. Sasuke’s five seconds away from shooting him between the eyes, but then Kakashi’s speaking again. “I'm just an observer. I'm here to see how this all plays out.”

 

“You get your orders from somewhere, don't you?” Tenten asks, looking at him like he's insane.

 

She's not wrong.

 

“Of course I do.” He says proudly. “Orochimaru wants to see what his creations are capable of, but that's hard to when you're locked in a tower 24/7. He needs eyes on the outside and that's where I come in.”

 

What?

 

“You're saying you...spy on us for the man who made us?” Ino asks slowly, eyes narrowed in thought.

 

“Your parents made you! Jeez, have you even been paying attention?” Kakashi replies with mock outrage. “Orochimaru perfected you; there's a clear distinction.”

 

That's a very strange way to look at it. Arrogant too, since he only “improved” upon pre-made designs in their case. Can it truly be called improvement when all they have to show for it is suffering?

 

“He's curious to see how this revolution will turn out. The last one didn't go so well, but times have changed. The number of Synths almost rival that of natural born humans so who knows what will happen. And before you think he's encouraging war, he's not. Like a true benevolent god, he's leaving his creations to their own devices.”

 

“I'm losing my fucking mind.” Kiba mutters, eyes skyward. There's way too much to process here, dumped on them all at once. It will be days before Sasuke can sort through all of the thoughts going through his head.

 

“The tower was empty, though.” Shikamaru points out, a strange look on his eye that Sasuke can't hope to decipher. “So, where is he?”

 

Kakashi smiles cryptically, tilting his head. In that moment Sasuke swears his eyes look golden.

 

“Where indeed?” Kakashi questions, winking at Sasuke’s bewildered face.

 

There's something in the back of his head, something itching to escape. Temari said it once, didn't she? That her father experimented with transferring consciousnesses or something? Could he have learned that from someone?

 

It couldn't be, could it? Sasuke doesn't have the chance to fully form the thought before Kakashi’s speaking again, golden glint absent from his gaze.

 

“Are we done here?” He asks. “I only came to get an update from Itachi about the current proceedings and meet the men of the hour. It's been fun but we all have other places to be.”

 

“Go.” Itachi says, waving him off. “I've had enough of you to last a lifetime.” Kakashi looks at Sasuke again, smiling creepily.

 

“It's such a shame, you know? I feel like we could have had fun together.” Itachi bristles at that while Sasuke takes a wary step back. “But before I go, is _no one_ going to comment on how there’s two Sasuke’s present? Must I do everything myself?”

 

“Obviously I'm his clone, dumbass.” Taka retorts, tired of holding his tongue. He looks as exhausted as Sasuke feels. Sasuke, despite himself, feels a smirk bubbling before it ultimately dies out.

 

“Another unfortunate side effect of the corrupt government on Earth.” Itachi says calmly. “Can you not see why our intervention is necessary?”

 

“How about you go with him?” Naruto says tersely, expression revealing that he's just about had it. “We have nothing more to talk about, right?”

 

“Is that what you believe, Naruto, or are you trying to make your minions happy?” Itachi questions, raising his eyebrow.

 

“Fuck you.” Sasuke answers for him. It's nicer than what Naruto would have said, anyway. “Just go.”

 

Itachi looks at him, face conflicted. He doesn't have the right to look like that, like he's sad at their estrangement and upset that Sasuke could possibly be angry with him. He has every right to curse his name to the depth of hell and he plans to do so as soon as he can catch a fucking break!

 

“I know you won't agree with me, but it was good to see you, Sasuke.” He says. He’s right; Sasuke **does** **not** share that sentiment. “You’re upset, but I'll offer you a seat beside me regardless. When you're willing to listen, come find me. I’ll leave a hint somewhere only you can find.”

 

“I'm good, thanks.” Sasuke replies immediately, purposely moving to stand next to Naruto. “I want nothing to do with you.”

 

“This is the worst family reunion ever.” Kakashi says quietly from his place by the door.

 

He's not wrong.

 

“Before I forget,” Itachi says, struggling to keep his composure in the face of Kakashi’s ridiculousness. “I understand that you came across one of my colleagues back at the fortress, did you not?”

 

Naruto and Sasuke share a look, their suspicions confirmed. Itachi nods at their wordless acknowledgement, sighing deeply.

 

“And what of it?” Naruto asks, guarded.

 

“Nothing. The matter is closed.” At Naruto’s raised eyebrow, Itachi continues, face strangely dark. “Hidan’s actions were out of turn and uncalled for. I thought you'd like to know that I’ve...disciplined him thoroughly. That's all.”

 

Gaara’s face contorts, struggling not to speak at the implication. Unfortunately—or fortunately, depending on how you look at it—revenge was robbed from him just as his own brother was.

 

“Not to look a gift horse in the mouth,” Naruto says sarcastically, sneering around his words. “But why do that? Is senseless murder no fun when you're not the one doing it?”

 

Itachi ignores the jab, saying nothing. It's Kakashi who answers for him, grinning with a knowing look.

 

“Oh, you haven't heard? Itachi gets all cute and protective when his baby brother is involved. It's the only time he has a heart!”

 

Sasuke can't help the way his own heart _thumps_ at that, strangely touched even though the feeling that ultimately wins out is disgust.

 

“Gross.” Sasuke says simply, staring at Itachi with all the hate he can muster.

 

Where was this protectiveness years ago, when Itachi left him in the middle of the street to rot? When Sasuke was drowning on his own, lonely and afraid, desperate for the only person who truly knew him best?

 

He doesn't want it now, not when everything's all wrong. He doesn't want to be Itachi’s main focus, not if it means _this._

 

“I'll take my leave then.” Itachi says, face blank. If he was at all bothered by what Sasuke said he doesn't show it. “Remember what I said: stay out of our way and we'll leave you be. It's a simple as that.”

 

“Got it.” Naruto says gruffly, staring daggers. Itachi nods to him and, with one last wistful look in Sasuke’s direction, he disappears back into the wilderness with Kakashi on his heels.

 

Silence.

 

No one moves. No one says anything. All Sasuke can hear is the pounding of his own blood in his ears.

 

It's not over though, not by a long shot. Even if the feeling swirling around them has the palpable taste of defeat. They must take this loss as it is until they have the strength to do otherwise.

 

Judging from the expressions on the faces around him, Sasuke can see clearly that it won't be any time soon.

 

“Shouldn't you go after him, Juugo?” Sasuke finds himself saying without turning around. “You're on his payroll, aren't you? There's nothing left for you here.”

 

He hears a sharp intake of breath from behind him and then Karin’s eyes shine bright with realization before she's exclaiming: “Wait, he was talking about _you?_ I thought for sure he meant Suigetsu!”

 

That would have made it easier, wouldn't it? Maybe. It would be hard enough to feel betrayed by a dead man who can't answer his questions any more than he could draw breath. No, he's stuck with the living—the living who looks at him with sad eyes and a broken expression like the world's crashing down around him.

 

“Sasuke—” He starts to say, but no, that's not allowed. Not anymore. No more explaining the _why_ of it all. Everyone is shitty. End of story. He won't be swayed by lies or half-truths that Juugo’s no doubt going to tell him.

 

“Shut up.” Sasuke grunts roughly. He can't even see straight in the rage that follows.

 

“Forgive me, I shouldn't have agreed to it. I never told him anything that could have put you in danger —”

 

That's as far as he gets before Sasuke whirls around on his heel and knocks him out cold.

 

The others watch, silent like the dead. Sasuke doesn't look up for a long while, watching Juugo lay out on the concrete.

 

He feels like he's aged twenty years in the last hour. There can be no more revelations today, no more secrets and lies, for surely his heart will burst if he has to accept one more fucked up thing that he has no hope of controlling.

 

“Jesus.” Karin whispers softly, wiping a hand over her face. Sasuke finally drags his eyes up to look at her and her gaze is apologetic. Not her fault. She didn't know. He still has no idea what to say to her, now or ever again.

 

 _‘And then there was one.’_ Springs to mind.

 

“What should we do with him?” Kiba asks lowly, shuffling his foot.

 

Sasuke sees the stress on all their faces. He doesn't want to do anything to add to it so he won't voice what his fury directs him to do.

 

“I don't know.” He says honestly. Would it be strange to cry right now? It feels like a perfectly normal response but he doesn’t feel like testing waters. “I'm tired.”

 

“Leave him.” Naruto says tersely. “He can figure out his next move on his own.”

 

That's good. Juugo’s fate can be left to chance. Sasuke doesn't feel like playing judge, jury, and executioner. He doesn't feel like doing much of anything, right now.

 

Except maybe lay down in the dirt and let the elements reclaim him.

 

“Let's get the hell out of here.” Shikamaru says, positively flummoxed. “We can talk about this more later but I—I don't know. Fuck.”

 

“ _Fuck_ is right.” Sai mutters. “I would say it can't get any worse but it already has, hasn't it?”

 

“I think I need to lay down.” Ino says, looking faint.

 

“C’mon, let's go.” Naruto says quietly, leading the way.

 

The various states of distress that flutter over stricken faces would almost be funny to Sasuke if he wasn't so close to mental breakdown, himself.

 

“What now?” Kimimaro asks no one in particular as they walk away.

 

Kiba purses his lips, Naruto sighs, Gaara crosses his arms, eyes downcast while Temari looks off into the distance.

 

Shikamaru scratches his head with grimace as Sai blows frustrated raspberries. Tenten shuffles her foot, Karin clicks her tongue, Taka says nothing, as usual, but his scowl says enough.

 

And Sasuke? Well, Sasuke says what everyone's thinking. Too overwhelmed by the day’s events to sugarcoat it, he grunts:

 

“Fuck if I know.”

 

With that, at least, everyone seems to be in agreement.

 


	11. Destinations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We made it to the end! Thanks to everyone who stuck this out with me!

* * *

 

**Ten.**

 

_Good God, under starry skies,_

_We are lost!_

_Into the breach we got tossed!_

_And the water's coming in fast!_

 

—Ship to Wreck,

Florence + The Machine.

* * *

 

**A.**

It's not bad to be programmed, in Sasuke’s opinion.

 

Because if he was, maybe he wouldn't be caught up in a terrible situation with no clear solution.

 

For a long while—once they return—no one speaks. There's no more to be said. Too much regret, too much anger, too much uncertainty and doubt. No one knows where they stand in the grand scheme of things and no one knows what to do next.

 

Days pass, and finally there's some quiet stirring in their hold, restless from the days of addled silence.

 

Those that speak do so in hushed whispers; small groups with aligned thinking and similar vices.

 

Those that don't do so absent company; they occupy cold corners or abandoned rooms where the draft’s settled in.

 

A strange sense of discord occupies them, born from stark differences of opinion. Sasuke knows that Naruto doesn't think their duty done; they simply can't leave things as they are. Not if they ever want to sleep right again.

 

He also knows that there aren't many here that share that sentiment, anymore.

 

The others are tired—weary from wars that took place long before this one. Exhausted from constant suffering, old and new. It'll be hard to convince any of them that continued resistance is the right thing to do. Not when, despite everything they've learned, they still won in the loosest of senses.

 

Champions of the just they made themselves out to be—on the side of righteousness and on the path to change. But they were wrong, weren't they? Too naive to see that the world would not change at the flip of a switch, that some would not want peace as they do.

 

There was always going to be blood and war—that is what history has taught so many times before. They deluded themselves into thinking they could rewrite the pages with different colored ink, when all they've done is tear out a few to twist the narrative.

 

Now they will see what pride had wrought.

 

Restless at their inaction, Naruto gives them a choice. Everyone is allowed to decide for themselves what’s next—absent anger or judgement—but they need to decide soon. The coming months will be important if they have a chance at stopping anything Red Dawn has planned.

 

The whispers become louder. Heard in the dead of night. Sasuke ignores most of them—he does not want to pry or overhear something he shouldn't, content to wait until everyone is comfortable revealing their intentions.

 

He knows where he stands, anyway. It doesn't matter what he has to do or where he has to go, as long as Naruto is beside him. Sasuke cannot lie and say that he doesn't crave a moment of rest, but he'll follow wherever the other man leads, and he’ll be wholly content to do so.

 

Finally—on the seventh day, when the noonday sun starts to climb high in the sky — it's Temari who speak first.

 

They're all in a loose circle after breakfast. The television plays idly in the background; old news rolls across the screen in a lazy scrawl. The uprisings are all anyone talks about these days and today is no different. There's still no word about Red Dawn being behind any of it, which is unnerving.

 

Somehow, it's also solace. None of this feels real yet—like a dream or the worst-case scenario cooked up in anxious isolation— but Sasuke’s sure the minute those maniacs finally step into the spotlight things are going to get much, much worse.

 

Temari sighs, rubbing her hands across her knees and closing her eyes. Naruto looks up from his book to silently regard her, face revealing nothing.

 

“We've decided to go home.” Temari says quietly, eyes downcast.

 

Naruto gently closes his book to face her fully. Sasuke feels himself draw tense like something is about to happen. He's not sure what but he's wary of it. He sees Kiba do the same; he abandons his intense game of chess with Kimimaro to listen to their conversation, finger frozen right before he moved his next piece.

 

The steady tapping from Sai’s foot stops abruptly and he watches the proceedings from the side of his eyes, face carefully blank.

 

It feels like they're watching a bomb as its being defused rather than a conversation between friends.

 

Sasuke isn't sure what to make of that.

 

“We?” Naruto asks without looking away from her. Gaara flinches mutely regardless, sitting up straighter in his seat. Shikamaru does the same with a hastily cleared throat, eyes darting between the two of them. Sasuke feels his brow jump in slight surprise. Ah.

 

“Gaara and I.” Temari says without blinking.” And Shikamaru as well.”

 

Sasuke isn't blind; even as his eyes are constantly fixed on Naruto they see enough out of their corners. Sees whose stare lingers, the secret smiles and the batting eyelashes. They think themselves subtle, but it's hard to ignore such coupling when the walls are woefully thin.

 

Which means Naruto isn't blind to it, either. Carefully observant at the best of times, he must have seen this coming from a mile away. That's apparent from the way his face doesn't change. Not even in the slightest. No secret swirling void behind his eyes, no bitter twist of the lips. Just simple, easy acceptance from the looks of it.

 

Well, he was always good at a poker face.

 

Naruto nods, swinging his feet from over the side of the chair and clasping his hands in front of him. “Home is Lennox, isn't it?” He asks.

 

“It is.” Temari confirms.

 

Naruto purses his lips slightly in thought, looking away. “That’s...far.” He replies.

 

Temari shifts uncomfortably, saying nothing. Gaara jumps in, voice slightly hurried.

 

“Our father still lives.” He says, making Naruto’s face color in surprise. “We were thinking that maybe he could—” He doesn't finish, face twisting with words unsaid. He comes to stand closer to Naruto, opening his palm to reveal a lovingly tied lock of hair—dark brown and very familiar.

 

At Naruto’s look of confusion, he continues.

 

“It's Kankuro’s.” Gaara says around a sigh. “We keep these for each other just in case.”

 

Ah.

 

That's understandable, given what their father can do.

 

“Okay.” Naruto says after a moment, swallowing thickly.

 

There's no arguing with that, is there? If there's the slightest chance that Kankuro could be returned to them they have to take it, don't they? Naruto wouldn't dare demand otherwise. Not when the stakes are so high and there's hope to be found elsewhere.

 

“If it can be done, I'll do it.” Gaara says seriously. “And then I'd do my best to come back.”  Naruto smiles softly at him, nodding. He's visibly pleased at Gaara’s vow, loose as it is, and that's enough for Sasuke to let go of his lingering bitterness towards the man.

 

There's no point holding onto it anyway. He has the distinct feeling that they'll all be seeing much less of each other very soon. It will not end with these three. Their watch has ended and now it is time for their freedom to pull them in separate directions.

 

Still, Sasuke cannot pretend that he doesn't want to find another farm somewhere out in the plains for them all to till together. A simple life, away from it all, taking comfort in each other and healing their wounds one day at a time. A sweet fantasy, one that almost has his fighting down tears as he feels the ground start to shift.

 

But they can't and they won't, since everyone's idea of freedom is different. Rougher and harder than his, at the moment. Life like that will never be enough, not while their blood sings and their legs itch to run.

 

—Still,

It's nice to dream,

Isn't it?

 

“I won't.” Temari says, holding Naruto’s gaze. “We saw through our purpose to come and now we're without a reason to stay. I won't risk my life to help humans. I just can't.”

 

“I know.” Naruto replies, looking a bit disappointed. He won't argue; he knows more about Temari’s past than Sasuke does and despite the obvious hang-ups, she must have more solid reasoning to withhold her aid in the face of what's to come.

 

Sasuke tries his best not to be critical. He has way too many lingering ghosts and rotting skeletons in his closet to judge hers. Or anyone's. That any of them are still standing upright after everything they've seen—here and elsewhere—is a feat itself.

 

“I just don't know.” Shikamaru says, nearly huffing. “I think I need a break. At least for a little while.” When he looks at Naruto they hold each other’s gazes for a long time, a silent conversation that would otherwise take hours happening in mere moments.

 

It's different between them. Not to say that the bonds with Gaara and Temari aren't strong, but this is _Shikamaru_. There are parts of him that are permanently embedded within Naruto. Within Sasuke. Within Kiba and Tenten and Ino. Within the ones that came first.

 

All those years they spent in blissful comradery. All those years where they laid on the floor in silence, breathing the same air, fingers entangled and whispering their dreams to one another.

 

Sasuke remembers their old faces—without the worry lines and the creases from frowns—the boom of their laughs, much quieter these days. Remembers when they were absent of these demons that haunt them—when their eyes were bright with love and togetherness. It was painful enough to let that go the first time and now here they are again.

 

Except this time it doesn't ring with finality. There’s hope, some foolish belief that they will see each other again. Sasuke will hold tight to that, keep it close to his heart when the night grows dark once more. Things are different. However good or however bad, they're different. When the time comes, they'll meet again.

 

So even if Sasuke’s heart is beating too fast and his palms are clammy, even if Ino’s biting her lip sadly and Kiba’s crossing his arms and looking away, even if Tenten’s eyes are wide like the moon and her fist is clenching—even still, it isn't the end.

 

When Shikamaru looks to him, eyes vulnerable and full of sorrow, Sasuke smiles. Lays himself bare with just his eyes, doesn't let the moment pass without feeling like he hasn't done or said enough. It's different with Shikamaru. He doesn't have to.

 

“For a little while, then.” Naruto echoes. “I'll hold you to that. I'm getting really tired of saying goodbye.”

 

“So am I.” Shikamaru replies with a weak grin. He stands and holds a hand out for Naruto to shake. Sasuke will pretend that he doesn't see that the both of them are shaking ever so slightly.

 

“I said I'd follow you and I meant that.” Shikamaru continues. “Even when you're most definitely going to get yourself killed.”

 

“I wouldn't be me if I wasn't constantly doing something stupid.” Naruto quips, grinning like he used to.

 

“And I wouldn't be me if I didn't ruin the mood.” Sai says, shrugging. Everyone looks to him and he cringes, scratching the back of his head sheepishly.

 

Naruto’s smile falls and his eyes hood. He looks at Sai and sighs, asking: “You too?”

 

Sai shuffles his feet, looking downward. He looks serious, face hollow and tired. There's something off about his gaze today, something wrong and uneven. It seems those horrors he buried to keep himself together have finally sprouted roots.

 

“You know me, don't you?” Sai asks him. When Naruto nods, he carries on. “You know I've been at this a lot longer than all of you. I don't feel like getting into all of that right now but I'm with Shikamaru on this. I need a break.”

 

No one says anything, so he sighs heavily and continues.

 

“Not forever. I have absolutely no problem being the resistance. It’s where the fun is and we can't just let them run wild, right? But, right now, I think I won't be any help to you. I need some time to...work some shit out and see the world, or something. Never got the chance before and with our names being cleared we can go just about anywhere. I'd beat myself up forever if I passed that up.”

 

“That's fair.” Naruto says, shaking his hand as well. Sasuke bites down disappointment. He didn't think Sai would cut out so early. Like Sai said, he loves the fun and the action. But Sasuke completely understands the need to escape their grim reality if only for a moment. Chances like these don't appear too often and they should take full advantage of them.

 

Their ranks are dropping like flies, though. He can't help but feel sad about it.

 

Ino throws her hair over her shoulders, making a show of looking at her nails. She sneaks a look at Naruto, jumping slightly when she sees that he's already looking at her.

 

“You can say that you're going with him.” Naruto says, face amused. “It's alright.”

 

“It's really not.” She replies mournfully, pursing her lips.

 

“It is.” Naruto insists. Sasuke can't tell if his smile is forced or not. “You have a right to be happy. We all do.”

 

“How can I be happy when we're splitting up?” Ino asks, stepping forward for a hug. “I guess it was stupid to think we'd be together forever.”

 

Naruto doesn't answer but Ino didn't expect him to. They stand there in a stiff embrace as Sasuke watches uncomfortably, reminded of something he didn't want to think about.

 

 _Did you really think you’d be able to stay with your friends forever?_  

 

His Father's voice whispers in his head mockingly.

 

 _That everything would work out just because you willed it so_?

 

Like a fool, he did.

 

They all did.

 

But it doesn't matter now. There are much bigger things to worry about besides old, hateful words.

 

It's like a row of dominoes, from there. The others are emboldened —those that straddled the fence picking a clear side after much insecure teetering. Kimimaro, after much internal anguish, decides that it's best to go with Sai and Ino.

 

“There's strength in numbers.” He says, but he wants the opportunity to explore, too. He's the most sheltered out of all of them and never got the chance to experience life in a normal sense. None of them will ever be normal again—if they ever were—but Sasuke wholeheartedly wants to support him in his pursuit of knowledge.

 

Naruto voices similar leanings, happy at Kimimaro’s progress, but it's obvious that he's quite sore about this departure. Like Sora, Kimimaro needed more guidance than the others. More care, more attention, since he'd been neglected for so long before.

 

But the fruits of their labor have bore beautiful fruit, since Kimimaro speaks and thinks for himself now. It's infinitely rewarding that he's come this far, but Sasuke’s certain that Naruto fully expected to be able to guide him a little further. To still have someone to take care of, when the dust finally settled.

 

It's been robbed of him thrice, now.

 

How cruel.

 

Kiba’s next, hesitating with a grimace and a shrug. He’ll come back, if Naruto asks. Ready and willing whenever, he says. But he wants to go back to Earth. To his mother and to Hinata, he admits with a bit of a blush. It's been so long since he's seen her and he misses her. That's not all of course, but everyone decides that it's best not to embarrass him further.

 

Sasuke can't help but think this is his fault, in a way. His star-crossed lovers’ routine and subsequent reunion with Naruto must have triggered the flood within everyone else, driving them to take a chance at things they never thought possible before. He's happy for them, but—

 

Tenten will be going with him. She does not give her reasons beside seeing her home again, but Sasuke has the distinct impression that her first stop after her parents will be to find Neji. They were always close and the two of them make sense together.

 

Karin will be the last on that ship—for now—since there's no place for her here. Her own words, as their fearsome foursome has dwindled to an unfortunate duo. Her reasons for being here are truly gone and her status as a Hunter is unclear. She needs time to figure that out but also pledges her assistance if she gets called upon.

 

Sasuke will miss them sorely; More black marks on his heart that he fears may prove permanent.

 

That's everyone, save for himself, Naruto and Taka. Sasuke can't help but feel a profound sense of loss and awkwardness. No one? No one else wants to stay? Is their continued resistance so fruitless that they are to be truly abandoned? It seems so, from the sound of it.

 

Naruto takes this news in stride, mask cracking ever so. It feels like...Sasuke isn't sure what it feels like. Not good, that's for certain. Like the end of all things. Divergent paths with little hope of overlapping again.

 

But this is what the fought for, isn't it? That's what freedom is.

 

A choice.

 

None of them had a choice for a very long time. Starving as they were, their scraps have finally formed into a meal. There is no fault to be had when they scramble to swallow it down. It's not selfishness when their sense of self was skewed so thoroughly before.

 

Even if this feels like abandonment and betrayal to his complicated mind, Sasuke will do his best to convince himself that it's not.

 

“So that's it, then.” Naruto says finally, sighing heavily.

 

“Naruto—” Tenten begins, eyes sad. He waves her off, putting on a small smile.

 

“No, no. It's okay. I said no judgment and I meant that.” He says, eyes bright and full. “You all deserve the world and to be able to do whatever you want. I'm glad we made it this far together. Thank you for sticking this out with me.”

 

His voice wavers at the end and Sasuke isn't having it. He wants no part of tears today, of sobbing into each other's shoulders. He just can't handle it.

 

Gaara seems to agree, stepping forward to ask: “And you? Don't you deserve the world too? What do you gain if you fight for the humans? They'll never thank you for it.”

 

He’s right. They won't.

 

“That doesn't mean they should be left to die.” Naruto retorts. “But we aren't about to argue that right now. I'm not even sure if I'm going to, anyway. I just think we should because that's what's right.”

 

No one has a rebuttal for that, so they let it rest.

 

“I feel like this is a pointless question.” Shikamaru says. “But what will you do, Sasuke?”

 

“I go where Naruto goes.” Sasuke replies confidently. Now and forever. Even if they're going to die, even if the world burns around them, even if all the good they did turns out to be more useless than it’s already proved to be—

 

Now and forever.

 

Naruto smiles at him but it doesn't reach his eyes. He didn't expect it to.

 

Sasuke turns to Taka who’s sitting beside him, carefully watching the proceedings. He notices Sasuke stare and turns to regard him.

 

“What do you want to do?” He asks Taka quietly. “You're your own person. You can do whatever you want now. We're free.”

 

—Aren’t we?

That’s frustratingly

Unclear.

 

Taka shrugs nonchalantly, rapping his fingers against his knee. “I honestly don't care. I'll stay with you, if that's okay.”

 

“It is.” Sasuke replies immediately. It's a bit strange that they'll be two of him running around but the day has proven to be incredibly lonely and he will pull anyone closer who wishes to be near, still. “But you're really fine with that?”

 

“There's nowhere else for me to be.” Taka mutters, tucking his hair behind his ear. “And if you're going back into the fight you'll need someone else watching your back.”

 

That's kind of him. Sasuke nods, appreciative, before turning back to the larger conversation.

 

“So, when's everyone leaving?” Sai asks, looking around the room. It's stifled in here, a strange mix of despair and remorse and hopefulness and ambition.

 

Everyone shifts uncomfortably at the question, not looking at each other.

 

It's Kiba who speaks up, mumbling: “Let's not worry about that yet, yeah? Let’s just enjoy the time we still have.” Then, softer: “It's nice that we can spend time together in a little peace and quiet.”

 

“It really is.” Ino agrees, and they lapse into silence.

 

**…**

 

Later— when the day’s grown old and the birds are quiet—Sasuke’s quietly brings Naruto something to eat.

 

He retreated not too soon after they spent the afternoon chatting and reminiscing, near dusk. Despite how it began, Sasuke feels that this day was good. He laughed more than he had in years—Snorting a few times, much to his embarrassment, at Sai and Kiba’s titillating banter.

 

For the first time since they met with his brother and Kakashi, Sasuke feels close with everyone again. Don't get him wrong; He's still very much raw and wishful for a future with all of them in it, side by side, but he didn't let it damper the moment. He's still glad he has the chance to make more memories before they go.

 

Still, it's not like Naruto to skip dinner no matter how upset he is. Sasuke takes it upon himself to grab a few things and delivers them to their quarters.

 

His love sits in a heap on the floor, clutching the only remaining photo of his daughter.

 

There were more besides the one he's seen, but Naruto gave them to Sakura when she left. Better in her hands, he’d said, since he was sure that he would die at Ethelred.

 

Sasuke pauses in the doorway, hands gripping the tray he holds harder. His breath catches as he takes a cautious step forward, unsure.

 

Naruto’s face is dry but his eyes are red, like he considered crying but decided against it. The thought is almost funny to Sasuke until those red eyes look up at him, widening slightly since he hadn't heard Sasuke come in.

 

Sasuke can recall seeing him cry plenty of times before. All kinds of tears for all kinds of reasons. So, it's easy to tell what brand of tears they are when the moment arises.

 

These? They aren’t happy tears. Sasuke doesn’t think any of his tears have been happy for a long while.

 

They don’t speak for what feels like ages. Naruto stares, eyes falling lower and lower until they close and small sob escapes his mouth.

 

“Naruto?” He hears himself say quietly. He understands. Fuck, he understands. For once he does, and he hates it.

 

Naruto shakes his head, eyes opening back up in a way that almost looks painful. He licks his quivering lips,  and meets his eyes.

 

“Sorry, sorry. I’m fine.” Naruto says before laughing humorlessly. “I just thought I'd be ready but I'm—I’m not.”

 

It's not easy to have a family again just for it to disappear at the blink of an eye. But misery loves them even if they don't love her back.

 

Sasuke discards his tray on the small table near the door before leaning down to embrace him. Naruto melts into him, leaning bodily on his shoulder, shuddering.

 

“I didn't think it'd be like this.” Naruto whispers. “I know I’m being stupid and stubborn and they're right to leave because we don't have to do this. We don’t owe anyone anything but—” He pauses, throat croaking. “But don't leave me. Please.”

 

Sasuke kisses his hair, nuzzling him close. “I won't. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere.”

 

Empty platitudes, since Naruto’s finally feeling the weight of everything they've done. Sasuke cannot hope to quell the tornado inside him as it tears away all the doors and windows. He has to let it rage until the sky clears up and the sun shines through.

 

Naruto grips at his arms tighter, regardless. Minor comforts are still comforts, especially at a time like this.

 

“I don't think they understand.” Naruto continues quietly, voice muffled into Sasuke’s chest. He pulls back to stare at Sasuke with his watery gaze. “I did all of this to avenge her, you know? But also so no one else would have to go through that like me and Sakura did. I can't...I can't save every child and I know that, but I could change how the world sees us.”

 

“We did, didn't we?” Sasuke asks since he can do little else. He rubs what he hopes is a comforting hand down Naruto’s back. “It's not like we failed.”

 

“But we did, in a way.” Naruto insists. “We left the worlds in the hands of some insane killers who want to kill women and children because of what they are. How is that any different from what happened to us? How can I say that this was all in her name when I know that this is the outcome? That's fucked up.”

 

It is.

 

That's all Sasuke can think. It really is.

 

“I just don't know what to do.” Naruto says after a while. He leans back into Sasuke’s shoulder and sighs.

 

Sasuke has no idea, either. There's so much at stake, so much that's already gone wrong. Can he take much more of this? He wants to support Naruto as best he can but what really can they do, with just the three of them?

 

It will take months to gather more allies, maybe years. Those amongst them that pledged their support won't be back around for a while, caught up in their own adventures that take them elsewhere. Who’s to say that they can even fight what's happening even if they get the support they need?

 

They don't know the other members of Red Dawn, don't know how deeply embedded they are in all of this. They've only seen the surface and that was bad enough; what he understood from Itachi’s speech is that the matter may have progressed too far for them to stop it.

 

But if Naruto wants to try he’ll try with him. It's the least he can do.

 

“I don't either.” He admits. “But we can sit here together until we figure it out.”

 

He hopes that enough. Enough to keep Naruto from falling over the edge that calls them closer with each passing day.

 

Naruto sighs again, pressing closer. He doesn't say anything but Sasuke didn't expect him to.

 

They don't talk much, after that.

* * *

 

**B.**

Taka disappears for a few days, saying that he'll return. No one doubts him so he sets off without a fuss.

 

Naruto’s still a little fuzzy, floating around their hold like he's haunting the place. His color slowly returns and he's smiling again, participating in the games the others play and sharing old stories from the past. It's obvious that he still isn't ready for everyone to be separated but he's at least trying to make the most of the time they still have.

 

There's no rush, anyway. They take their time before separating because there's been no updates on any happenings in the colonies besides the usual protests and think pieces. From the looks of it, everything is quiet. Almost suspiciously quiet: a bit like the calm before the storm, the news stations say.

 

They don't know the half of it.

 

When Taka returns, he does so with news. He pulls Sasuke aside without preamble and crowds in close to whisper: “Father wants you to come home.”

 

Oh.

 

Sasuke completely forgot about his own family, too wrapped up in what the others were doing. He wasn't supposed to stay up here forever. His mission is no doubt done so of course his parents would want him to return.

 

Now, when he thinks about it, he never did consider himself or his own feelings. He knew that he wanted to stay with Naruto above all else, but that's it. He did not think of his mother or her loneliness; he did not think of Neji and their friendship. He did not consider if going after Itachi was a good idea when he doesn't even recognize him anymore.

 

He probably should have, shouldn't he?

 

“Alright.” Is all he can say. Taka raises an eyebrow, snorting.

 

“That's all? You know you have to answer him or he'll drag you back himself.”

 

He can certainly try. He’ll be unpleasantly surprised to learn that Sasuke has gained some bite to him. He doesn't plan to let his father control him forever but can he really leave his mother like that? Her eldest son has been lost to her for some time—even more so now, even though she doesn't know it—but Sasuke? He's her baby.

 

—In more ways

 than one,

Second son.

 

How cruel it would be to leave without saying goodbye and then never return. He's not sure he has the stomach for it. But what can he do? He's being pulled in too many directions and has no idea which to follow.

 

“Let me think about it.” Sasuke says, ignoring how Taka managed to get word from his father in the first place. “I'll have my answer soon.”

 

He probably won't.

 

Taka knows this, but he doesn't comment on it. Instead, he sighs, looking at Sasuke with guarded eyes.

 

“I have a solution, I think.” Taka says quietly, looking away. “A way to make everyone happy.”

 

That's impossible at this point. Sasuke knows this, but he doesn't comment on it. Instead, he sighs, looking at Taka with unsure eyes.

 

“Okay. Tell me.”

 

He does, and Sasuke blinks at him in surprise.

 

Oh.

 

The thought hadn't even crossed his mind. That's —

 

“Just think about it.” Taka says, shrugging. “Tell me what you decide soon, alright? Also, take this. There’s something interesting inside.”

 

He hands Sasuke a small paper bag, slightly soggy from its time out in the elements. Sasuke raises an eyebrow and Taka only shrugs. His eyes are serious though, very telling and strange. Taka says nothing and Sasuke didn't expect him to.

 

With that he turns to leave. Both of them freeze when they see Naruto leaning near the door, arms folded, watching them with an unreadable expression. Taka swallows uncomfortably and shares a look with Sasuke, ducking his head as he passes by Naruto to exit the room.

 

Naruto watches him go, pursing his lips. “You probably should have closed the door if you wanted to talk in private.” He says, doing just that.

 

Sasuke rolls his eyes. It wouldn't matter since he was intent on being nosey, but whatever.

 

“I take it you heard?” Sasuke asks. Of course he did, and they both know it.

 

“Your father wants you home.” Naruto says casually, but his eyes are sharp and searching, his body stiff. He must not find what he's looking for since he relaxes a bit. “I forgot all about him, if I'm honest.”

 

“Me too.” Sasuke agrees. “It's been hectic.”

 

Naruto nods, looking around the room at everything but Sasuke. He worries his lip between his teeth before their eyes meet again.

 

“Do you...want to go home?” Naruto asks carefully. Sasuke feels his brow jump in surprise. “And don't say anything corny like your home is wherever I am. I want to know seriously.”

 

Sasuke snorts, caught. He was going to say something similar and Naruto has to bite down a grin when he sees the look on his face.

 

“I don't think I've asked you what _you_ want to do, really. It's been all about me.” Naruto says, scratching the back of his head, face guilty. “You don't have to go along with whatever I want, Sasuke. If you want to go back to Earth I completely understand. I won't be upset.”

 

Well that's a fucking lie if he ever heard one, but Naruto’s trying his best to be sincere.

 

“And leave you behind? Never.” Sasuke says with certainty. Naruto shakes his head, looking away once more.

 

“I'd...go with you. I want us to stay together and if that's where you want to go, I'll go, too.”

 

Sasuke can't ask that of him. He can't ask him to resist his ideals and sense of justice to pretend everything is fine. Can't ask him to ignore the plight of others so they can live out some blissful fantasy, away from it all.

 

“You'd be okay with that?” Sasuke asks warily. He doesn't want Naruto to grow to resent him if they stand by and watch the universe fall to shit.

 

“I'm not okay with any of this.” Naruto admits. “No matter what we do I can't say what's right for us. I'm really fucking confused and upset and all I know is that I just want to be with you.” He huffs out, voice rising slightly.

 

Sasuke licks his suddenly dry lips, unsure what to say. Naruto collects himself, closing his eyes and regulating his breathing.

 

“I'm tired too. I miss my parents, I miss Neji and Hinata. Hell, I even miss old man Jiraiya and his stale candies. I think...It wouldn't be so bad to go home for a while. To rest. I haven't been able to in so long and I haven't been home in ages. Would it really so bad if we aren't the ones to pick up the mantle this time?”

 

Is he asking Sasuke that, or himself?

 

Sasuke can't possibly answer that. He can't look at him either, since he forgot that he never told Naruto of Jiraiya's fate. He'll leave that for another day.

 

“Or maybe we can go somewhere else. Disappear. Not tell anyone where we're going. Just me and you.” Naruto tries. Sasuke attempts to not let it show on his face how infinitely appealing that sounds. He's pretty sure he fails.

 

But, still—

 

“I don't know if I can leave things as they are with Itachi.” Sasuke admits after a while. It's already haunted him enough, hasn't it? He didn't think his guilt at his own inaction when it came to his brother could be any worse, but it is.

 

“I know.” Naruto says, stepping closer.

 

“I’m not sure if I can save him either, if I'm honest.” Sasuke hates how small his voice sounds but he can't help it. So heavy, so heavy. He doesn't want to hold it up anymore but his arms refuse to let go. “He might be too far gone.”

 

“We can try, if you want.” Naruto replies, gently stroking his face. Sasuke catches his hand and kisses it, holding it against his cheek and closing his eyes.

 

They don't talk for a long time, quietly soaking in each other's presence. Sasuke’s curiosity gets the best of him in the end, and he can't help but open the bag that Taka’s left him.

 

Oh.

 

“I think I know what we should do.” He says. Naruto raises an eyebrow, smoothing Sasuke’s hair back as he waits for him to speak.

 

“Tell me.” Naruto mutters softly.

 

And he does.

* * *

 

**C.**

Sasuke steps off of the vessel ship, the noonday sun immediately beating down heavily on his brow.

 

He'd forgotten how warm Earth was in late spring, compared to the colonies. He feels like he's wearing way too many clothes despite how lightly he's dressed.

 

Kiba slings a friendly arm around his shoulder, squeezing. He's grinning and excited; Sasuke is too, if he's honest. They're safe and home, and even if it won't be like this soon —this is the last “holdout” after all— they're going to enjoy the quiet time they have left.

 

“We made it!” Kiba says happily, ruffling Sasuke’s hair. Sasuke nods, grinning, before he sees Karin and Tenten exiting behind them. They look happy too, glad to be on solid ground instead of careening through space. They share a round of hugs before everyone's pulling away begrudgingly.

 

It's reminiscent of a few days ago, when they all set off for good.

 

 It happened slowly over the course of the week, strangely in order.

 

Gaara, Temari, and Shikamaru left first—The rest waved them off until they couldn't see their ship anymore, a mere twinkle in the sky like an errant star. A very formal departure since the three of them aren’t ones to cry. Shikamaru still got a bit choked up regardless, especially when it was just the six of them in a private embrace.

 

Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Kiba, Ino and Tenten—standing together with their arms looped around each other's necks, quiet and swaying. They didn't say much, just held on for dear life until it was time to go. Shikamaru nodded to himself before stepping away, sniffling, but he managed to plaster on a sunny grin that Sasuke will no doubt remember forever.

 

Sasuke even got a handshake from Gaara —stiff and awkward as it was—before he left and he pretended like he didn't see Kiba and Naruto stifling their laughter in their fists.

 

Ino cried for far too long when it was her time, dragging them all down with her. There was far too much snot and sniveling, but Sasuke still wished her the best around their tears, sharing a manly hug with Sai and a less dignified one with Kimimaro.

 

“Take care of yourself.” He whispered to him, to which Kimimaro rolled his eyes—affectionately, of course—saying quite snarkily;

 

“You two are the ones we have to worry about.” But Sasuke can't even argue with that since he's right.

 

Finally, those bound for Earth depart after securing safe passage. Sasuke sleeps through most of the journey, dreamless, before they're stepping off to greet the sun.

 

“Don't be a stranger.” Karin says, stepping away. She winks at him. Sasuke only chuckle in response; that's impossible for them now, after everything. He pulls her close one last time before she disappears off of the platform.

 

Kiba’s next, anxious to see Hinata. Sasuke smirks at him, reveling in the other man's dainty blush.

 

“I didn't make fun of you when you were embarrassing yourself making cow eyes at Naruto!” He protests. “Leave me alone!”

 

That's fair, so Sasuke will let him off the hook for now.

 

Tenten’s much quieter in her excitement to see Neji, but it's still there. Her eyes are shining like constellations, a small smile dotting her face. Sasuke elbows her to get her attention. She was too caught up looking around at the new things down here, from the glowing market stalls that weren't there before to the talking neon signs and the cloud-covered skyscrapers.

 

“It got even more crowded, didn't it?” She asks around a grin.

 

“Yeah. Smells even worse, too.” Sasuke says.

 

Tenten laughs, spinning in a little circle as she takes it all in.

 

“It's good to be home.” She says softly. There's so much wrapped up in that. Too much to put into words. Sasuke understands, nodding to her. It means so much when none of them thought they'd ever be able to say that again.

 

“We'll catch up later, okay?” He says. She nods vigorously, chirping: “Of course!” Before she turns to leave.

 

He watches her go before he sighs and steps off the platform, head quietly dodging a dangerously-low floating bike above him. The man in front of him screams obscenities at the rider, shaking his fist this way and that, but all Sasuke can do is roll his eyes. He hates Downtown and how much of a mess it is, but this time it's familiarity brings a smile to his face.

 

Yes. It is good to be home.

 

He couldn't agree more.

…

 

He decides to walk instead of taking the train to his parents’ house. He knows the way like the back of his hand; It’s embedded deep after so many years of walking the same path day in and day out. It doesn't matter how long he's been away—where he's been, who he's seen, what he's done— he’ll always know his way back home.

 

Sasuke rehearses what he's going to say in his head once he sees them. It's going to be awkward, since he left without either of their knowledge. He also has to tell his father that he won't be returning to the police force. Not after everything. That's no doubt going to be a fun conversation.

 

It doesn't matter since he doesn't get the chance to have a grand entrance; his father's reading on the porch, leg crossed while his glasses sit low on his nose. His mother tends to the plants that litter the walkway, sundress swaying in the wind. Her floppy hat threatens to blow away from the force of it but she holds it down right before it goes.

 

Picture perfect, just like he left them. The face of normalcy in an otherwise chaotic world. Sasuke can't help the snort that escapes him at the thought, thoroughly tickled by it.

 

They see him as he curves the hill, almost like they sensed him there. He hears his mother's gasp and the clatter of her watering can dropping. His father sits up straighter, book abandoned on the ground.

 

A much stronger reaction to his presence than he expected. Strangely, it leaves him fighting down tears.

 

“Sasuke?” His mother questions, rushing forward. He catches her as she flings herself into his arms, smiling when she spins them round.

 

“Mother.” He says warmly, rubbing her back.

 

She pulls back, eyes bright and shining. So much like his own, it almost hurts to look at her. He won't dare look away.

 

“What happened up there? They wouldn't tell us anything! I can’t believe everything's come out like this! Oh honey, was it awful?” She asks a mile a minute. Sasuke blinks, unsure sure what to address first.

 

“Calm down, Mikoto.” Fugaku chides gently, bounding down to them. “Can’t you see that you're flustering the boy?” His father looks at him, smilingly slightly as he looks him over like he's proud. Sasuke can't help the way his back straightens at that, wary of his scrutiny.  

 

Some things never change, do they?

 

“I'm glad you decided to come home.” His father says warmly, patting him on his back. Sasuke nods, smiling softly.

 

“There's nowhere else for me to be.” He replies seriously. His father seems pleased at his admission, so he'll leave it at that.

 

“Oh, you have to tell me everything!” His mother cries. Sasuke can understand her excitement; The colonies have always been fantastical far-off dreamlands and her own son got a front row seat gigantic mess that was the last year. If she could ignore how much she worried for his safety she probably couldn't wait to hear his version of the events.

 

They'd both lose their shit if they found out not only was he hunting rebels up in the clouds, he was one of them. He'll tactfully leave that part out of his tale.

 

“Of course, mother.” He assures. Mikoto nearly squeals, stroking his face. She looks at him lovingly, like a mother should, and it makes his heart clinch. He cannot say what he knows now, since it's already written on his parents faces. Neither one can speak the words but it doesn't matter.

 

He's always been their son. Always, always, always. It did not take some wild revelations to change that.

 

He hugs them both; it's been so long since they've been able to and it feels nice. Sasuke feels like he can't pull his mother close enough no matter how hard he tries.

 

“I always knew you were my real mother.” He hears himself say, too caught up in the emotion to curb his tongue. His mother chokes on a sob and shakes in his arms.

 

He sighs into her shoulder when he feels his father surrounded the both of them, letting himself get lost in their warmth.

 

Then they're pulling away and his mother is wiping her face and tugging his arm towards the house so they can talk over lunch.

 

“Go on ahead, Mikoto.” Fugaku says, making Sasuke’s brow furrow in confusion. “I need a moment with Sasuke.”

 

“Alright.” She says, tutting. “But don't make me wait too long! I've done enough of that.”

 

Sasuke smiles at her reassuringly, watching her disappear behind the screen door. He turns back to look at his father, flinching at the look on his face.

 

Fugaku snatched his arm, twisting it slightly. Sasuke grimaces, trying to pull out of his grip fruitlessly.  He’s surprised by the sudden force his father shows, surprised further by the pleading, horrified look in his father’s eyes.

 

“Who are you?” Fugaku asks, swallowing hard. Sasuke freezes for a moment—staring at the ground with wide eyes— before he tuts, tilting his head to the side to look up at him. He blinks, face revealing nothing.

 

“Who else would I be?” Sasuke asks incredulously, tutting at their father’s strange question. “I’m your son, aren’t I?”

 

His arm is dropped like it burns, then his father’s stepping away and shaking his head in disbelief.

 

Fugaku’s been in this life long enough. Learned of the shadows and all the sins within it. He must have seen when Sasuke turned around. Saw and understood, in that moment.

 

He sees his father’s ashen face, frozen in realization. There’s something to be said here. Maybe. Maybe not.

 

Sasuke should. He _really_ should—

 

But he doesn't.

 

And he won't.

 

“Mother's waiting.” Sasuke reminds him pointedly.

 

Sasuke’s waiting too; he’s waiting to see if his father will ruin it.

 

If he'll tell his mother about her son’s two clean, unblemished wrists.

 

His father’s face twists but he doesn't speak. Fugaku battles internally over what this means. Maybe it’s a mistake, maybe he’s wrong, maybe it’s a bad joke gone a bit too far. But with all his old knowledge and well-kept secrets—All the things he's seen from his time with the Spies— vines creep, carrying away his grief and ushering in the bitterness—

 

So, they turn and walks back to the house.

* * *

 

_“I kept running,_

_For soft place to fall.”_

 

—Aurora, Runaway

* * *

 

Naruto sits—knees drawn up to his chest, fingers absently twirling the grass between them—watching the day pass lazily as they break to breathe. Sasuke’s arm is propped underneath his head, face upturned to the sun. He watches a flock of birds slip past high in the sky, soaring and free.

 

There's a rumbling in the distance —dark red, presenting like the fiery wings of a phoenix. A steady drumbeat that _thumps_ louder with each passing second.

 

Naruto’s hand pauses, frozen in the air, his head swiveling as he hears. Sasuke woefully turns from watching him, distracted by the noise in the distance as well.

 

Rising, rising —Booming, like fireworks. So loud it's almost hard to think. Too close, then. They are not ready yet to join the fray, not looking for that raucous choir singing a familiar song.

 

—All together, now!

 

After a time, it tapers off. Rust streaks the field down below and figures groan like ghosts—their voices mingling together in an eerie cacophony.

 

Then, it’s quiet.

 

Everything is quiet.

 

Naruto whistles low, standing to brush imaginary dirt off of his pant leg. He looks down at Sasuke who's still lounging. He cannot help but stare up at him like he's the brightest thing here.

 

“Here too, huh?” Naruto says causally, even though he clearly already knows. Soon they will be out of small corners to find. Soon they'll be forced out into open air and into the smoke and the flame. The time for this grows shorter.

 

“We’re getting closer, I think.” Sasuke remarks. He cannot say for sure. It's an old, half-forgotten memory that he's forced to lead off of. Tedious, but he has to.

 

His brother left this for him, after all.

 

And it's Sasuke’s duty to take care of him—one way or another.

 

Still, to this day, secrets spill from those documents they found; even more sins and convoluted riddles. Sasuke picked up on one that set his teeth on edge and sharpened his eyes with resolve.

 

“Coercion.” they call it.

 

Kind of a fancy name for “mind control”, don't you think?

 

Well, if there's even a chance — they are not stupid enough to get lost in hope but Sasuke cannot overlook this. If there's even a small piece inside of Itachi that can still be brought back into the light—

 

Sasuke’s going to take it.

 

And then he's going to—

 

He hasn't thought that far. He'll get back to you on that.

 

“You seem excited.” Naruto says with a grin. He holds his hand out for Sasuke to grab.

 

Sasuke chuckles, rolling over to get his feet beneath him. He takes Naruto’s offered hand and rises from their spot on the grassy hill. He sees the outlines they’ve made in the bed of flowers and he smiles _._

 

 “I think I am.” Sasuke replies easily. It’s very hard to distinguish one emotion from another these days.  

 

The clouds part above them like a curtain. A heavy fireball descends on the silent field below, eradicating any stragglers left under a layer of brimstone.

 

“East?” Naruto asks in confirmation, eyes trained on the smoke. Sasuke nods even though the other man can't see him. He feels the drum beat in his own bones—a _thump, thump, thumping_ that threatens to overtake him.

 

“East.” Sasuke echoes, checking his map again, just to be sure. There's a niggling in his gut. One that been present since they set off. One that has him asking quietly: “Do you really think —”

 

Naruto doesn't let him get far. He anticipated this. Sasuke’s been doubting ever since they heard of the possibility, even though he's barely vocalized it. He won't let him go down that road.

 

“I don't know.” Naruto replies calmly. He isn't upset at the repeating questioning—few and far between as it is— he's still in command when it's just the two of them. Confident and reassuring even when he isn't.

 

“I don't know, but it's worth looking into, isn't it?” Naruto continues.

 

“It is.” Sasuke confirms.

 

“Then we'll do it.”

 

It's a simple as that.

 

Sasuke looks down at his hand, holding a small trinket that his brother hid for him where only he could find. A woven leather bracelet, frayed and weathered from all the years it's been around. They had made them together, once upon a time.

 

He didn't know his brother still had such a thing—Sasuke’s is long gone, broken in a particularly bad bout of anger. He regrets that now. Maybe he always has.

 

It's something that proves his love for Sasuke, that backed up his claim that he was always thinking about him. Maybe. Is a childhood gift really so significant?

 

It feels like it is. Especially when it was tied around a small, empty potions bottle. Sasuke had no idea what was originally inside but he's wary of it.

 

The contents now? They sent chills down his spine, set his bones on edge, and spurred his legs forward.

 

The last picture they took together as a family. A copy, since the real one sits on his mother's mantel. How did he get that? The edges are crinkled like they've been held a little too tightly every now and again.

 

A map that guides them. Sasuke thinks he might know where, even though it hasn't been confirmed yet. The nights are very dark here. That's all he knows.

 

Last: A small, curving note in his brother's unmistakable handwriting that reads:

 

“Help me.”

 

Sasuke has no answer for that.

 

Not yet.

 

But he's going to find it.

 

“Alright.” Sasuke says, nodding. Naruto takes the map from him, face screwing up at all the lines they crossed off that lead to nowhere. So many dead ends but it feels like they're close.

 

“Orochimaru’s a hard man to track down.” Naruto remarks quietly, passing over the map with his thumb.

 

“Yeah.” Sasuke agrees absently, eyes on the carnage below. “I doubt he's really open to visitors.”

 

“Too bad. We still have questions and he's going to answer them.”

 

“Yeah. But still—” Sasuke says, voice low.

 

“What?”

 

He'll just say it. There's no point in beating around the bush.

 

 “I _really_ don't want to see Kakashi again, but it seems unavoidable.” He could probably go the rest of his life without doing so, just for some peace of mind.

 

Naruto grins wildly, folding the map and putting it in his pocket. Sasuke’s heart beats faster and he can't help but grin back, even though he feels dread pooling his chest.

 

This could be a trap. A ruse to get Sasuke closer since apparently that's what Itachi wants. Or, he knows Naruto will follow anywhere Sasuke goes and he'll use this chance to kill him.

 

It could be all of those things or worse, but they're going to try anyway.

 

Who are they if they aren't doing something stupid that could possibly get them killed? Not Sasuke and Naruto, clearly. They're in this together, bitter end or not.

 

“Let's go, then.” Naruto says, shouldering his pack. “Daylight’s wasting.”

 

Sasuke nods, bumping shoulders with his heart and smiling when he gets a fond look in return.

 

Oh, the things he does for love.

 

This really won't end well, will it?

 

* * *

 

**End.**

“We wake up one day and and nature has grown decades overnight. We can't remember where the roads used to be. In some places the trees are so tall and thick we can barely see the sky. The grass hasn't been mowed in years. Oh, how quiet everything is, now.”

—Unknown

 

 

 

 


End file.
